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The Core Problem
35: Relationship Upgrades

35: Relationship Upgrades

“Please, let me extend my sincerest apologies for intruding upon your domain.” Anaya doesn’t remain surprised for long and quickly takes the helm. She even bows her head a little! “We wished to meet you but we couldn’t do that without entering your Domain.”

Anaya could probably kill them all with her hands bound behind her back and her eyes covered. Seeing her act so nice was a bit… surreal? Weird? It really told Izuku a lot about how much of a big deal Dungeons were.

“You invade my domain, destroy my things and now you want to talk?” Shigaraki squints at Anaya angrily. “You’re annoying.”

Did he borrow the word from Aeonia? Whatever it was, it was working. Who would have thought that Shigaraki would play the role of a socially and emotionally underdeveloped manchild so well?

Right, Izuku. Although in hindsight, calling Shigaraki a ‘manchild’ sounds… mean. Izuku doesn’t like being mean. Is it some leftover anger caused by Shigaraki being mean to his own mom?

Oh, right. Izuku promptly forgets about feeling guilty.

“That’s perfectly understandable.” Anaya gets neither intimidated nor cowed by Shigaraki’s manchild act and instead stays perfectly polite. “However, we have come carrying gifts that we hope you’ll accept as a recompense for our intrusion and the damages caused. All we wish for in exchange is for you to listen to us.”

Shigaraki stares at her wordlessly and without blinking for a few seconds. Izuku is about to start worrying that he was about to do something stupid, only for him to prove that he remembered what he was supposed to do.

“Go on.” Shigaraki replies.

“Your domain possesses many things that are of limited value to you, but of great interest to us.” Anaya replies. “We’re willing to deliver you a periodic tribute in things that you’re yet to assimilate, in exchange for you allowing us and others like us to visit you regularly.”

That was pretty much what they expected the beastkin to want from them. An eternally replenishing wellspring of resources, with a twist that harvesting them had difficulty proportional to their value.

“Sounds annoying.” Shigaraki finally blinks. A whopping one time since this talk started. And he doesn’t seem to be in the mood for doing it again anytime soon. “You want to be able to come here and destroy my things? And I’m supposed to agree?”

“Our tribute will include things that can only be obtained far away from your domain.” Anaya replies. “So far that you can’t hope to obtain them through your servants. I assure you that this deal will be beneficial for both sides.”

Shigaraki once again stares at her for a few seconds, without a word and without blinking. If his goal is to make her feel uncomfortable, he’s likely succeeding. Especially as he has definitely made Izuku uncomfortable.

Wait.

Izuku remembers him acting similarly during the USJ and the mall encounter, but… less so. Much less so. Did he…

… did he train unblinking stares to appear more intimidating? By making himself look like a psychopath? He didn’t, right? Right?

“Go on.” Shigaraki eventually says, interrupting Izuku’s musing as to whether he should ask him about it.

“You’d allow one group of our kin to enter your domain each week.” Anaya immediately proceeds to present their offer. Uzar and Yla continued to stay quiet, flanking the elder and letting her speak. “They’d be allowed to harvest plants, mine minerals and slay the creatures inhabiting your domain, in exchange for the aforementioned tribute. They also wouldn’t damage things such as shrines, creature lairs and so on.”

“Hmm.” Shigaraki does an almost convincing thinking face (though it probably looked genuine to the beastkin). “What if they die?”

“Then that’s that.” Anaya replies. Wow, social darwinism much? Then again, it was more about the value of human life being pretty low in this world. “The only thing we’d like to ask you is to not actively attempt to kill them all. Do not attack them with servants or spirits that are beyond the natural limits of the floor that they’re on. We’d also like you to respect their decision to abandon their run into your domain.”

“Abandon their run?” Shigaraki furrows his brows.

