=== CURT ===

"You're an idiot," Des muttered.

  "Careful now. I might start to think that you like me with that kind of sweet talk." They had their stethoscope pressed against my naked back. Why are stethoscopes always the temperature of a polar bear's dick? Someone should invent a little heating pad for them. I could do that. Wouldn't be hard. Something that you charge. Could use a phone charger. USB-C compatible.

  "No one likes you," Des responded with a tone just as cold as their stethoscope. "You have had one girlfriend since I've known you, and she breezes in and out of your life, and you end up following her like a damn lost dog."

  "Cindi's not bad. You know, just a little hard to tie down. That's a good thing. Especially with y'know." I shrugged.

  "Yeah, it'll be really great when she turns up at your funeral. You're an idiot!"

  "You're repeating yourself."

  "Yeah, well. Maybe if I say it enough, it'll finally sink in." Des sat next to me and adjusted some of the wraps. "Fighting a meta? Are you nuts? And not just any meta but one who can throw a fucking car. I saw what she did to that lizard thing. Threw him up a few stories and then caught him. What the hell were you thinking going up against her?"

  "Really wasn't my intention," I said, avoiding looking at them as I groaned my way into a shirt. "You know those cape and tights types. They just show up wherever they want."

  "Yeah, what bastards. Showing up and just doing things that no one gave them permission to. Kind of like when you showed up in my clinic and was stealing gauze for an 'accident'." Des put finger quotes around the word.

  "It was an accident! I was testing a new version of the control program. And left behind a few inch-"

  "'A few inches of skin.' I remember. You left behind damn near half your fucking arm. Because you're an idiot." They smiled at me. "No one asked you to make a damn teleporter out of junk in your basement. And no one asked you to Robin Hood everything that wasn't nailed down."

  "No one asked me because people are afraid to ask. With me around, they're getting the stuff they need." I winced a bit as I was getting up. It had been a couple of days since the incident with Smash Gal. I had refused painkillers. Didn't respond well to my mind being all muddled. But there were times when I'd regretted that decision.

  "And where do you think you're going?"

  "Been laying around too long. Gotta start getting the stuff to repair my rig."

  "And get yourself killed. Am I putting this visit on your tab?"

  "You're keeping a tab? That machine I built you is worth half a million dollars!"

  "Maybe, but the way I count it, you owe me at least a million."

  "How the fuck could I possi-"

  "I'm both your doctor and your shrink. You have to pay me double every time I come around."

  "How'd you pass med school with math skills like that?"

  "Summa Cum Laude, if I remember correctly."

  "Oh my God, you're such a pain in the ass," I whined, waving them off. They left, finally, and let me plan. Well, left me to stare at my phone endlessly while pretending that I was just going to start planning any minute. I found myself on Twitter, scrolling endlessly. I found a live feed of Smash Gal fighting someone with a fashion sense equally as idiotic. This one uppercutted Smash Gal above the surrounding buildings, and the live feed struggled to keep track. Every time a new hero comes out, other costumed weirdos are eager to challenge them. They called themselves 'super-villains'. I called them attention-seeking morons.

=== KARI ===

I was flying. Well, technically, I had gone flying. After someone in an awesome costume had punched me. They were strong. I don't know how strong. At least strong enough to send me above most of the surrounding buildings. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. With a minor effort of will, I stopped myself in the middle of the air. Then I blasted off into the air and rocketed down to earth. Smash Gal! A voice penetrated my mind. I pushed it out. Stop! You can't do this. Smash Gal, please. Kari! I stopped half a foot away from my enemy. Dust and debris scattered in my wake. I had my fist raised. He was cowering.

  "Fine!" I yelled. I grabbed the whimpering ball of super-villainy and punched him once. A love tap. He didn't pass out, but he did yelp. I brought him over to the police. They put the man in shackles. Not normal handcuffs. They were the size of my head! Because of all of the meta happenings in the city, the government had funded some special meta task forces, and they did their best. There were even some metas on the police, now. Professor Mind brought over a few more criminals and dropped them before a bemused police officer. I smiled at her, trying to ignore the heavy stare PM was giving me. "Thank you for all of your help."

