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50. Dittsen And Its Attractions

Being A Guide For The Traveler Who Wishes Both To See And To Understand Rather Than The Former Alone

Once disembarked and on the city streets, the travelers remained silent for a time. Most of them. Not Foshkay laGabohnsay's son and daughter, and of course not the very Jalpi Peffu Millim Takki Atsa, all three of whom voiced their opinions without inhibition. The kids thought it was boring. Takki disagreed.

“When our father told us it was marble that first made him interested in Adaban history, we used to giggle and tease him over what a silly thing that was to say. I have to apologize when I get home. Dittsen is . . . It's just so . . . I really don't know what it is.” As much as her appreciation of his people's skill in building and composition cheered Dirant, the effect was blunted by the fact that these were not his people at all, but rather Ottkirs. Only a little though, since he was prepared to accept Ottkirs as Adabans whatever they themselves thought about it.

At last the adult Redrins found something to say. “Yeah, well, I bet they don't have a fun party when a house goes up,” Hugal scoffed.

“There's no way anybody even notices. This city is too impersonal. Pfft.” Eyanya refrained from spitting even as she conveyed the impression she thought Dittsen deserved it.

With that, the spell of intimidation owing to obvious inferiority shattered, as when a Ritualist performs a revocation ritual to prepare yams for immediate sale and undoes the effect which held them safe yet inedible. The Yumins, their confidence restored, began to admire their surroundings with the unaffected glee of the tourist with no other business. Audnauj did as well, though Onzalkarnd for his part always had his duty before him and therefore disliked looking upward.

Audnauj was straining his neck more than he ever had in his life when he said, “Onzalkarnd, why shouldn't we go together to look for a hotel to put up at? There, that's taken care of. Dirant, can I ask you to play tour guide for my people? I know you're not from here exactly, but you can get around well enough, surely.” Audnauj leaned closer to Dirant and lowered his voice. “I'm not saying I think my servants would get into predicaments on their own, but now that I've gotten this far, I am saying that after all. I wish you'd herd them for me. We'll meet up, hm, somewhere.”

“There is a clock tower convenient for the purpose.” Dirant nodded toward it. “At the third chime should be time enough, or?”

“That's just what I was thinking. We're off!” Audnauj strode away, turned back, handed Dirant a purse, “If you end up needing to feed them,” and strode away again. Onzalkarnd tried to look dignified as he followed, a difficult task for a chief attendant who needed to be led around by his master. It was only a slight difference in Adaban proficiency that set them apart, but a proper servant in his view ought never to be Intermediate where his superior was Fluent.

Dirant suspected that he would need to feed them. Moreover, he wanted to. Several shocking conversations during the sea journey revealed, against all his expectations or rather his fundamental conception of human experience, that only a few of his fellow passengers had ever eaten cornbread. His duty then became to rectify that, and the duty of any restaurant within Greater Enloffenkir to assist him.

There were two difficulties, or perhaps one difficulty with two prongs. To him of course, who was back in his normal ensemble and letting his hair grow back, any restaurant was open. To foreigners and children some doors might be closed, more so to the latter in a metropolis used to visits from the wealthy and influential from abroad. However, just as Audnauj had anticipated, Dirant knew a solution.

Immediately he began to pilot his charges away from the upscale district near the harbor. He wanted mid-scale office buildings full of clerks and managers, the sort of middle-to-do family men who wanted a serviceable meal when their cook was visiting relatives or did not exist and often found it in a restaurant that implied itself to be of Chtrebliseuan origin with some name like “The Fiery Pony” or “Hot to Trot.” Such business always allowed children, if they did not provide amusements specifically designed for them. Every major city in Greater Enloffenkir had at least a thousand it seemed, and all were run by families that had left one of the far southern states, perhaps after a poor yam harvest. The dishes they offered blended the culinary inclinations of Chtrebliseu and Adabans understood broadly. That meant the peppers and meat were wrapped up together with pickled vegetables either inside or next to some cornbread. College boys called those establishments border stops, either affectionately or derisively depending on whether they were trying to impress a girl at the time.

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None of his devious calculations prevented Dirant from pointing out what the sights around them probably were after the manner of a proper guide. “That is certainly a collection of rentable offices. Observe how activity is seen up all seven stories, and yet there are windows dark and covered by drapes even on the first and second. Those are facilities awaiting a firm that has money and need of them, you can be sure.