“They might find themselves outmatched by what they encountered in your domain.” Anaya replies. “If that happens, they’ll signify their surrender by waving a white cloth, which should be a signal for your servants to disengage. When that happens, they’ll leave behind everything they obtained during the run and all that they brought into your domain with them, with an exception of clothes, a single set of weapons of their choice, camping supplies and food."

Oh? So it wasn’t about social darwinism but about teaching the challengers a lesson in humility without slaughtering them all instantly and while making their defeats sting? That made sense.

“Armor pieces?” Shigaraki asks. “Mage robes?” Huh, good question.

“Yours to take.” Anaya replies. “By ‘clothes’ I meant anything that covers one's body that isn’t directly associated with being used for combat. If it’s supposed to protect you or is associated with professions of combat nature, you can take them. But please allow them to leave with something to cover their shame and protect them from the elements on the way back.”

This was the first time ever that Izuku heard someone trying to describe civilian clothes without just calling them that way. Or in any other adjective like that.

“What will I get for that?” Shigaraki says. Izuku knew the answer already and he suspects that he did so as well, he was just acting the manchild. Probably.

“You can consider a part of the tribute to be our reimbursement for opportunities lost by accepting their defeat.” Anaya replies. And yes, that was pretty much what Izuku expected her to say.

“Hmmm…” Shigaraki humms while scratching his arm. The intensity of the actions increases quickly as Shigaraki is busy ‘thinking’ whether to accept the offer or not. Was he trying to get Anaya to offer some additional things to convince him? “Hmmm…”

“We will also do our best to protect you.” Anaya decides to add another argument, completely unaware of the fact that she was falling for Shigaraki’s ruse. “Groups that will visit you will set up a camp nearby. If someone threatens you, you will be able to call them for aid.”

Or… what if she didn’t fall for his ruse? What if that was something that she intended to do from the start to have an eye on other visitors? After all, the beastkin seemed curious as to where Luna’s and Occasa’s shrines came from.

“Hmmmmmm…” Shigaraki lets out a prolonged humn. “Alright. But I have my own demands.”

“Name them.” Anaya replies shortly. Izuku is ready to guess that she already got what she wanted from this trip, and was now preparing to pay the price for it.

“Five levels.” Shigaraki replies. “Last five levels are off-limits. If you go there, I’ll kill you. And whether I achieve it or not, the deal’s off.” So, Shigaraki was starting with a demand that they knew would be accepted and without any issues.

Makes sense. It should make subsequent deals feel less problematic. And Anaya didn’t know that they knew that such a no-entry zone was customary for Dungeons.

“What?!” Yla, clearly, didn’t know that. And was shocked enough by it to butt in. “That leaves just a single level and…”

“Yla, shut up.” Anaya this time doesn’t bother being nice. The accompanying glare (from both her and Uzar) makes it clear to Yla that she went too far. And she shuts up and ordered, allowing Anaya to return her attention to Shigaraki. “Five levels of a buffer zone is a perfectly understandable concession. However, you’ll keep growing and this means the allowed zone expanding constantly, and many of the visitors might not have the skills needed to estimate how large your domain is. I’d thus like to ask you if it’s possible to leave signs of reaching the limit of the allowed zone, of the type that one without knowledge of magic can easily notice and understand.”

“Fine.” Shigaraki replies through his teeth. Pretending to be annoyed by it? Huh. He shouldn’t be, because they expected that this would happen. “There’ll be a clear sign telling you to go back in the first room of the first level of the buffer zone.” Anaya nods. “Second demand: My domain is mine. However, the area surrounding it also belongs to me. No one has been living there before me, so it belonged to no one. And now it’s mine.” He squints at the elder. “No moving in and no exploring without my permission. You visit me like you have been thus far, without changing your route. Unless it was blocked by something.”

There is a short-lived frown on Anaya’s face before she speaks. “The authority of Dungeons outside of their domain is rarely accepted.” Shigaraki frowns back at her. “However, as you said, no one lives in this valley, nor anywhere close to it. I could agree to that, but I’d like to establish a limit to your authority. Three days of walking from your entrance.”

