Beads of water echo whenever they burst on the ground. Every sound here sends a shiver down my spine, dries out my throat and devours the seconds it takes for Lunala to release us. The world around us resembles a stalactite cave. Deep darkness is illuminated by dimly glowing crystals and when I look up, there is only blackness. Rocks in the shape of flowers give our surroundings the charm of the deepest seas, and yet there is no water anywhere.
“Are we ... in a cave?” Lillie is also unsure of our surroundings.
“It’s a crevice,” replies Lunala. “A long time ago, a Pokémon stole the sun from this dimension. It only left a few of the glowing stones behind, which will also fade away one day.”
“And you are from this place?” Without further ado, Lillie turns to the Pokémon. “Or is that what the guardian deities told you?”
It nods stiffly. “The Tapus told me about it. About this world, this dimension. You humans named it the Ultra Space. But in truth, this is just one place of many in the cosmos that was once created.”
“That means ... my father is in some dimension ... one of many...” Lillie’s gaze drops. “Mum must have searched for a long time.”
“She did,” Nebby confirms. “She realised that all the dimensions and all the worlds that have been created are connected through us Pokémon. She thought she could force me to open an Ultra Wormhole to find him, but it’s not possible for me to find someone in another world if they’ve travelled through a hole I haven’t opened.”
It’s our luck that Lusamine slipped through the Ultra Wormhole that Cosmog created. Otherwise, Lillie’s chances of seeing her again would be slim.
“Then it’s time to look for her!” Straightening her shoulders, she sets her sights on the only path ahead.
“I’ll wait for you here,” Lunala adds. “If I stray too far from this hole, it will close. It’s safer to keep this connection between this dimension and yours as long as it exists.”
I can’t say I like going without Nebby, but it’s one of those hurdles I have to overcome. Lillie is already striding ahead, braver than ever, and all that’s left for me to do is watch her go.
“You don’t have to be afraid,” breathes Nebby behind me. “I’ve been watching you because Lillie really likes you. Your strength lies in your adaptability, your ability to learn, and your reckless courage. You may have a long way to go, but if you maintain your fire, it will change you into someone who will never have to hide behind others again.”
“And you think I can prove that here and now?”
“I believe you need to have faith here and now that Mimikyu will recover and that your partners will learn with every fight. You aren’t taking this journey alone. The burdens of defeat don’t lie solely on your shoulders.” Lunala slowly lowers a bit towards me. “Give them a chance to fight battles they won’t regret.”
I swallow. It’s right, and yet the weight doesn’t leave my heart.
“It never will,” the Pokémon throws in. “And you’ll grow.”
I clench my hands into fists and take a deep breath. I can’t hide forever, I know that. My body is weak and drained. Regret gnaws at every fibre of my being. A lot of things are going over my head, but I have to get up; pull myself together, knock off the dirt, and move on. There is no other way I have a chance of becoming someone who will one day show my father that he has worried for nothing.
I want to reveal to him how I can face this world and even if I feel like a toddler in front of a Graveler, every step will carry me forward. I’ve whined enough for the moment. Now it’s time to help Lillie.
So I follow along the poorly lit path in quick strides until I catch up with her, panting. Her smile is cheerful, but the cold sweat on my skin still can’t make friends with this dimension.
The echo of our footsteps is thrown back to us threefold and only when someone else’s loud exclamation slips in between do we pause. For the blink of an eye, all we hear is a single breath. No one is within reach. No one is hiding behind us.
“Up here!”
A quick glance up the stone wall brings Guzma to the fore. Settled on a ledge, one of his legs dangles listlessly. His white hair sticks out more wildly than usual and it seems to take him an eternity to gather the last of his strength and come down to us.
He bridges the distance with swaying steps – his eyes even darker rimmed than usual. The glass of the shades on his head is cracked and his clothes smell like he hasn’t showered in four years.
“You’re stupid, aren’t you?” A soundless laugh escapes him. “Really bloody dumb! Where do you think we are? I don’t even want to know how you got here. But I can tell you to get lost. Now.”
“Do you know where my mum is?” Unfazed, Lillie takes a step forward. She is ready to confront her counterpart without batting an eyelid. “I need to see her.”
Instead of laughing at her, Guzma leans down a little closer. Despite the two heads he towers over us, in these seconds he seems frailer than any human I’ve ever seen before.
“Lillie... That was your name, huh?” He raises his dark brows. “You should turn around and run. Your mum ... is ... out of her fucking mind, to say the least. She’s worse than ever.”
