Seren is lying on her bed with her dark thoughts and the hoodie that still smells like him. Her mind is a prisoner, trapped in a loop of problems without solutions, jumping from one to another like a dying man searching for water. There is no salvation, just the ticking of a clock and the noise of the campus.

Milo is dead, there is no solution.

She missed Monday’s competition and lost her sports scholarship, there is no solution. She had tried to negotiate, arguing that abduction and assault are an extreme case. She had bloodied her knuckles on the wall of bureaucracy, begged and hustled. To no avail.

Her mother is dead. There had never been a solution but she misses her now more than ever. Her mother would have known what to say, and when to keep silent.

Without the scholarship she may not be able to stay in Cornell at all. She has already emptied Milo’s place of her stuff and placed the key beneath the welcome mat for his ex wife to find. She had taken his favorite statue, a stylized ballet dancer cut from a single marble block. She had hidden it in her bag and ran home, feeling like a thief all the way. Or is it grave robber?

The welcome mat is a private joke between them. Was, a private joke. It says “nice panties” and is a reference to the first time she had worn a dress for him. Now the joke is gone and only the tasteless mat remains.

She could still get enough money. Cornell itself does not offer scholarships for athletes and it’s too late in the year anyway. Maybe another loan. That would be difficult with no collateral. She could eventually end up forced to beg her dad but, well, she cannot bear to talk to him right now. And she knows what his answer will be. He has not even called yet. Maybe he doesn’t even know.

If only the paths could lead her to a stash of money, but they are more literal. How do I live, how do I flee, where did he run, where will he strike are questions that work well. Lead me to a big stash of money doesn’t. Hopefully, she just needs a little bit more practice.

Her phone buzzes on the night stand. It’s Yuki asking her about tonight’s training session.

She cannot give up yet.

Seren pushes herself from her old mattress. Her body feels like it weighs a ton and it is not because of gravity. The whole world has become heavy, dull and so, so cold. In a way it is a good thing that her room feels so depressing or else she would not have been able to leave it.

The training room smells like plastic, detergent and old sweat. On the back, mats are placed for the benefit of the martial arts class, leading to an MMA ring. On her side, fencing lanes run parallel.

Seren stretches and moves, trying to relax the bruised muscles in her left shoulder. Exercise helps. Probably. It’s not exactly what the doctor ordered but staying in her room would have been a really bad idea. Fencing is liberating, requiring focus and running on muscle memory. Going through the motions itself brings back a sense of calm.

The maitre d’arme, a heavy set veteran called Salvador walks to her, his voice clear though his own mask. He is the only one wearing black.

"Yuki I need you to pair with Paige on this one. Seren, fence with Liam."

The very small amount of serenity and normalcy Seren had gathered in the past hour pops like a bubble.

Liam? Really? Really?

Even Yuki stops to stare at Seren, horror obvious in her posture.

“It will be fine.”

Yuki nods and walks away, just as she had when Seren had told her she was fine. They both know it’s a lie but Yuki will pretend to agree then still look after her.

But seriously, Liam.

Seren walks to her assigned lane and makes sure her body cord and electric vest work properly. If her electrified foil hits her opponent’s vest first, the box will detect it and award the point to her. This is particularly important when two fencers hit each other almost simultaneously as will happen very soon.

“Hey” says Liam.

Seren ignores him, feeling anger and tension build.

“I said hey”

“En garde”

Seren takes position and breathes deeply, centering herself.

“Pret”

It would have been easier with anyone but Liam.

“Allez”

Liam lunges as Seren knew he would, she parries a first thrust then another, on the third she deflects the tip of his blade and counter attacks, scoring a hit on his shoulder.

A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

The beep of the counting machine announces her victory, which doesn’t prevent Liam from ramming the foil in her breast. Thank God for protections.

“tsk, lucky hit”

Seren remais silent. On their second bout, Seren attacks herself, alternating thrusts and parries before landing a hit on his chest. Again, Liam shoves the foil in her breast even as the beep announces her victory.

“Ooops did I hit a boob?”

