After selecting the [Demon King of Pride] class, my mind went blank, and when I woke up I had returned to a place that I had been doubting I would ever see again. The soft hum of a ceiling fan- my ceiling fan filled my ears as I slowly sat up, shedding a soft layer of sheets. I was back in my room from Earth

  Everything was exactly as I had left it. My bed and all its pillows were in their places, my desk was covered in papers, the pilot light on my computer monitor was glowing red, and every book on my bookshelf was accounted for.

  I took a deep breath as I looked around, then did a double take when I realized that I was breathing. I tried holding my breath, but ended up releasing it soon after when my chest got uncomfortable. I reveled in my return from unlife for a few more seconds before reaching toward my nightstand for my phone.

  The date showed that it was the day after the last day I remembered on earth. For a few moments, I wondered if my time on Astraeus had all been a dream, but quickly pushed that thought away. It was far too detailed and vivid for that. So why was I back on Earth? Why had selecting the Demon King class sent me here? Was this scene a dream then? It was more likely than the other way around, but still, everything was too vivid, and my mind was too clear.

  At that moment, the heater came to life with a hum, and the scent of bacon crept through the vents and into my nostrils, and I noticed the faint popping sounds of boiling grease. I got out of bed and carefully made my way out of my room toward the kitchen. There was nothing physically wrong with me, but after six years of being accustomed to my superior physical traits on Astraeus, my original body felt sluggish and unsteady.

  As I walked down the hallway, the sound and scent of the bacon became more clear, and another sound, one of off-key humming, joined them. I turned the corner into the kitchen and was greeted by the sight of my housemate’s back while she watched over the cooking meat.

  “Ilsa,” I said.

  The girl turned around in surprise, her long blond hair flying dangerously close to the pan.

  “Lucy?” she said. “Aren’t you supposed to be in class right now?”

  I checked my phone again. “So I am.”

  “Well, then why are you here?” she asked.

  “I overslept.”

  Her green eyes narrowed in suspicion. “You never oversleep. Are you feeling sick or something?”

  “No,” I said, a bit absent-mindedly. Something about the situation was bothering me, but I couldn’t quite tell what it was. “I just had a weird dream.”

  “What about?”

  “Stuff.”

  “What stuff?”

  “It doesn’t matter.”

  She stared at me for a few seconds before turning back to the stove. “Well, I’m making bacon for me and Kara, but I guess since your here and that lazy bum is still in bed, you can have hers. Unless you need to get to class.”

  “Hmmmm… I’ll get going after the bacon,” I said. I couldn’t resist an opportunity for Earth food, even if it was a dream.

  “You should probably go get dressed then,” said Ilsa. “Unless it’s pajama day and no one told me. If that’s the case, then you watch the bacon while I go get changed.”

  “Good idea,” I said, ignoring her last comment.

  As I was halfway through turning around though, I froze, and turned back toward Ilsa as I recalled a conversation we had had shortly before Pride abducted me.

  “Wait a second,” I said. “Didn’t you say you were going to be a pescatarian now? Why are you making bacon?”

  Ilsa flinched, but did not turn around. “Uhhhh. I changed my mind.”

  It was my turn to narrow my eyes in suspicion. She was not one to go back on her word so easily, and definitely not one to give in to her desires. If anything, she would have made things more difficult for herself by going fully vegetarian.

  “You? Changed your mind?”

  “Yes,” she said confidently. Too confidently…

  “Right…” I responded.

  It was strange, and out of character for her, but it did not prove anything.

  “I’m going to go get changed then. I’ll try to wake Kara up on my way.”

  Before I exited the kitchen, however, Ilsa spoke again, this time in a loud and commanding voice. “Stop!”

  “Why?” I asked.

  “She’s not in there,” said Ilsa, who was now facing me, and frowning.

  “Why not?”

  “Because this isn’t your house. This isn’t even Earth.”

  She snapped her fingers, and our surroundings shimmered and were then replaced. The cheap tile floors became sleek marble, the undecorated, off-white walls became red with gold patterns inlaid, and the electric light overhead was replaced by a crystal chandelier. The dated kitchen appliances were replaced by more advanced, almost alien-looking ones. The old hand-me down pan from my parents’ house on the stove turned into a brand new looking one, though the sizzling sound and alluring scent of the cooking bacon remained.

  “Pride,” I said.

  “You got me,” said Pride, still in Ilsa’s form with her arms crossed.

  “Why am I here?” I asked. “What about your stupid game?”

  “Oh, it’s still going on,” she said grumpily. “You’re here so you can pick out your Demon King skills. There’s no time actually passing on Astraeus. When we’re done, you’ll get sent back and it will be like you never left.”

  “Ok, but why the charade?”

  “I thought it would be funny, watching you walk out, thinking you were going to class, only to find yourself in the hallway of my mansion. Guess I should have researched your roommates better though…”

  “Well, since you’ve been found out, let’s get down to business, so I can get out of here.”

