Kaden’s first rule of being chased by gnomes was ’Never be chased by gnomes.’ He’d already broken that rule, so the second rule, ‘never destroy your only way of stopping’ was just a wrong move at the wrong time. The third rule, ‘Never stop while being chased by gnomes’ was what he was currently working on keeping unbroken. The problem was that the longer the chase went on, the more gnome warwagons chased.
He’d quickly mastered the timing of throwing the wheel sharply to turn, and ‘two wrongs don’t make a right, but three lefts do,’ as well, and now his strategy was simple: ABT. Always. Be. Turning. If he kept a straight line, it let gomes shoot.
They weren’t good shots with their wands. They were even worse standing atop rattling war-wagons, but they only needed to be lucky once, and there were a lot of gnomes and only a few less lot of war wagons.
“Hold on, I’ve got an idea. Go straight for just a bit.” Sara summoned one of her crawling horrors.
Kaden risked a glance back as she hurled the bitey grub at the closest war-wagon.
At its wheels.
To say the spawn of an elder god exploded would be like saying Terror Bird eggs made good omlets. But the front wheel of the war-wagon kicked up, and it veered sideways, crashing into another—and another.
“Where are they all coming from?” Kaden shouted as he veered sideways, then cut through a marketplace.
Sara didn’t answer. As fast as she hurled one grub, she summoned another.
You have been issued a new Faction Quest: Definitely not a Trap - Lead the gnomes to their final destination. Reward - FILL THIS IN LATER, KILL GNOMES NOW.
“I got a quest!” Kaden shouted as a distant tower of golden light shot into the sky.
“Me too, move, move move.” Sara drew her bow from Inventory and forced a sparkling [Mana Arrow] into existence. She didn’t aim for the gnomes, she aimed for the boiler on the war-wagon, a target thirty times larger than a gnome.
The boiler exploded as lightning melted valves and controls, which left only half a dozen war wagons, and only three could fit abreast in the streets. Kaden made another turn—and oversteered, then corrected, dodging an iceberg that ground chunks of stone from the city as it slid past.
“Don’t let that hit us!”
Sara was usually the queen of strategy, pointing out things he’d never thought of. Dodging the literal wall of ice was not a strategy he needed help with. “I’m trying! Can’t you use one of those wands to return fire?”
In answer, Sara took four from her inventory, handing one to each Horror, which gripped them by tooth, and one in each hand. The wind whipped her hair forward as she perched atop the boiler beside Kaden. “On the next turn.”
He wrapped his right arm around her and yanked the controlls left, using sheer strength to keep Sara from flying out. She fired ahead of the gnomes, at the corner. A series of explosions sent metal raining down.
“That’s it?” Sara said. “That’s all of them. We got—”
Stone exploded in the street ahead of Kaden as the gnomish rolling fortress crushed a house. Kaden didn’t have time to stop, didn’t have time to think. He swung the wheel sharply left, as a fireball struck ahead of him.
The war-wagon tipped onto two wheels.
He lashed out, reaching for Sara.
And missed.
Her pseudopod struck, latching onto his arm, digging flesh out in raking strips as it slid downward. Only his talent let Kaden keep holding on, to swing her closer and back onto the front of the war wagon.
“Shit!” Sara shouted. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to!”
“Get in, I need you to steer.” Kaden’s right arm was a shredded mess of bone and muscle, and it didn’t move the way he needed it to, but the rolling fortress was too large to chase…
As another building exploded, Kaden really wished he hadn’t mocked Fate. “Steer us toward the Quest Destination.”
“I’m working on it. It’s harder than you made it look.”
Kaden swigged a health potion and stashed the vial. Other Adventurers would toss spent vials, but his history made them too valuable. The muscles on his arm began to stretch and grow, which itched, but he couldn’t scratch since there wasn’t skin. To his right, a volcano of fire errupted, melting an entire house. To his left, a meteor the size of a mountain impacted, destroying the street.
Damage to Territory invokes penalty.
Damaged Territory is 3x easier to hold.
Damaged Teritory is 3x harder to capture.
Don’t Damage Territory!
Well, that explained why gnomes were usually so careful. Sara cut right and then across, lining up for a straight run toward the Quest Target.
