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Project 17: 戦の腐界「Sen No Fukai]
Chapter 45: Regrettable Choices

Chapter 45: Regrettable Choices

Tousen was just as breathtaking as Kanashi had imagined. There were skyscrapers as far as the eye could see. Large and colorful electric signs hung from above and music filled the streets.

Any other time Kanashi would frolic through the streets buying a dragon's hoard worth of books, figures and other merchandise but he instead solemnly watched the crowds of people move across the streets from the rooftop he was perched on.

I always thought my first trip to Edo would be an experience to remember and while I can’t say it hasn't been one it’s definitely not the kind I was hoping for.

As the end of the day approached with the sun lowering in the sky, people began to leave their places of work and the buzz of the night life quietly began to rumble. The Tousen night life was a very well known secret across the world. When the sun went down the party animals came out. Or at least in the central and western districts that was the case.

Those normally shy and polite citizens were replaced with party animals who would drink and riot in the streets releasing their inner frustration at society’s endless cycle of monotony. Despite the craziness, casualties were extremely rare, the most dangerous aspect of this city wide part was your liver exploding.

At one point in time this metropolis was just a collection of wood and mud brick huts that housed centuries of bloody warfare. Those structures were eventually torn down and replaced with the sterilized glass and concrete monoliths plaguing the city today. Just like their homes and place of work the people too were replaced, forgotten and lost to the waves of time.

At one point you were undeniably going to be forgotten. No matter how big a stain one leaves on history eventually the tablets their names are carved into would too fade just like the place they called home.

The meaningless of life was unavoidable and apparent, and that ate at Kanashi.

What’s even the point of living? Everyone here acknowledges their mundane existence and tries to numb that unending pain with alcohol and drugs yet it’s unavoidable. You’ll be forgotten eventually no matter how hard you try to forget that. I mean what’s even the point of living in the first place? All life is based on suffering at the end of the day, we take from others to make ourselves happy, that's the undeniable truth about life. It’s built upon the suffering of others. In that case isn’t it better to just not be alive at all? Either way we’re going to die so why suffer during the short time we’re here on this planet? This whole thing is over the Horseman right? Is them winning even a bad thing? They could end this cycle, they could exterminate all life, they could end all the suffering in this universe. Kanashi's eyes widened as these thoughts permeated his mind.

“Tch, look at me still thinking about this stuff. This is the Venator Society's problem now, not mine.” He laughed to himself awkwardly.

No, it still is my problem, I’m still affected by it only now I have no input on the matter. Was it really a mistake to quit? I thought I made the wrong choice but this feeling in my chest is telling me I’m wrong. It’s not even been a full day yet so maybe I can Nordon and beg and cry to be let back on? But is that really what I want? Do I want to be a part of the Venator Society for the sake of the Venator Society or because I want a purpose? If that’s the case I’m not any different then the people down there, just another victim to the endless cycle of existence clinging onto a meaning for my suffering. Even though I was given a purpose by the Venator Society I messed it up in every way imaginable. I don’t deserve to have a purpose, I should just be happy to live the same life as everyone else down there. To work until I die, I’m the exact same as that boy in his bedroom wondering what to do with his life.

The sun had begun to set and an ominous bright orange glow was cast over the horizon. Bars and clubs opened their doors and the timer until the city wide party began clicked closer and closer to starting.

“Tch, what am I even thinking about?” Kanashi scoffed, his face contouring into a nervous smile. “I need to start living in the moment, that way I don't even need to think about this kind of thing. If this is my last night here I might as well make it one to remember.

# # #

The sun had set completely and the party had officially begun. Being a Friday night things were going to be extra crazy. Office workers were passed out drunk on the sidewalk, their ties wrapped around their forehead and pants soaked in alcohol filled urine. The “Nice Ladies” hollered out prices and grabbed onto the arms of passing men. Fights broke out between all genders and age with no prejudice only to end as soon as they began with all participants collapsing into a drunken stupor.

It was certainly a wild event. One Kanashi had never before experienced and he felt sick to his stomach. The butterflies had been replaced with enraged wasps who stung his intestinal lining with a fury. But despite all this his excitement was undeniable.

I was alway a good kid who stayed inside and never went to parties… but that wasn’t because I wanted to be one, I just didn’t have any friends. In fact I looked down on those who did but now that I’m in the middle of it… I can’t help but feel like I’ve been missing out!

