For the first time in a while, there were no pressing matters that couldn’t be put off. Levelling up at least once to get to level 20 in his class, continuing to work on Kol manipulation and training with Ayo were all very much things he had to continue working on, but the proverbial saucepan had been taken off the stove. For now at least.

That was why Jem lay in bed snuggling into the covers while playing with his bloodline orb, with zero guilt. Nessa had forbidden him from making any actual changes in the short term, and Jem had listened but that didn’t stop him from playing around with it. Some changes were relatively simple, like making his entire body larger or smaller, but other things like recreating feet were less so. One thing that stood out was all the little inefficiencies in his body. Like a nerve that for some reason ducked under his aorta, instead of just going straight to his throat.

Sometime later he’d have to pour over some anatomy textbooks but for now, his thoughts were free to drift back to Sebastian. Ahh Sebby Blackthorn. In the time since the ball, Jem had spent plenty of time thinking about the man. His smile, the dimples, the way he’d tilted Jem’s chin. But Jem had also attempted to ruthlessly smother those thoughts in their cradle, that was until now. There had been more important things to do and focus on and Jem wasn’t about to get himself killed because he was too busy thinking about a boy.

– – – – – –

Jem went into the bathroom for the third time in ten minutes and mussed his hair. Does this look like I'm trying too hard?

He was wearing smart but casual clothes and had a pair of horn ornaments on. He wasn’t sure if they were too much or not. Jem took them off and replaced them with a less opulent pair. Silver and dappled by a few small gems, rather than the gold pair which had been entirely encrusted. Though even that pair was less ornate than what the rest of the family had worn to the ball.

Jem shook his head. It’s fine. It’s going to go fine.

Jem hurried out of his bathroom and made his way to the library. Whether it was just a convenient place to meet or if Sebastian had chosen it for Jem’s benefit he wasn’t sure.

Sebastian was already in the library. When Jem arrived he was sitting in one of the carrels with a book in one hand and a pen in another, his back towards the door. Jem just stood there observing him for a while. I’ll totally go over there in a second. I’m not nervous.

Sebastian’s oversized tweed blazer was folded over the back of his chair, a necessity in the warm library which had revealed his white linen shirt. The shirt was cut off by a pair of high-waisted brown trousers, just a shade or two lighter than his skin. He was like something straight out of a dark-academia pinterest board.

Jem knew he looked fine, but his look definitely wasn’t that well put together.

Sebastian looked over his shoulder. “I heard you come in.”

Jem felt his face flush. “Ah, sorry. I didn’t want to disturb you.”

“I’m sure.” Sebastian offered an easy smile. “Do you mind waiting a minute or two? There was just a little more I wanted to do before I left?”

“Oh yeah. Sure. That's fine.” Jem smiled back. “I’ll just wait over there.”

Jem pointed over to the fiction section of the library. He hadn’t had a proper chance to look at any fiction, and while he hadn’t exactly been an avid reader back home, it wasn’t unusual for him to listen to audiobooks while walking around. He sort of missed it.

The fiction section was smaller than the others. It made sense, but it was still a little bit disappointing. Jem walked over to one of the terminals. Haywood still hadn’t taught him how to use them, so instead Jem reached down and grabbed the wooden board from the slot on the side.

It held an overhead view of the library and each bookshelf was labelled in small print. Jem looked over the fiction section. A few of the normal things were there: Romance, Mystery and Thrillers. But there were also other sections like Non-Elcan Protagonists and Dead Worlds. They felt more like descriptors of the contents but Jem supposed that it sort of made sense. Maybe dead world fiction was sort of like Fantasy but the other way around.

He wasn’t too sure.

Jem walked over to the Dead World section. It wouldn’t hurt to take a peek. He reached out to one of the bookshelves and grabbed an old, worn book. Clockwork Edifice: Rise of the Belching Titan.

He flipped it open to read the blurb, just inside the front cover, instead of on the back. It probably made sense given it was a cloth-bound book. It painted a picture of a world of war and strife, powered by coal and steam. It sounded cool, if a little depressing.