Seren breathes in and out. She wants to do something, it’s just that Liam has not broken any real rule yet and even if he did, she is not sure their referee-slash-teacher would do anything.

Liam is actually half decent, he is also their only serious male contender in the upcoming tournaments. The fact that he is a remorseless asshole does not seem to factor in.

The third bout is almost static, neither opponent lunging, until Liam circle parries one of Seren’s feint. Using the wasted movement she hits his shoulder and retreats before he can further aggravate her.

“Can you ever land an actual blow?”

Liam is known for thinking only crippling or killing blows should be counted. Seren wants to remind him that fencing is a sport and that if he wants to use a sword as a combat tool, he should invent a time machine. He would not listen of course. He cannot stand that anyone would be better than his own magnificent pampered self. The fact that Seren is a woman probably doesn’t help either.

“Three zero” she replies.

Liam bull rushes her and manages to lock guards with her, pushing both of their blades upward then rams his shoulder into her. As she staggers backward he hits her in the chest, at the exact same spot. The noise announces her technical defeat. The maitre d’arms remains silent. Surely he has noticed? The entire room is heavy with tension.

“Three one.”

Seren can almost see the ugly smirk on his handsome face behind the mask. With brown eyes, brown hairs and a square jaw, he looks like the young and successful professional in every stock photo. Or every man in the Bachelor. Seren is tempted to use the paths to fight him but… That would be cheating.

Liam rushes her again. Why change a winning strategy right? This time she flicks her blade, using its flexibility to hit him on the same shoulder, scoring yet another hit. He stops when his face mask is only a few inches away from hers.

"Liam, enough."

The tension in the room decreases when the maitre d’arme stays next to them monitoring the duel. Despite her exhaustion, Seren manages to win by a fair margin, less than the previous time, but she had done worse.

As expected, Liam does not salute her.

As they finish and Seven finally takes her mask off, Salvador comes to her and tell her in a low voice.

“I wish you guys played nice, you are the best we have. I need you to set an example.”

Seren is speechless. She just stares silently.

Later in the changing room, Yuki whispers:

“Wow if looks could kill…”

“I was just staring at him.”

"Then you have a no poker face whatsoever."

For the first time in five days, Seren gives a genuine smile. Yuki is genuinely nice, too nice for duels, in fact. She is much better that she lets on, but hates competition.

“I’m worried about you and Liam. You were not here on Monday but he lost it pretty bad in the semi finals. He’s been an absolute asshole since then. If you wait five minutes I will walk you back to your dorm”

“Nah it’s fine I need to get some food on the way anyway.”

The gym courtyard is lit by a lone lamp post, casting a sickly yellow radiance. The darker paths tell her before it happens. She turns around as Liam grasps for her shoulder.

"What do you want."

Seren is surprised that there is no fear in her voice, she is probably just still numb. After the hours of the past week end, how could a spoilt man child with a petty mentality scare her? Then again, he can harm her too, just not as easily.

“Don’t you think today’s fencing is geared toward cowards and weaklings?”

“Isn’t that good news for you?”

Liam’s eyes flash in terrible anger and for a moment, Seren believes that he will strike her here and there. Liam squares his jaw and manages to control himself, forcing back the parody of a smile. Seren realizes she has already taken a fencing guard position. Right foot forward.

As Liam prepares to open his fucking shit trap, the numbness that had smothered Seren for the past few days suddenly lifts, blown away by the fire of her rage.

Fuck him. And fuck the maitre d’arms for being a dickless piece of shit. And fuck her dad for being a gutless coward and a man whore. And fuck the monsters, and fuck that Turner guy for saving her worthless hide, who the fuck does he think he is? And fuck Milo. For leaving her on this rotting piece of garbage of a planet. Fuck everyone.

When Seren speaks she is so close to Liam’s face that she could lick it.

“You think you’re a true warrior huh? You think you’re the shit? You think you could beat me in a street fight? Put your money where your mouth is, I’ll fucking open you.”

Liam almost recoils but his pride an arrogance make him stand.

“You’re on, bitch.”

