Jimmy ran from his sister’s trailer. Cameron refused to come out and he didn’t want to die standing there banging on the door. His nephew had heard him, he had to of, the dopey kid just didn’t live in reality.
All he was looking forward to doing today was go hunting with his friends and taking along his nephew to toughen up the kid some. Now, all Jimmy cared about was making it out of the trailer park alive. Arriving at his truck, Jimmy’s shaking hands took far too long to start the old Ford.
He cursed himself for panicking like someone in a bad disaster movie, but all he could think about was getting away from the collapsing trailer park. The truck coughed out a puff of dark smoke from the exhaust pipe as the engine finally caught and roared to life. Looking in his rearview mirror as he peeled out of the Cozy Cottage Trailer Park, Jimmy decided it wasn’t like a disaster movie, after all, it was more like a horror movie.
He nearly hit a tree as he watched a pair of giant centipede looking bug things as they tugged at the fat guy who lived in the trailer next to the entrance of the park. The old drunk must have been roused by the commotion of whatever was happening, choosing the absolute worst time to exit his rusting trailer. Jimmy gagged and the old man’s screams stopped when the bugs managed to pull him apart at the waist.
The ground shook hard again, and this time it opened up to swallow the trailers. In mere moments, the trailer park was gone, changed to something new even as Jimmy stopped near the main road to watch. Where a couple of dozen dilapidated, old trailers had once sat was now an open cave mouth.
The centipedes each dragged their half of the old drunk into the cave. From the cave, a nine-foot-tall hunched over caveman looking creature emerged, shouting at the centipedes like someone would do to a pet dog they were angry at. The thing spoke in some language Jimmy hadn’t ever heard before. He tried to focus on the caveman, hoping the new space game thingy controlling everything would kick in and tell him what it was.
Troglodyte.
That was it? That’s all the Upgrade robots in his body would tell him? He didn’t even know what a troglowhatever was, well he supposed he knew now…it was a dopey nine-foot-tall caveman looking guy with a club. Sometimes the Upgrade would give detailed stuff about what he focused on.
This time it was zilch. Still, whatever that thing was, it might be responsible for swallowing up his sister’s trailer and his nephew with it. He may not like the wimpy kid, but out here in the country, family is family, and you don’t mess with a man’s family.
Jimmy drove as fast as he could on the narrow back roads to his friend Mike’s house. Mike only lived a few miles away, thankfully. If they had been meeting at Cole’s place, it would have taken him a half hour to get there, who knew what would happen to Cameron while he was driving around the county. Pulling into Mike’s gravel driveway, Jimmy could see that both Mike and his brother Cole were already there, packing up their jeep for the hunting trip. The last member of their group, Ray, was sitting on the hood drinking a beer. Jimmy skidded to a stop in front of the group.
“My sister’s whole trailer park is gone! Some kind of pit swallowed it up, including Cameron!” Jimmy blurted out, still in shock over what he had seen.
“Woah, slow down Jimmy Bob. Take it easy and tell me what happened. Are you saying some Upgrade thing appeared near your sister’s place?” Mike replied. Jimmy took a deep breath and tried to gather his thoughts. He’d seem some bad things in his life, but nothing compared to a man being torn apart by giant centipedes.
“Yeah, give me a minute,” Jimmy said before continuing.
“So, I went to pick up Cameron, since he was going to tag along on our hunting trip today. Well, when I got there, the ground started shaking and swallowed up the whole trailer park. While it was doing that, some giant bugs showed up and killed that old drunk that lives near the entrance.
All the trailers were sucked into the ground and now there is a cave there. Oh, and there was some caveman guy called a troglodyte there, handling the giant bugs like they was some huntin’ dogs,” Jimmy told the others. Jimmy waited as Mike thought about what to do. They had all been friends since elementary school and Mike was always the smart one of the group.
“Here’s what I figure. Your sisters' place has been swallowed up by some monster lair or one of them dungeon things I heard about on the news. Cameron may still be alive, but not for long if we don’t do something. We can call the police, but who knows how long it will take them to respond with all the craziness going on.
“It’s best we handle this ourselves and get Cameron back. We were heading out to hunt today anyway, so let’s load up and drop an old fashion whoopin’ on that caveman and his pet bugs,” Mike said, the others nodding in agreement.
“Ray, don’t you have a cousin that does pest control stuff? Jimmy asked, remembering that Ray’s cousin had given him a discount when he had to spray his place for roaches a few years ago.