  “Wait until the bacon is done at least,” said Pride as she turned back to the stove, grabbing a set of tongs. “Your house may have been fake, but this bacon is real. Don’t you want to have some before you head back.”

  “...Fine.”

  I sat down at a dark wooden table, and stared at not-Ilsa’s back as she flipped the bacon.

  “It’s been a while,” said Pride after a minute or so of silence. “I thought you would be here sooner. You could have selected the Demon King class safely before. It’s not possible for anyone to detect your class unless you do something to show them.”

  “Well, maybe if you had told me that, I would have,” I said.

  “I thought you would be able to figure it out yourself,” she replied.

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  “And how the hell was I supposed to do that?” I asked.

  “You spent two days with a group of high level paladins. You could have asked them.”

  “Oh yeah, I could have asked the powerful people from the organization that’s hunting me down whether it’s possible to hide my class! What a brilliant plan! Why didn’t I think of that?”

  “You would have been fine,” she said. “They didn’t know that there were demon kings yet, and by the time they learned, they probably would have forgotten about you. And even if they hadn’t, you could have been long gone.”

  “Maybe you should have mentioned something about that before sending me here,” I said.

  “I really thought you would be able to figure it out,” she said. “I would have. I guess I overestimated you.”

  “You bitch,” I said.

  “Hey, don’t get mad at me. You’re the one that made the mistake.”

  “You-!” I started.

  “Well, no point in dwelling on the past,” she said loudly as she began to take the bacon out of the pan and put it on a plate. “You’re here now and that’s all that matters.”

  I clenched my fists tightly as I glared at her, then unclenched them and took a deep breath. I had already known that Pride was a bitch, and yelling at a god probably wouldn’t be productive. I would just have to deal with it until I could leave.

  “Voila!” said Pride as she stepped toward me, setting the plate laden with half a dozen pieces of bacon down on the table. “Your meal, madam.”

  “Thanks,” I grumbled, grabbing a piece and shoving it in my mouth.

  It was still hot from the pan, but I didn’t care. I chewed it up, savoring the boiling juices as the pain and flavor filled my mouth. Blood, aside from elf blood, was monotonous in taste. Different species had minor differences, but the underlying blood flavor remained constant. This was not the case with human food, a fact which I was now so blissfully reminded of.

  “So, let’s get this over with.” I said once I had swallowed. “The class change said I got 3 custom skills. How does that work?”

  “Well, normally there would be a list of skills that you could choose from, but I took the liberty of choosing for you.”

  “You what?!”

  “Yeah, the list was really long, and there are a bunch of bad options, and you’re not familiar enough with the System to make the best decisions, so I decided I’d just pick them for you.”

  “What the hell!” I said. “Show me the list!”

  “There’s no need for that,” said Pride, waving me off. “I already picked them out for you. And the skills I picked out are better than any that you could pick out for yourself. Looking at the list is just a waste of time.”

  “Why am I even here then?” I asked.

  “Hey, I brought you here on my own goodwill to give you these new skills, and I even made you bacon,” said Pride. “Stop being so ungrateful.”

  “Ungrateful?!” I exclaimed. “You kidnapped me and sent me to a new world with almost no information and a target painted on my back, and now you’re not even letting me choose my own skills, and I’m supposed to be grateful.”

  “Of course,” she responded. “When else will you get the chance to work under me?”

  “You’re insane.”

  “I am quite sane,” she responded. “It’s you who are being unreasonable.”

  “Unreasonable?!”

  “Yes,” she said, nodding. “Very. I’m starting to regret choosing you. If I had known you were this hot-headed I might have chosen someone else.”

  “You should have!” I shouted.

  “Oh well.” She shrugged. “No point in crying over spilled milk. We just have to work with what we’ve got. And what you’ve got are three awesome new skills.”

  “Fuck you,” I said, fuming.

  “The first is another passive skill,” she said. “Though it’s a bit more of an ‘active’ passive skill than [Pride] is, if you catch my drift. It’s called [Authority], and it basically just gives you way more control than usual over mana and aura in your immediate vicinity. For mana and aura within your own body, you will be able to control it completely. Those chains won’t be able to take your mana anymore if you don’t want them to.”

  As she spoke, I slowly forced myself to be calm. Clearly, nothing I could say would change Pride’s mind. And as a god, there wasn’t really anything I could do to them. It would be better to just shut my mouth so that I could leave sooner.

  “The second is an active skill called [Domain],” she continued. “Technically, it’s a spatial spell that you could theoretically learn on your own, but it’s so advanced and powerful that it would take you a century of research to do it, and by that time, the game would already be over, so I decided to give it to you now. It uses a lot of mana, but for a limited time, you can drag yourself, and anyone around you into what’s basically your own little pocket dimension where you control all the mana. It’s basically an invincible skill against mages, and while it has a bit of a long casting time, with [Authority], no one will be able to stop you. Watch out for aura users though, because aura isn’t affected within the confines of [Domain].

