Chapter 570: Mother & Daughter

  Loh sat anxiously in the parlor room, trying her best to stay calm. It was hard enough being in a room full of people who shared her surname, but it was Stryg and Tauri sitting across from her that rattled her insides. They were right there. Two of the three people she held closest in her heart were sitting only a few paces away. She wanted to rush over and hug them tightly. She wanted to tell them she was so relieved to see them alive and safe.

  It had been only a couple of days since she had seen Stryg at the council meeting and she hadn’t been able to talk to him about anything. Not about her grandfather, not about their hasty departure at Undergrowth, or about the emptiness that lay between them.

  Then there was Tauri, her best friend. A woman whose fiancé she had let die, a fiancé who also happened to be Loh’s own brother. The last conversation they had really had involved Tauri wanting to kill her.

  And now those two people were sitting next to each other, hands clasped. There was a strange discomfort seeing Tauri and Stryg together, but it was different than it had been with Aizel. Loh examined the feeling, understood the envy for what it was, and let it go. If Tauri and Stryg were happy, then that was all that mattered.

  Nonetheless, though Loh didn’t want to admit it, she was dying to know more about how the relationship had transpired. The rumors of the scandal at the Katag’s dinner party were all any of the nobles were talking about. The first Ebon Aspirant in centuries, somehow turned out to be the heir of House Veres, and was now engaged to a daughter of House Katag, only to reveal in front of the nobility that he was sleeping with the elder daughter?

  Loh smiled wryly to herself. Stryg’s notorious surprises seemed to never end.

  Then again, Stryg had always surprised her, ever since the first day she had met him. She wouldn’t be surprised if he still had a few more secrets up his sleeve.

  As Loh glanced around the room she noticed her mother staring at her. Dolores quickly looked away as soon as their eyes made contact. It felt like opening the stitches of another festering wound. Guilt filled Loh’s heart. This woman was a failure of a mother, but it was Loh who had taken her son away and left her a broken husk. She didn’t deserve the way Dolores watched her, eyes full of worry.

  Another pair of eyes came to mind, one Loh dreaded to see, yet yeared to every day. The woman she had wanted to spend the rest of her life with. Loh was glad Louise was out at the bakery today. Lily had informed her that the young woman was baking bread for the refugees of the city who had lost their homes in the siege. Louise was a genuinely good person, one of the few in this messed up world.

  After everything that had happened, Loh didn’t know how to face her. Louise represented her dreams of a better future away from all of this, but Loh knew she didn’t deserve it.

  She looked at Stryg and Tauri once more. Loh didn’t deserve such happiness. She deserved to be here, in the foreground of her cursed House, leading them through the wake of Elzri’s death. Whatever dangers the future held, she would bear them alone for the Noirs, for the sake of her grandfather’s memory. Loh swore to herself she would be the leader he had always wanted, even if it meant giving up the life she had always wanted.

  Soon after, Lily returned with a human Loh had yet to catch the name of. All Loh knew was that she was stunningly beautiful with lilac eyes as charming as Stryg’s. Nel, was her name, or so Holo called her.

  There were few women Loh considered almost too beautiful to be true. Beauty came in many ways, Loh knew this. Many would consider Tauri’s bust modest, though they’d all be fools if they failed to notice her shapely legs and a wide bottom that seemed carved by the gods.

  Queen Ophelia had been a different sort of beauty; tall, lithe, and with a face that seemed almost ethereal and fey-like in nature. Loh knew her own looks were similar, but she also knew she fell short. It would be hard-pressed to find any woman whose visage was refined as Ophelia Thorn.

  Loh glanced at Lily standing beside her, who had politely declined to sit down. And yet somehow, this vampiress stood apart. A sultry hourglass figure, scarlet eyes as charming as Nel, and a visage as enticing as Opehelia’s was ethereal.

   If Loh had learned anything about women who seemed almost too beautiful to be true, it was that she had to be very careful around them. Especially this vampiress who seemed a little too friendly.

