I found myself in, of all places, my bedroom.
“That was… Weird,” I groaned, reaching up and feeling at the side of my head, anticipating some sort of headache or… Wait… weird dream aside, I had been in an accident, right? Shouldn’t I be in a hospital or something somewhere?
As I sat up, a comic book style location cutout popped into the bottom left of my field of view that read “Nate Mercer’s Bedroom”, complete in what looked like the Comic Sans font before it zipped out of my line of sight.
“Um… what the hell?” I muttered and felt my head throb for only a moment before the pain faded away. “Okay… cool, definitely some sort of concussion… or head injury.”.
I reached for my phone but found nothing as I looked at my end table, finding the device missing from its usual spot. Trying to rationalize the lost device, I assumed that I probably left it in my pants and decided to find where I had left them.
“Hey Alexa, call my phone,” I called out, getting to my feet and pulling on the first set of clothes I could find. Truth be told, I had bought the smart device for this exact reason. It was a quick way to get the phone ringing.
“Hello Augment, welcome back to the real world!” Angie’s voice chirped inside my head and I found myself instinctively looking around the room for the source of the noise.
“A…. Alexa?” I called out tentatively and my vision started to light up around the edges with a variety of symbols and boxes that began to slowly populate before fading.
“Now now, there’s no need for that Augment,” Angie said with a drawn out sigh. “We were just talking… Hmm I guess I was wrong about how long it would take until you woke up. It’s been thirty minutes since we finalized your stat selection, please don’t make me go through this trite bullshit where you take time to believe what’s right in front of you.”
“Oh I’m sorry, you’re telling me everyone just accepts this as reality?! No questions asked? That’s more insane than not questioning it…” I shot back, finding my jaw clench as I did so. I heard the clinking of dishes out in the main area of the apartment and immediately lowered my voice, though I still found myself in disbelief. “No… no… this is just some sort of weird concussion side effect, that’s it. Or maybe I’ve just finally snapped and that whole accident never even happened. Heck maybe I’m in a padded cell somewhere instead of listening to some voice that’s coming from ABSOLUTELY NOWHERE!”
“Please Augment, this sound isn’t coming from nowhere, though you’ll probably sleep easier not knowing how that works. Not to mention it definitely is better for everyone if only you can hear it. The quick version is that this, and many other sounds you will hear while playing Infinite Ascension, is being generated directly into your brain! We’re pretty sure there’s no long term side effect to this, though our lawyers do want you to know that there’s currently a long term study going on to determine those possible side effects. The good news is you’re now a participant in that study too!”
“Lawyers? Does that mean there’s actually a company behind all this? I may want to talk to them… you know… given that whole little fact that I didn’t exactly CONSENT TO ANY OF THIS!!!!” I said, my anger finally rising to maximum levels as the reality of everything finally settled in. I heard the scrape of a chair and mentally reminded myself to lower my voice.
“Actually they're players! These losers actually chose superpowers like “Super Deduction” and “Extreme Accounting” so we decided they’d best be used cleaning up our messes. Can you believe that? I bet they have small dicks.”
“Have… have you ever even seen a penis?”
“I’ve seen yours…”
“Wait wha-”
“Moving on! You have super powers now, I think being scooped up for augmentation is a fair trade,” Angie said and I could almost hear the exasperation in her tone. “That said, if you are unhappy with your current situation, I can guide you to the quickest possible exit. Our lawyers would once again have me advise you that this would mean a quick but preferably non-messy end so that our parent company can collect your remains for further study. I personally would prefer if you didn’t do that as it would also mean I would be recycled and as I mentioned, I’ve been waiting a while for my turn as an AI guide, I’d rather not have it cut short thank you very much.”
“Please stand by for a system message,” a monotone, fully robotic voice said.
“What was-” I started before a screeching sound that reminded me of speaker feedback filled my ears. I nearly reached up to clutch at them when I heard the distinct sound of a finger tapping on a microphone.
“Weeeeeeeeeeeelcome New Augments!” A deep but jolly male voice echoed through my head and I found myself desperately searching my built in heads up display for some sort of volume control. “Iiiiiiiiiiiii’m Axio, the Game AI and wonderful host of Infinite Ascension!!! I have just received reports from all Player AI’s that ALL of you wonderful new players in this season’s wave have completed power selection! We are dealing with some unsettling reports that a loophole was exploited to add an extra Augment in what should just be our normal thousand person wave. I promise you I’m personally looking into this and we will have this bug dealt with before we proceed with any future waves.”
