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PRLG 5: Despair

I would lose her in a year, and I knew it, but I could not stop myself. We bonded quickly, and for the following days, we ate together, visited the fiends covertly, and escaped into the writing rooms after Dean's lectures. I told her about myself and how this was the only life I had ever known. I unloaded onto her the unsaid dreams and stories I wanted to tell Nines.

On the other hand, she was a survivor of a bandit raid. Her father died of a parasite, and her mother followed months later while still pregnant with her. Because of the magical ward mothers automatically produced during pregnancy, Locness showed no signs of infection. The village elders then raised her until the day the bandits arrived.

When Firsday came along, a roaring flame exploded from a range to my far right—it slammed against the range's end before swerving left and right in search of more space. The other students and I all panicked and rushed out—

DEAN

Locness, control your flames!

Locness? That was her? By the gods. We all stood by, and I grinned ear to ear as Dean struggled to put out her flames that crackled throughout the range. None of us would have imagined Locness to be so powerful—I peered around at the solemn and surprised expressions on the other student's faces.

The next day, we lingered around the fourth floor, talking in front of a cage of hell-horses—black fur horses that were constantly on fire. Yet, they generated no heat as Locness stroked the neck of the nearest one.

LOCNESS

What do you think happened to the other kids?

PAIN

The kids you were with that failed learning Fire? Dead or sold into slavery.

She whipped around on me,

LOCNESS

That is not funny.

I was not trying to be funny, but part of me was... lost? Perhaps I was losing my mind and becoming numb to the death and disappearance of fellow students.

PAIN

So, before learning Fire?

She explained how Cain and other Fire Kingdom soldiers scanned abandoned children and gave special ones, including Locness, Spell Book: Fire.

LOCNESS

They took us back to their camp, and there was this device. It was magic and stuff—I have no clue how to describe it, but when it scanned me, Cain started laughing.

PAIN

Laughing?

She shook her head,

LOCNESS

A creepy laugh.

She stated with a smile.

PAIN

Cain the Executioner.

She kept quiet and scratched the mane of the hell-horse.

PAIN

Did you see why he was called the Executioner?

She nodded somberly.

She refused to acknowledge how unsettling this place was and kept looking for the good in everything, despite my efforts to prove her otherwise. She had never been sent to the Fathers, and I explained to her about the Fathers and how they punished us. How nobles treated us like expandable soldiers, and the lack of clerical treatment we would get if we were to fall gravely ill.

I was explaining to her how Dean seemed to know things and pretend not to,

PAIN

Once, I got into a fight with Delve and his buddies—

LOCNESS

You lost?

PAIN

No,

I sang.

PAIN

Beat them up pretty badly, leaving them barely conscious in the writing rooms.

We were hiding within the barracks during lunch, laying in my bed and shooting puffs of fire from our hands into the air. The air was still tainted with smoke coming from Delve's bed from two nights ago.

PAIN

And I knew that Dean knew that it was my doing.

LOCNESS

But he did nothing?

She figured, and I shrugged.

PAIN

Sometimes he does. Sometimes he sends me off to the Fathers,

I eyed one of my wrists—the cut barely visible.

PAIN

Sometimes he aids my injuries.

I mumbled.

PAIN

Forcing me to continue with this hell.

LOCNESS

Why?

PAIN

Hmm? Why what?

LOCNESS

Why did you try to kill yourself?

She slid her hands over my wrists, quickly figuring me out. I turned away from her and thought about the times I had lost close friends.

PAIN

Every year, someone I am fond of disappears.

She scooted closer to me and interlocked her fingers into mine.

LOCNESS

So, you think I am next?

I nodded,

PAIN

And I am tired of it. I do not want to lose you too... I am tired of losing friends, I am tired of hearing about the deaths of other students, and I am tired of Dean signaling me out and sending me to the Fathers.

LOCNESS

But you skimp out and visit the fourth floor instead.

I locked eyes with her, and she continued.

LOCNESS

Dean knows everything, right? Maybe he knows about that too.

She insinuated with a confident grin.

PAIN

You constantly find the good side to these sorts of things.

