Bells rang as guardsmen scrambled to their positions. Off in the distance, howls and roars of beasts could be heard clear as day. The cloudy sky and light rain did nothing to silence those distant roars. One could only imagine what kind of creatures they belonged to.

“Flight of twenty is on the return! Lift gates in thirty and prep a welcome party!”

The officer on shift shouted to the garrison. The welcome party was not for the adventurers.

“How did they get so close!? What is the northern guard post doing!?”

Soon the hooves of twenty horses could be heard, and in the distance, the three Five Stripe teams into view. They were hard to make out thanks to all the detritus littering the ground and the forest of leafless trees obscuring the vision from atop the wall.

The gate began to rumble. The process was an intricate one – to keep out the beasts while still letting in returning expeditions. The timing had to be exact, else the city would either be breached, or the adventurers would be left stranded outside the walls.

The bells never stopped ringing as the guardsmen sat still, clutching their spears on the wall. On the other side of the gate was a small fortification with more soldiers, but other than that, the garrison was laughably small. Day time attacks was not the norm, and no one expected a large attack without warning from the outer guard posts. The soldiers who normally stood guard were asleep, and off duty, preparing for the night, when the beasts became more active.

The adventurers came racing through the open gate, their horse’s hooves kicking up mud and ripping through the soft ground with their gallop. The men who’d been lifting up the gate let go of the chains and the wheels, and the gate fell with a loud crash into the muddy dirt.

The soldiers, both on the ground within the city, and atop the walls, waited, and waited, holding their breaths, sweat rolling across their faces. Then, a thud. A loud, single, knock, on the other side of the gate. Then another, then another, it was like someone was trapped on the other side outside the walls, and wanted in.

However, the soldiers atop the walls could see it for themselves. There wasn’t a single thing in front of the gate, or outside the wall at all for that matter; but the knocking persisted.

…

They’d made it back to Pūshkinskaya in one piece. As their mounts slowed, breathing heavily, no crowd formed around the returning adventurers as Alisson had expected. There were no greetings, no jeers, nothing. The slums were barren, like nobody lived there. A second glance at the dark shadows within the broken houses and destitute alleys and only then Alisson could see life; if he were to count the few people poking their heads out, staring at the adventurers, as humanity. They were so disheveled and dirt ridden, so plagued and bruised, he wasn’t sure that he could call them human.

“Hey! Stripes! What’s going on out there?”

An officer shouted to the adventurers. Along with a dozen spearmen, he huddled behind a makeshift barricade facing the closed gate.

The leader of Auburn looked to the officer with dark eyes.

“The northern guard post, it’s been destroyed.”

The officer stared at the adventurer for a moment, before shakily nodding his head. He waved over a few horsemen.

Word would be sent to the other guard posts to be on alert, and the Guild would be notified, and additional soldiers conscripted and roused from their bunks, so that humanity could reclaim their territory in the coming days.

Alisson had seen the guard post with his own eyes. The men that once sat around the campfire, waving to the passing adventurers as they’d left Pūshkinskaya a week ago…Their bodies were but black desiccated hulks across the ground now. It was not the work of the normal beasts, they torched and burned, no, the camp itself was fine…but its defenders were but hollow husks. Only the devil knows what happened there.

“…Shouldn’t we help?”

Celis muttered, staring at the scrambling soldiers.

“No point. We’d only get ourselves killed. The city knows what it’s doing, let the garrison handle it.” Dane replied. “For now, we need to report to the Guild, and tell them about our findings.”

Alisson couldn’t help but stare at the desolate streets, wondering if this was future for all of humanity’s towns. Surely, the world wouldn’t wither away in atrophy such as this.

…

“And that’s a hundred-seventy-five gold pieces for the contract, plus the extra seventy for the Breach kill, that makes a thirty-five split for all of you.”

The team’s advisor, Presír, said, putting seven jangling brown pouches on the table.

“We would’ve gotten an extra couple hundred if we destroyed the hive…”

Amelathet muttered, staring at the pouch in front of her.

“Oh, come now, your life is worth more than some coin. Besides, you’ll probably get a heck of a bonus with what you’ve found, so cheer up.”

Presír said, smiling.

The teams had been split up into different rooms to all give their sides of the story to the Guild staff one at a time, as per norm. This was a for a few reasons, chiefly for honesty about what was found out and making sure the right teams were rewarded. Because of this, the three Five-Stripe teams hadn’t actually conversed about what took place during the assault. A few talks on talks on tactics and general locations took place, but other than that, Dane had been quick to inform himself and Celis that information was a commodity in the adventurer business, and to not spill anything about what they’d seen.

Because of this system, the general public was also left relatively in the dark, as information was more separated and kept in cells, all coalescing in the Guild’s research team, from whence they did not let much out.

Amelathet’s ears suddenly stood up, and then Alisson heard approaching footsteps from outside the door.

“Looks like Mr. Brasden will see you now.”

Presír said, bowing and shuffling to the side of the room. The door to the small meeting room opened, and in walked a large man. He was clearly a former adventurer from his muscle, but his portly chin and large belly signaled that he’d been out of action for quite some time. The clothes he wore were much fancier than anything Alisson had seen in Pūshkinskaya. His small mustache was very reminiscent of nobility. It looks like anyone who worked with the Guild proper – Presír included – were well endowed.

Mr. Brasden stared at the adventurers for a moment before proceeding further into the room. He was probably looking at how dirty Crimson was. Rolling around in black mystery sludge would do that. His and Celis’s cloaks were ripped up, and muddied, and in a generally horrible condition. Alisson hadn’t taken any wounds during the expedition, Celis however, her armor would need to be fixed up. The rest of Crimson’s gear were in similar states of damage, Rei being the only one who, like Alisson, had no punctures in their armor. Amelathet’s clothing was ripped up, apparently due to Celis’s frantic first aid. On impulse, Alisson handed her a spare cloak he had from his stallion, which she now wore over her barely held together jacket.

If somebody said Amelathet almost died days prior, it would of came off a as a practical joke. The adventurers, all twenty of them, after three days, were all able to fully recover thanks to medics like Patsel, leaving only the scars and dirt on their armor as a reminder of what had happened.

He hadn’t spoken to her privately on the matter yet – How Celis risked her life for Amelathet. He needed Celis’s side of the story; just what was she thinking in saving Amelathet? Unfortunately, Alisson hadn’t been able to speak privately yet about anything that had happened in the hive with Crimson looming over their shoulders.

Mr. Brasden took a seat in front of the standing adventurers, and Dane proceeded to speak for the team, and recount what had happened.

“…There were flying insects, came in swarms, and they weren’t friendly to the hive’s beasts. I saw it firsthand – They were fighting each other, the Guardians were actively trying to destroy the bug nest; but in the end, our little ole’ Ferris set the place ablaze when she rescued Amelathet. I’m pretty sure the nest is burnt to a crisp, but we don’t know for sure.”