Kanashi continued to look around for an establishment that peaked his interest and eventually he found one. It was much smaller and quieter then the others he’d seen and had a nice girl who looked to be straight out of an anime as the mascot. She stood outside hollering at people to come join the party in both Edogo and broken Shinkai.

“Excuse me.” Kanashi muttered as he approached the girl.

“Hm?” She hummed, turning to him with a confused smile.

“C-can I please hang out here?” He choked out.

“?” The girl tilted her head to the side and puckered her lips as if she didn’t understand the question.

“I-ummm.” Kanashi stuttered.

What a stupid question to ask! This is why I didn’t have any friends, now she thinks I'm weirdo! I can’t stay here any longer. All these people saw me and thought the same thing! They all think I’m a freak! I need to run away and never come back here!

Without speaking another word Kanashi quickly walked away as fast and casually as he could without breaking out into a full run.

The only person to notice him and hear his question was the girl dressed as the mascot who was now even more confused than before. For she didn’t speak Shinkai in the first place.

Kanashi continued to walk through the streets for another half hour until he found a second place that seemed promising. Like the previous establishment it was fairly quiet with only a few people inside. Being tucked into an alley Kanashi needed to squeeze his way into it and once inside he could appreciate the place's quaint atmosphere. It was nearly empty with only two dozen or so people composed mostly of middle aged men and elderly women playing Mahjong while downing cheap beer.

Kanashi took a seat at the bar and tried to act as casual as possible, waiting for the bartender to notice him. His heart nearly bursting from his chest.

After a few minutes the bartender looked up and around the place taking notice of Kanashi before turning back to the cross word puzzle under him.

“!”

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What the hell! Talk about poor customer service! Kanashi grumbled, he looked around to see if anyone else had noticed the blatant prejudice but no one seemed to pay mind to him either.

“Guess I’ll have to go somewhere else then…” He growled.

“But this is the best place around here.” A voice from behind him came.

“!?” Kanashi spun around and was greeted by a towering mountain of a man behind him.

The man had black hair slicked back and nicely trimmed facial hair. He wore a bright red Hawaiian shirt with a yellow floral pattern and jean shorts with crocs.

“I-is that so…” Kanashi muttered nervously.

“Do you mind if I take a seat next to you?” The man asked.

“No, that's fine with me, go ahead!” Kanashi said motoning to the stool next to him.

“Thank you.” The man laughed while taking his seat, he laid his thick and hairy arms on the counter and knocked loudly on the dark brown wood grabbing the bartender's attention.

The bartender made a shocked expression upon seeing the man and ran over to him, his toupe nearly flying off his head as he did so.

“How can I help you Taishi-Sama?” The man asked in humble Edogo, bowing his head.

“Give me a bottle of Green Dragon.” Taishi ordered.

“Of course! I’ll fetch you one immediately!” The bartender said, turning away.

“Where are you going?” Taishi asked sternly.

“To fetch you a bottle of-” The man whimpered out before being cut off.

“Don’t you see my friend here next to me? Serve him as well.”

“O- of course! We normally don’t serve foreigners but I’ll make an exception for you!” The bartender laughed, turning to Kanashi.

“Do you speak Edogo?” Taishi asked Kanashi.

“I can say “Sake.” Kanashi joked wryly.

“What'd Ya want then? I’ll tell him.” Taishi laughed.

“Ummm, I’ll have whatever you had I guess.” Kanashi shrugged.

“Hohoho!” Taishi chuckled, “Daring, aren't we Boy? I like that! Bartender get him a Green Dragon, on me!”

The bartender obeyed Taishi and ran into the back room to fetch the liquor while Kanashi and Taishi sat at the bar talking.

“What’re you in Edo for?” He asked Kanashi.

“Well, I was here for work but things didn’t end up the way I hoped.” Kanashi sighed, drooping his head.

“Is that so? I hear that's common with foreigners, the culture of Edo can be very strict to people not born here. Almost suffocating at times.”

“Yeah… What do you do?” Kanashi asked.

“I’m a business owner.” Taishi answered.

“Oh really? Man, I wish I could start a business and be rich.”

“You don't have to start the business, I started off as a grunt and worked my way up. Of course my circumstances are different from yours but you can do it too.”

“I hope so…” Kanashi sighed, letting his head hit the counter.

The bartender returned from the back room with two large green bottles with the Kanji [緑龍酒] For “Green Dragon Alcohol” written across it.