“Yeah, I’ll give Lemule a call to meet us there, he has all kinds of chemicals and stuff that might work on big bugs as good as they do on the smaller critters. I bet he even developed some extra goodies due to the Upgrade. Your sister lives in one of the Cozy Cottage trailers, right?’ Ray asked.
“Yup, that’s the place. Tell him to get there as fast as he can and to come packing,” Jimmy told Ray.
The group began to gather whatever gear and weapons they thought might be useful. Mike and Cole grabbed shotguns, leaving behind the hunting rifles that might be less useful underground. They grabbed some backpacks and began to stuff rope, bandages, and even an old bear trap inside.
Jimmy had his rifle in the cab of his truck. The weapon was long and unwieldy, but it was all he had beside his old Colt 1911, which he wore on a belt holster. There was plenty of ammo and Ray even had an old sack he wouldn’t tell the others the contents of…only stating it was for “emergencies”.
Within fifteen minutes, they were on the road. Jimmy and Ray were riding in his truck with Cole and Mike following in their Jeep. They pulled off onto the side road where the trailer park had been. Instead of a few rows of dilapidated trailers, they found what looked like a freshly plowed field sporting a low cave entrance in the middle of it. A few minutes later Ray’s cousin Lemule showed up in his work van. The van was emblazoned with the name The Bug Reaper on the side and had a picture of the grim reaper chasing some cartoon bugs away.
“Didn’t there use to be a trailer park here?” Lemule asked as he exited the bug van.
“Sure was, my sister’s place and all the other trailers were swallowed up by that thing. My nephew Cameron is in there somewhere and the boys are going to help me get him out. There was something called a troglodyte and a couple of giant centipedes with him. I watched with my own eyes as the bugs tore a man in half and dragged the parts into that cave. You ok helpin’ us with this Lemule, it could get kind of dangerous?” Jimmy asked. He didn’t know Lemule that well, but since he was kin with Ray, Jimmy had met him a few times.
“Absolutely, let me get my gear,” Lemule replied before opening the van and rooting around inside for his gear. When he was done, he had a large pack with tubes of strange colored chemicals strapped on his back. The pack was connected by a steel braided hose to a high-tech sprayer that Lemule carried with a confidence that said he knew how to use it.
“This is a special bug juice cocktail I cooked up. It’ll take care of any insect or arthropod no matter how big the freaks grow. If that doesn’t work, well, this might come in handy,” Lemule said as he pulled a monster-sized revolver from the van and placed it in a shoulder holster.
“I don’t know what an art’o’pod is, but that hand cannon looks like a Ruger .454 Casull. That round can drop a bear, so I’m sure it’ll be fine against a caveman or a giant bug,” Jimmy replied, impressed with the exterminator’s choice in handguns.
“Let’s get moving boys, times a-wastin'. I’m not letting some stupid Upgrade creature kill folks here in Monroe County. They can feed on the city slickers in town if they want to, but us country folk know how to take care of our own,” Mike said, walking toward the cave entrance while racking a shell into his shotgun. The rest of the group followed, Jimmy quickly stepping away from Lemule when he pushed a button on his pack and the thing began to hiss and whine as the chemicals inside mixed together.
“Just what is in that pack, I never seen no exterminator use nothing like that before?” Jimmy asked.
This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there.
“This here is Ruby Loo, a special item I was able to craft with my new Upgrade skills. I can create new chemical combos and identify any type of pest,” Lemule said proudly. Jimmy had to admit, it sounded pretty cool. When the upgrade happened, he had received basic skills in firearms, bladed weapons, and hunting like he supposed most folks in the county had. Working on keeping his old truck running had also skilled him up in mechanical aptitude. Other than some farming skills he gained from tending small fields his family kept, that was it.
The group approached the cave, pulling out flashlights and awkwardly holding them as they tried to balance weapons and lights at the same time. They hunted in the daytime and Jimmy didn’t have any fancy muzzle mounted lights or optics like the police and Army used. Still, the large mag lights they all carried put out a solid amount of light and could be used as a makeshift club if needed. The cave entrance opened into a single giant chamber and the group paused for a minute to let their eyes adjust to the low light.
“I guess that’s where all the trailers went,” Ray said as the group looked around the huge chamber. Each trailer was stacked vertically and used as a pillar to support the roof of the chamber. Several had crushed in half and most of the others looked on the verge of doing so as well.