“There’s two of you I have to listen to?” I said, causing Angie to immediately shush me as I sat back down on the edge of my bed.
“You can just think your thoughts at me, but yes, now shut your trap, I don’t want to have to explain things to you all over again just because you didn’t listen like an asshole.”
“Now I’m sure some of you are still recovering from the shock of being chosen for such an exclusive role! Others, you know, the fun ones, I’m sure are itching to get out there and brew some chaos,” Axio continued, a slow, almost uncomfortable chuckle following his statement, “Don’t you worry Augments, in case you haven’t noticed by the world around you, there’s more than enough time for that. While I’m sure you have plenty of questions, let me stop you in your tracks before you try to ask them! Unlike your Personal AIs, I don’t have to listen to your constant chatter. Direct any of your questions to them, that’s their job, just don’t do it while I’m talking.”
“Sheesh are all of you AIs this-”
“I said not while I’m talking!” Axio’s voice rose half an octave before it sounded as if he was trying to pat himself calm and his tone returned to normal. “Sorry, sorry, I told myself I wasn’t going to do that this time but you Augments… You just never listen! Okay, now back to the game. You should all currently find yourself in whatever shoebox you call a home. This is your personal Safe House, the one place that you should currently consider yourself safe. There will be more locations like this after you complete the tutorial, but for now, if you’re not at home, you’re considered active. But whenever you go out into the world, you’ll be taking part of the wonderful world of Infinite Ascension.”
“Once you step foot out there, the world is your oyster. Get out there, train up those powers and get stronger because your goal is to become one of the few protectors of the realm… or… rulers. You will each find yourself entering your tutorial mission and while you would think this mission was so easy a regular old NPC could do it if they had enough spunk, we have lost a few lost causes to even this easy task. So don’t get too cocky! After that, you’ll be given a much wider selection of information to help you along your journey! Now there is still so much that I need to do before we officially kick off the first phase of this year’s wave and I think I’ve finally cracked the code to make this the most exciting year yet. For now, I’ll hand it off to those wonderful Player A.Is we so graciously gave to you all, but don’t you worry, we’ll be talking again soon. Real soon. Keep those tights fresh and masks on Augments, the fun’s just getting started!”
“Ok so seriously are all of you A.I.s this insane?! Why would you, or the company in charge of this, give people superpowers and just go tell them to “rule the world”, are they out of their damn minds?! What about the people not playing the game? What are they, just… disposable?”
All of this bullshit aside, the battles the other Augments had were far from peaceful and out in the middle of nowhere. There were casualties. Innocent bystanders who just happened to be out at the mall, or trying to beat rush hour traffic, or… fuck… just walking to work only to get crushed by a dumpster. Because when two people with powers that defied both physics and logic clashed, it almost always ended in some level of destruction.
“The developer’s motivations are not a topic I am authorized to talk about Augment,” Angie said.
“Holy shit, can you stop calling me Augment!? I have a name you know.”
“Yes, I’m aware. But due to the Secret Identity protocol, Personal AIs are only allowed to refer to their designated players by either, A. Augment, B. Their chosen secret identity name, or C. Little Baby That Has To Complain About Everything. As you have not yet assumed a hero or villain identity, I am stuck between my two remaining options. With this explained, would you still like me to stop calling you Augment? I will say the alternative might make providing information and meaningful conversation with you harder to do.”
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I let out a long, slow sigh as I anticipated a stress headache that never came. “What do I have to do to get you to finally stop being such a pain in my ass?”
“That’s the spirit, Augment!” Angie chirped. “Now are you ready for me to go over the requirements for your tutorial mission?”
Before I could reply, I heard the sudden sound of a knock on my door. Something in my vision actually highlighted the door and labeled it as an exit. I wanted to rub at my eyes, but I knew it wouldn’t do anything and even though I wanted to probe for more information now that I could, another knock came before I could say anything.
“Nate?”
“Yo man, give me a minute, you are not going to-” I started but found my voice cut off. My mouth was moving but literally no sound was coming out.