Seren looks around and finds what she expected. Someone once left a barrel full of bokken near the entrance. The long wooden swords shaped like katana are used by the kenjutsu class. Seren rushes in, grabs two and walks out. She doesn’t know what expression is on her face but given the terrified reaction of Paige, it’s not pretty.

And it’s about to get worse.

She throws one of the blades to Liam who catches it deftly. He looks surprised and vaguely worried. Reality not up to your taste pretty boy?

Taking her best demeaning voice she asks

“Are we ready yet?”

Liam gulps, realization catching up to him.

“Bring it.”

Liam should have shut his fucking face. Or he should have run. Now it’s too late.

Seren lunges as she refocuses all the paths on the duel. She feints right and immediately lowers her sword. Liam’s blade uselessly moves past to deflect a blow that would never come, her blade is already back up, pushing his blade further down before she puts all her strength in a reverse sweep. The very tip of the wooden stick catches Liam on the chin with a very satisfactory whack. Before he can recover she falls back then lunges and hit him in the sternum.

Liam recoils away in pain clutching his chest and brandishing the bokken ineffectually. As if that could stop her.

There is no pause in a real duel.

Seren presses the attack, dancing around him. She strikes his shoulder and his elbow in a quick succession before feinting high and lunging low, catching his tibia. Liam screams in pain but fights back, his face desperate.

Seren is the eye in the storm of her fury. For the second time in her life, she matches the paths and her skills. This time it comes more easily.

Seren lets Liam attempt to strike back, she parries all his pitiful thrusts without effort. She could have disarmed him at any time but she is not here to win, she is here to punish. As Liam’s efforts falter, she counter attacks twice, striking him in the chest and in the liver. Streams of tears roll down his cheeks.

Seren is the speed to his slow, the purpose to his hesitation and the ruthlessness to his fear. All the paths are white showing her what she could do, what she should do to satisfy her urge. She is powerful, in control. It is all so… Easy. She is not fighting, she is making a point.

Gathering his last remaining strength Liam bull rushes her as he had done in the gym, but this time there are no rules and Seren is more than ready. Throwing her weapon in a lazy arc, she lets his blade pass by her and shoves the pommel in Liam’s face, using his momentum against him.

With a sickly crunch, the handle hits Liam in the nose. He screams and finally collapses on his back.

A torrent of blood pours from his left nostril.

Seren grabs the handle with two hands. Time to bash his face in. Time to kill.

Two solids arm grab her from behind and she is propelled away. She rolls and is back on her feet in a heartbeat.

There is a strange man opening his mouth. He is not part of the fight. He is outside the paths.

The bubble of her focus pops, as does her anger. Reality beyond the duel rushes back to her senses. The man is Salvador and he is screaming at the top of his lungs

“WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!?”

His face displays a little bit of anger, and a lot of something Seren had never seen there before: fear. As if in slow motion her eyes take on the surroundings. Liam is on the ground, his nose is quite obviously broken, his face is already bruising. He is screaming in agony. Paige is crying. Yuki is in shock. A few other people have gathered, looking like they are witnessing a train wreck. In a way, they are. Worse, she can see a new cellphones recording the scene.

Seren’s stomach churn as she takes on the scene and realizes the likely consequences of her actions. Assault charges. Expulsion.

How?

She stands up. She is not going to cry in front of everybody. She walks back toward the gym.

“Where do you think you are going?”

“Inside.”

“You don’t belong inside.”

The maitre d’arme’s face is twisted with anger. Does he feel betrayed? Probably. Does Seren care?

Absolutely not.

“Are you going to stop me?”

Her voice drips with disdain. Pain registers on Salvador’s face as he realizes that he has lost all respect and authority. If only he knew how much of it is aimed at herself.

His eyes slide to her weapon, still in her hand and back to her face. In the end, he does nothing.

Coward.

Seren enters the girl’s changing room. The place feels completely alien now, and it’s likely the last time she will see it. It doesn’t matter. She cannot control it anymore.

Sobs wrack her and tears fall on her coat. She did not think she had any tears left but here we go. Losing the scholarship is the last of her worries now, she is lucky if she doesn’t lose everything.

A minute later, the door opens and closes and Yuki’s arms hug her. She hugs her back.