  She remembered Louise’s smile, simple yet heartwarming, a small scar on her lip from when she had fallen as a child. There was a beauty in her imperfections and Loh found herself missing her all the more.

  Unalla opened the door, breathlessly, and bowed to Nel and Holo. “Sorry, I’m late. I got here as quickly as I could. Lady Holo. Lady Melantha.”

  Lady Melantha?

  Loh did a double take. She couldn’t be the Melantha. Could she?

  As if reading her thoughts, the woman in question glanced at her and her lips curled in the faintest of smirks.

  A shiver ran down Loh’s spine.

  Holo clapped her hands together. “George isn’t here yet, but I’m sure Dolores can fill him in later.”

  And with that Holo began her story.

~~~

  Holo spoke of an enemy that had been unknown to them, an enemy that lay behind the warlord Marek and the valley armies. But to Loh, the Monster in the Dark wasn’t unknown. Thoughts of the creature had tormented Loh’s dreams and not a day had gone by that she didn’t recall the night at Widow’s Crag.

  The creature had haunted the first Noir and had been a plague on her family ever since. Loh had let her envy consume her and she had abandoned her brother to this Monster. It had devoured his soul, never to be reborn. Aizel was gone and though she had once hated her brother, he had never deserved such a fate.

  The fact that Holo was now telling them the Monster was a god made little difference to Loh. The Monster was already a baleful god in her eyes. Seemingly limitless power. Impervious to all harm. And a hunger to devour souls. Loh had fought the creature with a force of elite mages and they had been slaughtered.

  Now this Monster, the god of the deep earth, had attacked their city and had taken the lives of thousands. What more would it take from them? How would they stop Caligo? Was it even possible to kill a god?

  As if to make matters worse, Holo began talking about the god’s true nature. A monarch of an ancient queendom, a people long forgotten by most. Titans. The more Holo spoke, the more insurmountable Loh’s enemy became.

  And then Holo said something Loh had begun to suspect. Holo herself was a goddess, not only that, but so was Melantha, the Jade Saintess of Heroes.

  Holo wasn’t sure which was more shocking. That she was sitting in the same room as her favorite heroine from the stories her grandfather used to tell her or that said heroine was a bonafide goddess.

  A glimmer of hope sparked in Loh’s heart. If Melantha the Blue was on her side, then there was a chance they could defeat the ancient monster that was Queen Ananta.

  Loh had so many questions, but every time she wanted to speak up, Lily touched her shoulder and gently shook her head. Loh wanted to tell her off, but the look in Lily’s scarlet eyes told her to wait.

  For what?

  Loh didn’t know, but she thought it prudent to stay quiet rather than interrupt the gods. Her cousin, Unalla, did not share such a sentiment. She immediately began to question Holo about the other gods of the Ebon Pantheon and how they might help in the battles to come.

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  “Stjerne is my father,” replied Holo. Melantha smacked her arm with the back of her hand. “He is our father, the Calamity of Death,” Holo corrected herself.

  Wait.

  The old patron god of the drows was Lady Holo’s father!?

  Even now there were many drows who still worshipped him, in the hopes that Stjerne may someday answer their prayers. If what Holo said was true, then was she and Melantha the answer to those prayers?

  “Grandmother.”

  Unalla’s voice broke Loh out of her thoughts.

  Had she just called Holo her grandmother?

  Loh opened her mouth to speak, but Lily leaned down and whispered into her ear, “Wait. You will have time to ask all your questions later.”

  Loh tried her best not to shiver as Lily’s warm breath touched her neck. She tilted her head and glared at the vampiress. “How do you know?” she asked in the calmest voice she could muster.

  “The gods of death are not to be trifled with. Your cousin is only spared because she is Lady Holo’s granddaughter.”

  Melantha looked at Lily and Loh as if she could hear everything they were whispering. If she was a god then maybe she could. Loh closed her mouth and hoped she hadn’t offended the goddess.

  Then Stryg spoke and shattered any semblance of calmness Loh had left. “Because I am Stjerne’s son,” he answered Unalla’s angry voice.

  Loh sat stunned and for the first time, she truly had no idea what to say. She thought she was ready for whatever secrets Stryg might still have. She was wrong. So very wrong.

  If Stryg was the son of Stjerne and the brother of Holo, then he wasn’t only related to the gods. He was Unalla’s uncle. He was her family. And in some way, Loh was part of that family.

  The thought of being whole, a family at peace with one another, drifted in Loh’s mind for a brief moment, before the gravity of his words began to settle in. What were the implications of a demigod standing on the Veres throne? The proclamation of House Katag’s support suddenly became very dangerous. Were they really going to make him king of Hollow Shade?

  There were many nobles opposed to the thought, Great and Minor Houses alike. The current Seven Ruling Houses had overthrown the last Royal House of Hollow Shade. The nobility had not forgotten the dangerous power that was the Ebon Lords. They would most likely fight if Stryg tried to proclaim himself king.

  But what if his sister goddesses aided him? Many would die either way. A civil war, the likes of which the city hadn’t seen since the fall of House Thorn. Hollow Shade was still recovering from the siege, it couldn’t bear another war.

  “Why don’t we take a break for dinner, hm?” said Holo.

