Chapter 539: Child of the Moon
Lunae turned to Stryg with a warm smile, “Finally, we’re alone. I was hoping we could speak earlier, but I’ve been busy with—”
“Did you know?” Stryg asked curtly.
Her smile faltered. “Know what?”
“Did you know I was the son of Stjerne?”
Her gaze grew solemn. “...I did. You deserve to know the truth about the day you were born.”
“The day I was born…?” Stryg’s voice trailed off. “I’ve heard the story.”
Lunae grabbed his hand and gently pulled him onto a chair. “Not the full story. You’ve never really understood its significance.”
“That I was born under a moonless sky? A bad omen among any tribe,” he said with an edge to his voice.
“Do you know when stars shine brightest?”
He looked at her uncertainly.
Lunae smiled softly. “When the sky is darkest, when the moon is nowhere to be seen. The night sky welcomed your birth. An omen certainly, but not the kind you’ve been led to believe.”
Ever since Ananta had told him about his heritage he felt as if everything he had ever known had been thrown into question. He had hoped the Mother Moon would have put those worries to rest but her words only made him question even more.
“Why did no one ever tell me?” he whispered. “If I was the son of Stjerne, the son of a god, why not tell me anything?”
Lunae sat next to him, across the table. “The night you were born Stjerne snuck into your village, without any goblin the wiser. I watched him from afar. He was aware of my presence, but he did not care. …8 seconds. That’s how long it took for him to look at you and deem you unworthy. He abandoned you, Stryg, as he’s done with many of his children through the ages.”
Stryg swallowed the sudden lump in his throat. “I— I don’t understand.”
She sighed quietly. “You need to understand what it means to be a titan, what makes us different. When the World Soul created the elven elder elemental species, the elder kindred, she imbued them each with a facet of her own magic, the eleven elements. As time went on she created other elementals, a new generation, what some call the lesser or younger elementals. Unlike the elders, they were mortal.”
“Mortal?”
“Yes, think of species like the fairies and trolls of this realm. They are the lesser elementals; they’ve inherited a smaller fragment of magic from the World Soul.”
“And what does this have to do with Stjerne or me?”
Lunae extended a claw and scratched ten deep lines into the wooden table. “The sea serpents are the first water elementals, the elder kin. There are several lesser elemental species with the gift of water, such as the frost giants, or the sirens who inherited both the gifts of water and wind. Phoenixes are the elder fire elementals, but now the fire giants carry the gift of fire as well, albeit to a minor extent. Every elemental gift bestowed upon the elder kindred was inherited by lesser elementals, all except for one. Care to guess which?”
“Chaos… My professors told me chaos does not bond to any living creature.”
“Mostly true, with one exception. Titans. We are the only species to have ever possessed the power of chaos.”
Stryg scratched an eleventh line into the table. “Why? Why are titans different?”
“Because chaos is the element of change. Chaotic energy is incredibly unstable and volatile. In large concentrations it can prove fatal to others, rather it is fatal. Titans are special in this matter. You see, our species is— unique. Of all the elder kindred, we are the closest to the World Soul, and like her, our existence is deeply entwined with the nature of all the Null Realms. When the Realms prosper so do we and when the world was Sundered… so were we.”
Stryg knew little about the Sundering, but he had grown up around nature. “I’ve never felt particularly close to any of the other Null Realms,” he added off-handedly.
“And yet death pervades in every single one of those lands.”
“I am not Death.”
“Half of you is. Can you separate half your existence from the other?”
Stryg frowned, but thought it better to not argue against a goddess.
Lunae saw the mental battle happening behind his eyes and smirked sympathetically, “Titans share little with each other in terms of appearance. We are the sons and daughters of chaos and it is reflected in our bodies. Some of us are born blue, others silver. Some with three eyes, some with none at all. Some with wings, others with claws and fangs.”
Lunae went on, “Unlike other elder kindred whose children are all born with powerful gifts, a titan’s gifts can range widely. It is common for titans to be born with powers inferior to other elder kindred. However, sometimes a titan is born with special gifts, powers so great that people have worshiped them through the ages.”