Dane went on about the specifics of the beasts for some time, before calling Rei and Alisson up to speak.

“…A large stone building. Covered in some kind of hard substance. We found ample traces of human intervention there – A stairway, doors, debris and a floor system and room layouts…it just doesn’t make any sense why humans were ever down there…”

Rei said, slowly shaking her head.

“Were you able to retrieve any samples?” Mr. Brasden asked.

“I’m afraid not.” Rei replied. “Too dangerous a place, and the junk on the floor wasn’t exactly worth picking up. But…” She trailed off, setting her eyes on Alisson. “How about you tell him about what we saw?”

Alisson looked to her, and took the opportunity to omit a detail.

“We ran into some sort of creature there, humanoid but not Guardians, they didn’t attack, and they weren’t Sequiturs. They had these human looking faces, long necks, large mouths, looked more like hairless gorillas or apes than beasts. They stared us down in one of the corridors, like they were testing us, but they left, and we didn’t have to fight them. On the way out, there were Guardians waiting for us…But out of the sky, probably from out of the structure far above, those same creatures dropped down, and started attacking the Guardians; They ripped them apart with their bare hands, cracked skulls with their jaws alone – We had front row seats.”

Everyone was staring at Alisson and Rei with bated breath, apparently intimidated by the story of the empty building and the creatures that roamed that halls in silence.

Mr. Brasden let out a murmur of intrigue, evidently not scared in the slightest.

“So, a three-way brawl is what I’m hearing. Three different factions, none of them human, all fighting against one another…this is certainly an interesting development. Now, Ferris was it? Please continue, on this, nest, Dane was speaking of…”

Celis’s eyes shot wide in nervousness, but she quickly swallowed a gulp and started to uneasily recount her detour to rescue Amelathet. The whole teamed listened with quiet awe, as Celis had stayed silent on it, even Alisson was surprised by her actions. The quick mind she displayed and combat prowess, all whilst fighting in the dark like that…

“Then…I…knowing that…well…that the nest looked flammable, and that the bugs were weak against my heated baselards…I tried to, start a fire when I left…”

“And the nest went up like a star! Oh ho~! That’s some fine work!”

Mr. Brasden said with jubilee, and reached out his hand to Celis’s shoulder. Without thinking Alisson grabbed Mr. Brasden’s hand, stopping it from reaching his apprentice. Alisson did this with a blank face. Brasden stared at Alisson for a moment, before promptly clearing his throat and withdrawing his hand, leaving the room silent and the adventurers staring at Alisson. The apparent good mood having been soured; the report continued quickly.

“But anyway…That figure that you described, both as Ferris saw it in the hive and as everyone saw it when you were leaving, you weren’t the only ones to see it. All the other teams reported sightings like that.” The room’s silence seemed to thicken. “Did you notice any pattern of beast attacks when you saw it? Or perhaps any sort of, feelings, you might have had?”

The adventurers were silent for a moment.

“Yeah…” Amelathet started, looking like she a had bone to pick. “There was this annoying-ass hum.”

The rest of Crimson nodded in confirmation. Mr. Brasden sighed.

“I shouldn’t be telling you this, but I think you ought to know what that thing is. We’ve been keeping a lid on this information because it’s half theory and half speculation, so I expect you all to keep your mouths shut to make sure it stays that way.”

Everyone nodded sternly.

“…We call it a Darkwalker. A humanoid, around ten to twenty feet tall with long appendages; that’s about it physically. We’ve never seen one up close to get the details, or at least, no one has and lived to report it.”

The adventurers were in a tense silence, Alisson included. He strained his ears to listen; Sidonia didn’t research beasts or venture into the tunnels – He and the rest of Sidonia didn’t know much about beasts. Leeching off the humans’ perils for knowledge was a cherry on top for infiltrating the adventurer caste.

“So? Is it just some sort of field commander?”

Berein asked.

“Not necessarily. We only know a few definitive traits for them. Whenever there is a hive, there is a Darkwalker. But whenever there is a Darkwalker, does not imply that there is a hive.”

“It sounds like they maintain hives.”

Rei remarked.

“Now that’s jumping to theories.” Brasden butted in quickly. “The hard outer shell of a hive, we believe that a Darkwalker rests within – They are the hives, they are the intelligence behind the beasts, that’s the overall thinking the research division has been theorizing.”

The adventurers were silent, but the staffer continued on.

“So, in essence, destroying a hive kills the Darkwalker if they happen to be inside, but if they’re not inside when that happens, they are left homeless. We don’t know what affect this has on it, and why don’t just remake the hive, they seem to just disappear afterwards from the area for some reason. We’ve seen them on the surface too, they ambush adventurers once every decade or so– very rarely, but still, they aren’t confined to the depths.”

A moment of silence followed.

“Is that it?”

Rei asked.

“Yes, that’s all we can put into words so far. The noise you heard, their influence over other beasts, everything else is speculation on our part. There’s a theory going around the researchers that perhaps the reason why we lost four teams to that hive, why they were even there, was because they were drawn in due to some kind of psychic powers by the Darkwalker, it only sounds more reasonable hearing that you experienced an amnesiac blackout, very clearly orchestrated by the Darkwalker of the that hive from what it sounds like.”

Mr. Brasden shook his head.

“But, that’s all for now. Thank you for your hard work, you’ve done a great job this time, even taking into account your inability to destroy the hive, you’ve recovered valuable information and destroyed that Breach as well. You’ll be compensated handsomely, but that’s for the team managers to handle in the coming days. In the meantime, we’ll start planning a follow-up attack on that hive, this time with more firepower. Its designation heading forward will be Eigert-5.”

With those words, finally, the meeting was over, and Celis and him and the rest of Crimson were freed from that room after almost two full hours of talk. He’d almost dozed off at the more boring parts.

“Alright everyone, as usual we’ll be off for a day to rest.” Dane said, his hands on his hips. “We’ll meet at the hub in the morning to go on a shopping trip to restock our supplies and items. Until then, have a good rest everyone.”

As Crimson began to leave, Alisson was quick to approach Amelathet.

“I’m happy to fully reimburse you for the items that you lost due to my sister.”

Celis had apparently, in a frantic attempt to leave the hive, exhausted an unconscious Amelathet out of her items.

“I-I couldn’t-!” Amelathet stammered, waving her hands. “She saved my life after all…I wouldn’t feel right…”

A heavy thud was heard as Alisson placed a pouch of coin on the table, the money him and Celis had made from the contract.

“I wouldn’t feel right either.”

Alisson said, and turned away before Amelathet could object. Celis had told him what she’d learned about Amelathet, Alisson didn’t feel bad giving away their earnings to her. The money was nothing compared to what Celis and him already had.

The Guild Hub on the upper floors was far quieter than the lower and larger room. The maze of halls and windows reminded him of Sidonian architecture. The only sounds consisted of the light rain hitting the windows, and every so often a door could be heard opening or closing around a corner. Other than the gentle hum of talk, it was quiet. As soon as him and Celis entered the lower chamber, that all changed with the torrent of adventurers bantering in the much larger base room.