~~~

  Holo chewed another slice of steak and groaned as it practically melted in her mouth. “Lorenz, I don’t know how you do it, but your skills are godly.”

  The chef grinned abashedly, “Thank you, my lady. Might I offer you another glass of wine to go with?”

  “Yes, that would be lovely,” Holo nodded and held up her empty glass.

  “Um, Lady Holo, might I have a word?” asked Dolores quietly.

  Holo glanced at the woman sitting across from her. She hadn’t touched her wine at all. Everyone else had already finished their food and had wandered off, save for Dolores. Holo let them be, she was still enjoying her meal. “Lorenz, please give us the room.”

  Lorenz bowed and left, while silently ushering the rest of the staff out of the dining room.

  Holo sipped her wine. “So, what would you like to talk about?”

  “Why did you really invite me tonight?”

  “I don’t follow.”

  Dolores scoffed self-deprecatingly. “You spoke of gods and ancient wars, magics so powerful that they changed the realms. I am not a mageborn. I am not a general. I am not a scholar. I am hardly even a noble these days. I didn’t belong in that room.”

  “I wouldn’t be so certain about that. You were there for the same reason the others were.” Holo reached over and grabbed her hand. “You are family.”

  “Family?” she chuckled bitterly. “What have I done that is worthy of being family?”

  “I do not judge you on your past, only what you do now in the present. If there is anyone who can help your daughter through what she is going through, I believe it is you.”

  “I am not so certain. She hasn’t needed my help in a long time,” she whispered.

  “It is the job of a parent to believe in their child. That does not mean we cease being there for them, even when they stand on their own.”

  “Holo, we need to talk,” said Melantha from the doorway.

  “Of course, we do, right when I was about to get my third plate of food,” Holo sighed and stood to her feet. “I’m afraid we’ll have to continue this conversation later, Dolores.”

  “Not at all. I’m sorry for being a burden. Thank you for your time,” Dolores bowed.

  Holo walked around the table and hugged her. “You are no burden, child. Your father may have made you believe you were weak and unworthy of his attention, but he was wrong.” She cupped Dolores’ face in her hands, “You are every bit the Noir that he was. There is strength in you, Dolores.”