That was far from being a well-defined boundary, then again, there was likely no civilization within at least a few more days of walk. They didn’t need to make it well-defined.

“What about uninhabited areas outside of the three day-distance?” Shigaraki asks.

“You’re free to explore them, but so are we and everyone else.” Anaya replies. Yeah, that was to be expected, but it was still best to specify it.

“Alright then.” Shigaraki replies before tilting his head a little and giving the elder a really unsettling, few seconds long stare. “How often will you be bringing me your tribute?”

“Once a month.” Anaya replies. “The bigger the value of things we get from you, the larger the tribute. We’re also open to requests, at least within reason.”

“Fine.” Shigaraki agrees. “But there is one more thing. Without it, no deal.”

Huh? What was it about? Izuku can’t think about anything more than they could ask the beastkin for.

“And what would that be?” Anaya asks, suddenly on guard. Even Uzar’s grip on his sword seemed to grow a bit tighter. Having someone issue an ultimatum to you does that to people.

“One of you was and is annoying.” Shigaraki replies. “Badmouthed me in my own domain. Raised her voice on me in this talk. I don’t like their attitude. So, I want it.” He adds while pointing his finger at Yla. “As recompense. And a sign of good will.”

… what are you doing, Shigaraki?

“W…what?!” Yla shouts while taking a step back. “You can’t be serious! You can’t have me !”

“Huh?” Shigaraki blinks at her. “Why would I want you? You’re annoying. I want your gear for my servants.”

Really?

“Wh… I’m not giving you anything!” Yla shouts back. Izuku enjoyed seeing her like this, but he would never admit it aloud. She really was annoying. But he couldn’t actually hope that this would lead anywhere, right?

“My, oh my.” Anaya says while covering her mouth and pretending to be shocked. “What a shocking twist of fate, Yla. I remember the other elders ordering you to, if the Dungeon was real, do your best to establish a positive relation with it. And yet, you’re here. Acting against those orders. And sabotaging the deal that we’ve almost managed to strike.”

Oh. There was a method to Shigaraki’s madness. He couldn’t hope to force the issue with Yla for a simple reason of not having a shot at defeating her. However, he didn’t need to - because both Uzar and Anaya had a score to settle with her.

And, when given a chance to ruin her day while staying true to both the letter and the spirit of whatever orders they received, they immediately jumped at the occasion.

“Orders said nothing about giving my property to the Dungeon!” Yla shouts back. “You’re going too far, Anaya! When Yzor learns of it, he’ll…”

“I vaguely remember Yzor saying something about giving the Dungeon everything that it asks for to settle the deal.” Anaya shakes her head. “Such a regretful and dishonorable behavior from you. I’m sure he’ll love to hear how the person he made to join this mission was the very reason why it failed. And so will the other elders.”

“You… you…” Yla is downright trembling in fury right now. Izuku is ready to guess that if she could win the fight, she’d attack Uzar and Anaya right her and now.

But instead, she starts unbuckling her leather armor while glaring absolute murder at all three people in front of her.

***

Shortly after, the three beastkin begin their return journey.

Elder Anaya in a great mood. Warrior Uzar in an equally great mood. And Yla in only her underwear, clearly on the verge of promising bloody murder to everyone around her, except knowing well enough that if she goes too far, she might still not return from this Dungeon trip.

I can’t believe that you’ve done that.

lmao

She deserved that

and we’ve got a decent looking leather armor for Toga and any future rogue we’ll get so all is good

Before leaving, Anaya had some additional questions for Shigaraki. She wanted to know how they obtained the shrines of Luna and Occasa, and how one of their servants got the [Bloodrage] theurgy.

Instead of answering her properly, Shigaraki decided to play annoyed. He only mentioned that some invaders tried to attack him but got wiped out to the last. That was all that Anaya got out of him. He just told them that he was tired of this talk and wanted them all to leave now.

Peak manchild behaviour, if someone were to ask Izuku.