“Hey, I didn’t know Crimson got another new member!”

An adventurer jeered from the side, apparently mocking Celis’s stained hair. Alisson halted, and turned toward the direction the voice had come.

“Hey, show some respect asshole.”

Before Alisson could act, Amelathet shoved past the adventurer who had mocked them, pushing them almost off their feet.

As Alisson started to walk forward again, he could hear the adventurer’s teammates whisper,

What the hell are you thinking! Those are Five-Stripes!

“Hey, Ferris, s-slow down a little will you?”

Berein suddenly called out from behind them, and again him and Celis turned.

“Ehehe…It’s just that you walk so fast and all I can barely keep up…”

“What is it?”

Celis asked with an unamused face and scornful tone.

“It’s just that, well, me, Amelathet and Patsel are going to the bath house later and I thought that maybe you’d want to join.”

Berein said, smiling. Amelathet was next to Berein, with her hands on her hips, also smirking, as if expectantly awaiting Celis’s answer.

“That won’t be necessary.”

Alisson said sharply, before starting to turn away. Berein pouted at Alisson in response.

“Jeez Alavier, let the kid speak for herself.”

Amelathet said, irked. Alisson scoffed, and with a shrug he started to walk away.

“N-no thank you.”

Celis swiftly bobbed her head at the two and was quick to follow Alisson away.

Once the two of them were outside, with nobody breathing down their necks, Celis finally asked,

“What now? Should we restock our supplies?”

Alisson shook his head.

“That can wait. Right now, we need to talk. There’s a place outside walls that I saw, we should be in private there.”

Alisson said simply.

“Eh? Oh…Ah…hehe…hehe…”

Celis jittered behind him. Alisson’s brow furrowed at the odd reaction but pushed it out of his head as a mishearing in this harsh weather.

Pulling the hoods of their cloaks over their heads to protect against the rain, the two of them walked into the streets of Pūshkinskaya. With their muddied cloaks, they looked just like any other resident. The rain falling upon the top of his hood and the muddy ground bellow was the loudest sound in the city, second only by the rushing wind. Most of the residents were not on the streets, as they were taking cover from the thickening gray clouds above. Word had probably spread about the northern guard post, people were probably anticipating an attack.

“Why doesn’t the garrison concentrate all their manpower in the city? It looks like they’re just overextending and spreading themselves thin.”

Celis asked him.

“Because…Well, it’s easier to explain it this way…The guards at the northern post did their job no?”

“What do you mean?”

“They died, and in doing so alerted the inner city of a threat. It’s a ring of canaries that surround this city; Not a ring of defenders.”

…

Alisson wanted to find someplace secluded, however no such place existed in a town like this. Every alley could hold a potential eavesdropper, every ruined building too destroyed to conceal speech. He wanted to go outside the walls. He’d seen a cave on the ride in that looked isolated. So as the wind and rain picked up in intensity, they approached the wall of Pūshkinskaya.

“Hey! You there! What are you doing? You shouldn’t be so close to the walls.”

An officer was quick to make a beeline for the two of them.

“We’re Five-Stripe Adventurers, we’re just taking a walk is all.”

Alisson replied nonchalantly, as if what he was doing was perfectly fine. The officer sighed.

“Yes, I know you two, Alavier and Ferris are you? Just a word of advice kid, don’t call yourself a Five-Stripe after only one contract with a team, it’s scummy.”

Alisson frowned, but the guard still continued.

“Normally I’d let you adventurers out but, with the storm coming in and, well, haven’t you heard? The northern guard post was destroyed – It’s not safe out there. No one comes in, no one gets out, not under these circumstances.”

“…I understand. Good day.”

Alisson began to turn away when the guard stopped him.

“Now I can’t exactly stop you from getting out anyway but, it’s dangerous out there, so be careful.”

“We always are.”

Alisson said, and shrugged the guard’s hand off his shoulder.

The guard wasn’t wrong. Within the next fifteen minutes, him and Celis were outside the city, having found a gap in patrols and easily vaulting the walls. The walls were not as tall as Daigoro’s, nor as sturdy – Though it was evident that they’d seen much more action from their blood stains and shattered segments.

“So, what are we going to do?”

Celis asked, Alisson could hear something odd about her. She sounded smug. Alisson remained silent until they reached the cave he’d seen before. Sure enough, after a flashing a mage light around, it seemed to be a small grotto. There was a small body of clear water in the grotto.

Only then when the two of them were outside the city, and out of the open, did Alisson feel safe conversing while they were undercover. The darkness here would help with it as well.

“Celis. There’s something I need to teach you. While I was in that building…I realized that the answer to our problems of the supernatural have been under my belt the whole time…I saw the unexplainable, but it proved useful…”

Alisson said, laying his eyes squarely on his apprentice’s.

“What do you mean?”

“Those creatures, they reacted to life, to breath, to emotion,” Alisson took a step toward Celis, and laid his hands over her shoulders. “There is a way to subvert the likes of them yet…You must die.”

Celis cracked a wry smile, and scoffed. Alisson was slightly dubious of her tone and attitude. There was something off about it.

“Alright then…”

She gently closed her eyes, and parted her lips, leaning forward toward him. Alisson just barely managed to wrap his hands under her armpits to stop her from falling. He held her up.

“Not like that you idiot! What are you thinking! Dunce!” Alisson shot of trio of insults on instinct.

Her eyes shot open, darting side to side in a fit panic and confusion.

“I was, I thought-!”

“Forget it. Calm down, but this time loosen your mind and not your muscles.”

“R-right-!”

She shut her eyes and stood on her own.

“Don’t reply to me. Just follow my voice.”

“…”

She did as she was told. Alisson waited for a moment as her heartrate lowered. He let go of her.

“Listen to wind outside, listen how it howls against the trees and splashes against the rocks…You must become as inanimate, as lifeless, as hollow, as dead, as the world around you. Take a deep breath…”

Her mouth parted and her chest rose.

“Exhale. But do not inhale afterward. Keep your lungs empty.”

Her stomach sank into her as she exhaled long and heavy.

“Focus on the ground under your feet, and the cold metal surrounding your body.”

As a minute passed, the color started to drain out of her face, and she started to tremble.

“Now, inhale in a steady and slow stream…”

Her chest started to rise slowly over the course of another minute, until she held her breath.

“When you next exhale, know that you are exhaling your very life out of your body…when you next breathe, you will be but a corpse no different than the stone rock at your back…As inanimate as the muddy ground from which the rain falls upon…”

Alisson spoke softly, intensely observing his apprentice’s every move. Celis waited for a moment like that. Then, she exhaled.

Partway through her exhale however…

“Tch…heh, hahaha!”

She broke into a chuckle and then a laugh. Alisson’s eyes widened, furious.

Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

“I’m sorry, I just can’t, I can’t take you seriously when-!”

