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The Boy With A Dozen Souls
EP 46: Pain of Loss

EP 46: Pain of Loss

PAIN OF LOSS

The day-long journey back to the city was unbearable and miserable. Drago was the only positive one, touting how lucky we were to survive. But midway on our travels, when we took to rest, his positive spirits crumbled in the dark of the night. I awoke to accidentally catch him sobbing while on watch. I needed to take a piss but forced myself to hold it in and pretended to be asleep.

The day had begun to pass, and the sunlight was welcoming because relying on my Petty Night Vision was exhausting. With the city just a few more meters ahead, I tightened my grip around Panuka's waist and whispered in her ear.

HILROY

Almost there,

She nodded solemnly. She hadn't said much since we fled. I figured she was still processing what happened between her sobbing sessions and staring off into the void. On the other hand, Mantis was angry... at who or what? I had no idea. Never in my life have I ever wanted him to crack a joke or say something humorous. Just something to break this atmosphere of death.

DRAGO

Home free, ya?

He mumbled from ahead of us.

DRAGO

Ya'll need to stop looking dead.

He stated sternly.

DRAGO

That goes for ya'll two as well.

He uttered toward Tempest and Bolin.

BOLIN

Still can't...

He whispered.

DRAGO

Stop it, ya fuck! Ain't the first time we lost a member.

TEMPEST

...first time we lost two.

Tempest interjected,

TEMPEST

And Grey—

DRAGO

He was new, ya, I get it. But he lost his only partner before joining us. What would ya do if I had died, hmm?

Tempest and Bolin kept quiet while exchanging looks.

DRAGO

Ya fucking bastards... if I ever die. Ya better not quit being adventurers. Death is what makes us strong. Those feelings we get when we lose someone close. Use it, ya hear! The dissatisfaction of being weak! The Law of Growth doesn't lie—whatever doesn't kill ya will make ya stronger.

We stepped onto the road and followed it toward the west gate. I spotted movement at the entrance—a group of adventurers? Drago pulled up to my side,

DRAGO

Sorry to be cuck, but ya'll really need to stop sulking.

PANUKA

It's not that easy—

She started, but Drago cut her off.

DRAGO

Oh? How many of your team members died? Ya haven't heard a peep out of Farengar, so stop whining!

HILROY

Hey—

DRAGO

And you!

He barked at me.

DRAGO

Don't say a fucking word, aye?

I glared back at him—he wanted me to do what? Let these adventurers limber off toward their deaths without warning?

DRAGO

We lost two groups of people on an escort quest.

He growled at my facial expression.

DRAGO

Ya from Sante June, right? First time ya lost the people ya escorting? We can't just claim that Ire came out and killed them.

He looked ahead and took a deep breath.

DRAGO

Ya could say we a different breed than ya fuckers from up north. When adventurers lose, we keep it to ourselves. It saves face. Once enough adventurers lose life to the same damn thing—whether it be fiends, bandits, outlaws, or even the damn trees, rumors will spread.

HILROY

So you want us to reasonably pretend we didn't lose a wagon of children?

I asked, but he shook his head.

DRAGO

Just don't spread it proudly. If they ask, and they will ask, just tell the truth and move on. There is no pride in losing.

I looked ahead and made eye contact with a familiar adventurer, Lia. He was the first party of adventurers we met when we arrived in the city weeks ago. He had approached us and attempted to recruit us into his party at that time. But when we declined, he took it as an insult.

It didn't matter because he and his group had been absent from the city until now. When we first met, he had a party of fourteen, but looking at his group now, it had to be over twenty-five people. How the hell are they splitting any puries?

Lia looked my way and sneered.

DRAGO

He seems to know you—ya'll got hate?

HILROY

Ignore him.

DRAGO

Oh, so you do.

We did, and if it had been any other adventurer, keeping my mouth wouldn't have been so easy.

We passed the first set of gates, presented our adventurers' badges to the guards, and were ushered to the second set of gates.

OTIS

Weren't you lot on an escort quest?

One of the guards spoke to us and caught me off guard. My mouth fell open, but I couldn't find the words—

DRAGO

Sure was.

He stated boldly.