The beastkin now knew that there was a cult of either Rampant Bloom or the Shadowlight Covenant in the area, which might be useful in the future (or not). As for telling them to leave, it seemed to reinforce their ‘natural’ look of a semi-wild, newborn Dungeon.

Great.

There was a problem though.

Weren’t you supposed to ask them how they obtained the corpses that they’re giving us?

I was

But if I did so, then you’d know if they are heinous irredeemable criminals or not

Royal Road is the home of this novel. Visit there to read the original and support the author.

and you’d sleep better at night

Which is why I haven’t asked.

Sigh.

I don’t even know why I’m surprised by that.

kek

This is what you get by giving me control over our diplomacy with the locals.

Why did you even do that

why did you even think that I’m the right person for it lol

That’s simple.

Six Level dungeons should be barely sapient, mentally underdeveloped and, generally speaking, act like total manchildren without any capacity for deeper thought..

You were clearly the right person for the job.

I

you son of a… wonderful woman that hasn’t done a single thing wrong in her entire life and yet has been punished with such a son as you.

……….

You’re slowly getting… well, maybe not ‘good’ but at least ‘not horribly bad’ in your attempts to insult me.

Don’t worry, you’ll eventually get a good one.

After all, even a broken clock shows the right time twice a day.

***

With Anaya and her sidekicks on their way to the surface (in order to tell their sidekicks to leave them the tribute/recompense for this ‘invasion’), they had a little while to quickly resummon their servants.

Which emptied their supply of mana, unfortunately. It would recover soon, but for now they simply couldn’t join the others.

“Well, as a person that has just died…” Yaoyorozu says the moment she and others reappear in the throne room. “... I can say that I’m not a big fan of dying. Even if I think that being the Dungeon servant suppresses our feeling of pain to some degree, it was still the most unpleasant thing I’ve gone through. Ever.”

“I’ll do you one better, first I died of a poison and then I choked to death on my own blood.” Monoma shivers. “What a pain in the…”

“Ochako-chan! Ochako-chan!” Toga squeals loudly as she leaps at Ochako and wraps her arms around Uraraka’s waist, kneeling right in front of her. “You were so, so pretty when you almost killed that wolfguy!”

“E-eh?” Uraraka blinks down at her as she - perhaps on instinct - lets her hands rest on Toga’s shoulders. “I did? I barely remember that part, aside from being super angry and…”

You used [Bloodrage], somehow.

Leapt at Uzar, and when he sliced your spear in half, you grabbed the front half of it and almost pierced his eye with the spear point.

He looked genuinely freaked out at how close he got to dying or becoming half-blind.

But, errr, activating the theurgy has also made a lot of blood just… materialize above your head and drop on you, making you very, very bloody.

“Oh.” Uraraka mumbles. She must have realized how the implied amount of blood had to influence Himiko. “Okay? Well, I’m glad that it worked out and that I didn’t kill anyone that wasn’t here to kill us all. Although, it’s cool that Bloodrage’s so powerful, you know?”

“True.” Yaoyorozu agrees with her while clearly doing her best not to look in the direction of Toga. “However, they still pretty much walked through us without putting in much effort, and for as much as I do not enjoy the concept of fighting people to death, this defeat stings.”

“This fight was super manly, though!” Kirishima says, pumped up as hell. “Uzar is super strong! Man, I’m looking forward to getting strong enough to be able to fight him like an equal.”

Toga ignores everything and starts rubbing her head into Ochako’s belly, still on her knees and clearly enjoying the very act of being right next to her crush. And while purring, the volume of which was steadily raising.

Izuku can see a very complicated tangle of thoughts and emotions on Ochako’s face, and he is reasonably certain that Himiko’s the reason for that.

“And yet I still choked to death.” Monoma sighs. He was really focused on that particular issue, although honestly, Izuku can’t blame him.