  "Uh-huh," the cop said dismissively, grunting as she pulled up the set of aspirant villains, slapping the same shackles on them. The criminals' faces drained of blood and turned a sickly gray. I didn't know much about the restraints, but I was told they somehow disable powers. Somehow. That can't feel good. But if they wanted to keep their abilities intact, they just have to not break the law! I thought, smiling to myself. I finally turned to PM and felt my face heat up.

  "Smash Gal," He said sternly. "Come on, we have to talk. Thank you, officer."

  He blasted off. I smiled back at the cop who had turned her back to me in the meantime, then sighed and flew off after him. I caught up to him quickly. I think if he strained himself, he could fly as fast as I could. But he never did. He always knew how much force to use. He landed on the top of a building and sat down. The sun was bright and hot, especially in the costume; superhero costumes don't breathe. At all. Wonder if I can get mom to adjust this one. But it would probably become less durable if she did. And I don't want to end up naked. Not when everyone has a camera phone.

  "Kari," Professor Mind said, bringing me back to reality. "Sit."

  "I don't want another lecture," I said, sitting beside him.

  "And I don't want to give one. But you lost your temper again."

  "I was under control!"

The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.

  "You reached Mach 3. What would have happened if you had hit him flying that fast?"

  "He could have taken it! He was strong!"

  "He could have. But what about the street under him? The cars around him? The people who would be hit by the blast of air you're displacing. The building where glass would shatter."

  "I was controlling the amount of force that got out."

  "You were what?" He asked, dumbfounded.

  "I . . . I can create little forcefields to prevent stuff like that from happening. It's how I kept the glass from breaking on the buildings when I was coming down."

  "Huh. That's. . . An interesting ability. So, you're slightly telekinetic."

  "Yeah, I can't do anything like you can. But I can create little spaces to jump off, which helps hold things together when lifting something. And I create a little tube that stops my sonic booms from booming important stuff. It's pretty cool." He sighed and took off his domino, wiping his face. I tried not to stare. It was hard. He's really handsome. Like, I knew that because his mask only covers his eyes and a bit of his nose, but his eyes are soft and kind. Brown, like a doe.

  "Chuck, I'm sorry." He had told me his name after I had mentally shouted mine. He said I should also work on that, but it was hard. I wasn't used to being around telepaths.

  "Well," he began, pushing his hair out of his face. "No harm done, this time. But you still need to work on your temper. It's going to get you into trouble. Gods, it's hot. Do you want to grab an ice cream?" He asked, putting his mask back on.

  "Ice cream!" I screamed as I grabbed his hand and pulled him down to the ground the next instant. He screamed. But it was only like twenty stories; he's so dramatic! We landed perfectly safely, and I smiled at him. We got to the ice cream stand, and I paid. My mom had made a place for me to keep some petty cash. Which was good. You never knew when you were going to need it.

=== CURT ===

"These pictures have been all over Twitter," a woman read from a teleprompter with two photos hanging over her left shoulder. It was of Professor Mind and Smash Gal holding hands on the street and eating ice cream together. I sighed. How is this news? So what if two heroes decided to fuck? I thought. But people were really interested; this video had hundreds of thousands of retweets and likes. And I didn't have anything better to look at. I was taking the train to a shop where I could hopefully get some parts to rebuild my machine. It was really dangerous and stupid to teleport without the glasses. I didn't want to end up inside some wall. Or worse, half inside a wall and half out. That might cut me in half. "This has raised a lot of questions. Have Smash Gal and Professor Mind become Avalare's newest power couple? A lot of people certainly think so. We have brought on a local hero and friend of the potential couple, the Cannoneer. Jenny, what do you think? Are these two smashing?"

  "Look," Jenny said from her wheelchair, smiling at the reporter and the camera. "I would love to dish on Smash/Mind as much as the next girl, but they have not said anything to me. And I tried calling the Prof. He wouldn't return my calls."

  "Smash/Mind?"

