There was a long line waiting at the door to Absolute. It was always a long line, because if it were not long, then the line would vary, and that would no longer be an absolute line. Liam despised long lines, but loved Absolute, so he stood in the line as patiently as he could. His best was... passable. As the people moved, the line somehow still managed to remain the same length.

Liam's patience was eventually rewarded and he entered the nightclub. The sound was nearly defeaning, and the throbbing beat inspired gyrations with sinusoidal flourishes across the dance floor. The area serving drinks was below the dance floor with had a reduced sound pressure, which was expected for a lowered bar area.

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A melodic tenor, with quavering undertones spoke from behind Liam, "Watch your asymptote, friend. Choose a better limit or you'll be needing parametric functions."

He turned around, but didn't see anyone else reacting to the lilted warning. Pondering the situation for a moment, he moved to the side of the steps, just as a heavy jagged glass shard arced away from a Jeroboam dropped by drunken revelers above and speared into the steps where he would have been walking had Liam continued on his way.

"Good choice," the odd tenor announced.

"I thought that one would be mine," replied a cavernous echo, inspiring feelings full of impending doom. "No matter, they're all mine in the end..."

When his heart stopped pounding, Liam decided he'd had enough of Absolute for the night already, and headed back to his home, where things were decidedly more average.