Jem looked through a few more books, and they painted a similarly wartorn picture. Though it ranged from wars fought with sticks to something resembling modern-day Earth. He didn’t really see anything that resembled science fiction. Jem grinned. Maybe if I’m ever short on money I could ‘borrow’ some ideas.

“Find anything you like?”

Jem jumped and fumbled the book he was holding. “They looked interesting, but they didn’t seem all that realistic, every single one seemed to paint dead worlds as war-torn and entirely miserable.”

A crooked grin came over Sebastian’s face. “Ah, so you noticed. They’re all obsessed with painting dead worlds as primitive because here is obviously so much better.”

Okay… subtext.

“So ready for your tour?”

“Absolutely!”

Sebastian clasped Jem’s hand in his and they walked out of the castle.

The faint scent of woodsmoke hung in the air giving the night a sweet smell. It felt magical and admittedly some of that was because he could go out onto a street. In public and maybe attract some looks, but none of them judgemental. He could even look up and see the stars. You couldn’t do that in a city back on Earth. Not an English one anyway.

“So where are we going,” said Jem, in a small voice.

“I have no idea. That’s the fun part.”

They chose a random direction and started to walk. As they went Sebastian pointed out little things. A restaurant where Sebastian had had an awful date. A little museum full of magical music boxes. A little shop he’d stolen sweets from. Jem gave him the side eye for that one.

But Sebastian just laughed. “I was seven, I didn’t know any better.”

They went through the crafter’s quarter. There were lots of tiny shopfronts, many of which you could look through to see significantly larger workrooms at the back. There was everything from carpenters and tailors to alchemists and artificers. Jem wanted to go into all of them, but he refrained. Some were shut, others were busy, but he did go into an alchemist’s shop.

Lots of little potion vials of every colour hung in racks along the walls and each was stoppered with a little glass top. Twine was looped around their necks and connected to little paper labels with almost indecipherable handwriting.

Jem picked up one at random. Love Potion. “What?”

Sebastian leaned forward and read the label. “Oh yeah no, it’s not like mind control or anything. Just your internal chemical balance. More bonding chemicals and happy feelings and the like. Selling an actual Love Potion in the mind control sense would lead to a very bad time for the alchemist.”

“Why would anyone buy it?”

“Normally it’s couples who are having a tough time or parents with postnatal depression.”

“Ahh.” Well, that’s not depressing at all.

Jem looked at a few more of the labels discarding them before he came across another one. Enlargement.

“Hey, do you think this would make me taller?” Jem held the label out to Sebastian so he could get a better look.

Sebastian leaned down and then a couple of seconds later he turned to Jem with a smirk on his face and wiggled his eyebrows. “I believe that’s a different kind of enlargement potion, but I’m sure we could test it out later if you–”

Jem smacked his hand over Sebastian’s mouth and then groaned. “How was I supposed to know what that was? God. Why don’t any of these have clear labelling.”

Sebastian pulled Jem’s hand away from his mouth, looking far too smug. “You know I can’t answer your questions if you try to shut me up like that. But to answer your question, this is an alchemist’s shop, if you want a clear answer you’d have to speak to them. I don’t want to stereotype but most alchemists are a bit in love with their work and only make most of these potions–” Sebastian gestured around “–so they can afford to research new ones.”

“So they just don’t care?”

“Exactly.”

“Shall we continue our tour then?” asked Jem.

“We absolutely can, but we could try asking the alchemist if they have a potion that does what you were looking for.”

As it turned out the alchemist did have a potion that could increase Jem’s height. She also had a sprayable potion that Jem could put on his clothes to make sure they didn’t rip apart when he grew in size. He flushed when he realised he’d completely forgotten to consider that aspect.

When they got out onto the street Jem got Sebastian to spray down his clothes and then Jem downed the size potion. According to the alchemist, it would last at least a few hours.

Jem felt a wave of vertigo with the perspective shift. By the time it was done, he was just below eye level with Sebastian. “Oh wow, this is much better.”