He, like most of the others, are clearly doing their best to ignore whatever was happening between Himiko and Ochako. Izuku can’t blame them, honestly. It had to be pretty awkward.

“And I got stabbed or slashed like twenty times because someone was having a moment.” Spinner complains. He… actually interacted casually with the former hero students? That was surprising. “I get that said someone’s dream came true, and that it wasn’t a ‘you lose you die for real’ thing, but I still hope that this won’t happen again.”

That earns him nods of agreement from Yaoyorozu and Monoma.

“Uhm, Izuku?” Uraraka asks while finally giving in and starting to pet Himiko’s head a bit. Which, of course, brought even louder purrs. “Did you give the… idea that I mentioned some thought? You know which one.”

I did, Ochako.

And, as your best friend (and more), I believe that it’s my duty to tell you that I believe that the idea in question was brought up as a result of you thinking with the wrong part of your body.

S-sorry for putting it that way, but, you know, I’m trying to be honest.

“No need to apologize, Izuku.” Uraraka sighs. “It’s what friends, and more, do. Tell each other things that they don’t want to hear but should, because it’s the truth.”

Yeah.

I agree that she is funny and that it’s hard to not have a good time with her and her antics around.

But I think that jumping into a relationship so quickly after she stopped acting stabby, and right after we’ve had the talk about giving ourselves some time to figure out what we should do about speaks, once again, of thinking with the wrong part of body.

We barely even know her, to be honest.

“Right, right.” Ochako sighs once more. She knew that Izuku was speaking the truth, and even if it was the truth that she wasn’t comfortable with, that was only a reason to cherish him more for being honest for her sake.

“Hmmm?” Toga stops rubbing her head into her stomach and looks up. “What was it about, Ochako-chan?”

“Oh, me and Izuku were just talking about… something.” Uraraka replies, dodging the subject. “You know, you never told me why exactly you’re into the two of us.”

At this point, the others have relocated a bit further from them, exchanging their thoughts about the recent battle while giving those two some space.

“That’s simple!” Toga says while standing up to face her crush. “I’ve seen him on the recording from Hosu and then you in that spooky forest. You were both tired, exhausted, battered, bloody and so… free! Not hiding anything, not pretending to be someone, going all out and fighting with your life on the line. That was sooo cute!”

That was… errr… mildly disturbing.

“And why do you think that this is cute?” Uraraka asks, having decided to take the advantage of this moment to maybe learn a bit more about her. Worst case scenario, she might get an idea on how to delicately refuse her advances.

“Because you were yourself.” Toga replies with a dreamy look on her face. “Blood is cute, and I always thought that, but it was more about not hiding who you are. You might have been scared and injured, but you were still giving your best! And you didn’t mind the way you looked. Cute!”

Himiko, excuse me for asking it that way, but…

Were you made to hide who you are?

His hunch is immediately proved correct. In an instant, she is no longer comfortable with the talk.

“Y-yeah.” She nods while avoiding Ochako’s eyes. “My parents said that my quirk is bad and wrong, and that I’m a monster. Brought me to a doctor who kept telling me the same thing, just in nicer words. Over and over again. When I had enough pretending that I’m someone I wasn’t, I was finally free. But also a villain. And then everyone hated me and wanted me to put me in a prison.”

Ochako’s eyes open wide. That was… how could someone treat another person like that?! And their own child, too? She can’t even imagine her own parents treating her like this!

Himiko, did they send you to a quirk suppression therapy?

“Uh-huh.” Toga nods while looking down. “That’s how it was called, yeah.”

Oh.

That… that explains a lot.

“Does it?” Uraraka blurts out. Where was this talk even heading to? “What’s that? I never heard of it.”

A form of therapy that helps people with dangerous quirks.

“Helps people with dangerous quirks?” Toga raises her head suddenly while squinting at Ochako. “You think that my quirk was dangerous and that the therapy could help me?”

Ochako is about to try to answer that (while being fully aware that Himiko’s crush on them both was currently at stake), but Izuku ends up speaking first. In the most straightforward and honest way that he could.