“Ahhhh! Get it off me!” Lemule cried. Jimmy turned toward the screaming man as a pair of shotgun blasts boomed. Hanging from the ceiling, one of the giant centipedes had stretched down and bit into Lemule, hauling him off his feet as several of its forward legs tried to restrain onto the thrashing man.
The buckshot from the shotguns his friends wielded dented and cracked the hardened carapace of the centipede but didn’t do much damage. The game-like systems of the Upgrade came into play, showing Jimmy the health bars for his friends and the creature they were fighting. Lemule’s bar was down by a third and dropping as a green droplet icon appeared next to his name, showing that he was poisoned by the monstrous bug.
Jimmy pulled the trigger on his hunting rifle after aiming at a section of centipede body still grasping the ceiling, he didn’t want to take any chance of hitting Lemule with his shot. The boom of his rifle was even more deafening than the shotgun blasts and left his ears ringing as he watched the effect. Unlike the buckshot fired from his friends’ shotguns, Jimmy’s rifle was chambered in .300 Winchester Magnum, a caliber designed to hunt large game.
The round easily blasted through the shell of the centipede and out the backside before ricocheting off the roof of the cavern and back into the giant creepy crawly. The now shattered section of the centipede was too weak to support the weight of its front half along with the added weight of the kicking Lemule in its grasp.
With a cracking sound the centipede pulled in half, the front half that held Lemule dropped with a soft thump onto the dirt floor as the back half remained anchored to the ceiling. Slimy strands of whatever was inside the monster dripped slowly down, narrowly missing Jimmy as he worked the bolt on his rifle to chamber the next round. With the centipede dead, the others struggled to pry Lemule from its mandibles. With a final squelching sound, Lemule was freed just as his health dipped below one quarter. A soon as he separated from the jaws, the poison indicator dropped from his icon.
“One good thing about being an exterminator, I get an increased resistance to venom, poisons, and any chemical stuff,” Lemule said to the party.
Mike pulled a first aid kit from his pack and began to bandage up the disgusting puncture wounds the centipede had caused. Jimmy knew that he and his friends were no geniuses, but they were pretty good at patching up wounds. Any hunter worth his salt got at least some training to deal with possible accidents.
To his surprise, Lemule pushed Mike back and struggled painfully to his feet while reaching for the spray nozzle dangling from his side. Jimmy looked in the direction Lemule was focused on and involuntarily took a step back at the sight. The second giant centipede was crawling from the broken window of the nearest trailer.
Also, a half dozen smaller—if three-foot-long centipedes could be considered small—versions of the monster were following in its wake. Lemule calmly raised the sprayer and unleashed a hissing stream of pesticide at the approaching monsters. The stream hit the large centipede which stiffened immediately before curling into a ball. The smaller ones were then sprayed, falling just as easily to the chemical cocktail as the larger one had. Smoke drifted up for the pile of balled up abominations as whatever Lemule had sprayed them with ate into their bodies.
You have defeated a colony of Giant Centipedes. 250 experience awarded to each party member.
Your skill in rifles had increased by 1.
Jimmy smiled at the notification; glad he had received some experience as well as a skill up for his weapon of choice. The skill-ups were still strange to Jimmy and the changes often subtle. When working on his truck, his mechanical aptitude skill might kick in and let him notice a loose wire or a part that was about to fail while his weapon skills meant he could load quicker or find his sight picture more efficiently. All in all, any reward from the twisted Upgrade was welcome.
“Rawwww, bahk tu no chaba!” The troglodyte yelled as it ran from behind a trailer. Jimmy couldn’t understand what it was saying, but he was smart enough to recognize that the caveman guy was not a happy camper as it looked at its dead pet bugs. Almost nonchalantly, Cole raised the double-barreled shotgun he preferred and blasted both barrels into the charging troglodyte. The buckshot proved much more effective against the soft-skinned creature than it had been against the hard-shelled centipedes. Two fist-sized holes were blasted through the torso of the troglodyte, who looked at the damage with a confused expression before collapsing dead on the ground.
“That’s what I’m talking about, brother, show these space freaks how we do it down here!” Mike cheered before starting to bandage Lemule once more. Jimmy received some very welcome notifications as the ringing in his ears slowly faded.
You have cleared the Troglodyte Cavern. 500 experience awarded to each party member. Congratulations, you have reached level 5. Open your interface to review any changes.