“And yet you followed her to this place,” I add, crossing my arms in front of my chest. The goose bumps are slowly but surely driving me mad.
“Because sometimes, as an adult, you do things for reasons ... that make little sense to you children.” He wrinkles his nose. “Whatever. I followed because I wanted to spend time with her. She knows how to get people on her side...”
“And what’s changed?” Lillie tilts her head.
Guzma, meanwhile, straightens up again. His eyes dart back and forth as if he’s expecting an unpleasant visitor. Then he swallows dryly. “We arrived here and Lusamine ... she was laughing. She seemed happy ... for a moment. The high didn’t last long until she sat in a corner in despair and started talking to herself. At first I thought: 'Hey, give her a treat and catch a few of those Nihilego-things'.” His body trembles. “They’re beasts, I tell you. I thought I’d be able to mess with them, but they crushed Golisopod until I ran out of potions. My partner ... has been knocked flat ever since and no matter how long I look for an exit, I always end up back in the same spot.”
Without asking, Lillie takes off her backpack and pulls out a hyper potion. “I-I hope that’s enough. I can also give you a second or third. All ten of them, if you need them.” She looks at him and Guzma seems unable to comprehend her for a moment. “Every Pokémon deserves help!”
She places the potion in his trembling hand and, while he looks at the plastic canister, he presses his lips together. His larynx quivers as if he’s wrestling with himself and as he lets out a pitiful sigh, puts the potion away and rests his head between his hands, a fresh wave of memories seems to wash over him.
“Lusamine became one with the Nihilego,” he continues. “She wanted to give them love and suddenly ... they were one. But that’s not all ... these creatures change her. They turned Lusamine into someone ... else. Like she’s losing her humanity, more and more with every breath, until there’s nothing left of her.”
“They ... have become one?” The disbelief on Lillie’s face crosses my lips at the same moment. That humans and Pokémon can become one sounds like one of those horror stories where bodies change and the damage can no longer be undone.
“Did you know you can fuse with Pokémon? It’s a bit like returning them to their Poké Ball, except their cells implant themselves in our bodies.” He presses his head tighter between his hands. “Lusamine told me about that. As half Nihilego ... as if she’d always known.”
As I hold my breath, Lillie purses her lips. Brows drawn together, she looks like she’s watching a Pokémon die; and maybe that’s the case. If her mum has bonded with a Nihilego, she can’t possibly be unharmed. If it were otherwise, many people would consider fusing. But the fact there’s never been a word about it anywhere – and I’ve been very attentive to news and newspaper reports lately – doesn’t bode well.
“Where can I find her?” she finally asks again. Her hands clenched into fists, she stares Guzma down. All he can do is surrender.
“This way,” he turns to the path ahead and seems to point to the end, “and you’ll meet her. She likes the clearing. She has ... enough room there.”
I would prefer to make a plan first. Lusamine is strong. She and her Pokémon know how to fight, which means she shouldn’t be underestimated as a Pokémon mixture – probably. But Lillie wastes no time. Guzma’s statement propels her forward. Her hurried steps turn into running and all I can do is follow her and hope my body doesn’t fail.
It’s not far to the aforementioned clearing. The path between the high stone walls is short. The dark ground at our feet is lit up here by a soft glow above us – but I can’t locate the source. There are probably more glowing stones up there than down here. The rock blossoms unfold further than in the narrow crevice, looking like closed artichokes, their flesh shimmering through the outer shell in bright colours. The charm of an underwater world envelops our surroundings like a veil, but shatters into pieces when Lusamine emerges from nowhere, settles on a large stone and touches the light as if she can perceive it otherworldly. At her side, four Nihilegos float around. Creatures through which every drop of brightness glides in a ghostly fashion.
“Mother!” It’s Lillie who shatters the idyllic picture in front of us and directs Lusamine’s gaze in our direction.
“No...” is the first thing that escapes her lips, her green eyes strangely dark. “What are you doing here?” She gets louder. “Can I have absolutely nothing to myself? Do you always have to turn up and ruin everything? How dare you even set foot in this beautiful world created for Nihilego and me?”
“Please ... come home.” Lillie’s soft sound stings even in my chest, but Lusamine doesn’t seem to notice her.
Instead, she stretches her arms out and looks up at the faint glow, as if finding warmth in it. “Everything I want ... everything I asked for ... I have everything I need right here. This world, these Ultra Beasts, they’re mine. They do what you and your brother failed to do. Everything else is nothing more than an annoying triviality. I’m so sick of you. Sick of every one of you!”