“Oh yes. Much.” Sebastian leaned in and gave Jem a chaste kiss on the cheek. “It would have been a pain to do that if you were shorter.”

Jem felt a flush rise up through his body and he covered his face with his hands.

“Did I tell you? You’re cute when you’re flustered.”

This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.

Jem let out a strangled squawk. I think. I think I want to die.

Sebastian reached over and grabbed at Jem’s hands trying to draw them away from his face. But it took him a couple of attempts.

“Huh, you’re stronger than I expected.” Confusion was written across Sebastian’s face. “Well, shall we find somewhere to eat?”

“That sounds great.”

Sebastian asked if Jem had any specific preferences and when he didn’t Sebastian said he knew just the place. On arrival, the staff recognised him instantly.

“Lord Blackthorn would you like your usual table?”

“That would be marvellous, thank you Hope.” Hope led them through the kitchens, up a few flights of stairs and out onto a private terrace.

“I like it up here. The quiet. You can just look up and see the stars,” said Sebastian. He pointed over Jem’s shoulder. “Sometimes there’s a street performer that stands on that corner and you can just relax in private and listen to the music.”

“It is very nice up here.” And it was. It was secluded and cosy but it also felt open. A cool refreshing breeze blew over the top of the crenellated walls and the food smelled marvellous. “Do we go down to order?”

Sebastian shook his head, his antler ornaments chiming softly. “The chefs choose what to make but it's always delicious. Of course, if anyone has any allergies they can ask chefs to keep that away from their food. Though that tends not to be an issue if they have more than 15 vitality. You do have at least 15 vitality right?”

“What? Oh yeah, I have plenty more than that. I’m fine.”

“Oh– Okay.” Sebastian’s eyebrows scrunched slightly. “Well the food should be here soon, we shouldn’t need to make any special requests.”

After that, they lapsed into an easy silence. Jem leaned back into the chair and gazed up at the sky. He hadn’t really thought about it before, but all the constellations he’d recognised were gone. No orion, or his belt. No saucepan err– plow either.

“Hey Sebastian, “said Jem, “do you think you could teach me about the constellations?”

“Mmmm, I could do that. But are you sure you aren’t just using that as an excuse to get close to me?”

Jem let out a loud sigh. “It’s fine I will live on in ignorance.”

Sebastian laughed. “No, no. Come on over here. I can keep my hands to myself.”

“Oh. Oh no I am ever so cold on this frigid night. Whatever shall I do?”

Sebastian took off his blazer and patted the space next to him. Jem sat down next to him and was momentarily surprised when Sebastian got him to put the blazer on and then again when Sebastian pulled Jem in so he was almost sprawled across his lap. Once they were settled, Sebastian leaned in and started pointing out individual stars and the constellations they made up. He kept a firm arm wrapped around Jem’s chest.

A couple of times the star in question was obscured by one of Sebastian’s antlers but Jem didn’t say anything. At that moment Jem felt a deep certainty, for the steady rumble of Sebastian’s voice and the warmth of his embrace Jem would give up a thousand stars. Jem didn’t really have another word for it, he just felt safe, it felt like home.

An idle thought dragged at the back of his mind but he pushed it away after a moment. I am getting attached way too fast.

Eventually, the food came and was laid out in front of them. If Jem was being honest he didn’t really want to move but he heard a rumble from Sebastian’s stomach and pushed himself upright.

It smells too good to go to waste anyway.

In the language of the empire it wasn’t called curry, but in Jem’s head that’s what he thought of it as. It was spicy and there was, a lot of rice. Was his label accurate? No probably not, did Jem care right at that moment? Absolutely not.

“Hey, Jem.” Jem looked up and Sebastian was holding a small ball of curry and rice out in front of his face. Jem hesitated for a moment before tentatively leaning forwards and taking it from Sebastian’s fingertips. The moment the food entered his mouth Jem instantly forgot about everything but the taste of the food in his mouth. It was delicious and all-encompassing, he was certain there was some actual magic involved. Jem savoured the taste and then swallowed.

