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- Takarada Kito - 7:00 pm - Over Turkish Republic -
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“I’ll make sure… you felt my pain…” She smiles, twistedly.
God… why have you done me this way.
“Emmm Yuki… is that your ex?” Ivory asked sarcastically. I breathe in, and… out. And then breathe in once more… finally…
“Look inside my mind and you'll understand! God Dangit!” I roar. By god… am I that much of a magnet for troubles?
“Or a psychopath.” Ivory added. I'm not asking! Well… I'm asking rhetorically.
Phoenix then sprinted toward us, I don’t have a sword now so I relied on dodging.
Her scythe was a centimeter away from cutting off my neck. WAY TOO CLOSE.
“Phoenix… why are you even doing this…”
“You abandon me!” She screams. “You forsaken me!” She roars. “I’ll make you suffer the same fate!” Heat radiates out of her. Oh god the heat… it is so goddamn hot the airplane felt like an oven. God…
She then began her barrage of assault, swinging the scythe wildly and without order… yeah…
“My phoenix is as good as gone… huh…” I said, with a tone of sadness… my best friend… my first real friend… my… first love perhaps…
When she heard that, she froze.
“What do you mean? I’m here. I’m Phoenix! Your first l-”
“Don’t give me that crap!” I said… anger well up in me… where did this anger come from? It was like… I’m no longer me… strange.
“You are not her! Not even close!!” I spoke as if I know for sure… but I’m certain I don’t know… What a weird feeling. It's almost as if… I’m no longer… me…
There is this… hot?... sensation… it is welling inside me… slowly…
And then, there is coldness on my fingers… then a sharp pain. And yet… it felt… numb. It should be painful. I know it should be painful. And yet… it couldn’t recognize the pain… I couldn’t recognize the pain.
I myself felt heavy… but not my body… I felt weak… limp… and exhausted.
‘Sleep well, Alter. I’ll take care of this.’ some voice rings in my ear.
Nostalgic… this all felt… too familiar…
I can’t… focus…
I…
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- Takarada Naoko - 6 A.M. - Thai Royal Academy Hospital -
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The light… beyond the tunnel…
Don’t go there, they said… it leads to the afterlife… they said.
Yet, when I reach it… I felt… only remorses.
I woke up in a blank white room. A mechanical machinery sounds all around me.
Peep… peep… the cardiac monitor peeped away. So… I’m in hospital… huh…
Peep… peep… everything else is silent…
Peep… peep… the tears started to form… I…
“What… have I done…” I ask… in an empty room… I ask no one.
The memory flooded my brain… I hurt my teammates… my friends… I… I…
“It’s not a good thing to keep blaming yourself, your know.” A voice echoing in the room. I look over, searching for its origin. Then, I found the source.
A white, snowy hairs… a black secretary suit… a cold blue eye… a pair of fox ears… and nine fluffy tails… The White Ninetails…
“Kumiho…” I whimpered out. I…
“Don’t be so sad. Your bloodlust is a symptom of your inexperience. You two really are brother and sister… Shisaka is really proud of that..” She smiles softly. I trembled…
Shisaka… was my mother's last name before she changed to Takarada… Shisaka Haruna... no one should know her former name though... not in Siam at least.
“You don’t have to be that scared of me. I’m here to help you, as much as I can anyway.” She said that… However, I simply cannot trust her on that… especially since I’m alone with her… and I've just recovered from… whatever happened to me.
“Come on, calm down. I’m not gonna eat my own kind. But… you shouldn’t as well.” She glared at me. I’m terrified. What… does she mean by… eating my own kind… ?
“It just means I’m not gonna eat fellow foxes. You, you are a fox, even if you try to deny it.” She said it clearly… well…
I remember seeing myself… that… fox-like aura… the claws… the ears… the tails… the reddish hue that superseded everything… god… may he be merciful… to me and to everyone I sent to him…
“Your face tells me you do remember, and that you regret it. That is to be expected. But you have to cast aside that weakness. You won’t reach your brother's place if you keep regretting every wrongdoing you have done.” She said.
The genuine version of this novel can be found on another site. Support the author by reading it there.
“But… even if you said that.” I whimpered. I… I don’t know what to do.
She saw my pathetic self, and sighed loudly. “Naoko, do you remember the first time your brother met Tamamo, in that meeting room?” She looks out the window. “I was watching the video tape from that encounter. And, to be honest with you. I’m floored by how mature and immature your brother is.” She looks back at me. “What did he say when he tried to calm down Narin?”
I tried to remember, then it hit me…
“Are you suggesting that you can change the past?... Then let it go…”
“He just let it go, isn’t it? Rather than trapped himself, thinking of every outcome that could have happened, he let go of the past and continued moving forward. And I really love that naivete and composure of him.” She smiles softly. “To move forward without acknowledging your past can only bring trouble. And… Well, your brother is in trouble because of that so often it’s hilarious.” She forces a laugh… then she looks right at me.
“Well, now the question is, can you move forward while acknowledging your past? Can you truly accept that you are a vicious, young fox that wants to bring ruin to everything? Only by true understanding of that fact can you free yourself from the bind of fate that tightens around your neck.” She opened the door, and said one last thing “Against your fate… can you stand strong or will you bend to its will. I really want to see how you will overcome this obstacle to your ‘Normal’ way of life.” She closed the door…
“What an enigmatic person…” I mumbled… and I can certainly say… “Not being helpful at all… 1 star.” I then laugh to myself…
Yeah… I should let things go… but that doesn’t mean I have to follow my brother’s way… right?