Jimmy was distracted from leveling by the sight of his sister’s trailer. He ran over to the now vertical mobile home before kicking out a window near the ground. Setting aside his rifle, Jimmy pulled his pistol as he wormed his way inside. The flashlight revealed a pile of debris and the struggling form of Cameron, partially buried in the junk that had fallen upon him when the trailer shifted from horizontal to vertical.
Jimmy swept the light around, looking for any more giant bugs before digging out Cameron. The kid was down a small bit of health from the blows that the bits of furniture and junk had dealt him but would likely be fine once he was freed.
“Uncle Jimmy, you came back?” Cameron mumbled with a shocked expression on his face.
“Of course, you idiot. Had to round up the boys and enough firepower to take out these things,” Jimmy said while handing the dazed nephew to the Cole and Ray who pulled him from the trailer. Jimmy followed behind, not liking the way the trailer frame was starting to bend under the weight of the cavern.
“Guys we need to scoot soon, I don’t want the roof to crash down on us when the rest of the trailers finally give way,” Jimmy said as he emerged. His nephew ran up and hugged his uncle, crying with relief at being rescued.
“Stop the waterworks kid, we need to leave,” Jimmy said while prying Cameron off him. The kid looked around, taking in the dead troglodyte and its pet centipedes.
“You guys killed them all? That trogg was only level four, but the big centipedes were level six. Sure, the small ones were only level one or two, but you guys are all only level four or five,” Cameron said, impressed.
“Yep, just hit level five after the fight. Hey, how did you know their levels and stuff? The system only told me their names, and not much else?” Jimmy asked.
“I’m a gamer Uncle Jimmy, the Upgrade transferred those skills into real life. I know gamer stuff, like the fact you haven’t looted the corpses yet,” Cameron replied, pointed toward the bodies of the monsters they had killed. Jimmy and the others walked over to the corpses and Cameron motioned to grab them. A little disgusted, Jimmy followed his lead and touched a smaller centipede. Instead of a slimy corpse, he felt paper, pulling out a small stack of money! It was a five-dollar bill and a few singles.
“Hey, I got eight bucks from the little bug!” Jimmy said excitedly. The others began to loot in earnest, the group finally pulling a total of 456 dollars from the bodies.
“Look at this!” Cole said, pulling two boxes of shotgun shells from the corpse of the troglodyte. “Says this one will add fire damage and the shells in the other box will add frost damage to anything I shoot with them!” Cole said, practically hugging his new acquisition.
“What the heck did you find Lemule?” Jimmy asked as Lemule pulled a small metal keg from the largest centipede corpse.
“You guys can link the description of all the loot in your group chat. It looks like the system placed you in a party even though you didn’t tell it to,” Cameron advised, Lemule started fiddling with his interface settings, a big stupid grin on his face the whole time. Jimmy realized the reason for the grin when he read the item description.
Pony Keg of Plenty. This artifact will create 7.75 gallons of the least expensive brand of a locally popular brew each day. The brew will be chilled to the preference of the user and normal or “light” versions of the brew can be selected.
“That must be the greatest thing ever discovered by mankind,” Mike said with reverence.
“You better share that cuz!” Ray warned.
“Of course. Let’s head over to my place to celebrate!” Lemule said, hauling the heavy keg and walking toward the cave entrance.
“Sounds like a plan, think there are any more troglodytes and centipedes around here?” Jimmy asked as the group followed Lemule outside.
***
Cameron’s mother never returned to the site of the former trailer park. I couldn’t determine if she had met an untimely demise or followed a new boyfriend out of town. Frankly, I didn’t care either way.
Jimmy let Cameron stay at his place and the two became close. Jimmy never had any kids and after seeing how Cameron’s gaming skills could be useful, he ended up adopting him. The two now live a happy life, having joined with the others to form what they call the Redneck Rowdies Adventuring Club. The group specializes in vermin and insect-based dungeons, making quite a name for themselves in the southeastern part of the country.
The fact that the party was rewarded in United States Dollars may seem strange to us now, but the Upgrade hadn’t standardized the monetary system of the world at that time. It was at around the one year mark AU (After Upgrade) when the world’s currencies were converted to the Galactic Official Legal Denomination (GOLD) we use today. Imagine having to carry around stacks of paper or plastic cards to pay for things! I’m so glad we can interface and exchange funds with just a thought.
Lairs, like the one Cameron and his friends faced, can transform the areas around them suit their needs. Sometimes, they transform the objects around us in a more subtle manner. Often, these less intrusive lairs are the deadliest…