  “The last is yet another passive skill called [Lone Wolf]. This one is even more passive than [Pride]. It’s essentially just an exp buff when you’re doing things alone. As long as you don’t have anyone helping you, you’ll earn way more exp. The way it calculates the multiplier is weird, and it takes into account every little bit of outside help, even if you’re not aware of it, so I can’t give you any exact numbers, but as long as you’re not in a group, you should be earning, on average, twice the amount of exp as you normally would. Any questions?”

  I shook my head as I put another piece of bacon in my mouth.

  “Good,” she said. “There’s also another pretty nice skill waiting for you once your class hits level 50. Originally, I would have given it to you now, and put [Authority] later, but you got captured, so I didn’t really have a choice. I’m not gonna tell you what it is yet, because that would spoil the surprise, but it’s a really good one.

  “Now, once you finish your bacon, I’ll send you back to your cell so you can get to escaping and maybe finally do something productive.”

  I took a deep breath to force my anger down, but did not say anything. For about half a minute, Pride watched me as I ate my bacon, struggling to find the balance between savoring the flavor and eating quickly so I could leave. That must have been too much silence for her though, because she started talking again.

  “So, I’ve been thinking lately,” she started, “this place could use some redecoration. I like the royal look, but I’ve gotten a bit tired of it lately. I was thinking I could do something a bit more modern, or maybe even futuristic, with holographic statues that move around, and a bunch of big windows everywhere to give me a nice view. What do you think?”

  I shrugged and put the last piece of bacon into my mouth.

  “But a cozy, fantasy vibe could be good too,” she continued. “I could change the layout to make it look like the inside of a giant tree. Or the outside of a giant tree, like the elves in those movies you used to like!”

  I swallowed. “I don’t care. Do whatever you want. Can I go back now?”

  “Not until you give me your opinion,” she said.

  “Fine,” I said. “Futuristic then.”

“I thought you might say that,” she said. “Fantasy it is then!”

  “What the-” I started. “Nevermind. Just send me back already.”

  “Well, if you insist.”

  She waved her hand, and my vision went dark again. When I opened my eyes, I was back in the adamantium cell, kneeling on the ground in front of my guard. I gave him a surreptitious glance, to see if he had noticed anything, but he was still standing perfectly still, watching me casually like usual.

  I got up off my knees, then sat back down, leaning my back against the cell wall as I looked at my status sheet. All the skills were present as Pride described them, and their descriptions were more or less identical to hers. With this knowledge, I began to plan how I would escape.

  The guard in the room was not a mage, but he would still notice if the constant stream of mana flowing out of me and into my chains were to be suddenly cut off, but I couldn’t just let it keep getting sucked. I carefully placed a slight limit on the amount of mana flowing out of me. I was still losing 99% of my mana, but the 1% I was keeping started to slowly refill my [MP], which had been at a constant 0 ever since the day I was captured. The guard didn’t seem to notice, so I slowly ramped up the limit, stopping once I got to 10%. He still hadn’t noticed, but I didn’t want to take too many risks. I could increase the limit again when the guard changed.

  It was still far better than nothing though. Even at 10%, my [MP] would be fully recovered within a week, and I would have enough mana to teleport out within a few hours. Ordinarily, that wouldn’t have been the case, but with [Authority], the anti-teleportation wards would have no effect on me. That, however, would not be the ideal method of escape. If I just vanished from my cell, the church would start searching for me the moment the guard made the report. I could silence him, but if I did it by making him a thrall, that could severely backfire, as I wouldn’t be surprised if Evelyn had been ordered to purify all the guards exiting my cell. And if I killed him, then I would be in even bigger trouble.

  My two options were to convincingly fake my death somehow, or make it look like someone else had broken me out against my will. The more I thought about it, the more impossible the first option seemed, so I began thinking about how I could make the second option work. An illusion to convince the guard that I was taken by someone (probably Lust), would be the best option, but on the off-chance that the guard’s perception was high enough to notice the illusion, it could cause problems. Not very large problems, but still problems, and I would rather do it cleanly if possible.

  Ideally, Lust himself would decide to visit again, and I would be able to use him as a cover for escaping, pretending that he was taking me. If Lust showed up again though, he would probably kill the guard though, and the poor man hadn’t done anything to deserve that. I would just have to settle for an illusion, and hope that it would be enough to fool him. With that settled, all I had left to do was wait for my [MP] to charge up.

  Five hours later, my guard changed, and I was able to increase my [MP] recovery to 80% without him noticing. By the time his shift was over six hours later, my [MP] was almost a fifth full, and as I waited for the new guard to enter, I prepared to increase my rate again. However, I had to halt my plans, for the next person to enter was not a paladin, but Sylvia, and from her expression, she seemed to be very pleased with herself.