Kaden squinted as gnomes streamed down the sides of their rolling fortress, clogging the masive elemental wands it used to demolish…everything. “They’re shooting gnomes at us!”
Sara whipped around a corner as an explosion demolished the front left wheel. The War Wagon now dipped down, throwing sparks each time, and tearing metal loose. “Get to the opposite corner! We need to balance that.”
Metal fragments had buried themselves in Sara’s face, but she didn’t lose focus, making the final turn. All that remained was stoping the wagon and not dying in the process or turning into a missle that killed all the friendly troops.
“At the last street, cut right and let it throw us.” Houses whizzed by as the gnomish fortress began to rattle closer and closer. [Identify] kicked in, and Kaden nearly gasped. There were level fifty gnomes on board, wearing metal armor that appeared to be bolted through the skin, maybe straight to their bones.
A tier difference was all the difference in the world.
Ahead of them shone a blinding column of white light, the Quest Target. The Gnome Fortress rattled and belched, and fiery orange missiles impacted the street ahead—then one of them stood.
A level fifty gnome. He drew back his fist for a punch, one that would obliterate the War-Wagon—and probably Kaden.
Timing was everything.
The timing to stand and grab Sara.
The timing to leap upward as the gnome’s fist blurred forward.
He sailed over the gnome as the war wagon exploded behind him and hit the ground running, sprinting.
Adventureres swarmed outward, leaping from roof-tops onto the rolling fortress. A level forty swordsman dodged Kaden, heading to engage the gnome. “Keep moving! Don’t stop until you reach staging!”
Everywhere, gnomes rained down, having launched themselves like living missiles. Sara’s horror caught one by the arms, swallowing both wands before it could fire, and Sara hacked it to death with sloppy slashes.
Kaden’s muscles had grown back enough to let him grip Remembrance.
“Here!” Cutter shouted. “Inside!”
Her voice came from a house two down, and together they ran. Just through the front door, Cutter waited with Eve, Ashi, and four of Cutter’s Party. Her Healer took one look at Kaden’s arm and began to pump health in, growing skin with every cast.
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“You.” Cutter said, risking a glance. “I like you. Stay here with us, let them try and attack. Evelyn’s title is basically gnomish death.”
Now that Kaden was here, Leader of the Pack would make her even more dangerous. “Where did all the Adventureres come from?”
“The moment it was clear their Tower was in trouble, the Poteri sent out prime quests. Most of them aren’t even here, we’re pushing the front line and taking that area.” Cutter leaped forward as a gnome barreled through the doorway. With three separate attacks she glowed red, blue, then orange. The orange made her move faster.
The gnome blasted straight at her—only to find Cutter had dove left and nicked it again. Now it moved slower, and Eve’s [Plague] hit along with [Moon Strike].
Sara’s Horror spat void globs at the gnome, eating holes in the stone, but before Kaden could attack, the gnome’s wand malfunctioned. It fired, backwards, exploding the little bastard.
Cutter’s [Thief] materialized on the opposite side of the doorway. “Don’t go out, there’s 50s hunting. Pretty sure they’re hunting him.”
“It is most certain.” Ashi spoke from the floor above. “And why did I not know of this fire breathing? How long have you been able to incinerate your enemies? How often can you do so?”
“Not long, right before I went to Beast Control, once a day, and no one knew because I wasn’t sure it would work. Also, Mana Shock didn’t knock me out this time.”
“Tier two, it takes more to put you down,” Cutter said. “How many of them did you burn?”
Kaden checked notifications. “There’s something wrong with this counter. No way were there seven hundred gnomes in that patch.”
“I’m showing credit for six hundred and seventy four.” Sara closed her eyes. “The large leap coincides with the tower collapse, so I’d guess we gained credit for every gnome injured who subsequently died.”
Cutter pointed to Kaden. “You, [Stealth]. A level fifty isn’t impossible if I get enough buffs, but I’m not there yet.”
Kaden ran up the stairs and engaged [Stealth Aura] around him and Ashi. His arm was growing new skin, tiny patches of tan slowly appearing over the raw meat. “How are you holding up?”
“It is not difficult to ‘snipe’ these enemies. They know no strategy, they plan nothing. But the elders we must be careful of.” Ashi motioned to a window. “They do not fly, they do not climb. Nor do they show any regard for danger.”