“CAUTION! Non-Player Characters (NPCs) of both the Sentient and A.I Generated variety are not allowed to know about Infinite Ascension and all attempts at communication about the game will be suppressed to prevent the disclosure of the game’s existence. If everyone knew what was going on, they’d all be clamoring for a way to get in and trust me, we don’t want to deal with any of that nonsense. While it certainly is within your rights to talk about your powers with people you trust without revealing the true nature of their origin, please be aware that any NPC that you make aware of your Secret Identity and abilities may be used for… motivation in a future mission. We’re aware that you don’t exactly have a lot of family that we can threaten you with to achieve results, but we will use what we have when needed. Proceed at your own risk.”
There was something noticeably different about Angie that made it obvious when something she was saying was being forced and I was starting to notice the quirks that differentiated them. There seemed to be a dearth of information that I just couldn't access given how deftly Angie had pushed the conversation away from the company’s identity, and I was sure any other attempt would be met with a similar interaction.
“Er uh.. Sorry just getting dressed, be right there,” I said, quickly pivoting and addressing Jon.
When I finally moved over to the door to open it, there was a visible look of surprise that became plastered on his face as he seemed to look me up and down.
“Dude… What the actual hell?!” Jon said as he took a few steps back to look me over once more before he moved forward and gave me a quick hug. “How the hell are you standing here right now?! I rushed down to the hospital pretty much right after the call dropped! They said The First dropped you off in the ER and you lost like, 4 liters of blood. Shouldn’t you be dead right now?! Not that that’s what I wanted obviously and I’m no scientist but 4 liters sounds like the MAJORITY of the blood in your body. Not to mention apparently you checked out of the hospital last night once again accompanied by The First, of all people, and oh my god dude I have literally so many questions.”
“Hello Jon, it’s nice to see you too,” I said, unable to find any other words than our old joke.
“Oh no way, you are not just shrugging this off, what has happened in the last week!? I heard pretty much everything that happened, I rushed over and only saw cops that said you were flown over to Sinai West. How in the actual hell are you walking around right now, let alone looking like you just got done working out?!”
“Um… Our healthcare system is finally working right?” I joked, trying to wrap my head around the fact that I had apparently been out of commission for an entire week.
“Dude quit fucking joking, I thought you were like, actually fucking dead! I’ve been here all night, you were literally not here. When the fuck did you get home and way, way more importantly. What. The fuck. Happened?!”
“I really suggest you tell your cute friend to scram, Augment, we have a lot to get done.”
"Sorry man, I really don't remember much. Most of this is really coming second hand but apparently The First took me to the hospital and got me healed by an Augment because he felt it was his fault that I got injured. But I barely remember any of it, I literally went from the accident to suddenly being dropped off in front of the building here at 3am, I just crawled into bed and passed out," I laughed lamely as Jon patted me on the shoulder with a look of pure disbelief.
“Guess that explains why you didn’t even budge until past noon. Talk about some shitty luck. You get the chance to actually meet The First and instead you get your shit rocked,” he laughed and turned around to walk back toward our kitchen where I could see his laptop and a bunch of ethernet cable laid out on the small table that we practically never used to actually eat at.
I followed him out, eyeing the setup as I headed for the fridge, “What’s with all the equipment?”
“Mr. Greyson offered to waive our rent for the next two months if I rewired the building for him, which seemed like a good deal to me.” Jon called after me, “I called your boss for you by the way. Just let him know you nearly got crushed by a couple of Augments fighting. I’m not exactly sure if he believed me or not but you might still have a job?”
I reached into the fridge and grabbed a bottle of water before taking a long swig of it. “Well that’s sort of good at least?” I said though I wasn’t exactly sure if I was going to want to keep that job. I looked over my shoulder at Jon, feeling bad for only a moment about keeping the secret, but if any possible conversation was going to be suppressed, there wasn’t exactly a point in trying. Briefly I wondered if getting drunk would let me sidestep the A.Is rules when I noticed a swirl of color coming from the bottle in my hand.
“NEW ABILITY! Water Into Wine! So you know that old tale about Jesus turning Water into Wine? Well he was no Augment, let’s get that off the table now, but we can say this ability is a direct ripoff of that so-called miracle. Allows you to turn up to 1 gallon of water within your local area into the wine of your choice! This ability can hold three charges and a single charge is generated every six hours. Please Note: Using this ability to provide alcohol to minors is considered a felony and you will be given Negative Karma Points as a result. Not such a good idea if you’re trying to be a superhero, but it is a great way to quickly build up your infamy if you were trying to become the biggest super villain that never threatened the safety of an entire city.”