So, in the classic Izuku way.

No, Himiko. Because unless there’s something about your quirk that you didn’t tell us about, you didn’t qualify for the quirk suppression therapy at all.

Either your therapist was incredibly bad at their job or your parents bribed them.

QST is supposed to help prevent instinctive or accidental usages of quirks that carry risks of accidental collateral damage.

Mustard would have qualified, as his quirk, when used, can knock everyone in the vicinity. So, if he had problems with controlling it, he’d have to go through the QST to make sure that he wouldn’t accidentally unleash a poison cloud in a crowded mall because he sneezed too strongly.

Or, say, do that on an airplane and knock out everyone aboard, including the pilot.

You simply didn’t qualify.

And your parents shouldn’t tell you that you’re a monster for being born with a wrong quirk.

No parent should tell that to their children.

Hearing Izuku summarize what Himiko has clearly gone through made Uraraka realize that something had to be done. And so she did something - namely, hugged Himiko.

“I’m so sorry for how they treated you.” She says. From her position she can’t exactly see it, but the look on Himiko’s face makes it clear that she was practically melting in front of her. “You didn’t deserve any of that and I understand now why you joined the League. I’d probably do the same thing in your place.”

None of them miss the sound of Himiko sniffing. Someone was clearly on the verge of crying.

Ugh.

We just made her be even more in love with us, didn’t we?

“Definitely.” Uraraka replies before sighing, all while still hugging Toga. “Have you changed your mind about the subject? I get the feeling that we now understand her and what led to her doing you-know-what much better.”

To her, it was like a dam was broken. The dam of, in this case, rational thinking. She now knew why Himiko had a crush on them… and she all but forgave her for the stabbing attempts. What she went through…

No one should have gone through something like that. And Uraraka could now forgive her for certain stabby things that happened between them in the past.

Forgive but not forget. Then again, Himiko seemed to be significantly less stabby and significantly more stable.

It takes Izuku a while to form the reply.

To be honest with you, I think that my biggest issue with that was the way she acted in the past and the fact that she was a villain.

Now I know why she became a villain. And unless she is lying to us (unlikely, considering her past behavior), she didn’t decide to become a villain. She was pushed into becoming one.

And I suspect that the way she acted while being a villain had more to do with a nervous breakdown than her own malice.

I’m not against forgiving her for her attempts to stab me, for as long as you forgive her for her attempts to stab you.

My veto is withdrawn, even if I still have some mixed feelings as to how it could play out. I don’t want to hurt her if it doesn’t work out. And making that work might be… difficult, depending on waaaay too many factors for me to think of them all.

There was something else to his answer, something that he was way too embarrassed to admit.

Izuku Midoriya was a teenager. One that has recently discovered that sex existed and that it could exist in his life. And as a result - and with heroics and the threat of people like AFO and Overhaul out of his life - he had the time to be a teenager.

And the very idea of involving Himiko in, well, the relationship gave his teenage imagination ideas. Ones that he refused to entertain if it meant injuring anyone involved, be it emotionally or physically, because he had standards. But right now, it might work..

And this made him think some rather embarrassing thoughts.

“Is that a yes that I hear?” Uraraka asks, Himiko still hugging her.

I think that she deserves to be happy.

Her feline moments are funny, she’s loyal to those close to her (almost too much, really), and I think that she has gotten somewhat better as a person ever since she landed here (likely due to no longer having to deal with being a villain on the run from the society that failed her so much).

As I said, I withdraw my veto.

If you really want it, I’m okay with that too.

You know what, let’s not be like this and be clear about it. She deserves that much.

Yes. Yes, it’s a yes.

“Alright.” Uraraka suddenly breaks the hug before grabbing a completely surprised Toga by her waist and throwing her over her shoulder. “We’re going then!”

As one can expect, this is noticed by everyone else in the room. They suddenly stop talking about the fight and look at them. None of the three people involved in the newborn love triangle actually remembered that they were there.

