It took them a while to finish fooling around in their home, clean themselves up and change into their ‘civilian’ outfits, and then they could finally check what exactly has Izuku prepared for them.
It was a swing.
He blackmailed (or just persuaded) Shigaraki into letting him do additional, temporary change into the Dungeon, and then persuaded Kinoko Komori to allow such an addition to her tree. This led to a swing now hanging off one of the tougher side branches.
“I, uhm…” Izuku - still surprisingly sheepish, is it some influence of his new species? - says, as Uraraka is staring at the swing in question (Komori has left the whole grove to them for the time being). “... remembered how you mentioned that you liked the swing that your dad made for you in your old house, before the financial troubles made you move to a smaller one and I figured out that…”
Every subsequent word is said a tiny bit quieter, as Izuku is clearly giving in to his shyness and embarrassment. Except, it doesn’t end because his voice becomes completely inaudible, it ends because Uraraka closes in and kisses him on the cheek.
He gets extremely red as a result. Uraraka loves every second of it.
“I mentioned it once.” She says while hugging him closely. “A few months and several villain battles ago. And you remembered?”
“O-of course.” Izuku looks down on his feet. “You were my b-best friend, b-best friends remember such things about e-each other, right?”
Few more weeks of this relationship and Uraraka’s pure rage will end up transcending universes and make her Earth’s version marry Izuku. Instantly. Just, no dating or anything before, they’ll just wake up in the middle of their marriage ceremony.
No need to waste any time. Just get them straight to the good stuff.
She understands that people have different preferences and that some people might look for different things in their boyfriend/girlfriend candidates, but c’mon. Izuku was just straight up perfect.
What was there not to love?
Soon after that, she finds herself on the swing, Izuku pushing it just as the two of them chat brightly, Ochako telling him how she was absolutely obsessed with the swing in her old house because when she was going upward on it, it felt as if she was going up towards the sky (and the stars dotting the night sky if it was late enough), and how once her mom ended up banning her and her dad from using the swing for a month because she - in her childish stupidity and lack of self-preservation instinct - used her quirk on herself while using said swing.
Which was a horrible idea, and made her vomit mid-flight before landing on the ground a hundred meters away and breaking her arm.
At least she used the swing much more responsibly afterwards, so not all was lost.
“In other words, you used your quirk and it b-broke your arm.” Izuku replies from behind her as he grabs the swing and pushes it away, Uraraka finding it hard not to punctuate the motion with the loud ‘weeee!’. “I guess we really fit each o-other, right?”
She ended up laughing so much that she almost fell off the swing, which made Izuku freak out a bit and yell at her to be careful, which in turn let her respond with a loud ‘You’re the last person to say that, Izuku!’.
And then they both laughed. She took advantage of that to - when the swing had her return to him - turn around just so that she could grab him in a surprise hug and kiss him, taking advantage of his hands being completely occupied to have a free reign.
Awesome!
The fact that her Earth’s version was missing out on something like that - and while being, you know, in Japan, which meant a lot more places to visit and a lot more mochi to eat - was just goddamn sad.
She is interrupted when Himiko - who was sitting on the ground a few meters away from them, observing them closely - sighs loudly, looking at them with dreamy eyes.
No, they didn’t forget about her. They just focused on themselves for a while. She clearly told them to do that, telling them to have their date and let her just observe them, but… well, now that they were reminded that she was there, it got kind of awkward.
“Uhm, how are you doing, H-Himiko?” Izuku asks, Uraraka glancing at her as well.
“Don’t mind me, really!” She replies, her head resting on her hands as she just keeps staring at them. “You two are sooo cute together! I can’t get enough of it, truly. You don’t even need to be all bloody for me, you’re super lovely and cute as you are right now!”
That was… err… slightly disturbing, but they’ve already gotten used to it. What was the worst that she could do to them if she somehow snapped? Kill them? Yeah, good luck with that. And, well…
She was cute, funny and had an absolutely endless imagination and knowledge when kinky things were involved, greatly improving their, errr, team-building exercises. So, yeah, they were willing to cut her some slack.
Izuku glances at Ochako. Ochako glances back at him. They come to a decision without saying a single word.
“Do you want to use the swing too?” Izuku asks and he immediately gets the answer from the look on her face.