  And with that, Holo let her go and walked away with her sister, leaving Dolores alone, stunned into silence.

~~~

  Loh finished her dinner quickly, then split away from Lily, and went in search of Stryg. The vampire secretary seemed to always be nearby these days. She knew it was a habit of seneschals and the right hands of powerful lords, but it was still an odd feeling.

  After a few minutes, Loh spotted Stryg standing out on the balcony. She paused in the hallway and went into a side room to gather her thoughts. She wanted to ask him about his father, of how much he knew about his titan blood.

  Loh suspected he hadn’t known until recently. Stryg was terrible at keeping secrets and she could see how it weighed on him when he had spoken about Stjerne. Then again, Loh hadn’t known that Stryg was a Veres. Perhaps he hadn’t known either, but if he had then it would explain his close relationship with Clypeus Gale.

  Veres I had riddled the Northern Lands of the realm in blood to avenge the death of Gale I. She shivered to think what Stryg might do. Questions for another time. For now, all she wanted to know was that he was okay.

  “Elohnoir?”

  She turned and came face to face with her mother.

  “Can we talk?” asked Dolores anxiously.

  “...What do you want to talk about?” she replied in a cold, despondent voice.

  She wrung her hands. “I stopped drinking.”

  “Lily informed me.”

  “She seems to know everything, that one,” Dolores smiled feebly.

  “How long?”

  “Pardon?”

  “How long will you stop drinking for? Just for the mourning period? Or do you plan on being sober only until Lady Holo leaves?”

  Dolores gently shook her head. “I’m done. I’m not drinking ever again.”

  Loh scoffed. “Says the woman who’s been drunk every day for the last several years.”

  Dolores stared at the ground in shame. “I lost myself after Aizel… You’re right, there wasn’t a day that went by when I didn't wake up hungover. Until I saw you carrying my father’s body in your arms. I saw the pain in your eyes and I saw myself. You were hurting and I wasn’t there for you… I never was there for you.”

  “I…” Dolores took a deep shaky breath. “I’m so sorry. I was selfish. I was a coward. I’ve always run away from my problems. I wasn’t born with magic, like you. And I somehow convinced myself that your magic made you strong. That you could somehow bear all of my father’s impossible expectations all alone. I thought… I thought you were better off without— this,” she gestured to herself.

  “But I realize now that I was only trying to protect myself. I can’t keep running away.” Dolores looked up and forced herself to meet Loh’s gaze. “I know you don’t want me around, I know you don’t need my help. I know that, but… I want you to know that even if you hate me for the rest of your life, I will be here for you. I am not going anywhere.”

  Loh swallowed the lump in her throat. “Mom… I don’t—”

  “You don’t have to say anything.” Dolores rubbed her eyes. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to put you on the spot. I just wanted you to know.”

  “...You’re right. We can’t keep running away…” Loh mumbled in a hollow voice.

  She sniffed. “Elohnoir?”

  “The night Aizel ran away from the military encampment, I found out and sent Vayu Glaz to find him with his hawk. Vayu found him before the enemy had enclosed on Aizel and the caravan.” Loh’s voice trembled with every word, “I had a chance to send a battalion of soldiers to save him.”

  “What are you saying?” she whispered in a fearful voice.

  Loh closed her as tears slipped down her cheeks. “I hated him. I hated that you and Dad loved him more than you could ever love me. I hated that Tauri chose him over me. I thought that if he was gone then maybe…” She smiled weakly, “Then maybe you all might love me. But all I did was break your hearts.”

  Dolores stared at her, eyes wide, her eyes full of tears and confusion. “Elohnoir…”

  “The Monster in the Dark was with Marek when it happened. Ananta killed my brother and devoured his soul. Aizel is gone. Forever. If I had gone to help nothing would have changed, but I didn’t know that at the time… I chose to let my brother die.” Loh walked past her mother and stopped without turning around. “So you don’t have to be there for me. You can just hate me. I deserve nothing else.”

  Loh hurried away and wiped her tears.

  It had to be done, she told herself.

  She was done hiding behind lies. Even if it cost her everyone she cared about, she was done.

  Loh walked down the hallway and knocked on the balcony’s stone doorway.

  Stryg turned around, his eyes curious.

  “Can we talk?”