Part of me is ready to jump in front of Lillie and guard her as Lusamine’s arms sag. However, instead of continuing to talk to her mum in a gentle voice, Lillie clings to the straps of her backpack.
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“You’re sick of us?” Her legs push her closer to Lusamine. “You know what? I’m the one who’s sick of you, mother! Children are not objects that belong to their parents! Pokémon are not objects a trainer can do whatever they want with!” Her hands detach from the straps to settle on her hips. “I am a living being! Nebby is a living being! Nihilegos are living beings! We’re not objects you can just collect!”
“How can-“
“We weren’t made for you to throw us away when you get bored with us,” Lillie interrupts her mum brashly. “Only the thought makes you cruel, mother!”
A brief click of the tongue escapes Lusamine before she raises her chin. “Cruel? Me? What makes me any different from regular Pokémon Trainers you see out there every day? Trainers like your incompetent little friend here?” She snorts. “What do we do with Pokémon we can’t use because they’re too weak or downright useless? We throw them out of our team.” The corners of her mouth twist briefly. “Whatever. Enough of this nonsense! Get out of here! I’ll never forgive you for stabbing me in the back! I don’t need you here!”
“I saved you from killing a Pokémon!”
“You betrayed me!” Lusamine’s teeth grind so clearly I can hear it. “You were so obedient when you were little. Back then I saw beauty in you, love, warmth ... look what you’ve become. I can only repeat it, but you ... are unbelievably ugly, Lillie!”
“You’re just selfish!” Her hands are shaking and if I didn’t know Lillie better, I would try to comfort her. But I have no place in these seconds – not in a family argument that has been going on for ages.
“You should have stayed in your ugly world.” An exhausted sigh creeps over Lusamine’s lips. “Now, with the power of Nihilego, I will show you what a great fool you have been to follow me!”
A flick is all it takes to lure one Nihilego from the ranks of the others. Its graceful form hovers above Lusamine, then sinks down onto her as she stretches her arms towards it. For a split second, they seem to want exactly the same thing and as a dark storm breaks free from the connection – almost sweeping Lillie and I off our feet – the next thing we see is a figure standing between two worlds.
Pitch-black hair glides through a weightless bubble, with Lusamine’s face in between. Her body seems to be covered in decay up to the waist, her laughter thunders shrilly in my ears and her eyes, piercing yellow, drill through us. She is ready to put an end to all this; to put an end to us.
My hand immediately reaches for my pocket, but stops at the top flap. I don’t want to fight. Yet Lunala’s words and the fact I can’t rely on anyone else in these seconds don’t allow for a second hesitation. So I grab my comrades’ balls and let them out. Against Lusamine, I have to take all the help I can get.
“Lillie!” I hastily turn to the blonde. “I ... can’t promise she’ll get out of there without damage.”
“That’s okay.” With her hands folded at chest height, Lillie keeps a firm eye on her mum. “Whatever happens ... it’s okay.”
“Enough of this worthless chatter!” Lusamine’s voice sounds so distorted, I can barely understand her. It’s only the following scream that hits me.
“Raya, give me your best flamethrower! Ying, Coro, support her!” In the same breath as I give my command, Lusamine raises her four claw-like arms, mindful eyes resting on their inner surfaces.
Her movement causes the ground to tremble, breaking rock off our surroundings, off the rock blossoms and ledges. In the next moment, she hurls hundreds of stones in our direction, causing me to run and catch Lillie by the wrist. We barely make it behind a boulder before she can be impaled. Meanwhile, my team shows some skill. Eevee jumps into a safe hiding place, Trumbeak dodges with gallant wing flaps and Zoroark uses the rocks as a jumping opportunity to get closer to Lusamine.
Her nimble movements bring her to eye level with her opponent, who strikes at her with two claws but fails as flames tear part of her body back. Raya concentrates her flamethrower into small balls, the sparks of which even singe Lusamine’s hair. She can only shake her head, her eyes fixed briefly on Raya in the same instant, as Zoroark gathers dark energy around and sends it in a torrent towards her.
However, the new attacks don’t get a chance to take effect before they roll off like tiresome trivialities and elicit another distorted scream from Lillie’s mother. Immediately afterwards, she knocks Zoroark out of the air, causing Ying to hit the ground with force and kick up dust. Growlithe, meanwhile, narrowly escapes two slabs of rock to crush her between.