“I… I can?!” Himiko says, shocked, her eyes gleaming. “I really can?! My parents never let me, and said that good girls shouldn’t play like this.”
…
“Your parents were just straight up horrible people.” Uraraka shakes her head while jumping off the swing. “C’mon, me and Izuku can push you alternately.” She definitely knew how to hype the activity more for Toga.
***
Less than half a minute later Izuku and Ochako realized that for once, Toga’s parents were right. Good girls definitely shouldn’t play like this. And it wasn’t about having fun on the swing, it was about having fun on it like that.
“She’s going to hurt herself!” Uraraka lets out as Toga - with loud sounds of happiness and joy - does another swing, her voice filled with horror.
They are no longer pushing her swing, she’s doing it with her own body. Because she was now standing on the swing. And she builds-up enough momentum to make the swing go solid ninety degrees in both directions.
She was standing perfectly sideways each time the swing reached the edge of its movement arc.
“I-I know!” Izuku says back to her, staring at the disaster in progress with wide-eyes. “Bbut how do we stop her?!”
Toga is completely unaware of their fear and horror, instead building up her speed even further with a loud WEEEE, clearly trying to build enough of it to do a full 360, consequences be damned.
Izuku would have liked seeing her so happy, but goddamnit, she’s really going to hurt herself!
And then he gets an idea.
“H-Himiko, if you get down, we’ll go d-do some c-cuddling back at home!” Izuku tries, but the loud WEEEEE (she was making that sound pretty often it seems) prevented her from hearing.
It didn’t work. Dammit, it didn’t work!
Uraraka’s mind races through many, many ways in which she could maybe reach Himiko. In her state of panic, she blurts one of them without a single conscious thought about that.
“Himiko, I’ll l-let you e-eat me out if you come down right n-now!” Uraraka says only to immediately realize what she just did as Izuku gives her a shocked look. Her first reaction is to cover her face. The other was to start screaming. “I DIDN’T MEAN TO SAY THAT! OH GOD I DIDN’T MEAN TO SAY THAT!”
“I-it’s alright, I believe you.” Izuku replies, and if his smell is anything to go by, yes, he definitely means that.
Thank all the gods that there wasn’t anyone else in the room. She would never live that down.
Unfortunately, it didn’t even work, as Himiko was too much into her fun, doing another wide swing with a loud WEEEEEEE! Himiko was a bit… Himiko was very horny most of the time, and a part of Uraraka suspected that it was because her unfortunate backstory made her be severely confused about the differences between romantic and sexual attraction.
Those two were usually - but not always - connected, but for Himiko, they were pretty much one and the same thing in absolutely every set of circumstances. When she loved you, she wanted to have sex with you. When she wanted to have sex with you, she loved you.
In a way, the fact that she had very odd preferences (like the whole ‘I’ve seen you blooded, dirtied and fighting for your life’ thing) was what made her be more or less coherent and faithful in her romantic pursuit. Otherwise she would probably be ‘falling in love’ left and right, with completely random people, which in fact would be more about finding them attractive.
Uraraka knew where her dumbest moment ever came from, but it was still stupid.
Ugh.
“H-Himiko, we’ll cuddle and do something s-sexy if you come down right now!” Izuku then surprises her by taking her idea and running with its slightly less embarrassing version. That also combines both sides of the coin.
And it works.
“E-eh, really?!” Himiko actually reacts this time, looking down at them from the swing. “I’m coming down then, Izu!”
And she does. By jumping down.
She gets to see their horrified faces for about a second, Izuku almost managing to yell the warning at her before the returning swing that she so callously abandoned hits her from the side.
At least it hit her arm rather than her head. Otherwise that might have actually killed her. Instead it just breaks a bone. In her arm.
It was a big swing and a lot of momentum.
“Owie!” Himiko yelps out. “That was a bit, err..”
She isn’t given the time to say or do anything more before they get to her.
“Ochako?” Izuku asks Himiko who was busy staring Uraraka with pure surprise on her face (and a slight flinch of pain) as Ochako was inspecting her arm for damage.
“Radius bone is definitely broken.” Uraraka shakes her head. “Welcome to the Arm Breaking Club, Himiko.”
“W-well, I…” Himiko tries to say something (the arm’s not quite in pain yet, the adrenaline is still there, at least for now), but she doesn’t have the time for that yet.