“We’re w-where?!” Toga stutters barely coherently.

“I’m embracing my new life as a barbarian warrior in a fantasy world, Himiko.” Uraraka replies as a wide grin blossoms on her face and she begins to walk towards the exit of the room. “And since I’m a moral one, I’ll never experience the feeling of bringing a captive beauty to the lair of iniquity known as my bedroom. This will have to do.”

And then she continues to proudly walk towards the exit, just as Toga was processing what just happened - before going beet red while covering her face, probably to not burst into flames in embarrassment.

Or happiness.

Or horniness.

Or all of the above.

Errr.

That’s a bit… faster than what I expected.

But I respect your dedication to getting what you want and getting it now.

You kick ass, Ochako.

“Izuku.” Uraraka replies as she is almost at the door. “You don’t have mana to manifest right now, right?”

Uhm, yeah?

“So instead, you’re not only allowed but actually encouraged to watch.” She replies with a mischievous smile on her face. Somehow making Toga get even redder.

E-Eeep?!

***

“I…” Yaoyorozu blinks as Uraraka and Toga disappear from the room. “... am officially concerned with what just happened and the behavior of those three. I believe that Uraraka-san has just gone a bit too native.”

Judging from the shocked look that Kirishima gave the departing girls before they left, she wasn’t the only one.

Spinner, though, says nothing. It was just a matter of time. Even his sword of swords that he lost during the Training Camp wouldn’t be large and sharp enough to cut through the concentrated sexual tension that those three were giving off nowadays.

Likely without realizing it. And while he had next to no experience in love, it was clear to him. Which said more about Toga, Uraraka and Midoriya than about him.

“Oh, please.” Monoma rolls his eyes around. “There’s nothing to be concerned about. What you’ve just witnessed was a somewhat sheltered and kind girl that was freed from the rules of her family and teachers and was allowed to live on their own, leading to her having something akin to a teenage rebellion. A tale as old as time.”

“Are you being serious?” Yaoyorozu replies, glancing at him with clear surprise written on her face. “I expected you to be much more vocal about it than I was.”

“Nah.” Monoma shakes his head. “Look, you 1-A guys suck even at your teenage rebellions. Uraraka-san didn’t become a villain, she didn’t start peddling drugs or posting her nudes or feet pics on the internet. Her ‘teenage rebellion’ involves getting a boyfriend and a girlfriend. With everything being fully consensual and based on the blossoming love between them. I’m ready to bet my liver that in the morning they’ll freak out that they’ve done something this embarrassing in public before starting to plan their lifelong relationship that they’re all aiming for. Truly, the most extreme case of teenage rebellion in the history of Mankind!”

The last sentence he says in a classic dramatic way of Neito Monoma, throwing his hands up while looking at the ceiling, as if he was entertaining the gods themselves and wanted to see whether they’re approving of the spectacle.

Yaoyorozu’s only reaction is to blink at him, which prompts a disappointed groan from Monoma.

“Look, give me a call when they’ll start doing something actually bad.” He then says. “Like, snorting cocaine off Toga’s exposed belly. Or just snorting cocaine. Or trading cocaine. Or spreading the concept of pineapple pizza to this universe. In the meantime, I’m going to spend my time constructively and go talk with Komori-san to ask her how she’s doing after the battle.”

“You sound weirdly experienced when talking about teenage rebellions.” Kirishima comments as Yaoyorozu was still staring at Monoma in shock, earning himself an exhausted stare from Monoma.

“1-A doesn’t have a monopoly on interesting people, Kirishima-kun.” He then says, his voice tainted with pure existential horror. “You have no idea about the things I’ve seen or heard. But this will change once more of my classmates will get here. And then, you’ll understand.”

And then he leaves.

Yaoyorozu keeps staring at him in shock until he disappears from the room, before deciding that she should probably do something constructive (just as he said) and go read a book.