She laughed as she snuggled into me, asking me her favorite question,

LOCNESS

If you were king—

And I would eagerly spout off fantasies and dreams I would love to accomplish. Locness had always found a way to make me smile and forget where I was.

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Other students were annoyed and jealous of her because she joined this class at eleven—she had to be the oldest to join. But annoyed and jealous as they were, none would mess with her because they would have to answer to me if they did. That was why Delve's bed was burnt the way it was. They knew I was the strongest here but also knew better than to face me head-on. Delve was close, but luckily, he was more of a coward than anything.

PAIN

What would you do if you were queen?

She laughed and stared at the molding ceiling above us,

LOCNESS

Nothing.

She looked at me, and I noticed she looked sad for the first time since I met her.

LOCNESS

Queens do not do anything.

I frowned back at her solemness,

PAIN

Not if you were my queen.

She grinned and gave me that cute giggle I adored.

Not only did we snuck away during the second meal of the day, we accidentally fell asleep in my bed and were awakened by—

DEAN

Pain!

We fumbled awake, and Dean yanked me out of bed—the bastard was still strong despite my growing size.

He forced me to my feet and pushed me into the arms of Father, Cleric Bernard. Out of all the Fathers, this bastard again?

DEAN

You too, wench!

He shoved Locness onward, and we were both taken to the Repentance. Bernard took me away, while another Father, who was still a Mage noted by his purple sash of the Mage, Father Powers, tended to Locness.

I was not at all worried about my punishment. I took the beating with an ounce of pleasure while my mind nearly shattered with worry for Locness. Since Nines was never sent to the Fathers, I had never felt such jealousy before.

After my beating, I rushed out to meet with Locness and stopped suddenly at the sight of her,

PAIN

You okay?

She glared at me but said nothing as we were escorted back into our classrooms.

As if I could write with such anger building up within me, what in damnation did Powers do to her? I kept eyeing her, but she never looked back at me. I could tell she was not whipped as she sat comfortably at her desk. I clenched my jaws at the thought of the other punishment.

Finally, we whisked away to the writing room, and rushing off to follow, I nearly collided with her.

PAIN

What happened? Are you okay?

She pursed her lips,

LOCNESS

You lied to me.

She uttered, and I frowned,

PAIN

About?

LOCNESS

The Fathers,

She grabbed a book off the bookshelf.

LOCNESS

Where were the beatings and whippings?

I was confused,

PAIN

What did Powers do?

She took a seat, and I sat next to her.

LOCNESS

He just talked to me!

She scoffed. I frowned, my mouth agape... what? She shoved me softly,

LOCNESS

Gave me a tirade and told me to stop being your friend less I get into more trouble... beatings and whips…

She laughed and opened the book.

Something was wrong, and as the year went on, I ceased any negative conversation with Locness. She was too innocent for this place, and something secretive was happening behind my back with Dean and the Fathers regarding Locness.

The difference between Dean's treatment of her and the other students caught my attention. I noticed Dean did not treat her with as much malice as he did the rest of the students. Was he purposely trying to make the other students hate her? If he was, it worked. Other students despised her for being upbeat and were shocked at my positive attitude toward Dean. I was even surprised at my attitude towards him, but I only did it to please Locness.

Our playful and intimate relationship would only get us scolded by Dean, but at other times, he would turn a blind eye. One time during Spring, Locness accidentally fell asleep in my bed, failing to return to hers. But when morning came, and we jumped on the line, Dean eyed us and said nothing.

For months on end, I was happy. I was obedient. But as the year came to an end, I was worried. I had a horrible feeling that I was about to lose her as a new year approached.

We were in the middle of Dean's lectures when Cain stomped in,

CAIN

Noble's orders.

He stated bluntly, and the entire class appeared affected by the sting of those two words.

CAIN

Out to collect arachnid webbing. Earth Kingdom prices went up for the webbing.

Cain spun around as Dean stepped down.

DEAN

I was informed Scribes would no longer be used for such dangerous tasks.

Cain turned back,

CAIN

Said who?

DEAN

Noble Dah Challa, when I was acting as Master upon your departure.