Alisson’s open palm impacted on her cheek. Celis stumbled back, almost falling over. She look up to Alisson, shocked.

“This isn’t the time for playing around, you, you insolent!” Alisson turned away, and then muttered, “First you disobey orders and now you can’t even keep a straight face…”

Celis scrambled back in front of Alisson, her cheek red from Alisson’s slap.

“Disobeyed orders? When have I ever done that!?”

She asked, suddenly alarmed. Alisson turned back to Celis with a snarl.

“…When you went off willy-nilly into the dark to go save some good-for-nothing adventurer!

“I was…I was following your orders.”

She made a confident stand, looking up to him with a stern face. Alisson tilted his head at her frowning.

“So I didn’t mishear you then...When exactly did I tell you…” Alisson looked down, then suddenly looked back up, an eye twitching and in a louder voice said, “To risk your life!?”

Celis’s eyes widened.

“I…I…you said so…”

She meekly mumbled.

“What? When did I say anything like that?”

Alisson leaned in with a demanding tone.

“You said…when we were in the tunnels and the floor came out…You said that-”

“I said that we need them for Freigat! Does that mean that you should risk your life for a disposable resource!? If I gave you a scroll would you really kill yourself to preserve it!? The adventurers are a resource, nothing more than items! That’s all forgetting the fact that you broke my orders to not use your attack spells! Without them you would’ve died! You shouldn’t have put yourself in odds like that to have to use them! You’re lucky Amelathet wasn’t paying attention to you or you could’ve compromised both of us!”

The expression drained out of Celis’s face. Her terror slowly turned into a blank impassivity for whatever reason, and her shoulders slumped.

“Celis, my apprentice…” Alisson backed off, massaging his temples, “Your life is not replaceable…Others may die, we cannot. As long as we are alive we can continue the mission…Sidonia cannot send reinforcements…we have to make do with what we have.”

They were both silent for a long while. Celis was simply staring at the ground, with a dark expression.

…

“Celis, my apprentice…” Alisson backed off, massaging his temples, “Your life is not replaceable…Others may die, we cannot. As long as we are alive we can continue the mission…Sidonia cannot send reinforcements…we have to make due with what we have.”

Alisson started to sound as though he was mumbling to himself, like he was going crazy. He sounded like he was at the head of an army, like in some delusional way me and him were equivalent to a strike force on a battlefield.

I’m not able to think very hard. Not with my stomach wrapping around itself, choking my lungs and forcing my throat shut. Prickles formed on my back, and I felt itchy all around. I consciously knew I was stressed, so much so that I couldn’t act or think. I could only see Alisson’s scornful face before me. In the dark like this, I can’t help but come to the conclusion that this is just who Alisson is…He doesn’t care. All he cares about is the mission…I just happen to apart of it…

I suddenly wanted to cry, to bawl my eyes out for an eternity. Not into anyone’s shoulder or embrace. I just wanted to be back in my bunk at the Academy, late at night, crying into pillow. Maybe then I wouldn’t be living a life of such desperation and pathetic deception. That’s all it is…I was just desperate, being alone…I…

Tsuhara’s face suddenly popped into my mind.

That kind of guy? -He’s the type that would never make a move.

I remembered her words, and it hit me that I was being quite short-sighted…When Alisson took me out of the city…I thought he was…That he was going to…That’s I way I acted like that…Acting like he was going to kiss me…

Hah…That was really stupid…And then even after that…I thought all his talk about trying to teach me something was just an act too…But after seeing his outburst…I know that I played my cards too riskily.

I remembered the way he just talked to me…I was too shocked in the moment but thinking back on it…He really sounded delirious…Like that wasn’t Alisson.

Pfft…That is Alisson, I’m just being an idiot.

-No! Shut up! I’m wrong and I know it! I know that Alisson’s been a little off his rocker ever since we came in contact with Lavjoure…He’s…he’s just a little screwed up in the head from all the stress…right…

Thinking like that, I can’t be beaten by the ailment of a friend. I can overpower him. I know I can. I gradually pull myself up from the sudden depression that’d hit me following Alisson’s outburst, and with a deep breath I calmed myself.

I remembered his words: ‘Your life is not replaceable…Other may die, we cannot…’

“Alisson.” Before he could even recognize my start, I continued, “You’re a hypocrite.”

I looked up toward the cave ceiling.

“You can’t worry so much about my life and then go charging in without a thought for your own…That’s being unfair…”

Alisson looked at me. Even though it was only a minute since he last spoke, it looked as though he’d been silent for an eternity.

“I can handle myself. You cannot. You’re inexperienced-”

“I thought you said you were weak. Remember?” I cut him off, knowing exactly what he would say in first place.

Alisson’s eyes widened.

“Shut up!” He slashed his hand out in front of him, like trying to cut down my words. “That’s was- I mean, I was…” His eyes were darting around, as if trying to find his words for him. He let out an angry burst of air through his nose, before turning away toward the entrance of the cave. “Clean up already. No apprentice of mine is so filthy such as you.”

Clumsily changing the subject, he hurried out of the grotto. I stood there, frowning at him for a long moment. I wasn’t angry with him; I was just disappointed.

…

“‘Following orders’…’Not being able to handle myself’…Tch!”

Alisson muttered to himself. Out in front of the cave, with his arms crossed and a foot against the wall, the rain poured down unto his ripped cloak.

“It’s like she becomes more and more insubordinate as the hours go by!”

Alisson shouted to himself. The roaring rain and howling wind ate up his words, and he almost couldn’t hear himself.

“To think I let such an insolent naïve girl share a bed with me-! To think she saw me cry-! To think she coddled me-! To think-! To think-!”

Alisson took a deep breath.

Calm down, calm down. I don’t need to make a fool of myself. I suppose she is around that age after all, it’s not a wonder that she’d be a little rebellious.

To think his own apprentice went against his word. Him, Alisson Vi Nuam, Field Marshal and esteemed commander of the 51st. It was mortifying that he was so open and soft with such a lowly apprentice. A sudden flood of memories assaulted him.

“No, no…I can’t think about my past actions right now…”

He laid a hand to his forehead. He could feel it for himself, for whatever reason he wasn’t thinking straight. He didn’t know what was wrong, just that something was wrong. He chocked it up to anger, and left it at that. Shoving his pride away, he decided to just not think about what Celis had said to him; it’d only tick him off more, he thought to himself.

“Only the wicked or the moronic forget the past, good sir.”

Alisson heard a voice amidst the falling rain and howling wind, and peeked open an eye. He saw a person dressed in long torn cloaks meters away. Their face was obstructed by wrappings and Alisson couldn’t see a hint of skin from the man. He knew it was a man due to the voice, and speaking in rough Phrengari, with his throat coarse and sore, it sounded as though the man hadn’t spoken in years.

Just a drifter is all. Such filth is commonplace in the north.