He quickly pulled out a small glass for Kanashi which he filled with ice and then poured half full with the golden yellow pungent liquid.

As for Taishi he gave him the large bottle itself which he cracked open with a flick of his finger before taking a chug of it.

What are you Hanma Yujirou? Kanashi thought with an awkward smile.

“This is the good stuff boy, don’t let it go to waste!” Taishi laughed, putting the now halfway empty bottle on the counter.

Kanashi turned and looked at the glass in front of him. The golden yellow thick syrup like liquid burned his nostrils as he pulled it up to his mouth. With a deep breath he cocked his head back, mouth wide open and dumped the liquid into his throat.

“!”

The liquid tasted foul, worse than anything he’d ever drank before, it burned going down and not in a good way, it felt like he’d drinken molten shit and he nearly vomited afterwards.

“Gah!” He coughed pounding on his chest.

“First time?” Taishi laughed, slapping Kanashi on the back.

“N-no!” Kanashi lied as he was nearly thrown over the counter by Taishis mighty hand.

“A bottle of this stuff is enough to kill an elephant so don't go overboard with it.” Taishi said, taking another gulp of his own bottle.

“I can’t tell if you’re joking or not when you do that after telling me this…” Kanashi frowned.

“I’ve been drinking since I was in grade school, of course it was cheap beer at the time but I found a way.” Taishi said as he pulled out a large dark brown cigar which he lit with a snap of his finger.

“Wow, how’d you do that?” Kanashi asked, his eyes widening.

“Magic.” Taishi laughed as he put the cigar in his mouth.

“Isn’t it dangerous to smoke after drinking all that alcohol? Isn’t it flammable?”

“Nonsense!” Taishi huffed, blowing smoke from his mouth. “In fact, watch this!” Taishi said, opening his mouth wide and blowing fire from it.

“Holy!” Kanashi yelped, nearly falling backwards out of his chair. “Are you a magician as a side job or something!?”

“I’m just that good.” Taishi winked, drinking the last bit of his Green Dragon bottle. “Well, it’s been fun to talk but I’ve gotta go, if we see eac hother again don't be shy to come say hi.” Taishi sighed as he raised up out of his seat. He was truly tall, probably 6 '6 or so and if Kanashi had to guess easily pushing 400 lbs of pure muscle. He reached into his leather wallet and pulled out a large $500 bill which he placed onto the counter. “I bought both bottles, try not to die.” He laughed as he walked out the door.

“T-Thanks!” Kanshi called out after him. He turned to the bartender and raised his glass which the bartender quickly filled with more of the liquid death.

# # #

The planet was spinning, well that's obvious but to Kanashi it could be taken literally. His legs felt like they were made of jelly and he clung onto the wall next to him for dear life. He’d only drank another two glasses of the Green Dragon stuff so he shouldn’t have been this messed up right?

It was less than 1/6th of the bottle after all. The bartender even complimented Kanashis alcohol tolerance so that meant he should be fine right? Well Kanashi didn’t speak Edogo so maybe he only made that last part up in his head.

Either way he didn’t really care, the only thing that mattered at the moment was finding a place to relax and take a breath. Maybe even somewhere to pee.

Ugh, how can people even consider driving like this? He hiccuped, he now could relate to those he tried not to trample over as he walked down the street. They too must have felt like he did.

“Shit…” He sighed as he clung to a street light, the urge to vomit grew in his throat and he tried to flex his stomach to hold it in but his drunken body refused to work like he wanted it to.

Eventually the street light turned green and he limped across the road to a small public bathroom which he stumbled into.

“Gah!” He yelped, nearly slipping in a puddle on the floor. He grabbed onto the bowl of the sink just barely managing to stop his fall before his head smashed into the brick wall. “Couldn’t hold it!?” He screamed angrily.

Slowly working his way back up to his feet he hobbled over to the single urinal which was clogged with diarrhea and toilet paper.

“Lovely, really lovely.” He growled, turning around and limping to the bathroom stall. Kicking the door down he stumbled to the dirty toilet which was already full of other people's shit, piss and vomit.

“Ughhh.” He sighed as he released his bladder, it felt amazing like he’d been holding it his whole life. He felt warm all over a good conforming feeling. Like being tucked into a nice warm bed on a cold winter night. But he also felt wet, yes warm and wet at the same time.

“?”

Looking down he saw that he’d never even pulled his pants down.

“Fuck.”

Then everything went black.