As her vision returned she saw Leonidas kneeling next to her. “You with us Jeanne?” he asked her.
“Still … still figuring that out, honestly,” she said with a slur. She opened and closed her eyes independent from the other. She saw Cid lean over her, blocking out some of the sun. “Thank you,” she said slowly.
“You’re welcome,” he said, “that was quite a show you put on.”
“Was that a compliment or sarcasm? I having a hard time telling right now.”
“I’d say more former than the latter in this case.”
“I’ll take it.”
“Can you stand?”
“I could use some help,” she said, straining as she tried lifting herself from the ground.
Both Leonidas and Cid helped Jeanne to her feet, and after a moment of swaying she could steady herself enough to stand on her own. She turned to a large scorch mark that had burned the ground nearby. “Did I do that?” she asked hesitantly.
“You did,” Cid answered. “And turned Guthrum into a crisp corpse.”
“Oh … wow,” she said.
“You feeling all right?” Leonidas asked. “Normally you’re more eager about this.”
“I just relived a lot of things I’d rather not remember, Doc,” she said. “And I wasn’t wanting any of you to know how that went down.”
“That’s more than fair enough,” Leonidas replied.
“Where are the others?” Jeanne asked looking around.
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“Kel, Ben, and Gabriel are helping Silas bury his family and the dwarf while the others are getting the barn ready for us to rest for the night,” Cid replied.
“Silas is letting us rest here?” Jeanne asked.
“He figured it’s the least he can do for us getting the man who killed his family,” Cid replied.
“I’ll thank the Shepherd for small favors,” Jeanne said as she gradually made her way to the barn.
When it was Jeanne’s turn at watch for the night, she sat with her back leaning against the barn door. She looked up at the silver moon as it shone brighter than it had in many a night since she and the others had been hunting the two brothers down. She heard the soft footsteps approaching her, already recognizing who it was before she looked up.
The Stranger sat next to her, leaning his crooked staff on his left shoulder. “That was an interesting way to improvise getting him to reveal his location.”
“Yeah, I’m so thrilled,” Jeanne said unenthusiastically.
“You don’t think so?”
“I wanted to finish this damned exercise in masochism. I wasn’t trying to put myself at the center of the situation.”
“One could get the impression you were?”
“None of the others killed his youngest brother. And those who know what I did, didn’t know the details.”
“You don’t sound proud with what you did.”
“I’m not,” she said shamefully.
“Most would find pride in punishing their sister’s killer.”
“I used to think that too. But it didn’t really make much of a difference. He was dead, yes, but it didn’t bring Sabine back, it didn’t get rid of the other Kolvilles. It didn’t stop whatever mess turned out coming out to bring this land into the chaos it’s in now. It’s like it didn’t do anything but give me a bloodlust that wasn’t mine to take. And now all I feel is shame. Just … shame.”
“Why shame?”
“Because I know Sabine would never speak to me again if she knew what I had done. I wouldn’t be surprised if the others started treating me the same after what they heard.”
“I wouldn’t be so hard on yourself, though I think you learned something important.”
“What’s that?” Jeanne asked.
“Though many would see the two as mostly one and the same. There is a fine, but distinct line between justice and vengeance.”
“And how does that relate to me?”
“Because you took care of the two brothers for what they did to others, not you. There was no personal aspect at play, though there used to be. No vindictiveness, no subjective bias. They’ve been attacking other people, and they needed to be stopped. Simple as that. And understanding that difference is crucial for what you will need to face.”
“Well that’s good to know,” Jeanne said. She turned to see The Stranger gone from where he was sitting. “Yeah, that’s what I figured.”