“And only the wicked or the moronic go poking around where they don’t belong. Flee, els’st you’ll have a more than pretty words gouged into that throat of yours.”

Alisson said, still with his arms crossed, guarding the cave.

“Quite so, steel may I presume? Or some sort of mystical magic that you folks possess?”

“What’s it to you?”

“Why I’m only asking if you’d be interested in my wares…I’m a bit of collector you see, and I spot some valuable trinkets on thou.”

“I’m not interested, and you shouldn’t be either, now flee if you know what’s good for you, tramp.”

“Pfft…Whatever. Suit yourself.”

The drifter turned away and walked into the pouring rain, disappearing into the howling storm. Alisson closed his eyes again, and began thinking to himself.

Well I suppose Celis won’t be learning my skills anytime soon…I guess it’s not exactly something that can be learned so quickly, for I have years of experience in that god-forsaken forest under my belt, she does not.

Suddenly thinking about what to teach his apprentice got his mind rolling again and off the topic of their earlier interaction.

She still needs some pointers on throwing, some footwork corrections…but her swordplay is topnotch, textbook even…her tactics are, unorthodox, but thinking outside the box is a good trait…Her magic isn’t something I can very much teach, as she is the prodigy with all the mana, I’m but a farce in that department…She does have that book, the grimoire on the Telepathy spell, perhaps I can try teaching her a little of it tonight. No, I’m a terrible magic teacher. Sewing. Yes, I can show her how to patch up her gambeson and I can lecture her on armor, that would be more productive…

Hmph. Will she even listen to me with that attitude she displayed back there?

Alisson shook his head.

I don’t know. Whatever. All insubordination aside, she did do well in the hive, very well. She held out for herself, acted for herself…I can’t say that she didn’t act in the mission’s favor by saving an asset of ours…It’s just, I don’t like the idea that she just goes off by herself like that…It’s too dangerous, too risky…I don’t want to lose her…

“Alisson, I’m done.”

Alisson was expecting a pull on his cloak or a hand on his shoulder with Celis’s words. For some reason he felt that was missing.

Alisson turned to Celis. The armor under her cloak was much more cleanly that before, and her skin no longer had the grime and dirt or the sludge of the outside upon it.

“The green didn’t come out then?”

Celis shook her head.

“It probably will with time. Tomorrow, the Freigat expedition is expected to return, so we’ll wait until then to make any further plans. Now come, we can’t be outside the city walls come night time. We both know how many beasts come out at night.”

Hordes of them. They loved roaming the surface at night like that, in their thundering swarms across the north.

…

The storm had passed by the time him and Celis had made it inside the city once more. The sun was setting. They’d made a stop to the same smithy Alisson had gone to the week prior, and dropped off Celis’s steel to be fixed up. Alisson’s armor was fine. Celis still had cuts in her gambeson – gambeson that was infused with Lavjoure’s metal string – He’d rather not show that to anyone and so he’d rather patch up the gambeson himself. Surprisingly, the metal wire hadn’t been ripped at all, it was surprisingly durable – It was the fabric that needed a patch job. So after dropping off the armor, they’d gone to the stables to retrieve some sewing supplies and the like.

They both now walked through the Guild Hub with the armoring tools in hand. Because of the lateness of the night, the floor of the hub was far sparser with adventurers. Because of this, it wasn’t hard to see Berein approach the both of them.

“What were you doing out so late?”

“Errands. What about you, hm?”

Berein rolled her eyes.

“Jeez nothing bad. I was just out with Amela and Patsel s’all.”

Apparently interpreting Alisson’s rhetoric as a jab, she crossed her arms with a smile.

“I just got back. Amela and Patsel live out in the slums you see.”

Celis stepped in front of Alisson. It was simple motion, but Alisson did not order it. He immediately became suspicious.

“Hey, Berein, I was meaning to ask you tonight…” Celis said, sounding very confident and outgoing, which shocked Alisson. She was being so assertive, that was unlike her. Celis reached a hand into her cloak and withdrew a black book. “…I have this grimoire I’ve been needing to learn, it’s about the telepathy spell, I thought maybe you could give me a few pointers?”

Celis tilted her head with a smile.

Alisson’s mouth dropped open, speechless. What was she doing? What the hell was Celis doing!?

Berein rose a finger with a smile.

“You read my mind. I wanted to ask if you could show me some things about the 2nd tier of the regeneration spell. Maybe we can swap?”

“Mm! Sounds good!”

Celis nodded her head.

Alisson stared; his eyes wide. It was happening right before him, but he almost couldn’t comprehend it.

“Alright, it’s a sleepover then!”

Berein said, tightening a hand in apparent victory.

“Y-yeah I, I guess so.”

Celis said warily as the two of them walked off.

…

…

…

Alisson was left in silence. The two of them were long gone, but yet he stood there like a statue.

Although his mind was away, his body felt the suspicious stares of the other adventurers piercing his cloak, without Celis by his side they suddenly seemed far scarier to him. He started walking away toward their room, the stares of the adventurers driving him away on instinct.

His mind was spinning circles around itself. She really just up and left like that? Without even asking or telling him anything? All on her own?

He felt like he should’ve stopped her. After all that high and mighty thinking back there at the cave, he should’ve easily been able to reach out his hand and stop her…But he didn’t. He couldn’t. Why was that? Why? Why was he suddenly so indecisive?

…She must’ve taken the grimoire from her mare while they were getting the sewing supplies. He didn’t even see her grab it. She must’ve planned it all in advance. Like a switch, Alisson’s mind stopped turning for a few moments. He arrived at his and Celis’s room, let himself in, closed the door behind him, and then sank down to the floor, his back sliding across the door.

His eyes were wide. He almost forgot to breath. It was so surreal, it felt like he could blink and realize that it was just a dream. But no, it wasn’t a dream. Alisson was wanting it to be. He thought in his head about what to do. He’d retreated back to his room on instinct, not knowing what to do immediately.

He reckoned that perhaps he should just go out, find Celis, and speak with her. That was the most reasonable thing to do. The problem was, Alisson didn’t know where they had gone off to; In the moment of shock Alisson had, he hadn’t been paying attention. The idea of roaming the Guild dorms, without a clue where she could be, was, in that moment, terrifying to Alisson. Alone in his room, he didn’t want to think about being in public like that.

Alisson tightened his grip on himself.

“Hah…Why am I being so dramatic?”

He looked up to the ceiling.

“It’s not a big deal…I guess just fix up Celis’s gambeson on my own then...”

Against his better judgement, his impulsive mind acted. He locked away his reasoning, as if to pretend that nothing had happened. It was easier to stay put. Besides, it’s not like Celis did anything inherently dangerous…No assertive power came to him because of that. She was just acting on her own, why was he making such a big deal of it?

So he rose up, and for a good hour following that, milled about, mindlessly sewing Celis’s gambeson. He listened the roar of the wind on the window to the room, and it felt quite chilly inside, evidently because it’d gotten very cold out. In the north, especially over the past week, the temperatures at night were dropping. If you weren’t next to a fire or wrapped in coats, you could easily freeze; Snow would be arriving in the coming days.

