As Alistair jogged around campus the next morning, he couldn’t help but relive just how embarrassed he had felt simply appearing on the main floor of the Wraithen Archives and the way everyone gawked at him.

He grew so distracted in reliving the experience that he tripped over a stone step, and would have injured himself had it not been for Ghost.

“Pay attention,” Ghost told Alistair, the assassin now in control of his body. “Or do I need to do this for you?”

“I’ve got it.” Alistair pushed himself up and dusted off his hands. He squinted up at the sky, the morning sun halfway behind what looked like a raincloud. “Sorry.”

“What are you thinking about anyway?”

“I was thinking about what happened last night.”

“The little incident in the Underhall? Who cares? Screw anyone here that actually gives a shit. If you really want, we can start a rumor that it didn’t happen. We still have two rumors left.”

“Maybe that’s unnecessary,” Alistair said as he started off again. “I’ll just be more careful.”

“Or do that, good.”

After another lap, it was to the weight room for arm day, Alistair’s biceps pulsing and his shoulders twitching by the time Ghost was done. He was just walking to the dining hall to meet Juno, Zola, and Finnian, when he received a message from Professor Humboldt, which came coupled with one of the man’s longest yawns yet.

Professor Humboldt: Sorry about that. Where was I? Right. Today’s Qualifying Tournament will be of the Mage Solo variety. Those of you that like fighting with your fists, here is your chance. Hopefully by now you have done some training in the Resonant Rooms. If you are unwilling or unable to fight with your fists, you will be given a way to forfeit the match. Remember, some of the best battledeck mages in history couldn’t win a thumb wrestling match. I think that makes sense. What I’m saying is that fisticuffs, and whatnot, is a barbaric way to do what we are able to do, yet it can also be crucially important. Good luck. And for those of you that performed well in yesterday’s Primordial Solo fight, congratulations. Meet at the Ephemera Gardens in an hour.

“You ready to kick somebody’s ass?” Juno asked after Alistair sat down in front of him with a tray of food. The other boy’s eyes dropped onto a couple of sausage rolls Alistair had picked up, which had just come out of the oven. “Dang, they didn’t have those fuckers when I went through.”

“Have one of mine.”

“You sure?”

Alistair nodded and Juno took one of the sausage rolls.

Zola looked like she was about to say something, but didn’t. Instead, she buried her head to some degree as a few older students passed by their table. “Ugh. They were there last night in the Archives.”

“Really?” Juno asked as he looked over to the Skywards, who sat at a table near a large window.

“What were you all doing in the Underhall anyway?” Finnian asked after wiping his mouth with a napkin. “You never mentioned that.”

“Ah, that.” Juno stuck his tongue out at the students that continued to stare at them.

“Juno!”

“It’s fine, Zola. They won’t do shit, but they will tell Melissa, and it’ll annoy her. So two slimes, one stone?” He returned his focus to Finnian. “As to why we were in the library, We were there for Lorcan. He assigned us some bullshit task.”

“And you got lost?”

“Yup,” he told the Finnian. “And we found out just how horny of a bastard the Underhall is.”

“I’ll remember that if I ever get lost down there.” Finnian grinned at them. “Just go into a room and rub the walls, right?”

“It worked for us.”

“We aren’t going to get lost down there again,” Zola said. “I have a solution for that.”

Juno didn’t seem to care as he took a bite out of the sausage roll. He chewed as he spoke. “Either way, Zolski—” Some crumbs flew out of his mouth. “Sorry. Either way, we got out. So we’re good. And now, we got a hack. Even better.”

“I work there, remember? And chew with your mouth shut.”

“I am!” Juno swallowed. “If you need me to get a job there too just to take the focus off you, let me know. Not that I want a job at the Archives, but I could make room in my schedule. Speaking of which. We all got money. Let’s go to town tonight and get a nice meal at that one fancy place to celebrate something. I don’t know. We’ll figure it out. If any bards come, we’ll ignore their songs this time. Fuck Tarnis, the dungeon twat.”

Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.

Finnian laughed again. “You sure have a way with words.”

“I try.”

“But I’m busy tonight.”

“You got a hot date or something?” Juno asked Finnian as finish the sausage roll.

“I do, actually.” Finnian smiled at him and Juno nodded, impressed.

“Lucky.”

“You could get a date too if you learned some manners,” Zola told Juno, her eyes flitting back and forth from Juno’s face to students who kept looking over it at them. Zola dipped her chin a little, which allowed some of her striking silver hair to fall into her face.

“People are either going to like me for me, or they’re not. And I’ve got plenty of manners. Hello, milady,” Juno told a passing Mageling.

The girl took one look at Juno, made a disgusted face, and slowly turned away.