“Pull us some, [Mage] girl!” Cutter’s shout echoed up.
Ashi responded with [Chain Lightning] into a group of gnomes who screamed in rage and sprinted for the house.
Kaden prepared to leap down, but before he could, Ashi shook her head. “Shoot more. Bring more. The woman is a demon, they come to their deaths.”
Using the [Mana Quiver] was not a choice - he didn’t have enough mana (or skill) to even think about drawing directly. Kaden picked a cluster of gnomes laying down repeated ice sheets to protect themselves and fired into the crowd.
And was pleasantly surprised by the trio of poison notifications. He must have shot through a set of gnomes. And they weren’t shooting—[Split Second] let him dive backwards as a pillar of ice blasted through the window and impacted the ceiling, sending chunks downward. “More coming!”
“Yes!” Cutter shouted back. “Sara, kill the ones with wounds, I need fresh victims. Omar, Ved, Ting, protect Eve. Word is there’s a [Gnome Elder] coming.”
“Shit!” One of the [Shields] shouted. “You’re not buffed for that yet.”
Kaden grabbed Ashi’s hand. “You can use me as a [Mana Conduit], right? What’s the widest area of effect spell you have?”
“Water College, [Ice Storm]. It is a minor status effect, slowing the enemy. The range is a hundred yards.” Ashi squinted. “What is it this time? I sense an ‘or.’”
Kaden shouted downward. “I’m going to [Stealth Aura] out into the battle. Ashi’s going to use [Ice Storm] while I run for my life back here. Be ready to heal when I get here.”
“Hold on, coordinating,” Sara said. “Please give me a moment.”
A swarm of Messenger Birds errupted from the front of the house as another explosion whumped out.
“Plan b!” Sara called back. “There’s three [Gnome Elders] already present. We have fifties inbound to deal with them, but I think Eve’s the best choice and chance.”
Kaden leaped downward, careful to stay back from the open doorway. “[Stealth Aura] and Eve’s [Queen of Entropy]?”
“I’ll keep them busy and firing,” Cutter said. “Polly, If you want to do the [Ice Storm] thing I’d love the aggro it builds.”
“Polly?” Sara asked. “Oh. Ashi, that’s you. [Polymage].”
What Ashi said in Vichorean would get them all a slit throat, so Kaden didn’t offer to translate. Instead, he dealt with Eve. “Sorry, but you’re going to have to be close. [Stealth Aura] barely works as is.”
“I’m not allergic to contact, I just don’t desire it.” Eve reached up to put an arm over Kaden’s shoulder.
He scooped her up. The Cosmic Horror had real weight he’d never noticed before. Sara took effort, Eve he could have lifted above his head with one hand. “All right. Here we go.”
Stepping out of the stone house and into the maelstrom, he quickly plotted a path into the sea of gnomes running everywhere. The safest place was deep into the battle. Kaden began to weave his way forward, mindful of the fact that Adventurers wouldn’t know he was there either.
The air above blossomed with clouds, and a thick sleet began to fall all around him. Kaden’s feet weren’t affected, but gnomes slipped and fell, while others moved with slightly less mania. They waved their wands back and forth—then pointed as a group toward the house Kaden had left behind, and began to converge.
“You should be moving,” Eve whispered. “Getting us away from them.”
But Kaden’s experience hunting the [Kalaraks] had taught him that as long as he remained wrapped in [Stealth Aura] the gnomes would move around him, unaware of the effect. He held his breath and stood perfectly still as gnomes swarmed past.
As they reached the doorway, Cutter dashed out, nearly a blur.
Wands belched and smoked and fired—and split. A Gome disappeared under a boulder the size of a war wagon. Another fried a dozen of its friends with a malformed [Chain Lightning] that came far too close.
Kaden moved back, faster and faster as he reached a clear area. “We need to get you next to their fortress. That’s where the elders will be.”
“No. Stay here, make sure Circe isn’t swarmed. When she moves to attack the elders, we move, too.” Eve paused a moment. “Please.”
He could wait. “How close do we need to be?”
“If I can see them, they’re affected for the most part.” Eve flinched as a chain reaction killed branches of gnomes.