Alisson thought mindlessly, sewing.

…

After another half hour, Alisson leaned back, and held the gambeson in front of him, a job done. He laid the gambeson across the table, and, there being nothing else to do, got ready for bed. He blew out the candle, and the room turned black.

With the room drenched in darkness, the only light came from the moonlight that pierced the singular window.

“Alright Celis, it’s – Ah-”

He said it without thinking as he turned his head back to the rest of the room; But in doing so he remembered he was the only one there.

“…right…”

He muttered to himself, his shoulder’s slackening. He sighed and fell back onto the bed, his hands over his forehead, staring up at the ceiling.

For a few minutes, he thought about what had happened over the course of the day. Something he’d yet to do. He hadn’t looked back, he’d just been thinking in the present tense.

‘Not like that you idiot! What are you thinking! Dunce!’

Alisson swallowed hard, hearing his own words. He berated his apprentice? For such a minor mistake?

‘I said that we need them for Freigat! Does that mean that you should risk your life for a disposable resource!? If I gave you a scroll would you really kill yourself to preserve it!?’

He’d twisted Celis’s intentions. She was just following orders. Orders that he failed to clarify, and that broadly extended over her as a result. She had been in a double bind. If she returned to Alisson having abandoned Amelathet, she probably thought there was a chance he would be angry with her.

‘I’m sorry, I just can’t, I can’t take you seriously when-!’

He saw right before his eyes his hand slam into her face.

He hit her. When Alisson remembered that, his eyes shot wide open and his stomach churned. He saw her face, looking up at him after his outburst, utterly confused and scared. He reached out his hands toward the ceiling, in a cold sweat.

“I…I s-should’ve apologized…”

Alisson said, his voice shaky. He suddenly wanted to hold her close, and comfort her, wipe away her terror and shock.

“W-why? Why did I…W-was I really so full of myself?”

‘I thought you said you were weak. Remember?’

He saw Celis tilting her head at him, with a stern expression.

Those words shot through him. Like a needle through his heart, it came to him why he’d been so stupid. It happened two weeks ago, but the memory shot through him clearly:

“‘I’m weak! I’ve been ignoring it until now, but the truth is right before me!’

He slammed his clenched gauntlet into the tree bark in anger. His eyes were burning.

‘I’ve been beaten-! We’ve, been beaten-! Time and time again!’”

His fist tightened and his mouth turned into an angry snarl. He suddenly was mad at himself. Enraged even. To think that an emotional weakness would so invade another facet of himself. The worst part about it was knowing that he had it. He had Celis to thank for that. He saw as his insecurity, right before his eyes, invaded his very being. And he did nothing to stop it. He really was just that, weak.

He sat up, wide eyed, in anger, staring at the wall.

“This needs to stop-!”

He said to himself.

“Before…before…”

Before he did something irreversible without meaning it. But as he said that, he saw Celis’s face in his head. How she was smiling as she walked away from him.

He sat in silence for a minute. The wind howling across the window.

It already had. Celis had left him. That was the part Alisson was failing to see. She’d saw his attitude, his disgraceful belligerence and aggressiveness, and, she left. Just like that.

Alisson looked to his side.

For a second he was confused why he did so, but he realized a second later that the reason being was because he was seeking solace from Celis. She wasn’t there. He was alone.

He sat in another minute of silence.

His eyes tightened and silvered.

“I should’ve said sorry…I should’ve…I…”

His breathing increased rapidly, and his grip on the bed below tightened.

“I’m, I’m sorry…I’m so sorry!”

The silver in his eyes finally flowed down across his face.

He said those words like doing so would fix everything, but it wouldn’t. He was left alone once more. No one was by his side. No one was there.

…It had taken Alisson far too long to realize it.

This was normal. This was what life was like before he’d met Celis. And now again he was cast into the darkness, with no one.

He’d taken her for granted. He thought he’d been like this, all alone, up until now, the same as ever.

He hadn’t. The person he was waiting for…had already came…and he’d just let her go.

…

…

…

Alisson’s mind was empty after that conclusion for a long while. All this time, he had someone next to him. Someone. He hadn’t acted on that someone. In fact, just today, he’d acted backwards on that someone. How could he hope to reach out, and to catch them without doing anything? Without showing any of his appreciation for their very existence?

He had done nothing. She was so patient with him over the months Alisson realized…Maybe she didn’t realize it, but Alisson did: The world had given him his chance, and Alisson hadn’t taken it. So here he was, alone again.

With all that in his head, he couldn’t stop himself from crying. At first he sat upright, his arms limp by his sides; Erratically and silently crying to himself. Though he realized that once again, he was acting on impulse, the impulse that Celis would be near. But no one was there. No one could hear him, and no one could see him.

Such a trivial thing it was. How his mind had went down a spiral set off by a single spark; from a realization to a total collapse. It was a horrid feeling, to be aware of this, watching it happen as if detached from himself. He was just that weak, and simple, to be destroyed by such a small thing.

Two hundred and fifty-nine years. No one had known him. Only a single person did. For that, Alisson’s sole want in that moment was to simply have that person again. Even though he logically knew that Celis was just in another room, in the same building even, the real distance between them was clearly defined by her act. He knew full well how small and insignificant that act was, but to Alisson, it felt like the end of world. Celis with this newfound distance would continue to increase that distance and over time place barriers between the two of them. Alisson could see it now. By the time they returned to Sidonia, if they returned to Sidonia, the two of them would have but dark and blank expressions; Alisson’s of guilt and loneliness, and Celis’s of disgust and vice.

This was all of course a radical spiral that only existed within Alisson’s head, formed within seconds, but in the moment, it was reality for Alisson.

For the first time in a long time, Alisson wept aloud. He fell to one side onto the bed, crying.

“I’m sorry…I should’ve, I should’ve…no one, no one, no one no one no one!”

…All the while muttering incoherently to himself in between his cries. Inwardly, Alisson wished someone would hear him. Of course, if Celis walked right through the door and into the room, he’d shut himself up right away, wipe away his tears and pretend like nothing was happening. It was so stupid. He was asking for help, even though that he knew that if help did ever come, he’d refuse it. Just like how he’d been waiting for someone, only to have refused that someone.

He knew all of this very well, and it only made his cries worse. He had his chance, no one was at fault but himself for his failings. It wasn’t some otherworldly misfortune.

The guilt welled in his stomach. In all his steeled will he thought he possessed, Alisson had still done something he hated. Hitting Celis like that, acting so belligerent to her, what was the point in taking such care and discipline to never slip up, to always do the correct thing, to be perfect, if you did eventually slip-up? All of the effort was wasted.