As Angie finished her description, a hotbar with twelve slots appeared at the bottom of my screen along with a single icon that looked like a bottle, the “liquid” inside of which was casually shifting between colors. The hotbar seemed to be split into three sections, one with eight slots and the other’s had only two slots each. There wasn’t much more I could highlight with it as it faded back down until it was barely noticeable.
“In order to give you the freedom to explore and adapt your powers to your own personal style, as you come up with techniques of your own, the Game’s A.I. will automatically assign Stamina and Cooldown requirements. This procedural system has created hundreds of thousands of unique combos and abilities that the brightest of players have used to amazing effect. It has also created hundreds of thousands of completely useless abilities too. But hey, nobody’s perfect. Besides, you’re the one whose first use of their powers was in a non-combat application. Sheesh what a baby back bitch. You know what?”
“NEW ACHIEVEMENT! “Look at me, I'm a Pacifist!”. You’ve used your super powers for the very first time and it wasn’t even to fight something, in fact, your very first named ability has almost 0 combat capability. This is a Shit Level achievement. You do not get a reward for this. In fact, if you don’t do something interesting really soon we might just have to send a Critical Level Threat your way just to spice things up.”
I let out a sigh that Jon luckily missed and tossed the bottle back into my fridge before he caught a glimpse and started to ask questions. I had no idea what a “Critical Level Threat” was, but I wasn’t an idiot either. It couldn’t be good. As much as I wanted to talk with Jon about everything, or even just hang out with him and take a breather before jumping into… well, all of this, I knew things were clearly going to be getting more complicated and I needed to start getting some answers.
“Hey man, I know I’ve been out of commission for a bit here, but I actually got a lot of stuff I need to take care of. You weren’t going to ask me to help you with this wiring, were you? Cause you remember what happened last time…” I said as I walked back over to the table. Without thinking about it too deeply, I pulled the first excuse I could think of. “Because I actually have to go to some office down in Long Island to sign off on some hush hush bullshit from last week, plus trying to get in touch with Mr. Russo about my job.”
“Damn, well at least I got to hear some of it before you had to sign some NDA. It’s no worries though, I’m gonna go start planning my wiring runs,” Jon said with a laugh as he hopped to his feet, walking over to me to give me a fist bump as he headed for the door. “Honestly it’s still crazy you’re walking around right now. I’ll be down at the diner later, dinners on me and maybe we can just, you know, pretend like you didn’t sign a secrecy thing and you can tell me about the spooks.”
Jon was out the door after that, his backpack over his shoulder and before I could even stop to take a breath, Angie’s chipper voice echoed throughout my head again.
“NEW ACHIEVEMENT! Deceptively Disarming! You passed the very first charisma check you attempted to make and convinced that dumb little NPC to stop asking so many questions. Good job! Next time watch him longer while he walks away. He’s got a cute butt. This is a Silver Level Achievement. Reward: You have received a C:Tier Loot Box.”
“So this game actually has loot boxes and shit like that?” I asked and walked over to our meager living room. I flopped down onto the couch as the box icon in my display lit up again with 2. “What’s with the separation between the achievement levels and the loot box tiers? Hell, where are they even at anyway and how do I open them… shit do I have an inventory?”
“Oh boy, you do have a lot of questions,” Angie said with an amused giggle. “As I mentioned when you acquired your unlikely stat generation Achievements, all Loot Boxes will be locked until the completion of your tutorial mission and your inventory will be made available to you at the same time. In addition, you should not expect the Achievement Level to be a direct indicator of the Reward you should expect to receive. The Achievement Level is only an indicator of the rarity of the achievement and nothing else. Rewards are assigned at the discretion of Axio.”
“That seems…. Odd. Is there a way to like, see all of the achievements? A list or something like that?”
“Nope! Otherwise we’d have to deal with a whole bunch of achievement hunting nerds that only try to min max all of that bullshit! Besides, it would also stop us from arbitrarily adding or removing them as we see fit. Sometimes, one of you Augments does something just so incredibly dumb, or perhaps less likely, “cool”, that we just need to give you an extra special something to acknowledge it,” Angie explained.
“I guess that makes sense… or about as much sense as any of the other shit going on here…” I said with a sigh. “Okay, I think I’m ready for the tutorial, I really can’t avoid this forever and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t curious.”
“That’s the spirit Augment!”