“Now you have a go Jem.” As instructed Jem reached down to his food and mixed it all together with the fingertips of one hand. He then pushed the rice up into a little ball and held it between his fingertips and thumb before raising it up to Sebastian. When Sebastian’s lips grazed his fingers Jem used his thumb to push the ball in.

Sebastian closed his eyes, seemingly just enjoying the food for a moment. Then he swallowed and opened his eyes. “I come here every week and each and every time I’m surprised by how good it tastes.

“You were also better at that than I expected.”

“My etiquette instructor made me practise,” Jem admitted.

“Ahh that makes sense.”

In silent agreement, both Sebastian and Jem turned back to their food and dug in.

They stayed together on the roof terrace, back to gazing at the stars before Sebastian suggested they started to move again.

“I know exactly where to finish up your tour for the night.”

No Jem it will not be his bed chambers. “So where did you have in mind?”

“Where else, somewhere we can dance.”

Sebastian led them to what was definitely a nightclub. I wonder what m&m are doing right now. It felt bittersweet but he was sure he could make some new, some good memories.

Sebastian got them inside with little fanfare. It seemed as though security recognised him. Maybe he’s a regular?

“Wait here, I’ll get us a couple of drinks.”

While Sebastian was away Jem took the opportunity to look around. His first instinct was that it was a straight club but he quickly realised that that he was being silly it wasn’t a distinction he’d seen made on Dari, or at least in the empire. There were all sorts of couples. Straight ones, of course, but also pairs of men and pairs of women. There were also at least two throuples. One of which he recognised and intended to stay far away from.

Shortly after Jem’d spotted the throuple Sebastian returned, two drinks in each hand. Jem gave him a quizzical expression.

“I wasn’t sure what you wanted so I figured I’d get a few different things for you to try.”

Jem hadn’t really drunk much alcohol since arriving on Dari. Before obtaining his class he hadn’t had the chance and afterwards, he hadn’t seen much point in it given his immunity to the alcohol’s effects. That didn’t stop him from taking a sip from each glass and taking his favourite of the four.

“This one tastes really good.”

Sebastian nodded. “That one’s my favourite too.”

“Oh.” Jem thrust the glass back at him. “You should have it, I’d also be happy with any of the others.”

“Okay, well, why don’t we just share that one and then we can race each other to drink the rest.”

Jem smirked at him. “Now Mr Blackthorn, if I didn’t know any better I’d swear you were trying to get me drunk.”

He looked off to the side for a moment. “You just looked a bit sad when we came in so I hoped to take your mind off it.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Jem shook his head. “Anyway, what if your plan had failed? What if I was a crying drunk?” Jem reached forwards and drained one of the less desirable drinks.

Sebastian scrunched up his face in disbelief. “Somehow I doubt that.”

“Yep, you’re right.” Jem’s hand shot forward and drained another glass. His immunity to alcohol meant there was no problem with doing so. Even if I had a problem in the past.

Sebastian downed the other undesirable drink. “Eugh that one was worse than I remembered.”

“Yeaah, it was pretty foul.”

“Anyway, shall we finish this one and then dance?”

“Why Mr Blackthorn you surely are a veritable well of good ideas today.”

The two of them passed the glass back and forth taking little sips. It became a little game to drink from the exact same spot. Like the prelude to a kiss. By the end of the glass they were both grinning stupidly at each other and Sebastian had wrapped an arm around Jem.

“Let’s find a place to put these glasses down.”

They took the glasses back to the bar and then stepped out onto the dance floor just as a new song began. It wasn’t a particularly great song for dancing together but they made the attempt anyway, but about halfway through it became Sebastian singing along to the lyrics that everyone else seemed to know, and Jem attempting to sing along to the lyrics.

They were terrible, but it was great fun.