DRAGO

We ran into Ire, the high bounty wench.

Otis cocked his head,

OTIS

Really!?

DRAGO

Ya, we had a great loss, and if ya don't mind...

Otis took the hint and nodded as Drago led us into the city.

DRAGO

We should go and see...

He stopped, and I followed his gaze ahead to two uniquely dressed individuals eyeing us. They wore loose purple robes over black straight pants. A black sash ran diagonally across their torso and bore the adventurer guild's golden insignia—an octagon harp with an "A" drawn through it.

DRAGO

Well, that was quick.

The one with stripes of different shades of red down his body bowed solemnly and rested his rosy pink eyes on us.

ASSESSOR KAY

You may call me Assessor Kay,

With his arms crossed, the other had a black cross pattern on his orange face, tilted his bald head, and attempted to look down at us with his dark orange eyes... does he know we're on horses?

ASSESSOR BINKS

And you may call me Assessor Binks. Follow us, please.

Drago led the way, and after spotting Panuka's worried expression,

DRAGO

Ya, of course, this will be ya first collateral,

He started softly,

DRAGO

Don't fret about it.

Tempest and Bolin pulled up to our right,

TEMPEST

Ya, this is just procedure.

BOLIN

Back home, it usually takes 'em hours to track us down.

I pursed my lips and nodded while wondering how many lives have they lost. I looked ahead at Farengar, who sat in reverse on his horse's hind, facing us and his back to his only remaining partner. His eyes were closed, but throughout our journey back, I saw not a hint of sadness or despair coming from those two. Maybe I had it wrong, perhaps it wasn't the fear of danger... maybe this pain of loss is what it means to be an adventurer.

We arrived at the barren guild office. Only two other parties lounged outside the office as we tied the horses down to hitching rails near the back of the office. Inside, renovations were being done as the Guild acquired the two homes to the right of it.

The Guild now had a few chairs and tables, posters along the wall, and an array of floral decorations throughout the office.

ASSESSOR BINKS

Sit here,

He ordered, and we took a seat around a small wooden table.

ASSESSOR BINKS

Try not to tell anyone for now.

We sat silently for a moment before Drago began to hum to himself.

DRAGO

Hey Farengar,

He uttered, and all our heads turned to listen in,

DRAGO

Want to join my group? We could use a Mage.

TEMPEST

Hey, what about me?

But Drago puckered his lips at him,

DRAGO

Farengar is already a Mage; besides, ya wanted to be a Lancer. Now you can.

TEMPEST

Well... that's if he joins, Farengar?

Farengar shrugged, his eyes glued down at the bare table.

FARENGAR

Sure, why not. Guthix? Tagging along?

Guthix, the other remaining member of Mokoto's party, shrugged and croaked,

GUTHIX

Na, I'ma head back to Earth Kingdom after this. Mind if I keep the party's name?

Farengar shook his head,

FARENGAR

All yours.

Drago beamed and then faced me with a wide grin.

HILROY

Don't even ask.

DRAGO

A shame. We could use your luck.

I figured he was talking about how my party came out unscathed.

HILROY

I don't know if it was luck, a miracle.... or logical probability.

DRAGO

Yea, likely.

Since we were talking, I decided to ask,

HILROY

Tempest, what was that light?

TEMPEST

Oh, that?

He sat up with a wry grin,

TEMPEST

A battle item. It's common in the Earth Kingdom, but at the same time, it is not so common... If ya get what I'm saying. Ya met Rosa, right?

I nodded.

TEMPEST

Similar to her flasks and vials but a hundred times more potent and dangerous.

DRAGO

And very expensive.

Drago added punctually.

DRAGO

What was that one, aye? Seven hundred puries? Though we had to use it on that fucking hag back there. Did ya know I caught sight of her Shadow Phasing into the ground? What a monster!

HILROY

How did you know that would work?

I asked blankly, and Drago grinned smugly.

DRAGO

Our run-in with Necromancers, aye.

TEMPEST

A crap ton back home,

Tempest added.

TEMPEST

But the lot of them are madly insane, ya know, from practicing necromancy. Shadow Phase fails in light and doesn't work well. The battle item I threw was called a Light Bomb—can really blind the mana out of ya and burn the crap out of ya skin if ya too close.