  "Well, we have to call this ship something, and I think that's the best so far."

  "Okay. So there has been no official word on this from the two in question, but what do you think? Do you ship Smash/Mind?"

  "I don't think that's a fair question." Jenny grinned brightly. "I have a long history of shipping everyone. This time last year, I was shipping the villains Doctor X-Ray and CONcrete."

  "And you turned out to be right, there. It was confirmed that they were dating when you and Bion breached their compound and . . . Found them together."

  "Yeah, they're cute kids."

  "You are considered to be the ultimate romantic. One of the only openly polyamorous heroes out there. And you always seem able to predict these things, with 5 correct predictions under your belt. So, what do you think?" The reporter asked, leaning in with a slight smirk pulling at her mouth. "What does your gut say?"

  "I think there might be something there. Two young heroes, fighting together. I think that builds passion. But I don't want to say too much. If something happens between the two, I think that would be absolutely adorable. Still, I am not going to pressure them to do anything. But they did let me in on another rumor."

  "Oh? Do tell."

  "Well, they say they tried to foil a robbery done by another super-villain couple on the night they met."

  "Oooh. Who?"

  "The beautiful Buck Cherry and the elusive Esvanir," Jenny said, her grin widening somehow. Fuck. I was worried about this. I don't want Cherry to come after me just because people are getting the wrong idea.

  "Buck Cherry and Esvanir? Do you have a cute name for them as well?"

  "Well, I considered it, but there might be trouble in paradise. According to Smash Gal, BC just up and left Essy behind to deal with both of them."

  "But he still got away. Maybe it was a part of their plan." It really wasn't. It was part of her plan, and I knew it was her plan. Cindi doesn't like sticking around if things get complicated. So, it was hardly a surprise.

  "Maybe. Neither has ever been caught for long enough to be booked. Maybe they're helping each other, and that's why. But then again, neither of them have ever gone up against me. I could take them down." I gaped at my phone. I don't need Cherry to escape! I never have needed anyone to get out!

  The interview was interrupted by a pop-up screen. A picture of Cindi came up. She was calling. It was an artsy photo she had made me take for her. One of those nudes that doesn't show anything. I sighed and pressed accept.

  "Speak of the devil," I said before answering. "Hello?"

  "Oooh. You were thinking about me? Who could blame you, honestly? Essy, baby. How are you?" She said in her signature, slightly sultry, vaguely disinterested tone.

  "Cin, I'm well enough," I said hesitantly. I always had a hard time gauging her mood. "How're you?"

  "Oh, I'm pretty good. I am glad you got out safely," Cindi said somberly. "Sorry for legging it, but I figured we were outmatched."

  "We were. You made the right call. I wasn't too far behind you. Did you manage to get our cat home?" I asked. It was always so annoying speaking in code. But I was in public and couldn't speak clearly.

  "Yes, and her new owner was very pleased with the results. I still owe you your portion. Since I couldn't have done it without you," she said huskily. "We should meet. Grab a bite."

  "Dunno that that's a good idea, mon cheri," I said. "People might talk if we get together too often."

  "Oh, are you talking about the Cherr-Esvanir thing? I think it's cute. And it's not untrue. We are an item, sometimes."

  "Damn, I was hoping you hadn't seen that." I sighed. "And that name is awful. Worse than Smash/Mind for sure."

  "Yeah, I would have gone with CheSvy, personally. I'll see if I can't get that trending. Anyway, I want to see you. Get dinner. Get dessert. Maybe do an activity afterwards."

  "Well, I'm kind of grounded at the moment."

  "What do you mean? You haven't seen your parents in ten years. It's why I like you. We have that in common."

  "Well, I had another run-in with our new friend. She broke my . . . glasses. I'm working on getting a replacement, but the prescription is special order, and I need to go to a special shop for parts."

  "Our friend? Smashy?" She asked.

  "Yeah."

  "Oh, well. I could probably help you find a shop with the right parts. For a fee, of course."

  "Yeah, okay. You can take it out of the money you owe me."

  "Yeah. And we'll try to keep CheSvy on the DL this time."