“I need a plan...” Lost in thought, I bite my lower lip. “She must have a weak point.”
“Not one you’ll find before you’re all dead.”
It visits me again, the voice of a Pokémon I can’t see anywhere. It fuelled my rage when I went up against Guzma with Raya, and it also sparked the power between me and Mirra I would have otherwise preferred to swallow.
“I’ll find a way,” I murmur softly.
“You can beat her. With my power.”
“I won’t set off Raya’s flames. As much as I don’t care for that woman ... she’s Lillie’s mother. Killing her isn’t my goal.”
“Domino, who are you talking to? Is it my mother’s Nihilego?”
In a flash, my gaze swings in Lillie’s direction. The Nihilegos are silent and I don’t think I should worry her with another stranger in my head. “It’s more like talking to myself.”
“Do you think ... you can do this?”
I don’t know, that would be the most honest answer. Instead, I give her a wry smile. “I’ll do my best. You just stay here!”
Unable to deal with her anymore, I jump out of our hiding place and run towards my Pokémon. Ying is back on her feet. Raya is waiting for the right moment. Trumbeak tries his best echoed voice while dodging Lusamine’s wild blows.
“Your Growlithe wouldn’t have an advantage over that creature anyway,” the voice snorts. “How about a game? I’ll give you exactly what you want. In return, one day I’ll take the light you’re carrying.”
I don’t reply. Maybe it will stop talking to me if I keep quiet. All the while, I try to track Lusamine’s movements. She has four arms, each equipped with an eye, so no attack escapes her. Although she seems clumsy in her defence, she fends off every attack with ease. The four tails she carries around, though, seem harmless. They only provide further vision.
“Coro! Aim for the eyes of her tails. Poke them out if you have to!”
Sounds of approval reach me. Coro chases down to his target like an arrow. Raya tries more pyro balls while Zoroark leaps to my side. My safety remains her priority.
Fire sprays as Lusamine fends off the flames with her arms before releasing a film of acid from her skin and splashing it onto Raya – who gains distance just in time. In the same breath, Coro hits a tail with his beak, but leaves no damage. He can’t even retreat before Lusamine grabs him and smashes him full force against the nearest wall. The stifled cry of pain filters through to me in muffled tones just before Trumbeak goes down and stops moving.
He’s too far away for me to call him back, but Eevee grabs him by the tail feathers and pulls him to safety with all his might. Now I only have two Pokémon left in this battle. The chances of saving Lusamine are dwindling. Still, giving up is out of the question.
“What I want is an attack that separates Nihilego and Lusamine. Something that disrupts that bond and doesn’t hurt Lillie’s mum too much. Not the same thing Mirra went through,” I finally address the voice in my head. It’s been patient – probably because it could see our opponent is too powerful for us.
“Child, the only reason Mimikyu failed was because you used the wrong power. We combined ghost with dark.” Amused snorts course through my senses. “Now we’re combining dark with ghost – a much weaker combination. So go and break off some of the light crystals.”
My only option is obedience. If I want to achieve something, I have to take the leap into the unknown and trust that voice as long as Raya can keep Lusamine at bay. So I rush to the nearest wall and point at the first light stone I see. A well-aimed blow from Ying breaks it into pieces and as I grab a chunk that fits neatly into my fist, the voice overpowers me again.
“Press it to your chest and let your feelings towards this woman flow into the stone.”
“How?”
“You just have to think about your emotions. I create the connection, the change and the deviation.”
“Just like that?”
“Our agreement.”
“And nothing more than that?”
“Creating a suitable Z-Crystal will cost you some of the light of your life energy.” It seems to scratch impatiently in my head. “Nothing you can’t regain through some quiet.”
It will probably cost me strength, of which I have far too little at the moment. I can only hope that Lillie doesn’t end up having to drag me to Lunala.
“Whatever.”
Determined, I press the stone to my chest and watch Lusamine. Raya is doing her best, but exhaustion is slowing her down drastically. We don’t have much time left. Yet I feel that my views towards Lusamine are immature and confused.
When I look at her, I want to hate her, but there is no fire in my heart. If it were otherwise, I wouldn’t be able to help Lillie. Behind that lurks compassion from the story Conia and I were allowed to hear. This woman there has been robbed of one of the most important people in her life. The thought clings heavily to my shoulders, my soul, crushes my chest, but it isn’t enough to want to embrace her.
She did the wrong thing. But we all do at some point.