“The gods,” Stryg whispered.
“We’ve been called as such, yes. In our culture, the talents you were born with oftentimes determined your value in the eyes of society. Every single titan is born unique, save for hybrids who seem to inherit the appearance of their titan parent.” Lunae’s expression grew solemn, “Which brings us to your father. Our species has a very low birth rate, even worse than other elder kindred. There are few of us left now. Your father sought to rectify this, for his own reasons.”
“You mean people like me and Holo? Hybrids,” he guessed.
Lunae nodded. “The problem with titan hybrids is the same reason why there are no other chaotic species.”
Stryg thought of Ananta and the story she had told him of her birth. “Chaos mana. It’s fatal, like void mana,” he guessed.
“Not exactly. Void mana drains energy from its surroundings, it could prove fatal to the mother, but the newborn would be safe enough so long as the mother could endure the pregnancy. Chaos on the other hand is actually unstable, constantly changing, resulting in destructive energies. A hybrid’s body can’t adapt to the constant changes and simply dies, usually in the first month of pregnancy. The mothers don’t tend to fare well either.”
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A shiver ran down Stryg’s spine at her words. His face paled as her words sunk in. “Wait, are you saying if I get someone pregnant I could kill them?”
“In small quantities, chaotic energy is harmless, but seeing as you are half-titan, and the son of one of the most powerful titans to have ever lived, your chaotic energy is as potent as any pure-blooded titan.”
“Meaning?” he whispered anxiously.
“Yes, if you impregnate a woman the unborn child would most likely die and there’s about a 50/50 chance that she would as well.”
Stryg sank into his chair, “Oh gods…”
“Not that you have to worry about such things.”
“What?”
Lunae looked at him flatly. “Stryg, titans aren’t like goblins. Sexual and reproductive maturity do not occur at the same time. Your body may have sexually matured, but you won’t be able to actually reproduce for a long time still.”
Stryg narrowed his eyes suspiciously. “What exactly is a long time?”
“It could be decades.”
“Decades?”
She shrugged. “Or centuries.”
“Centuries!?”
He had never thought much about children, Feli had brought up the topic on occasion. Supposedly hybrids couldn’t have any, though he heard rumors to the contrary. And with the existence of his mother, he had confirmed those rumors to be true. What was he supposed to tell Feli now?
Lunae smiled, “Oh, Little One, in the eyes of a titan you are a hatchling, a pup. You are immortal, you will live thousands of years. I know that may be difficult to wrap your mind around now, but when you look back someday you will truly understand how young you are.”
Stryg frowned. “So you’re saying I’m a baby then?”
“I’m saying you still have a lot of growing to do.” She patted his head, “You’ve clearly gone through your first growth spurt, but titans keep growing for centuries. Someday you’ll be as tall as me, I wager.”
Stryg looked over her short teenage appearance with a raised eyebrow. He wanted to say she was hardly taller than any goblin at the moment, but he had seen Lunae in her true form. She towered over anyone, save Ananta.
He looked down at his hands, they shook with a slight tremble. “I don’t… I don’t want to be different,” he whispered.
“To whom?”
Stryg cleared his throat. “The night I was born. My father. What exactly happened?”
Lunae sighed. “Your father has sired several children in the past. You have to understand, most pregnancies between titans and others never make it far; the unborn child is unable to handle the elemental chaos coursing through their own veins. The pregnancies that do reach full term often result in stillbirths.”
“I clearly survived.”
“Yes, you did. Rarely, a few hybrids do survive, but that is only because the newborn did not inherit the chaotic bloodline of their titan parent whatsoever. They do not possess chaos mana, they are mortal, no different than say any goblin from your tribe. Or in your father’s eyes, a failure. Rarely, very rarely, a hybrid child is born having inherited the element of chaos.”
“And I was one of them.”
“You were not. That is why your father found you unworthy. The moment he set eyes on you he realized you possessed no traces of chaotic mana. He lost interest and left. Your mother didn’t even know he had been there.” Lunae glanced away and stared at the ceiling, “As for me… Well, as far as I was concerned a hybrid like you should not have existed. Gods do not enjoy when other gods meddle in their people’s affairs, especially when the woman in question happens to be your Favored.”