Juno laughed and continued chewing his food. “She was probably mean anyway. Point is, Zola, people will like me for me, or they can fuck off.”

Ghost: That’s the dumbest statement I’ve heard today. The point isn’t for people to like you for you. The point is for you to trick people into liking you so that you can later use them to your advantage. Behaving like a goblin at the dinner table will get you nowhere. Juno needs refinement. And I don’t think I’ll be the one to teach him.

Alistair: You wouldn’t teach him anyway. Why even suggest it?

Ghost: Smile and nod with Juno.

Alistair: Smile and nod with the Provost and with Felix Bancroft. Now Juno?

Ghost: The quiet assassin is later the first to speak. Remember that.

Alistair rolled his eyes.

“Everything alright?” Zola asked him.

“Yeah, just, um, reliving what happened last night. That was so embarrassing but, um, maybe Juno is right.”

“Hell yeah, I am!”

Zola raised an eyebrow at Alistair. “Right about what, exactly?”

“I don’t know how to articulate it, but about people. They’ll like us for us.”

Juno toasted Alistair even though his cup was empty. “That’s right. And tonight, the three of us celebrate the fact that we all can tolerate each other.”

Zola sent a message to both of them.

Zola: And after, more in the Underhall. You only have the book for a limited amount of time. And I’ll set up a way for us to get out.

Juno: Now that we know how to get out, we don’t need another way. We just bring the Underhall to—

Zola: We’re not doing that again.

****

The Fledgling coteries all moved into a portal at the Ephemera Gardens, where they were transported to an arena with stands made of wood.

The otherworldly setting was something Alistair was used to by this point, from the closeness clouds felt to the way everything seemed older than dust yet perfectly maintained, even down to blades of grass beneath his feet that all seemed to be cut at the exact same height. This particular space seemed more elevated than yesterday’s battleground, like the coteries had collectively moved up in the world.

Their three instructors, along with Professor Vale’s hazegeist, stood before them. Professor Yuber stepped up, smiled at the coteries, cleared his throat, and spoke: “The Mage Solo tournament will begin shortly. Your opponents will be chosen randomly, and you will turn in your wands on your way to your battle. Members from Seraph’s Rest will be standing by. They don’t need to be coddled. Yes, yes, they do,” he mumbled to himself. “Ah, here they are.”

A portal opened up and three Skywards in white overcoats stepped out. “Sorry, Professor,” the girl said in a deep voice.

“It’s quite alright.” Yuber focused back on the coteries, “Now, remember that you can always forfeit the match at the start or any time during your bout by taking a knee. I encourage you to actually try to fight, but I do understand that some of you might not be as confident in those abilities as others. Part of this is by design. Physically fighting takes as much instinct as it does instruction. What we are looking for here is instinct coupled with things you may have learned previously. Later this semester, we will start with actual combat training for those who would like to learn more. But enough from me. Let’s begin.”

Everyone had settled in the wooden stands, and the first to be called were a pair of students from Vale’s coterie. They gave each other a hell of a pummeling, their fight ending with one boy on top of the other sinking fists into his opponent’s face again.

Juno: I would have tapped out by that point, not gonna lie.

The next to be called was the girl with the shaved head who always hung out with Laertes and a boy from Professor Vale’s coterie.

“Remember,” Professor Humboldt said at the end of an epic yawn, “you may be forced to fight the opposite sex on the battlefield and shouldn’t shy away from doing so. This is par for the course.”

After words were exchanged, the two students went at it, the boy trying for kicks and grapples, while the girl kept catching him off guard with rapidfire kicks. She finally got hold of his face with her nails, where things got bloody.

“Oooooo…” Several of the students murmured in unison.

From there, it was a couple of stomps before the boy gave up the fight. Laertes and his friends cheered her on as she rejoined them. He made sure to look back and lock eyes with Alistair when doing so.

Ghost: I know we are planning to throw the match, but if you somehow get to fight Laertes?

Alistair: I’ll do it.

Ghost: Yes, you will. And make it hurt. In fact, you start the fight, then I’ll take over and do the real damage. They’ll heal him, but he’ll be crying until they do.

“Next up,” Professor Yuber said. “Alistair Blackstar and Lauren Carmel.”

Alistair glanced over to the girl from his coterie, the one whom he had once assumed was an orphan. She locked eyes with Alistair.

Lauren: Don’t go light on me.

Alistair: We don’t have to fight.

Lauren: I swear, if you go light on me or forfeit early, Alistair, I’ll be pissed. You wouldn’t like me when I’m pissed. Besides, this will be fun.

Lauren grinned at Alistair and bared her teeth at him slightly in the process.

“Shit, bro,” Juno said, as Alistair got to his feet, “she’s going to eat you alive.”