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“Shigaraki, you there?” Izuku says, staring towards the ceiling for a moment. “Great, I’m going to need splints and something to wrap around them. Look, you can tell what happened yourself, Himiko broke her arm and… I don’t care that it will hurt only for a few hours before it heals on its own, it’ll hurt a lot by then, trust me, I’m an expert.” He listens to something only he can hear for a few seconds, before frowning. “Wait, so All for One let you just hang around with a broken arm if you broke it due to making a mistake in training until… you know what, no, I’m not having that talk. Give me the splints, or we’re back to Meow Meow Dabi.”
Himiko has no idea what ‘Meow Meow Dabi’ is, but it had to be something terrifying for how successful of a threat it was. Almost immediately, a pair of splints and some cloth to use as bandages appeared out of nowhere right next to them.
“Uhm, guys, you really don’t have to…” She tries to say, but she is completely ignored.
“So, I’m taking Iida-kun’s position, right?” Izuku asks Ochako as the latter picks up the medical equipment and gives him a quick nod. “That’s going to be sooo weird, I was always the one with the broken bones.”
“Trust me, I know.” Uraraka sighs. Izuku promptly sits crosslegged on the floor, right next to a very confused Himiko. “Himiko, lie down. Your head goes there.” She adds as she points to Izuku’s lap.
Himiko does her usual thing and buries herself there, face-down, making Izuku let out a loud ‘Eeep?!’ and Ochako sigh loudly while telling her to put the side of her head there. Which is a bit less fun, but… okay?
A moment later, she discovers that the goal of the position is to have her let her broken arm rest on the side of her body so that Ochako can put it in splints and bandage it properly.
“W-well, so normally when it happened Iida-kun made me start talking about All Might to, errr, make me not focus so much on the pain.” Izuku then says as the process of bandaging starts. “Do you have anything that you’d like to ramble about, Himiko?”
“Just how often…” She says, tilting her just enough to be able to look up at his face. “... did it happen, exactly?”
“Oh, well…” Izuku blushes a bit. “A few times? I mean, I broke my arm a few times…”
“His left one five times, his right one seven times.” Uraraka comments dryly from the side. “Usually we had him lie on his back because he broke both of his arms at the same time. And there are also his legs to be counted.”
“Yes, and, errr, I also dislocated my shoulder… a few times.” Izuku continues, clearly growing more and more embarrassed by the situation.
“He did that four times.” Uraraka decides to not let that go. “It was so bad that Recovery Girl made me and Tenya go through a special training in first aid, one focused entirely on field-dressing the sort of injuries he suffered from the most often. Also, do you remember what All Might-sensei told you in front of the class after you came to the school late because you sneezed on the way to it and accidentally fired your quirk and broke your arm?”
Izuku sighs. And then his face suddenly morphs into such a great copy of All Might’s face that Himiko actually stares at him wide-eyed in shock. Just… how was that even possible?!
“Midoriya-shonen!” He then says, in a booming voice, somehow nailing even that. “If you can’t stop breaking bones, then for the love of God and heroics, break mine for a change! I can take it! Let yours rest for at least a week, please!” He then returns his face and vocal cords to their natural state. “Todoroki-kun just glanced at the whole scene for a second before pulling out his Theories and Evidence Thereof notebook and starting to scribble something down in it. Very, very fast.”
He sighs loudly. The worst part about the whole theory that All Might was secretly his father was that it was just… so emotionally confusing to him. Like, he wasn’t exactly against it, but not only did it feel like some sort of wish-fulfillment on Todoroki’s side (with him projecting what he would have liked to have in his life onto Izuku, which definitely wasn’t healthy) it was also kind of… redundant?
He is the first one to admit that All Might was sometimes treating him like his son, but that was just a part of being his mentor. He is 100% certain that Nana Shimura treated All Might the same way. All Might didn’t have to be his secret father all along for as long as he was his mentor.
It, naturally, meant being an adult who was strongly invested in a child/teenager’s success and was ready to go to great lengths to help them achieve it.
On a sidenote, thank the gods that All Might decided to be ‘his’ Nana Shimura rather than Gran Torino. Izuku remembers All Might channeling Gran Torino on him exactly once, during the Final Exams, and to put it lightly he beat the crap out of him and Kacchan.
