As I started pondering on what to do about my situation, I quickly remembered one thing, mana, or my lack of it, then I willed my mana counter to be in front of me.
Mana Points: 4/15
“Four huh?”
Though I wasn’t sure how much time had passed since I had last look at how much mana I had, I was sure it had been a few good minutes, but the problem was, how long was four mana going to last me?
I don’t remember how much mana I had while fighting the lynx, but I remember my senses starting to deteriorate and my mind and body not being in sync around the 1 mana mark, so I probably shouldn’t leave with only four mana now should I? But for how long does a mana point sustain my skill Bind? A minute? 5 minutes? 10???
I-I am not sure… wait, I am pretty sure I can test it here…
As I said that to myself, I took a look at my mana counter to see it was still at four and started walking back and forth in the burrow, and started counting but after only 30 seconds, I saw my mana counter drop.
Mana Points: 3/15
“WHAT! Only half a minute?! And I know for a fact I didn’t only spend a single mana point as there is unseen decibels there… so am I just… fucked?
… NO, that can’t be! There must be a way for me to conserve more mana! And I am sure I lost that 1 Mana while fighting the lynx in like a minute, I just wasn’t sure so that’s why I started counting, but what could’ve changed since then and now…”
As I started thinking about everything that happened, my gaze shifted towards one of my hind legs.
“A… fuck, my leg is pretty eaten… is that why I am using so much mana?”
To test my theory, I watched that leg in particular while I moved and, even though I could see bones and a clear lack of muscle on the leg, it worked as if it was just a normal leg without any problems whatsoever, and after another 30 seconds or so, I saw my mana points drop by another point.
Mana Points: 2/15
“Son of a… I guess I am not touching grass anytime soon then, how funnn… not.”
As I looked at my fucked up hind leg, and my mana counter, I started to think about how I could fix my small mana problem.
“Hmm… maybe Bind’s description can shed some light on it? I am pretty sure I need to learn mana control, but hopefully the description can help me get a start?... What am I saying, anything done by the system is not going to be helpful, but looking can’t hurt.”
As I said that I opened my system window and gave a mental click to Bind to see its description.
Description Bind (Z): Allows the being in possession of it to bind their soul to things that don’t possess a soul.
That… that doesn’t say anything about mana, at fucking all… But I guess it makes some sense for it to use mana as, I don’t think grafting a soul onto a dead corpse is not something possible through conventional means. Though I am not sure this is grafting… maybe possession? Eh, who cares, will figure it out later.
Then I closed my eyes, not that it was necessary, and started trying to feel my mana cloud, and when I felt it, I started doing small motions, trying to see how my mana cloud would react and how it would use my mana to move the corpse, and what I sensed was… weird.
As I made small motions, like moving my body from left to right without walking anywhere, I felt my mana cloud moving with my body, or my body moving with my mana cloud, but while I was only doing slight motions with my body, my mana cloud was moving like crazy! If I turned slightly to the left, it would throw itself to the left, and if I moved a bit to the right, it would throw itself to the right!
And while it was doing that, some mana particles would inevitably be thrown off or separated from my mana cloud, joining the ambient mana and doing whatever mana does in the air.
“Okay, why the fuck is it doing that?!”
I asked myself while being totally calm, and even if a hint of anger and surprise seeped into my voice… it was totally normal because, what the actual fuck?
At least now I know why I was losing mana so quickly! My mana would just throw itself around and some of the mana would leave my mana cloud because of the sudden acceleration and stop. Now the question is, why is it doing that, and how do I fix that?
…Actually, before I start thinking about those… would my body move if I moved my mana cloud myself?
So, that’s what I tried, I put my, metaphorical, hands on my mana cloud, and started slowly moving it to left and right, but even after I brought my mana cloud to the places where it moved before and suddenly stopped, my body didn’t move at all!
Okay, maybe those mana particles that disconnect from my mana cloud are actually useful somehow? Hmm… let me look at them once again…
And look at my mana cloud and particles that left my mana cloud I did, but weirdly enough, I noticed some particles weren’t actually joining the ambient mana, and were just… disappearing? I mean, I didn’t see where they went so, they might as well have, disappeared… wait actually, how is my body even moving? I understand that mana has something to do with it, but how exactly?
Hell, I am pretty sure ı don’t even have any blood left so I shouldn’t even be moving… Fuck, I am so stupid, of course mana would somehow substitute blood in some way, or make the muscles move, because it of course is like that! Stupid fucking mana, breaking the laws of… I don’t know, fucking biology or something?
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So, if we say that mana, at least the mana that disappears from my mana cloud, is somehow replacing blood, and making muscles move, it makes sense for me to be able to use mana to do things this body normally could but, how long will I be able to do this for?
I mean, what if mana doesn’t 100% replace blood, or its functions. I am pretty sure this body already has like trillions of bacteria and viruses eating it and causing a lot of infections and stuff, and in a few days they should start showing themselves, and even if the body doesn’t deteriorate because of microbial life, I am not sure for how long mana can keep the muscles moving, because one day they are going to dry up and become brittle if they don’t get infected and rot before that, but I might still be able to use this body for a bit even if all the muscle is gone because one of my hind legs, even though its bones are clearly visible, is still usable! Though I am not sure for how long I will be able to use it for… As I am pretty sure, even though mana has a lot of esoteric properties, it seems to have some… laws? Fuck it, laws.
There seems to be some laws of mana, even though I don’t know them, and I suspect I will be able to continue using this body for longer than a day, maybe two at max, and even if I actually use this body for longer than a day, I’ll have to use more and more mana to actually continue using it, as mana somehow manages to fill in for things like blood and maybe muscles too? I am still not sure how that bony leg of mine works, but I’ll learn it soon.