Laid myself back to the bed, I have an idea of what I should do… but then again… “I want to define myself… a bit more…” I mumbled. I hated that other people love to define who I am… and that I have to conform to it. Sure, I’m a girl, that doesn’t mean I have to be weak. Sure I’m an archer, that doesn’t mean I don’t know how to use a gun…
“I’ll continue being myself… the way that I am…” I fall back to sleep… good gracious…
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- Christin R. Rosak - 6:30 A.M. - Thai Royal Academy Hospital, outside of Neko’s recovery room -
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“So, she woke up and then went back to sleep?” I asked. The white haired fox nodded. It's just that huh.
Narin then tucked on my shirt. She seems to be fearful of this fox in particular. Not that I don’t understand her though. She, intentionally or not, was exposed to be cannibalistic by our teacher… who just happened to be black haired fox… Seriously though. White one is a cannibal… and Black one is the woman whose beauty has ruined an empire… What kind of femme fatale situation is this!?
I place my hand on Narin’s head, slowly rubbing it. Whenever I do this, she calms down a bit. And she did.
Now, let’s think about this through…
“You said she is fox… right?”
“Yeah, celestial fox to be precise.”
“What’s the difference?”
“Nominally. Although, the person themselves tend to do what the name suggests anyway.”
“What do you mean?” I glared at her.
“You know, people tend to have their name lead them along the river that’s called fate. For her, being celestial probably led her to be cynical to everything… and become cold-hard calculating… just like Tamamo.” She mumbles the last part
“You said Tamamo is calculating?” Narin is disgusted by the suggestion that Tamamo is smart in any way. And to a certain degree, I agree with her.
“You don’t know the full picture.” She said, “Tamamo has always tried to prioritize the organization, then the mass… then the individual. Do you know? The Founding Rules regarding corruption and organization in-fighting were created by her, specifically so that corruption has no place in your organization. She was so paranoid by the fact that outside politics will inevitably influence the inner circle, that’s the reason why the Class system even existed in the first place.”
“I don’t think I followed your logic.” I said. She looks at me, groan a bit then said.
“Look, Tamamo tries to rid corruption for a long time without turning the whole system into dictatorship, or an anarchist organization. Power structure has to exist, but those in power must never be allowed to step over the line. If they do…”
“They are eliminated ASAP…” Narin spoke up, surprised. White fox just grinning.
“Now you should have a better understanding of your senior’s decision. Yes, there might be a better way. But to cut a rotten branch is to be decisive. If you just hesitate on whether or not you should do it, or in what way it should be done, those rot will spread. And in an international humanitarian, anti-terrorist organization like yours, it can be detrimental to have rogue elements inside and not dealing with it immediately.” She explained. Well… I have a tiny glimpse of what she tries to say… all while Narin seems like she’s having an existential crisis of her life. Well… she did have that… argument?... with Tamamo anyway.
“Now then, I believe I should go. You can remain here. Things should calm down now, but you are still worried about your friend, right?” She said then walked off… without anything else to say…
It’s just me and Narin, sitting in front of the room of our friend… who turned on us at that time…
“Chris… what would Yuki-san do?” She asked, worryingly.
“I… I don’t know… Narin…” I stop patting her head… Looking on toward the door to her room…
“I never want to meet that red fox ever again…” She said, shiveringly.
The figure of Neko, soaked in blood, dyed everything red… it was a terrifying sight.
“It… almost like a nightmare…” I said. Look on worryingly, we can only think of what to come next. That is…
“Yo, want some soda?” That hammer guy walked up to us, with a lot of cold drink… and our black fox teacher behind him.
Ummm… our teacher looks a bit pale, a bit sweaty and a bit out of breathe. “I… never once thought…” She mumbled… I look on, horrified, then look at him.
“Just some exercise. Mostly with words.” He said.
Exercise… with words?...
“Yeah, not buying it.”
“Up to you. Want some?” He pushed his soda to us who were still confused. And of course, we grab it.
“Thinking of contingency is fine. But don’t be so grim. The world is a harsh place. So don’t make it harsher than it already is.” He said before drinking his drink.
“You said that. But Neko…” I tries to convey something… but I don’t really know what I want to convey.
“She is a fox and she tried to kill you once. Is that enough to break your friendship?”
“No…”
“Then, what's the matter?”
“She might do it again…”
“Then just force her back.”
“It might be forever…”
“Then just do that forever.”
“What about…”
“Or do you want to see her suffered again?”
“No.”
“Then stop her when time come.”
“How?”
“Be stronger.” He pat my shoulder. “If she is stronger than you, then be stronger. Strong enough to stop her.”
“Talk like it easy.”
“Or do you want someone else to do it? Someone who might use lethal force?”
“No…”
“Then do it. You don’t have much choice.”
His words melded into me. So… is that it? Be stronger and ready to fight her. That’s all I can do.
“Protect your beloved. Isn’t that why you stand your ground at that time?”
“!!!”
I… yeah… I want…
I pat Narin's head again, she looks at me curiously. Yeah… I definitely want to protect her.
“Find a smaller goal and tries to achieve it.”
“You’re what, a life coach or something?”
“No, but I do work as a consultant.”
“That’s… surprising.”
“What, a semi-buffy guy like me cannot be a professional consultant?”
“You are professional?”
“I got a diploma at least.”
“You need a f*cking degree!”
Narin laughs at our banter… yeah… this is definitely better. But…
Yuki, come back soon.
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