CAIN

He changed his mind.

He fired off and took his leave.

Shortly after that, we were hauled away in prison wagons. These wagons looked adorned from the outside, but inside, they were stained with dried blood, dirt, and at other times, feces. The wagon had no windows or visible slits, allowing us no view of the capital as we were hauled miles south of the Kingdom's capital and dropped off at the border of a thick dying forest.

LOCNESS

Is this what you meant? Expendables?

She spoke to me in a trembling whisper, and I nodded,

PAIN

Stay by my side.

Despite my hatred for Dean, unlike other instructors who would put students' lives at risk, Dean would do just a bit more to protect us. Just a bit... but as we looked around, there were no other classes, just us and Master Cain, who took to the skies upon a floating spiral of flames.

And so, we sloshed into the dying forest. Minutes after we passed the bunch of spiny dead trees, we were attacked by animals—snakes, wolves, and feral cats and fiends—stolas and mandrakes. Chaos ensued as the mandrake's thick roots began to shoot out from the ground, spitting up the class as we fought off our enemies.

A heavy cat leaped onto my side, and I blasted Fire at it. But it had knocked me over, and I tumbled down a slope and into a sheet of webbing. Noticing that my fate was not sealed and I did not adhere to it, I grabbed at the web and rolled it into a ball as quickly as possible. A sound caught my ears, and I spun around and set a charging wolf on fire.

As it yipped off in pain, I looked up—smoke was engulfing the forest—damned noble sends a bunch of ill-trained Fire-casting Mages into dangerous woods. A roar of devastating flames caught my attention—only one person had better flames than I, and I rushed over to Loc—

—it was Dean, having just incinerated the mandrake's bulb—or the heart of the mandrake, ceasing the movement of roots beneath our feet.

We briefly shared a look before a screech of numerous voices echoed in the distance to our right—arachnids!

DEAN

Get back to the border! We are leaving!

He formed a condensed orb of flames and unleashed it toward the arachnids while I took off, searching for any signs of Locness.

I ran through the thicket of the woods and into the thorns of the dying trees. I gripped the bundle of dried arachnid webbing at my chest, feeling my heart beating like a festival drum—where was she? I detoured slightly in hopes of finding her.

My thin brown woven clothing offered no defense against the branches scratching at me and the leaves slapping at my face. I collided with other scribes sprinting up a dirt path riddled with tree roots and snapping plants—ankle biters—that bit at our ankles.

DEAN

Keep moving!

Despite his urgency, I stopped at the sound of Locness screaming for help, her leg tangled in thick arachnid webbing wrapped around a tree trunk. A few feet from her were a bundle of dried webbing—notable only because I figured she was carrying it. Relief washed over me—I just needed to get her out of that.

I rushed to her feet and grabbed at the webbing but was knocked aside by Dean before I could lay hands on it.

DEAN

Do not touch it, you idiot! Move!

PAIN

No!

Dean grabbed me by the neck, and I was thrown several meters toward the rest of the class that made it to the top of the slope.

I coughed painfully as I tumbled back to my feet and looked back at Dean, casting a stream of fireballs at the young arachnids with a free hand, keeping them at bay. His other hand engulfed Locness' foot in flames, and she screamed in pain.

The ground shook, and the trees behind Dean began to bend and shuffle—

CAIN

Instructor Dean!

His voice bellowed like thunder, but I did not bother looking for Cain. To my dismay, I witnessed Dean turn tail on the arachnids and grab the bundle of webbing Locness had dropped.

PAIN

No!

I ran back, but Dean wrecked me in the stomach with his fist, lifting me slightly. I doubled over to the ground as I watched several grown arachnids—massive fiends resembling overgrown spiders covered in hard chitin, approach the forest's edge. The leading one, without hesitation, stabbed its sharp limbs into the back of Locness—a deafening screech ripped into my ears, and I screamed in pain.

DEAN

Fire!

He yelled.

My fellow students behind me unleashed streams of fire upon the arachnids—the sound of flames seemed to echo the deafening scream—a scream that will continue to reverberate in my head for days to come.