He prefers the emotionally confusing Dad Might to that.
“And I also remember you suddenly stopping walking down the corridor with us and then immediately racing off without a word.” Uraraka then adds while shaking her head, her hands still focused on the splint. “We followed you, worried that something bad happened and thus we’ve seen you randomly run up to All Might-sensei and have the funniest but also the most concerning conversation I’ve ever heard.”
“Really?” Toga glances at Ochako. That sounded really, really fun! “What was it about?”
Ochako looks at Midoriya over her head, before speaking in a pretty good-ish approximation of his own excited voice.
“All Might-sensei!” She shouts with stars in her eyes. “I figured out how to stop breaking my arms!” In the background, Izuku sighs, tells himself that it’s for the sake of distracting Himiko and puts up his best All Might impression.
“That’s wonderful news, Midoriya-shonen!” He then says in the Number One Hero’s booming voice. “Please, tell me more!”
“I have legs!” Uraraka lets out, making Izuku/All Might’s face warp into the expression of sheer terror, the last thing that Himiko could ever imagine on the Symbol of Peace’s face.
“Midoriya, NO!” Izuku then lets out, prompting Himiko to have a giggling fit. He immediately returns to his normal face. “Look, what I meant to say is that I decided to move from punching to kicking, which due to legs being stronger than arms should decrease the amount of… accidents, but I was so excited that it came out a bit, errr, unclear.”
Maybe it was unclear, Himiko thinks to herself while giggling loudly, but definitely super hilarious!
“It was the first and last time that I saw All Might-sensei drop the shojo and shonen while talking to a student.” Uraraka shakes her head. “Truly, a great achievement, Izuku. Anyway, I think I’m done here. How does it feel, Himiko?”
“W-well, it still kinda hurts.” Himiko replies while slightly moving her broken arm. “But less so! Thank you! And, uhm…” She says as she lifts herself up to sit. “... sorry for ruining the date. I got a bit too, errr, excited with the swing and…”
“It’s fine, it’s fine.” Uraraka replies while helping her stand up, Izuku doing the same from the other side. “If we didn’t expect you to quote unquote interrupt us at some point and weren’t alright with that, we wouldn’t invite you to the date. And besides, now that you have broken your own arm, you’re officially a part of our secret club of arm-breakers. Izuku’s the president, of course, as I only broke my arm once and as a child.”
Izuku just sighs. He’s now a talking, reality-warping tesseract lost in another world and somehow, just somehow, Ochako is still on the bone juice thing. This was never going to change, wasn’t it?
“Secret club?” Himiko grins back at her. “Is the first rule of it to not tell anyone that it exists?”
“No.” Uraraka replies dryly. “The first rule of this is to know how to field-dress broken bones, especially when Izuku’s around.” Izuku sighs again but says nothing. “On the subject of the club, though, I miss Iida-kun.” Izuku can’t help but agree with her. “But I’m really not sure when and how we should introduce him to this world.”
“Huh, why?” Himiko asks her, tilting her head a little
“He’s a bit… okay, he’s very straight-laced.” Uraraka replies while shaking her head. “A stickler for all the rules. He will have problems with us cooperating with the villains, with Yanagi-san doing whatever she’s doing with all the corpses in her laboratory and even with me enjoying fighting people to death, a lot, because murder is apparently illegal, even when it's self defense.”
“Tenya Iida will complain about murdering people?” Himiko asks, clearly even more confused. Wait, did she… “Didn’t he try to murder the Hero Killer in Hosu? I heard Shiggy and his Sensei talking about how he almost died trying to do that and only survived because Izu and Endeavor’s son arrived in time and they all defeated Stain together, but the police decided to attribute the capture to Endeavor as otherwise they’d have to arrest Iida for vigilantism.”
… oh, crap, she actually knew what happened in Hosu.
Izuku’s entire life flashes before his eyes as Ochako’s head turns to face him.
“Oh, really?” She then says with a face neutral, too neutral, and this time, Izuku can feel himself shrinking under her gaze. “So a certain call for help wasn’t because you’ve accidentally run into the noumus? And Iida-kun’s injury wasn’t because of fighting them, in self-defense?”