But what I get from all this is, ı really need to figure out how to learn mana control, and fast. Hopefully in the next hour or so?... Yeah, let’s not be that hopeful…
After I said that I once again focused on my mana cloud and started moving it around, occasionally moving parts of my body to test how their movements would affect it. And as I continued testing and prodding my mana cloud, I came to an important realization.
“…Not all of my mana is moving when I move…”
I realized, whenever my body moved only a small part of my mana cloud would actually move in a direction, and it would stretch itself so it could move further, but as it moved, and inevitably pulled more mana to the side that was stretching, it would seem as if it was throwing itself in a direction, rather than stretching, but because it moved so fast some mana would still get detached and join the ambient mana.
“Interesting…”
As I realized that I decided to let it stay that stretched, and continue moving that part of my body, and as I continued to watch my mana cloud, I saw that when it was stretched out, it wouldn’t throw itself around!
…Well, it still would to some extent, but it was noticeably lesser than before.
“Does my mana cloud need to be stretched for it to be able to infuse mana into my body? And couldn’t I just… knead my mana cloud in a certain direction or pull it manually so it didn’t just flail around like one of those tube men in front of restaurants?
…Well, only one way to find out.”
So, I stopped stretching that part of my mana cloud, and after making sure it was back in its place, I started manually stretching that part again until it was at the spot it was before I retracted it, at least I think that’s the spot it was at… I can’t really bring a tape measure into my brain and make sure I am at the correct spot so I kinda just have to guess and pray that I am correct but, eh, what’s gonna happen if I am wrong? I’ll only lose a bit of mana.
So, I started moving my limb that was connected to the stretched part of my mana cloud and… I was able to move that limb without my mana cloud flailing around so much!
But now the question is, how do I make sure my mana cloud stays in its place? Not like I can just continuously pull it now, can I?
“Hmm… maybe I can just… knead it and it would stay in its place? I know I said something about kneading, but it was just a joke… no way that would work, right?”
So, I set out to work after releasing my grip on my mana cloud. By now I was pretty sure which part of my mana cloud connected to what part of my body, well not 100% sure but close enough.
So, I chose a random part of my mana cloud, stretched it to make sure it worked like my part from before, released it, and started kneading it like dough with my will. And… it kind of worked?
The places I kneaded and pulled would stay like that for a moment, but they would retract to my mana cloud before long, so whatever progress I was making wasn’t actually that important.
“What am I doing wrong?”
As I asked myself that question, I started to once again probe and prod my mana cloud, pulling and kneading it whenever I thought necessary, but my mana cloud just wouldn’t stay in place.
“Arghhh! I wish I had something like a magical stapler so I could staple this thing!... Fucking stupid piece of shit… just wants to make me mad, what would happen if you just stayed in your fucking place…”
As I started getting a bit heated up, I decided to step back and looked through my skills and their descriptions, not because I thought they would help in any way shape or form, but because ı didn’t want to bother looking at my mana cloud any longer.
And as I looked through the skill descriptions, my focus shifted to my skill Ethereal Body.
Description Ethereal Body (S): You are the very essence of life, a soul. And thanks to you being an ethereal being, no physical matter can interact or harm you, but you are extremely weak against any and all magical phenomena. And due to you not having a body, your mana is stored around your soul, and it protects your life force from being scattered by magical phenomena, be it natural or not.
Due to this skill being essential for the life of the being in possession of it, this skill will be constantly active unless the being in possession of it decides to de-activate it while not being under any effects that may alter their decision-making skills.
But, not to everything in the description, just a certain part.
”And due to you not having a body, your mana is stored around your soul, and it protects your life force from being scattered by magical phenomena, be it natural or not.”… your mana is stored around your soul… around your soul… but where is the soul in a normal body then? Is it in the perfect centre of the body, or the heart, maybe even the brain?... Or maybe it isn’t in a certain place… maybe its spread around the body, and the mana in the body protects it, like how my mana cloud protects me…”
As I looked back and forth from the skill description to my mana cloud, I started wondering if my trail of thought was correct. If it is, what happens when someone loses an arm? Do they also lose a part of their soul? Or does the soul just recuperate itself after some time, or does it not do anything at all?
“…Well, I don’t have anything to do so, might as well fallow this train of thought…”
After I said that I sent away the system window, focusing on my mana cloud as a whole, and tried to sense my soul, slowly going through every single part of my mana, in the hopes that I could sense something. I shook my mana cloud around, stretched and released it, just to feel something… and after a few minutes of doing this, I thought I felt something, something I wasn’t sure about the true nature of.
“Holy… shit, is that really my soul or am I going schizo after not having any human interaction after like a day?... I thought I’d last for longer but… maybe, just maybe, I am correct…”
As I said that I tried to get a grasp of that weird sensation, and as I did that, I could feel something in my very being.
“HOLY MOTHER OF- Fuck that feels fucking weird.”
And as I felt something weird, I decided to continue with my plan, and first started pulling my mana cloud, and felt that it was moving away from my soul.
“So that’s why it was retracting after some time… my soul isn’t moving with my mana cloud…”
And after I moved my mana cloud, I started slowly, and as carefully as I could, to pull my soul, not that I was that scared of accidently pulling it away from the safety of my mana cloud, but hey, you can never be too safe.
And as I finished pulling my soul, and stopped my gripping it, felt it stay there, as if that was the place it was supposed to be, giving me a weird feeling of just… things being right.
And not a moment after I was done, I heard the dinging of a system message.
*ding*
Congratulations! You have gained the skills Soul Sense (Z) and Soul Manipulation (Z) through trial and hard work!
…YOU MOTHER FUCKER!!!! WHERE IS MY FUCKING MANA CONTROL!?