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Summoning Shenanigans
Book 3 Chapter 1

Book 3 Chapter 1

Sean’s POV

I walked into the conference room to find a nearly full square table. On one side was a snakeman that seemed to have scales carved from obsidian. Must be Apophis. Directly across from him were Shalora, Ariana, Bruin and Lokir. The first three looked irate, while Lokir actually looked apologetic. One side of the square had an empty chair, but it was closer to the side with the gods of Vitae. And opposite that was good old Steampunk Knight and the Lizardman.

“Everyone sit down and shut up.” System said as she stormed in behind me. I immediately felt myself nearly thrown into the open chair, and spun so that I kept System in my field of view. “It takes a lot to push someone to Omega protocol, but congrats. You are the third set of gods that managed it.”

“What led mphmmmm mph!“ Steampunk started to ask before he was silenced by a pink ball gag with a fuzzy strap.

“You two have no lines in this play. You are here to be witnesses to my show and that is all. I do not wish nor require your input.” System glared at them. Steampunk had stopped trying to talk while Lizardman was desperately trying not to laugh. “I have one for you too if you wish?” She asked him, getting a wide eyed no headshake in return.

“Good. Now, I have absolutely had it with you people. Sean, you’ve already been briefed on what you did, so I won’t go over it again. Besides, if you had proper guidance it likely wouldn’t have happened. As to the rest of you? I am sick of you doing everything you can to skirt the rules. You would have thought making an example of Croea would have been enough, but no. You constantly push and press, hoping that I won’t notice. Did you ever stop and think that I literally see everything?”

“Don’t answer that.” She shook her head. “Let’s go over the inciting incident, and what I am going to do about it. Hold your questions.” She glared at Ariana, who meekly put her hand back down. “I don’t care about your excuses, and you will have zero input on the results. Sean used a blood oracle to check on his family. All in all a fairly understandable reaction. Of course, when he saw them killed and marked by agents of Apophis, something that should have been impossible, he created a time loop. Now I know you are all aware of how summoned champion families are supposed to be sacrosanct, but Croea created a loophole where the summoned person wasn’t actually the target. I didn’t expect her to send Apophis the location of Sean’s family, and even worse I never expected you to act upon that information. Now we have a time loop and a split timeline. So here’s how we are going to fix it.”

“First, gods of Vitae. You are banned from aiding Sean in any way. No contact, no direct aid, no helpful hints. If any of you break this, you will join Croea in being discorporated. Your essence will be used to uplift a new god or goddess, and your temples will be purged. There will be no coming back from that.” As System glared at them, each of the gods shuddered. “Good. Apophis. You directly attacked a summoned hero’s family. Explain what your plan was, just so that there are no misunderstandings.”

“No real plan.” He started to say.

“DO NOT TRY AND LIE TO ME!” System’s voice thundered through the room so loudly that I felt my chest vibrating.

“Fine.” He said with a put upon sigh. “That little mark on their souls would cause them to be reincarnated in my world and marked. I would then take their souls and use the mark to bring back the memories of their previous lives, then use them to make Sean surrender.”

“Hostage situation. Well, no worries there, I have taken them in, and will be protecting their souls until this situation is resolved. You are also banned from direct interference, and as punishment you will also be unable to raise any of your subordinates using divine energy. They will maintain their current status.”

“Sean. Your part will be settled in one of two ways. First, you will be required to obtain a demigod status which will allow you to transverse the world portals from Vitae to Beatha. From there, it’s a simple death match. One of you kills the other. Oh, and to make it interesting we need a time limit. I think one of the traditional lengths shall work. A year and a day. Any questions? Be aware that if I give you any significant information, then I will have to do the same for the other side.”

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“I have an issue with one of my punishments.” Apophis spoke up. “I already have another champion in training. If my current champion were to die, the new one would ascend automatically. This system has been in place for thousands of years, before my compatriots over there accuse me of changing things after the fact. Would this go against the no raising subordinates decree?”

System stood there for a moment, staring off into space as her eyes took on a faint glow. “The system has indeed been in place long before this war started. As such, it will not be altered and Apophis won’t be sanctioned upon the death of a champion. However, you won’t be able to select another champion in training.”