Except one. This gnome wasn’t taller. It wasn’t thicker, it was simply more dense, and layer upon layer of rivets tied metal armor to it.
[Elder Gnome]
Those who survive the youth of gnome-hood are a hardier sort, less likely to explode, and given to testing their creations before using them in battle. They constantly improve their own bodies with all kinds of magical prosthetics, and in battle know strategies beyond scream and shoot.
Level: 50
HP: 14,000
Mana: 5,000
Skills: Wand Creation, Wand Work, Wand Modification, Eldritch Invention, Scavenging, Field Construction, Field Repair, Luck, Helping Hand, Craftsman’s Touch, Body Modification, Advanced Body Modification, Body Engineering, Material Enchantment, Resist Fire, Resist Pain, Resist Cold, Resist Boredom, Resist Mental Attack
Talents: Thick-Skinned, Grounded, Fire-Proof, Determined, Single-Minded, Weighty
Oh, that was trouble. The Elder studied the fallen gnomes around it and drew something from Inventory, waving it in the air as it grumbled in a high pitched voice.
Kaden’s stomach churned as the gnome turned—then turned back, looking in his general direction.
“Lookout!” Eve shouted as he set her down and prepared for what was either going to be a glorious final death or a hideously painful healing process.
The Elder already pointed a wand at Kaden, but as the tip glowed brillaint white, the wand kicked back and fizzled.
It shrieked in rage and hurled the wand at Kaden, who snatched it out of the air and pointed it back. Shook it. Shouted words that sounded like something Ashi would say.
The Elder Gnome’s pittering laughter accompanied it drawing another wand, this one with a bright orange tip.
“It must be triggered,” a minature dragon shouted in Ashi’s voice as it landed on him.
Kaden didn’t have a ton of mana, but he did have enough to force into the wand—and the good sense to aim it at the ground in front of the elder.
You have learned a new skill: Wand Work.
[Wand Work]
The usage of magic wands is not simply pointing them in the right direction, but learning to coax the magic out without damaging the wand. You have not learned coaxing or how to avoid damaging, but it still counts. Higher levels won’t have a chance of exploding and taking your hand off. Also, the number of charges per wand will go up.
What materialized in front of Kaden was a shimmering asteroid that looked like the full moon itself. It plowed into the street, struck the Elder and kept going, collecting gnomes.
Kaden Birch wasn’t a proud man, he seized Eve and ran, afraid to fire the wand again, afraid to obliterate Adventurers or houses, but as he ran in, Cutter finally ran out.
She moved so fast it was like an after image, and as she ghosted through the crowd of gnomes, they cried out, each nicked and tainted with her Ritualist power. But Kaden had no question where Cutter was headed.
The Elder had risen and destroyed the Moon boulder with a single punch. No longer did he joke or smile, not even his evil gnome smile. In both hands he held wands and fired anywhere Adventurers dared show their faces, even though his waves of magma and rolling blizzards killed as many gnomes as Kaden had.
Kaden took one look at the devastation and headed upstairs, where he set down Eve and let Ashi look him over. “That did not go well.”
“You had your good plan for the day, you’re out of good plans,” Sara said.
Your Faction has gained Territory x278.
The Lines have been redrawn.
This territory has been declared secure.
Kaden looked out the window as the screaming of gnomes accompanied a full retreat. The Rolling Fortress was rolling—away—at top speed.
Cutter remained locked in her battle with the Elder Gnome, but now the first level fifty Adventurers arrived, a [Mage] who immeidately began absorbing spells. A [Shield] who let Cutter dance behind him to recover. A [Healer] who dressed wounds. A [Swordsman] who waited, a grim smile on her face as she kept her hand on her sheath.
No matter if Cutter won or not, the Elder was going home in pieces—if at all.
And Eve, pressed up behind the [Shield], biding her time.
The failure was inevitable.
And catastrophic. The Elder’s wand failed him, and he shook it. The explosion took off his legs and sent Cutter sailing through the air to collide with a stone house.
You have helped defeat an Elder Gnome
You have gained experience.
Kaden kneeled down, gasping for breath, and let the shakiness pass as adrenaline drained from him. It was over. They’d won.