Assessor Binks returned with a bundle of rolled parchments and a black coin purse. Before uttering a word, he tilted his head and looked down at us.

ASSESSOR BINKS

Hilroy? Is it?

I was about to stand, but he gestured for me to stay seated.

ASSESSOR BINKS

This is your first collateral, according to our records. As per Clause 4 Section 2 of the Adventurer's Contract, you are forgiven for your first collateral and paid in full.

HILROY

What?

I spat, feeling both disgusted and sick at the same time. Was there really something like that in the contract? Did I miss it? I searched the Adventurer's Contract, scanning the document in my mind—

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ASSESSOR BINKS

You look distraught.

HILROY

Of course! I can't take Biggs and Wedge's money—

ASSESSOR BINKS

Clause 1 Section 5, you must accept all payments from the Guild.

He informed me with a hint of annoyance in his voice,

ASSESSOR BINKS

If you do not want the pay, you can throw it a beggar after you accept it.

DRAGO

Or give it to me,

He laughed.

I glared at him, and he zipped his mouth. My eyes fell on Panuka, who nodded uncertainly.

PANUKA

We need the money.

She shrugged.

PANUKA

Even if it feels wrong.

I looked over a Mantis.

HILROY

You okay with this?

Mantis grimaced while staring at the table,

MANTIS

If we ever do any more escort quests, we need to make them know the danger.

DRAGO

That's the spirit.

Assessor Binks handed me the coin purse and then presented the quest for me to press my thumb against the soul stamp. I felt the tingling sensation of the quest leaving my mind. Assessor Binks quickly rolled the parchment and then moved on to Drago.

ASSESSOR BINKS

As for you, Drago, this is your third collateral this year—

DRAGO

Ya, I get it. I'm suspended from escort quests for a year and have a cut on all future quests for some time, blah, blah, blah. I'm just so unlucky, ya know.

Assessor Binks squinted at him as he allowed him to press his finger on the soul stamp.

ASSESSOR BINKS

I would beg to differ—

The office front doors slammed open, and Bigg's wife, Helga, came at us in a fit of tears.

HELGA

Murders!

She shrilled, her long green hair stuck to her damp blue face, spotted with triangular green patterns. A guard quickly took hold of her, but she fought against him, screaming and kicking against the guard. Behind her, blocked at the door, were the parents of the students, each sobbing and slandering our names.

HELGA

These bastards killed my husband! Give me back my money—

The guard took her to the floor, and my party and I stood—

GUARD

Stop it!

He shouted.

Assessor Binks approached Helga. And again, he tilted his head back as he looked down at her.

ASSESSOR BINKS

Escort Quest Contract states in the first paragraph that if the escortee were to die under any outside circumstances before the completion of the escort quest, twenty percent of the escortee payment would be forfeited to the Guild.

I clenched my jaws at the sight of Assessor Binks heartlessly turning his back on Helga.

ASSESSOR BINKS

Escort them out.

As the guards obeyed and forced them out, he strode past me,

ASSESSOR BINKS

Don't give me that look,

He growled.

ASSESSOR BINKS

Welcome to the Adventurer's Guild.

*****

The morning had merely begun, and I was leaving the Great Galley with Kendo and my personal Guardians at my side when I ran into Cinda.

CINDA

Chief, Master Donatello wishes to meet with you whenever you have the time.

I nodded,

LEON

Thank you, Cinda.

She whipped around and promptly returned to the Great Hall. I stopped before my father's statue and let out a sigh.

LEON

I'm sorry—

GATE

Sire!

I jerked my head toward my new General of the city dressed in a full suit of Iron Puri +1. A three-foot-tall Iron Puri Kite Shield +1 was strapped to his left arm, and his old sword dangled in its scabbard at his waist.

LEON

What is it?

I asked, as I nearly skipped to him. He removed his helm and revealed his frizzled, short gold and red hair, deep red pupils, and bright yellow skin spotted with short, thin red vertical lines.

GATE

Oh, no, sorry to worry you, Chief, just a bit of news.

He led the way toward the Great Hall as we spoke.