“Acceptable.” He said.

For a while nobody else said anything, so I figured I might as well ask my own question. “System. You mentioned a demigod body. How can I obtain one of those?”

“There are several ways, but the amount of information delivered will be matched by answers to Apophis’ questions.”

“Hold on-“ Bruin started, but I interrupted him.

“That’s fine. Give me the shortest way. That will limit the amount of information he gets.”

“I am ok with that as well.” Apophis said.

“Very well, as both sides are in accord.”

“Now hold on just a minute.” Bruin started to stand, but was immediately hit with a wave of enormous pressure.

“No. The question is accepted, and you lot are forbidden from giving aid.” System said with a glare. “The shortest way is to consume the heart of an apex creature from Beatha that has already crossed the void.”

“Thanks.” I replied, knowing the answer. Why is it someone always has to slay a dragon?

“I would like to know the location of my Champion.” Apophis said.

“The demon capital, being protected by the royal family.” System answered. “Any other questions? No? Fantastic. I will end the time freeze and you will all be returned to your respective worlds. Remember, there will be no more chances. Obey the rules, or else.” With a snap of her fingers, everyone else disappeared while my family showed up with Elendria.

“Daddy’s back!” Isabelle cried, running and jumping through my chest again. She had this adorable pout on her face as she looked at System. “The other you said I could give him a hug. What’s taking so long?”

System raised an eyebrow in her direction as Isabelle put both fists on her waist. Letting out a slight chuckle, System waved her hand and my family gained a slight glow for a second. “Well, I wouldn’t want to make the other me a liar, so here you go. One hug, then you get to say your goodbyes for now.”

“Thanks System lady!” Isabelle cried, dashing and latching onto my leg.

“So how much trouble am I in?” I asked as Elendria and Danielle sauntered up to us.

“Not as much as you think, but more than you hope.” Danielle said. “System is letting me live through what you went through when you arrived, so you have that to look forward to when we meet again.”

“I’ve also volunteered to let your wife live through my early years, so she can see my culture.” Elendria chimed in. “Where we go from there, or if there’s even a we, will be seen.”

“I see.” I said, butterflies still doing a dance in my stomach. “Thanks for at least hearing me out on things.”

“PSSSST.” I heard from my leg. “Daddy!” Isabelle gave a stage whisper. “I like Auntie Elendria. She’s got cold magics and can make me snow cones whenever I want!”

“Oh really? Well, we can’t argue against snow cones now, can we?” Danielle chuckled.

“Sorry, but time really is up. Sean, Elendria, I will return you both to the oracle tent. After that, things are up to you. Good luck.”

With a wave of her hand, we found ourselves in a nearly empty tent. The oracle rocked back with a look of horror on her face. “You! You marked them! You changed the past!” Scrambling backwards, her back hit a support pole and she froze. “This is bad, this is bad. Bad! System’s gonna destroy us for creating a time loop.”

“Easy.” I said, dropping down to her level and looking her in the eyes. “We’ve already had a discussion with System. You aren’t in trouble, and I won’t be bothering you anymore. I just need directions to the nearest dragon.”

“You talked with the System?” She froze. Flashing back and forth between horror and awe, she finally settled on awe after a few moments. “Dragon? Why would you need, no. Nevermind, I don’t want to know. Seventy miles southwest of town is a volcano. He lives in there, and guards their claimed lands from anyone dumb enough to intrude.”

“Thanks.” I said, and Elendria followed me out of the tent.

“I’m coming with.” Elendria stated.

“That’s fine, but you’ll have to leave all the fighting to me. Something tells me it won’t work with interference.”

“Very well. After you transform, we’ll have to find me a dragon too.” She said. At my questioning look, she explained, “Don’t give me that look. I wouldn’t want you going alone anyway, but I am under strict orders to watch your back and make sure nothing happens to you. Your daughter also threatened me. Even though they are quote, ‘icky’, she will get some bugs and put them in my bed while I’m not looking.”

“Well, we can’t have bugs in our beds, so let’s see what this dragon has to say.” With that, we both sprouted wings and headed southwest.