Eventually, after an ungodly amount of time, he’d quieted down. Without realizing it, he’d slipped under the bedframe, and had been tightly hugging a pillow on the floor. He sat like that for a while with dried tears on his face, breathing rapidly and erratically. He was vulnerable like that. Weak. The great, steel hearted Alisson Vi Nuam was nowhere to be seen. The sight was only that of a scared little boy, who looked miserably hopeless.

…I blew it…I messed it all up…I was so caught up in not offending her as if she were another fratello that I didn’t show my gratitude to the fact she was there…she doesn’t how much I…I…

The silence under the bed brought with it some coherent thought back to Alisson.

All hope is not lost…I, I still have a chance…I don’t know exactly what she was thinking…I still have a chance…I still have a chance…

He repeated to himself, and the thought soothed him. It was the one thought that in all those hours of weeping that was positive. He clung to it in lieu of his reasonable thought. Slowly, he inched out from under the bed. He stood, and took a deep breath.

“How pathetic I am.”

A snowball of logical thought rolled in Alisson’s head. The critic of his mind had come back. Knowing this, Alisson mentally prepared himself for a slue insults and reprimands, from himself, at himself. It was reassuring, really it was, to be put in his place after such a disgraceful and mindless day. He was expecting to pick himself apart, to be dissected and broken down, so that perhaps he may harden and steel himself when he reformed. That was how Alisson usually handled his once in a blue moon mental episodes, but this time, the insults never came. The reprimands and hindsight, the criticism and forethought, none of it came to his aid.

He wiped his face. He knew why. There was nothing to criticize. Nothing to illuminate. He’d already beaten himself up, not in the best way, but he’d hit all his bases.

He hadn’t felt any dread over the past few months since knowing Celis. Dread of death and of safety of course, but not the dread of loneliness. Celis was to thank for that. Alisson was glad that he realized this. In some weird way, his bout of mental depravity had been productive in one way.

“I wonder how she feels about me…She must hate me by now but before…”

He really didn’t know. Alisson didn’t know Celis. And for that he was crestfallen in himself. In having not realized sooner that she was the person he’d been waiting for, he hadn’t tried to really get to know her. The only thing he knew about her, was that she was like him in some way. Ever since the first day of her apprenticeship, there was something that tied them together. He couldn’t put his mind to it, it was just something that made her agreeable.

All those mortifying things Celis did with him. The two that struck out to him immediately, were when she cradled him on the Ipithid Plain; And when they were bathing with Tsuhara. Such small and trivial things they were. To Alisson however, he held them close to his heart. The fact that such events had even transpired between him and Celis, was all the more reason that she was the one.

The way she’d pinned him against a tree after they’d left Lavjoure’s mansion, shaking him down for his own sake, that had only happened a couple weeks ago. She did that, for him…

Alisson suddenly cracked a smile. He looked out the window, the moonlight splashing over his face.

“…I’m weak…stupid…and depraved of love...It’s no wonder you wouldn’t like me, Celis. Sidonia knows how many don’t. I’ve driven a barrier between us…”

Alisson rose his hands, and interlocked them in front of his chest, as if in prayer.

“…I’ll break it!”

Alisson resolved.

“I will. I’ll make it up to you, Celis. I'll try my best to be strong so that I can be by your side.”

He closed his eyes, smiling to himself.

“Suddenly it feels like the world isn’t all that meaningless…having someone to chase after…”

…

My stomach grumbles.

“Jeez doesn’t Alavier let you eat?”

“We eat together usually, but it’s been a hectic day…”

“Well you can have some of my leftovers from when I was out with Amela.”

Berein winked at me.

“Ah, t-thanks.”

I smile to her.

“The quickest way to a girl’s heart is through her stomach right?”

Berein said, lifting up a bag she was holding with the presumed leftovers.

“Haha yeah…”

I say. I then look away, and frowning, say to myself,

The heck does that even mean?

I really don’t understand Berein’s rhetoric. Just what is it she’s trying to get at anyway? Oh well. She’s just some adventurer. I won’t be seeing her after the job here is done so I just have put up with it.

We were walking through the halls of the Guild dorm when Berein stopped, and turned toward a door.

“This is my room…give me a second…”

She fumbled with her keys.

All this is happening because of me. I have power! Muhahaha…It’s really weird. If I hadn’t spoken up and stepped forward, then I’d probably be in my room with Alisson right about now, but I’m not. It’s weird how much the world isn’t on rails when I’m not around Alisson. Without someone making all the decisions for me, it’s a little scary.

I’m debating myself whether or not this was a good decision. My confident act in front of Alisson was just that, an act. If Alisson really comes back, furious, and drags me by the scruff of my neck, there’s really nothing I can do about it at that point. I mean, I kinda did just subvert his command, after having literally been scolded about doing that. Only this time it’s for much more mundane reasons. Learning some magic. Thrilling.

Well…the real reason is…I’m just kind of, scared of him right now…I don’t how to describe it, just some animalistic feeling inside of me says that, it’s better that I give him some room for now.

If Alisson is who I think he is…

He won’t try to stop me.

My stomach is tight for that reason. I want to see what he’ll do. In almost all scenarios in my head, Alisson will come to me, and confront me for just going off on my own whim without telling him. I just wonder what he’ll say, and how he’ll act. The most likely conclusion is that he’ll just be shrouded in steeled professionalism, like usual, and I won’t be able to discern him at all. And for that, I frown as I walk through into Berein’s room, nervously awaiting Alisson to suddenly appear and drag me away.

…

“Fa, Ro?”

“This one is better read as: Far, Oro.”

Berein says, looking over my shoulder. Her breath was tingling my cheeks, and it was making me very uncomfortable with how close she was. With the cult’s grimoire open before me on Berein’s desk, the both of us had been studying for the past hour. Well, I say both of us, Berein’s a lot more knowledgably in magic than me…she’s basically been teaching me everything. She knows stuff even my teachers back in Sidonia don’t, it’s crazy.

She was a little confused by the cult’s grimoire, as it was written by cultists and has some weird formatting and language choices. I decided to just be honest with her and tell Berein that I got it in cult lands. Why exactly do they need grimoires anyway…?

…I mean, like, they’re all bugs.

“Ah…sorry, I’ve like, never done neutral spells before…”

“None? Not even a lighting spell?”

“The only lighting spell I have is a bootleg water-based I made for a school pro-”

I stop myself short.

Oh crap. Oh crap. Humans don’t go to school.

“A school project made you make a spell? Just what school did your family send you to?”

Berein tilted her head. Oh thank Sidonia. I forgot, she thinks I’m a noble, like her, so she understands education. I mentally sigh. It’s really hard keeping track of masks…

“Ah, sorry I misspoke…My tutor made me make my own spell…I never went to any school for magic.”

I lied. I don’t know anything about magic schools for nobility. I’m not going to try to pretend like I do.

“Well can I see it?”

Berein asks, smiling. I shakily nod, and open my hand out in front of me. After chanting a short incantation, my very own tiny blue candlelight spell appears. It’s so weak…I can’t even call it a light, and it’s really inefficient too…I think I used this spell like, once? Yeah, right before I went into that black forest with Alisson, I cast it because I was bored. And then he told me and ordered me to cancel it or whatever. I used to use this to read books under the covers after I’d made it. But that’s a secret.