“W-we-hehehehe…” Izuku tries to start his response with the word ‘well’, only to have it devolve into a derange-sounding nervous laughter. “In o-our defense, we were m-made to sign NDAs about it!”
“Yes, Izuku.” She squints at him, Himiko only now realizing that she just ruined Izuku’s chances of surviving this day. “Because papers that you’ve signed were always so precious to you.” He gulps loudly. “I love you, Izuku. And that’s why I’m going to give you a ten seconds long headstart. Start running.”
She doesn’t have to tell him that twice. Izuku turns on his heels and sprints out of the [Hamadryad’s Grove], being so afraid for his life that he actually forgets that he’s immortal and that he can just despawn.
Uraraka is generous enough to give him the ten seconds headstart she promised. But she isn’t generous enough to not use [Predator’s Advance] to catch up with him quickly.
Himiko runs after them, ignoring her broken arm and giggling loudly the whole time. Her two cuties were soooo silly! But that just made them cuter in her eyes!
***
In the end, Izuku is captured and mercilessly tickled until he surrenders, apologizes and promises to do his best to make up for lying to her through omission (as the actual one to say a lie to her was Iida-kun, and yes, he is getting super-tickled for it too).
It takes them a while to decide on what he can do to properly apologize for his great sin, and in the end it’s Himiko (who has at this point caught up with them) that gives Uraraka a great idea for an apology.
All of that leads to them being back in their apartment. Izuku sits in the middle, with Ochako to his right and Himiko to his left. They are lying on their chests, their heads resting on his thighs.
His hands are very, very busy petting their backs.
Or, to be exact, he’s scratching the back of Himiko’s neck with his left hand, which makes her purr nearly constantly. As for Ochako, his right hand is supposed to scratch her back randomly, from the base of her tail to the neck.
As one can imagine from this description, Ochako wasn’t exactly wearing anything right now, allowing him unrestricted access to a lot of scratchable space and also making his imagination race nigh-constantly.
Definitely a part of the punishment.
It was all fur, by the way. With how the Karadian Beastkin worked, their backs were entirely covered with fur. Short, yes, extremely so, but it felt… soft. It actually felt pretty nice to scratch it.
It also had to feel awesome to be scratched like that, especially considering how Himiko’s head was practically vibrating on his thigh with how intensely she was purring, and how Ochako’s tail was swinging in both ways rather vigorously.
“U-uhm, girls?” He decides to speak after all. “H-how long is this going to continue? I think that it’s been at least t-two hours. My hands are starting to tire, and even my back starts to complain, it’s not exactly the most comfortable position and…”
Ochako and Himiko open their eyes, glancing up at him and Izuku immediately resigns himself to his fate.
Except, he is actually spared from it.
“Alright, alriiiight.” Uraraka sighs loudly. “I guess I don’t want you to be too uncomfortable, especially as you learned your lesson about not lying, right? Even through omission?” Izuku nods quickly a few times. “You’re officially forgiven then. Anything else that you weren’t allowed to share with me in the past but you can do that right now?”
Well, Shigaraki or Himiko were going to spill the beans sooner or later, right? He can as well do it himself and be done with it.
“The reason why All Might was acting so fatherly towards me and why our quirks are so similar isn’t our secret father-son relationship but his quirk being a special one, transferred from one vigilante or hero to another for generations, and he has chosen me as his successor and gave it to me even before I got to the UA.” Izuku recites quickly and surprisingly smoothly. He didn’t even stutter for once!
“What?” Ochako says, her chin still on his thigh, but her eyes now wide-opened and staring at his face.
***
Lanna isn’t sure what she expected from her first day in this Dungeon, but definitely not this.
It was bad enough when the Dungeon Lord was just wrestling and petting one of the gravehounds. Now that he came back (while grumbling something about normies wasting productive time with their shenanigans) he was actually throwing a wooden branch (it’s way too large to call a stick) and had the gravehound bring it back to him.
And the gravehound was doing it, receiving extra pets and hugs for being a ‘good boi’, all while also being called a ‘chonky pupper’.
Lanna isn’t sure if ‘chonky pupper’ is a good way to describe 75kg of pure murder, bred in a Spiritual World to act as an undying scourge for those disrespecting the sanctity of death, but… alright? The dog was clearly liking the Dungeon Lord, so it was fine… right?
Right?