GATE

There was a fight in the wilds involving a few of Cain's soldiers.

LEON

Was there really?

GATE

Cain informed me personally before he left while touting that kicking him out would be a mistake.

LEON

He's quite full of himself, isn't he? But who were his soldiers fighting?

He gave me a side-eyed glance,

GATE

Take a guess.

LEON

Ire Farcatcher?

And Gate nodded.

GATE

Allegedly.

LEON

And what of Cain?

GATE

Gone. They departed through the north gate but continued north instead of taking the past east.

LEON

We'll have to keep an eye on them. Was that it?

Gate nodded, and a brief silence flew between us.

GATE

Our inspiring young soldiers are making progress. But we are in dire need of a Cleric.

LEON

I am working on it. How is the armor?

He lifted a thumbs up.

GATE

A challenging burden that I will overcome.

He proclaimed cheerfully.

We parted ways within the Great Hall. I went to meet Don in the Black Hawk Tower. As always, it was busy and bustling, with Don being the only motionless person before me. He looked up at me from his work and gestured for us to talk on the second floor.

Within the peace of the tower's second floor, Don ordered tea for both of us. I studied his face, searching for a hint of humor, but failed. A wry smile parted his face as he noticed my staring, and he stretched his neck with a long exhale.

LEON

Come on now, what is it?

DONATELLO

Several adventurers took quests leading them south.

Our tea arrived, and I gestured for Don to continue,

DONATELLO

One was one of my own, a sort of stake-and-claim quest—where I purposely made the details of our claim vague. But I digress—three parties went down to the south hills. I assume they all did in search of Ire—I didn't think them to be so stupid.

He took a sip, and I caught his jaws clenching as he uttered,

DONATELLO

According to Krapht, only one party and a half made it back alive.

LEON

Ire Farcatcher again?

Don perked up,

DONATELLO

Again?

LEON

Gate mentioned he had fought Cain's soldiers within the south.

Don placed his tea down, his face riled in confusion.

DONATELLO

Well then, why didn't Cain go after Ire! He now knows where he is, doesn't he?

It hit me like a ton of bricks—that was a good question.

LEON

I... don't know. I should've asked Gate. Gate informed me Cain headed north... of all places.

Don shook his head in frustration and mumbled to himself,

DONATELLO

Maybe this is his doing?

LEON

Doing what? Who is?

DONATELLO

The adventurers that were lost down south. They were on an escort quest. Escorting Biggs, Wedge, and Link.

My face flushed with heat—

DONATELLO

When whosoever attacked them, the adventurers saved their own skin. Biggs, Wedge, Link, and their students are all gone—

LEON

No, no, no—

I quickly set my tea down.

LEON

Biggs and Wedge?

I leaned forward.

LEON

And Link!?

Don attempted to sink into his seat and avoided my eyes as I raised my voice.

DONATELLO

Sire, we have a much dire issue—

LEON

Don't try to change the subject, Don! We lost all of our great craftergents in one night!

I exclaimed, my eyes searching Don's pupils for a sudden answer to fix all of this... nothing.

LEON

Everything was going so well!

I shouted, rising out of my chair.

DONATELLO

Sire, we can simply contract Adventurer—

LEON

Oh—yes! More Adventurer's Guild this and Adventurer's Guild that! Don! We lost our people to this ridiculous Guild of yours!

I bellowed, pacing around my chair.

LEON

Care about them, for Jokul's sake!

I grabbed and tugged at my hair as I squatted and groaned.

LEON

The wall! The stone wall is not even completed, Don! Oh, by the gods! Why? Who is going to fini—

Kendo and Cinda attempted to leave,

LEON

Get back here!

I raised to my feet.

DONATELLO

Sire, this is unsightly.

LEON

I don't care! Who will finish the wall and complete the order of forty-four tailored suits of armor for our selfless army? Answer me, Don! The Adventurer's Guild!? North Star!? North Star will take the entire city as payment!

I ran my fingers through my hair and took a breath of frustration. Why? Why does shit always have to go wrong?

DONATELLO

Sire, we are already scouting the city for individuals who will take up the craft.

LEON

Found anyone?