It was way too weak and too much a mana-whore to use back in that cavern, and to be honest I forgot about it. It’s not exactly a useful spell.

“…You said you don’t know any lighting spells?”

I shook my head.

“Hah…jeez…You know, like almost all of those runes in your spell are the same ones that are in the basic light spell…”

“W-wait what!?”

Berein sighs with a smile. She took the pencil out of my hand and then started to jot down half a page of small runes on a blank page of cult grimoire.

“There, there’s the light spell, it’s a lot more efficient, but about the same length.” Berein said, twirling the pencil in her fingers.

I stared at the runes. I then looked up to Berein with an annoyed expression.

“You’re telling me I slaved away for weeks researching how to make a lighting spell, found the right runes, and came this close to recreating the mainline spell I was emulating?”

Berein looked at me smugly in response.

“Yuuup.”

I sigh, defeated.

“Well, look at it this way, you must be some sort of prodigy if you came that close without actually knowing or having seen the spell, right?”

“I guess…” I frowned, looking back to the grimoire.

There is a reason I was the top graduate.

“You must have had some great teachers, you’re so young but you know so much…”

I’m like, double your age, and you’re the one schooling me. If she knew that, she wouldn’t be praising me. Granted we Nekomata don’t go into schooling as early as humans do, the original age for Nekomata to finally stop being children was one hundred after all. Now its been changed due to manpower shortages though. I was ten, when I was inducted into education, mostly because I had no family to take care of me. That meant that all the Nekomata around me were a lot more developed, physically and mentally. I had to mature pretty fast to keep pace, though it’s not like in twenty five years of training I was always sitting in a classroom, a lot of it was apprenticeships in different aspects of life. Sidonians love throwing around the twenty-fives years of preparation as a mark of superiority but it’s really not all that intensive compared to human training. It was really more training of discipline and loyalty to Sidonia. There’s a reason all Nekomata are so steadfast and loyal. It’s not like we’re all somehow mystically inclined to slave away to Sidonia.

“What kind of schooling did you get Berein?”

I asked, the thought of education in my head.

“Oh, I was enrolled in the Andestine-”

My eyes sharpened and teeth tightened, and my hands clenched, ready to kill. I quickly realized my own killing intent, and quickly subdued it. Hearing that word after what they did to Alisson, it made me ready to sprint to his aid all of a sudden.

“-School of Crafts for a few years. I wasn’t able to graduate because my family collapsed before then.”

“Collapsed?” I tilted my head at her.

“We were attacked by a rival house of nobility. I managed to escape with my younger sister though, we bounced around for a bit but eventually we ended up here in Pūshkinskaya.”

I looked to the bunk beds in the room.

“Ah yeah…She used to sleep on the top one…”

The way Berein was talking, she was clearly uncomfortable.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to talk about it.”

I said, not wanting to hear another adventurer’s sob story.

“Oh…t-thanks…”

She seemed surprised that I picked up on that.

“How’d you…?”

“Being around Alavier has taught me how to read emotions well.”

I say, picking up the pencil and getting back to copying junks of neutral runes down.

“So why then as a noble are you out in a town like this as an adventurer?”

I asked absentmindedly.

“Hm…Right back at you…”

She was lenient enough to not ask to explain myself, so I was expecting her to leave it at that, but she continued.

“I, just need money is all…”

For some reason, she really feels the need to answer to people. I feel like if I say anything she’ll continue on talking about something she’s uncomfortable with; So I just don’t reply.

“Um…No offense, but you’re not usually that talkative…As you were back there…”

I sigh.

“He…I think he needs some time alone right now is all.”

Berein tilted her head at me.

“What happened?”

I squirmed uncomfortably. Inwardly though, I really wanted to explain myself. Some sort of need within me to come clean to Alisson.

“He was acting, not like himself…”

Berein frowned.

“And how would that be?”

She asked with askance. Evidently Crimson don’t seem to like Alisson as much as I, partly because of his recent attitude and because he’s had to dig in his heels and say no to their advances on our behalves.

“He’s always so kind and understanding…gentle, shy…he’s very protective over me and his, friends,” I almost said comrades, that’d be bad – “I, I think that’s what I like about him…he’s the only person that’s really cared for me…”

Even though that might all just be his kindness and to the fact I’m his apprentice, leading him to care for me while he could have zero affection for me.

“But recently…he’s had a really short temper…he’s gets angry a lot easier, and he doesn’t seem kind or soft much anymore…”

I know Alisson has a hard shell. I just don’t know what’s under it. For all I know, that’s all that Alisson is, a shell.

“So I’ve been cautious about him…I, I don’t know if it’s the right way to act after all he’s done for me…”

Berein was silent for a long while.

“…You two have been through a lot, right?”

I nodded my head.

“Stick with him, I’m sure everything will be fine with time. It sounds like you could go really far with someone like that.”

For whatever reason, her voice trembled slightly.

“…I mean, if you draw about somone while talking about them, you have to like them a lot…”

“W-w-what!?”

I look down to the paper before me, flustered. I quickly see what Berein was referring to. Great…just great…

I’d started drawing a doodle of Alisson without even thinking about it. Specifically it looked like he was sleeping, with his parted mouth and gently closed eyes, looking more like a princess than a prince.

I quickly covered the page, blushing.

“You’re a really good artist, you don’t have to hide that stuff.”

“But it’s really embarrassing…”

Berein wrapped her hands around my shoulders, grabbing onto my wrists.

“But it’s also really pretty…”

She said, her face right next to my own, our breaths overlapping. She parted my wrists, exposing the doodle much to my blushing embarrassment.

We sat like that for a moment, before I realized what exactly was directly against my back.

“Ah- P-please…”

I stammered weakly, pushing away Berein.

“Ah, sorry I couldn’t help myself…”

She said, averting her eyes with a red face, backing away a little.

What’s that supposed to mean!?

I suddenly feared for my safety.

“But…do you really think hiding away from him is the answer?”

Berein says, leaning in closer, tilting her head.

“…It was just a, a move…was all.”

I say, slowly nodding to myself. I’m not lying, it was a tactical move on my part to try and shake some normalcy into Alisson and put a check to the way he’s been acting.

“All’s fair in love and war I spouse’. You just need to kiss and make up now.”

Berein says, lightly hitting the back of my head. I look to her, annoyed from her physical contact.

“That’s easy for you to say…”

I looked out the window, wondering what Alisson was doing.

He’s probably just pissed off at me.

I pouted at that thought and got back studying. Even if Berein advises against it, I can totally nail these two spells. Alisson wanted me to learn them, after all. The sounds of Pūshkinskaya’s garrison fighting off beasts at the wall permeated throughout the city as I scribbled with Berein overlooking my shoulder.

***