“My mother…”
She nodded stiffly. “Your father had abandoned you, I saw no reason to hold back my Favored’s life.”
His eyes widened slowly. “You were going to kill me… So my mother could keep her oaths as your priestess.”
“...I was, but I was wrong,” she corrected hastily. “I was wrong, Stryg. About you. About everything.”
“Because I inherited the element of chaos after all?” he said grimly. “Is that why you made me your Chosen? Because I am the son of Stjerne? The son of Death?”
“No!” She jumped up from her seat, gripped his shoulders, and looked him in the eyes. “I chose you because you are worthy even without all of it. You may never understand what I’m about to tell you, but please believe me; you saved me, Stryg. I— I was lost in a pit of despair, but you found me in that darkness and you saved me.”
Stryg wrinkled his brow, “What? I don’t—”
“Listen to me,” she caressed his cheek. “You, a mere child, saved a goddess. And it wasn’t through your magic or skill with a weapon. It was because of your heart.”
“My heart…?” His expression darkened and he couldn’t help but laugh bitterly. “What do you know of my heart? Did you hear Melfyn? He said I have the heart of a Sylvan. But that couldn’t be further from the truth.”
“Stryg, that’s not what I meant.”
“Of course, it isn’t. Because you never had to prove to anyone that you were a Sylvan, that you belonged right there with them. My whole life I fought with everything I had to prove, no, to earn a spot among my tribe; that I was Sylvan, even if I didn’t look like it.”
“Little One…”
He got up from his chair and stepped back. “When I came to Hollow Shade people didn’t even know what a Sylvan was, to them I was just a freak. So I had to prove myself again, to show them what it meant to be Sylvan, that I was Sylvan.”
His shoulders trembled and a tear slipped down his cheek.
“All I ever wanted was to be one of them. A goblin. A Sylvan. I’ve been fighting to prove to everyone, to all of them… to myself, that I belong. And I thought I had finally done it. I found where I belonged. I am the War Master. I am Sylvan… But it turns out I’m not.” He laughed brokenly, “I am exactly what they said. I’m different. An outsider. I’m— I’m not a goblin. Gale says I’m a Veres, but I’m not a vampire, not like Callum or Elise. I’m not even mortal!”
He ran his hands across his drooping pointed ears and bit his lip. “I don’t belong with any of them. Ananta was right, I’m a monster. Just like her. And you.”
Lunae walked over and wiped the tears from his cheek. “In the eyes of the sheep, the wolf will always be a monster. Though goblin, vampire, and drow blood flow through your veins, you may not feel as if you are any one of them, but make no mistake, Stryg, you are Sylvan, and no one, no one, can take that from you, not even me.”
He leaned into her embrace and mumbled weakly, “I feel so lost. They’re all counting on me to lead them. But I don’t know how to save them. If the World Soul is dying what am I supposed to do? I couldn’t even save my mother. How can I save all the Null Realms?”
“By opening your eyes and seeing that you are not alone. You may feel lost, but I am here, your sisters are here; people who understand what you are going through. This burden was never yours alone to bear. Taking on all the problems around yourself is a flaw you’ve had since you were a child. Stryg, you may have been born into this war of titans but we’ve been fighting it for thousands of years. We will not let the Realms fall. And no matter what happens, no matter how many centuries pass us by, I will not abandon you, I promise you that. You will never be alone, you will always have a place you belong.”
“Why?” he whispered.
She smiled wryly. “My Little One, that’s what it means to be a Mother.”
He had so many questions but he felt so at ease simply resting in her arms. It felt familiar. His worries ebbed away as he leaned his head on her shoulder and closed his eyes. “Thank you, Mother Moon.”
“...Stryg.”
“Hm?”
“I know you wish to know more about your father, but may I suggest you clean yourself up first and head to the Villa District. Your lover may need help with her dinner guests.”
He stiffened. “The Katag’s dinner! Shit, I’m late!”