The next two songs were similar, but the third started slow and they adopted a more classical approach to dancing. As the song continued its tempo slowly increased and Jem felt each beat of the music accelerate in step with his beating heart. He found himself looking at Sebastian’s lips. Would it be bad to lean forward and kiss him right now? Jem was just about to when Sebastian spoke.

“You’ve levelled up your class a lot since I last saw you.”

Jem thought back to what Aoife and Nessa had told him, ‘don’t lie but don't give away too much either.’ “I may have levelled up a little I suppose.”

By now they were both moving at a blitzing pace, but the song was still building. It was far faster than he could have moved before coming to Dari. Though admittedly far slower than he had under the effect of Haywood’s haste spell, that thing was insane.

Jem felt the familiar tingle of an identify wash through him.

“How are you only level 19? You shouldn’t be able to move this fast with your class.”

“Well, evidently I am moving this fast.” Jem grinned.

The music was coming to a crescendo.

“Do you have any magical enhancements currently engaged?”

“I’d prefer not to talk about any of the spell effects I’m under, or about my class.”

A look of horror flashed across Sebastian’s face and he whispered, “No.”

“I was right.

"You didn’t qualify for the class, you’ve got a different class.

"They took you in because they felt bad.”

Jem felt like he was watching a trainwreck through a telescope. “I–”

“I’m sorry Jem, I really like you, but I can’t do this with you.”

Why does he look like he wants to cry? That makes it so much worse.

The song came to an end and Sebastian stepped back.

“I can’t be with someone who’s destined to die. I can’t do that again.”

Sebastian wrenched his hands from Jem’s and fled.

“Wait–” Jem tried to call out, but by the time he had Sebastian was already gone.

Once again Jem was frozen on the dancefloor after speaking to Sebastian Blackthorn.

Getting drunk would be really great right now.

Jem stumbled out of the club, his brain like a puddle in a hailstorm. At some point, he thought someone might have asked if he was okay but he didn’t remember what he said.

But everything was going perfectly. How did it all go wrong so fast?

Jem mentally retraced the night. The moments of concern and confusion on Sebastian's face. Jem had written them off a the time. Was he thinking I was about to die the whole time? Losing someone has to suck, but I'm not the same person.

Jem repressed a fresh wave of tears that threatened to tear out. I'm not going to die. Jem balled his hands into fists. I'm not going to die. Then he let out a single sob.

God why am I such a mess right now?

Jem pulled the blazer tight around himself. Sebby’s blazer.

He half wanted to rip it to pieces in an act of tweed murder and half wanted to cry into the sleeve but one thing was for sure Sebastian ‘that absolute wanker’ Blackthorn had forfeited all rights to it. He had no right to view him as destined to die. I am not going to fucking die Sebastian.

On his way back to the castle the height-increasing potion ran out. And Jem shrunk back down to size. The blazer hung off him like he was just a coat hanger.

He felt about as emotionally capable as one. Maybe murder would cheer him up, but no the only person he was angry with was Seb, and that wouldn’t be remotely cathartic. Murdering Haywood, that could be justified? Sadly, revenge fantasy wasn’t really doing it for him either.

When he got back to his room Aoife was already inside.

“How did it–”

She must have seen the look on his face because she cut her sentence off and just held her arms out instead.

Jem fell into it. Aoife’s hug felt safe and warm. Maybe there was some magic involved but he couldn’t bring himself to care if there was. It wasn’t enough though. It reminded him of how Sebastian's hug had felt and Jem pulled himself away.

“I’m tired, I just want to sleep,” Jem mumbled.

“Oh. Okay sweetie,” said Aoife. ”I’ll also let Ayo know that you won’t be around for training tomorrow.”

Aoife opened the door.

“Thank you,” said Jem.

Aoife closed the door behind herself and Jem waited.

About twenty seconds later he let out a high-pitched yell. “Arrgh.”

He punched his bed. Once. Twice. And then three times before he collapsed down onto it and started to cry.

You’re being stupid and overdramatic.

Maybe I am a crying drunk after all. Yeah, the skill must have malfunctioned. This is just the alcohol.