“Over leftward, that long building with the sharp pitch to its roof might resemble the stables of the Redrin lords or a temple beloved by the oligarchs of Drastlif, and so naturally in this country it is a warehouse. Without looking inside I am certain it stores luxuries intended for the well-budgeted which, in inland cities, would be sold in a store staffed by women who smile and are happy to learn the customer's name. Furniture, tapestries, sets of pens with high-quality ink, and so. The Ottkir, excuse me, Adaban possessed of wealth and confidence in his own competence in handling it concludes that such trumpery must necessarily drive up the price and prefers to buy the goods as close to the source as possible. Warehouses of this sort are provided with decorations, chairs, and show areas in the expectation buyers will come there directly. I can assure you the prices there are just as high as they would be elsewhere.

“At this moment we pass a park. The land's value surely would be significant if developed, and so it is all the more generous of the owner to allow the public to enter. Though we cannot see it from the street, there is a statue within commemorating some worthy of the town, a person famous and respected who is fit to be a model for youth grasping at virtue and who happens to be an ancestor of the owner. The park bears the name of that favorite local son or daughter as well. I know all this despite arriving for the first time in Dittsen this very day.”

The audience overall did not find his lectures captivating, although one of the Yumin servants had a notebook out, his glasses on, and an interested look. Yunay laDornsal's actual title remained obscure to Dirant, but his job involved checking to make sure vendors did not take too much advantage of Lord Audnauj. Under-steward? Senior Price Double-Checker? The rest of the crowd preferred to examine parks thoroughly over having them subjected to university cynicism. Dirant acceded to their wishes, and all enjoyed their trip along a walkway that wound under shade trees in a spiral that terminated at a statue of a man whose grim expression showed him to be a responsible handler of weighty matters, unlike the frivolous politicians of today.

Dirant, a consummate guide already, knew something to say about that as well. “Doubtless the marigold is his family's particular flower and was chosen to surround his monument for that reason. Ottkir lineages often select family flowers for themselves, and some other households around Greater Enloffenkir have adopted the fashion.”

Takki raised her hand. “But the Rikeltas went with an animal instead. Right, Ressi?”

“Evidently so. I wonder, if our patriarch sold Stadeskosken, whether he would insist as a condition of the sale that the name and otter logo be preserved.”

The travelers spiraled their way back out of the park and proceeded into a less ritzy part of town with less marble, more brick, and increased modesty shown by its spires. Dirant found what he wanted before he even asked the first passerby who looked like he sat for hours at a time for a recommendation. A place called “Belgsavdoi” according to the Chtrebliseu-like vertical banner posted beside the door attracted his attention.

“I have two questions,” Hugal said when Dirant made clear his intention for them to eat there.

“I'll take one of them,” Eyanya volunteered. “What kind of name is that for an eatery? “Stouts'?” Where's the noun? Why is it dual? Do they only feed you if your husband's with you?”

“That was one of them. The other is why don't you want us to get some Adaban food? Is it that terrible? Or . . .” Hugal placed a firm hand on Dirant's shoulder. “You think it's too good for us?”

“Both have the same answer. There is an eight out of ten chance this place is run by Riks and a four out of ten chance it's run by Ottkirs. You may think my numbers off, and you are wrong. Probably the proprietors are both fat, and if you know a better indication of a good restaurant, this is the time to tell me.”

“He fell for it, Hugal.”

“That's right, Eyanya. Now that all of Grenlof's secrets are laid bare, the invasion can commence.”

And it did, a culinary invasion the robust Rik husband and his Ottkir wife were glad to experience. They also accepted the praise the foreigners had for the meal, and if their pleasure was greater than Dirant's on account of being unaware the people saying it had just escaped a three-day sea voyage, it was at the same time less because they had not picked the place out. The children enjoyed the little spinner built into a few of the tables, intended according to Dirant to help decide who should pay in the event of a disagreement among the diners, and the under-steward marveled that the cost of feeding sixteen people eager for the comforts of land came out to under three miskhanen.

“What that comes out to in Redrin money is unclear to me,” Dirant said. “I must seek compensation later. These coins all seem about the same in my estimation, and that is why I am not allowed near the company finances.”