I spat, slightly annoyed at his calm demeanor, and he shook his head. He should be asking for forgiveness for such a ridiculous blunder. But I guess he may never see me as the Chief since I was once his student.

I breathed through my nose and reclaimed my seat,

LEON

Krapht told me about that Hero, the one out east.

DONATELLO

Do you want to contract a hero? They are reasonably expensive. More expensive—

LEON

I need to contract that Hero and pay whatever they demand.

DONATELLO

But, sire—

LEON

I need to get rid of whatever is down there, Don! My people are not safe with such a threat leisurely lurking on our southern edge. I would have immediately disbanded the Adventurer's Guild within our city, but I know damn well that will not rid us of Adventurers.

DONATELLO

But I do not think it is Ire, sire.

I was taken aback and ogled him blankly.

LEON

What? What could it be, then?

DONATELLO

Cain, sire.

LEON

Cain? Who already left to go north?

Don raised his hands in an attempt to calm me... I leaned back in my chair and stopped my legs from bouncing.

LEON

Okay, go on.

DONATELLO

Cain, the Executioner, do you know what he does for the Fire Kingdom and why he received that title?

Refusing to feel beneath him, I racked my brain with determination and remembered,

LEON

He was sent to quell bandits and rebels.

DONATELLO

Exactly, but along with that, he was rumored to find any bandit leader or rebel leader and execute them on the spot.

LEON

So...?

DONATELLO

Cain came looking for this gent Ire right after two vampire incidents. We mistook it to be Layondo. Cain then searched the northern roads where Isaac was ambushed. Then, the southern wilds, where our guards mentioned a vampire, fled by jumping into the ravine. Cain, the Executioner, found nothing. Cain also asked us to bow our hands to the Fire King. And now, he is heading north?

He awaited my response, but I took time to digest what he was implying. Cain, a gent titled to be able to find and execute any rebel leader that ran amok within the Fire Kingdom, is now having difficulty finding Ire Farcatcher.

LEON

Be that as it may, I need to contact that Hero.

DONATELLO

But sire, that is a great gamble.

LEON

No different than believing this was Cain's doing all along.

*****

I was bombarding the sealed door across the ravine. Fire, Fyre, Earth, Stone, Water, Telekinesis, and Willpower. Nothing worked. The day was long and dull. I had already trained for hours and could create sandstone pillars using Stone. It still drained a chunk of mana, but I was alright with that.

I let out a long sigh, giving up on the door and returning to the Chamber. I cast Fyre and created a small orange sphere of scorching flames. The heat was still unbearable, yet I continued to put off training my Petty Fire Resistance...

I sighed,

PAIN

It is so painful to train that.

And even if I wanted to continue my training, Recall Memory distracted me by attempting to find a way to break through the sealed door. What was I missing? I then began to look around the Chamber, wondering if there was something—anything, that I had overlooked.

Inside the library, I saw not a grain of dust that I missed, and it was the same with the Oval Room—now filled with ruby and sapphire puries. I searched the coffins for clues inside the Arachnid Lair, where my black and forest arachnids rested.

I then looked ahead at the dirt stairwell leading out of my lair. Remembering the Obsidian Gem +1 and the fact that I had to touch the body of kinans to Lek's sapling, a new range of ideas came to mind. Maybe I should start rubbing things against the ward.

I returned to my room, retrieved the Obsidian Gem +1, and floated to the sealed door.

PAIN

First, the gem.

I positioned the gem into my fingers and pressed it against the sealed doors. The ward rippled like water, and the Obsidian Gem +1 became stuck. Dammit! I tugged at the gem, but it was immobile. The ward rippled again, gaining speed after each wave. The gem, completely stuck, was now sinking, tainting the translucent barrier with a spreading black stain.

The ward expanded, and I floated back across the ravine. I looked up the ravine in awe as the spherical ward emerged from the ravine's walls before dissolving into nothingness.

PAIN

Did that work?

I asked myself in disbelief.

I floated over to the door and carefully placed my hand against it. The ward was gone, and the door creaked open. From inside, an ominous wave of dark mana energy crashed into me, but I stood solid against it and welcomed the challenge that bore its fangs at me. With a soft smile parting my lips, I strolled into the unknown.