“Ugh… this is ~really~ hard. It keeps getting stuck!” Lapis moans, with a grimace.

“You have to keep it moving. Use all your strength.” I nod, trying desperately hard not to laugh at her accidental innuendo as she’s mixing the ingredients for the cinnamon biscuits.

I decided to equip her with my apron with cats on for the purpose of baking, and her little twirl with it on was quite arousing to me. Now that I’ve admitted my own love, I simply can’t help myself from getting too excited at her cute behaviours, which seem to amplified by over 9000 percent now.

“No way, I can’t! I’m done!” She proclaims suddenly, her chest heaving in tiredness.

Fortunately, she made it most of the way. I take the bowl off her and give it a final swirling with another flour sprinkle. The dough is practically done like this. We simply need to roll it out and make it into shapes.

“This is good. Spread some flour onto the board and we can use the pin to beat it into shape.”

She does, and I pop the big blob of dough on the surface for her. She picks up the roller pin… and after observing the blob of dough for a moment… slams it down like a lethal weapon.

Oh no!

A massive burst of flour erupts, covering her face and clothes in powder and making her cough. There is a neat furrow in the dough, where the side of rolling pin turned sword is now buried.

I probably should have specified how to make it flat.

Actually, this makes me think… isn’t playing with flour really dangerous if you use electricity magic? Yikes.

“Erm; sorry I should have said, we have to roll it out gently.” I apologise at my oversight.

She looks back at me like some kind of Japanese Geisha with a white face. But then she starts laughing. Well, at least she’s having fun. I start to chuckle.

“I’ll change.” She says after she calms down.

“I’ll wait for you to come back.” I offer.

“No, that’s okay. You can roll it out, Jim.” She nods.

“Okay, fine.” I nod. She wanders off around to the bedroom. Fortunately, there wasn’t enough flour to mess up the floor badly so long as we clean it afterwards

Rolling out dough is rather therapeutic to me. It’s a nice way to just relax with physical labour, and its reason I’m adequate at baking things.

I probably do it a bit more intensely than usual, because part of my brain is very well aware that she is changing not very far away from me. I can’t help it. Nearly all men are perverts, the only difference between us is how honest you are with it.

I’m so engrossed in flattening and cutting out biscuits that I don’t notice her returning until she suddenly hugs me from behind. I practically leap out of my skin.

“Oh, you’re back. Now we just need to…”

She lets go and I hear her step back, so I turn around.

Stolen novel; please report.

Only to recoil again in shock. She has changed, and is wearing the same apron.

But now that’s all she is wearing, besides her smile.

And she just hugged my back like that. Pretty much in her birthday suit.

“Uh. Hi. I think you forgot something.” I can’t help but stutter and clear my throat, even as I struggle against the heat of hell itself that is building up in my face.

What a stupid thing to say! I shouldn’t have praised her courage before! That caused it to level-up! Heck, was the slamming of flour all a set-up!?

“Hmm? But you just said it just before. I don’t need anything ON you. I only need YOU.” She cocks her head, raises an eyebrow and grins.

“That wasn’t what…” I stutter.

Oh god. It really was a set-up! Her dangerous level just shot off the charts! Alarm bells are sounding all over, and I try desperately to keep focus on her face rather than anywhere, anything else.

But that doesn’t help at all. After all, she has a lovely face and beautiful eyes and everything else I praised her for not an hour ago. I stand transfixed in awe, and then get shamed as her gaze drops slightly, and then raises up again, making her grin in the process.

Her Thunder Stride into me knocks me completely off balance, and I knock the now empty bowl over, as she somehow ends up beneath me, the apron dislodged. As I thought, she is naked beneath it, and it is now untied and loose.

And I just can't stop staring into her eyes. They’re a maelstrom, a vortex. Her grasping hands, her frenzied breath, her wild hair, her deepest irises, her desire-filled smile. All of her is pinning me down.

"Lapis. PLEASE. I... I... won't be able to stop..." I make a final plea, gulping.

"Then don't. Everything of mine is yours. This is also what I want. I only need YOU." She touches my cheek gently with one hand and unzips something with the other.

Then she giggles again…

Oh, fuck it.

So, I do.

...

...

...

"Lapis. My Lapis Lazuli. I love you."

"Jim. My Jim. My hero. I love you too." She mirrors.

We still stay intertwined everywhere else, holding hands, sharing our steam, gazing at each other in love, and bathing in the literally golden and blue afterglow.

. . .

"You might say you swiped me right off my feet." I chuckle after staring at her for a while, my eyes greedily taking in her lovely post-coital appearance.

She rolls her eyes and pinches my nose. But then she giggles as well.

But then she groans as she tries to stand up. She staggers as she does. I jump up myself to help her.

“Ow! Gods below! You brute... I thought I was gonna die!” She whines.

Urk. Congratulations Jim, you’re now a bonified criminal like the rest of your friends. Well, hopefully the others are not such extremists as that Gavin guy who I didn’t even know from before… but if they are, well, you can always make new friends. Hah…

“I mean, Lapis, what did you expect to happen?” I ask, my eyes looking down in shame.

“Uuu… I know… but… I couldn’t help it. I couldn’t stop thinking about it.” She pouts. Her expression is cute.

“Even so, I’m sorry…” I repent. I look around the devastated kitchen. I think I’m apologising to it as well. The vigorous action has made it into a huge health and safety hazard.

“Its fine.” She comes up and wraps me into a hug again, still rather naked.

“We didn’t even get to finish making the biscuits…” I lament.

"Well, you’ve still got the next two days off work, to teach me… all sorts of baking techniques… right?" She whispers into my ear, looking under her eyes bashfully.

I realise that despite my output, I am still able to become instantly vigorous in certain places.

It’s all because my wife remains as dangerous as always.

I swipe her right up off the kitchen floor and hurry her over to the bedroom.

And with that, our new life together begins in earnest.