Light filters in through the window, and onto my eyelids. I sit up, and rub the sleep from my eyes with a yawn. A faint huffing sound catches my attention. I look over and see Thelia is not in her chair, but instead doing situps on the floor naked. I shield my eyes.

“I didn’t see anything nope not at all.” I face the other way. And get out of bed.

“What's wrong don’t tell me you’ve never seen a woman naked before?” Thelia says. I can hear the floorboards creaking as she gets up. “You have my blood oath if you ev-"

“I will cut you off right there, that is not at all the problem. I have seen plenty of naked women.”

“Oh! Have you now?” She interjects her voice full of mirth.

“I-I am going to get changed, and then go to Lily, and request a cot, and a get a short wooden divider so we can change, or do your nude exercises without bothering the other one.” I start to undress, and put on other clothes. When the door swings open.

“Jonathan here is your phone artifact, I forgot to give it back the other-" Anise stops. She looks at me, then towards Thelia, then back at me. “Oh okay.”

She says. She places the phone on the table next to the door, then closes the door. I hop towards the door while pulling my pants on. I swing open the door, and hop into the hallway. Finally straightening my pants out. Anise is is at the bottom of the stairs. I hurry down them, and grab her arm.

“It isn’t what it looks like.” I tell her.

“I didn’t say anything.” She replies.

“Yeah, but you were thinking it.” I say.

“Really it’s none of my business.” She cuts in.

I let out a sigh. “I did not have sexual relations with that woman. She made a blood pledge, oath thing to me. And has been hovering around me ever since. I haven’t gone to the bathroom since yesterday afternoon, because she would probably follow me in there.”

Now that I think about it my sessions with Anise would either need to be explained, or I would need to get really good at stealth.

“Now I’ll treat you to a cup of coffee, I mean tinkerbrew.” I smile, and pat her shoulder.

“You mean that bitter black tea?”

I put my hand to my chin in thought.

“Yeah, I guess it is a type of tea.” I wave my hand. “Regardless it will wake you up.”

I pull up to a table, a barmaid is already walking over coffee in hand for me.

“Can you bring a pitcher filled with tinkerbrew out, a second pitcher with milk, and sugar or honey. Also two empty mugs.”

I tell her. The barmaid gives me an odd look, but nods and walks back into the kitchen. Thelia sits down beside me.

“You shouldn’t have gone so far away.” She says, and strains out her shirt, her leather gear is sitting beside her on the floor.

“Well why were you exercising in the buff?” I retort. She gives me an odd look. “Your birthday suit. In the Raw. Bare ass naked. Sheesh do you people know what context clues are?”

I sigh in exasperation.

“Well to answer you,” Thelia replies. “Prestidigitation doesn’t remove sweat well. I didn’t want to smell to badly, or use a bunch of the energy in the cleaning wand.”

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“I will accept that answer.” I raise my cup to my lips. Coffee always calmed me down, the caffeine didn’t help, but the action was calming.

Shortly afterward a barmaid brought out the hot coffee, and milk with a small dish of sugar cubes.

I poured milk and coffee into the cups at around a four to one parts ratio, respectively. And dropped two sugar cubes in one, and none in the other. I gave each a quick stir, and that was that.

I handed Anise the mug with two sugar cubes, and Thelia the cup with no sugar. Anise took a tentative sip. I could tell the minute that the warm radiated in her chest. Her face relaxed, and her cheeks turned rosey. She took another sip, and melted into her chair.

Thelia was different. She took a casual sip, and now the coffee wasn’t so bitter. She finished the cup in two gulps, and poured another cup for herself.

I slam my hand over her cup. “Stop, relax yourself. Caffeine, which is a big part of coffee, or tinkerbrew, is addictive. It’s also classified as a drug, so pace yourself. You don’t want to go through withdrawal when you lose access to it.” I lift my hand away from her mug.

I didn’t think now was the best time to tell her tea also has caffeine in it. She didn’t immediately go back to chugging her drink. Thelia swirls her mug in her hands.

“You hadn’t had it for a while, why were you not going through withdrawal?” Thelia asks me.

“I’ve been drinking this stuff since I was, what, 12? 13? I’m all, but immune to it. I don’t even get the burst of energy that you should start feeling soon, just an elevated heart rate. Like many people from my home.” I chuckle a little, “It’s funny actually. Did you know, well obviously you don’t, but there are franchises, uhhh like a single store that has a bunch of different stores that it all owns and they all sell the same stuff, that are almost entirely centered around selling this stuff.” I explain to them.

“That's the biggest challenge,” I grimace. “We, errr my home, has a franchise for everything. Toys, books, furniture, food, clothing, weapons, household appliances, adult entertainment,” I emphasize that last part by performing the universal hand gesture for sex, “and everything in between. And more than 90 percent of it is made in factories, by giant machines. Imagine a building 200-feet tall, more than a mile wide, and double that long, filled with something similar to golems. These golems are just arms and they perform only one task, but 100s upon 100s of these things exist, in 100s upon 100s of these plants. And all they do 14 hours a day is produce whatever anybody wants.” I lift up the mug in front of me it’s rough from years of use, but the craftsmanship is solid.

“It took someone probably 12 years to learn how to make a mug this perfect. A factory could make a billion of these mugs in a week and every single one of them would be exactly the same, with more precise cuts, and smoother sides. And you could buy 50 of them for maybe a silver, but probably less.”

I pause and look up at Thelia, and Anise. They both stare at me a worried look in their eyes.

“How many is one billion?” Thelia asks.

I retrieve some paper from my bag. I scribble down the number one on the paper. “This is one,” I add a zero to the end. “This is 10, then one hundred.” I write down three more zeroes. “100 thousand,” three zeroes after that. “100 million,” I put the final zero on. “One billion. that is who we are fighting. A country with the ability to make a billion cups in a week, within a single factory, and that factory is identical to a thousand other factories doing the same thing. Before I left we hit the 10 billion mark. 10 BILLION people live on my home plane.”

Thelia audibly gulps.

I laugh aloud. “I would put it out of your mind for now. My home has no magic, and the best of us grow up hearing legends about beautiful elven queens, and the mighty orcs. A huge section of our culture is devoted to it. I’m sure that many people would be more than happy to jump at the chance to throw fire,” a cringey smile spreads across my face. “I’m also positive brothels will be packed with eager men ready to get their rocks off to a muscly orc, dainty elf, perhaps even a goblin gang. Like I said adult entertainment.”

Anise chokes on her drink. “Heh, heh. You are joking right, surely no one would enjoy being assaulted.”

I cringe again, “They wouldn’t enjoy it they would love it.” I shrug, “some people are into that kinda stuff.”

Anise looks like she is going to be sick.

“So what are you into then?” Thelia elbows me, quick to pick up on any physical gesture.

“Settling down, and having a family with a woman I love.” I reply.

Thelias face strains like she can’t tell if I’m serious, or not. Anise snorts with laughter.

“Hey why don’t we all take a trip to the cave in a few days. I have some… magical research to do.” I tell Thelia, and Anise.

“We have a Tank, a healer, and DPS. We can pack light, and get there in a few days, I can take my readings and then we can come back. Easy peasy lemon squeezy.”

A quick trip there and back spend two days writing information down at the portal, and downloading encyclopedias. What could go wrong?