She made two Pokémon go through hell. But many trainers are just as bad as her.
She rejected Lillie. And I can’t find any justification for it.
Not when I think of Lusamine. But that decision wasn’t hers alone.
Nihilego manipulated her, twisted her, literally infected her with its charms, as if it can mould a mentally unstable person according to its own ideas. It is this tongue on the scales that immunises Lusamine against all logic and all well-intentioned words. I would even argue that it is Nihilego’s fault for clouding her mind. She wanted to find and save her husband. Instead, she throws herself into the abyss.
Thanks to this Pokémon, she pushes Lillie away. It made the circumstances worse, backed us into a corner – led Mirra to this terrible attack.
When I see Lusamine in the middle of this Nihilego – this fusion between two worlds – I realise how much she is being used by this vile creature. I wouldn’t be surprised if Nihilego plans to eat her once she’s completely lost her mind.
My eyelids droop. For a breath, I think I sense a hardness in my heart. Rejection and disgust towards a being I once offered my hand to.
“You do not disappoint me, human girl.”
The rumbling in my skull hurts, so I squint my eyes briefly before opening them a slit wide and looking into my hands. A purple stone rests in them, shapely and sharp-edged. Simultaneously, a drop of blood splashes onto the surface, causing me to touch my nose, trembling. The world blurs before my eyes. My body sways, but I find no haste in my movements. My heart sits quietly in my chest and as Zoroark looks at me, I am aware of her feelings. She harbours the same contempt, the same loathing for the Nihilego as I do.
The newfound Z-Crystal in my hands reacts to our connection, clinging to Ying’s ear as a silver creole earring and connecting to my ring. In these blinks, power engulfs us, a hot stream of dark clouds we surrender to.
“Raya, retreat!”
My command seems long awaited. Despite her battered body, Growlithe throws herself behind the rock to Eevee.
“Ying ... end this tragedy.” With one hand, I point at Lusamine, whose attention slowly slides in our direction. “Never-ending nightmare.”
Ying advances almost in slow motion. The energy releases from her body, the crystal shines. In heavy drops, the dark mass surrounding us splatters to the ground and burns into the rock, spreading out at lightning speed. Darkness swallows the ground, on which Zoroark maintains her stance before raising a paw, pointing at her opponent with a snort.
Hands chase out towards Lusamine on endlessly long arms. The hiss on her lips joins with widened eyes and hasty slashes towards the grim fingers reaching for her. But each attack glides meaninglessly through the ghostly mass. She cannot defend herself as claws dig into her thighs and arms wrap around her upper body – suffocating her. A strangled scream escapes her throat before she is smashed to the ground in one sweeping movement. Stone cracks, a howl escapes Lusamine’s lips and as the darkness floods her entire body, I think I hear her whimpering underneath.
Simultaneously, the black mass piles up, twists and tears open in places, revealing violet light. I only have one breath before it breaks through the cracks in the darkness and erupts in a stormy cloud to all sides. Only Ying, who is standing in front of me, prevents me from being swept off my feet.
Still, the dizziness wraps its claws tightly around my neck, causing me to stagger two steps to the side and bump my good shoulder on the wall to find my footing. Heavy breaths burn in my lungs and my skin is sticky with sweat. The nosebleed drips onto my top in thicker and stronger beads.
I have to blink several times before I can focus on Lusamine again. Her body trembles with every breath. She can barely stay on her feet, let alone float. Blood shimmers on her lips. Sweat glistens on her forehead. Her entire form seems to flicker, unsure of which world to cling to. Finally, Nihilego detaches from her body. Lusamine’s black hair turns back into a light blonde, her eyes gleam a dull green, and only black fingertips remain as a reminder of the fusion. In the next blink of an eye, she collapses.
With faltering steps, I drag myself to the rest of my team, who are still sitting behind the rock. I pat Eevee on the head gratefully. Coro is still out of action, so I can only hug Raya and Ying to thank them for all their efforts. Meanwhile, Lillie runs behind me to her mum and although I don’t want to eavesdrop, she’s far too close.
“Mother... Mum, can you hear me?” She bends down low to Lusamine. “Are you okay?”
It’s incredible how Lillie just pushes all the differences aside and devotes herself to her mum with all her love. She’s by far the kindest girl I’ve ever seen – not that I can remember many acquaintances in my life.
“We managed.” However, I can only lean against Zoroark with a smile. My whole body aches and my new top catches one drop of blood after another.
My head is throbbing. Every fibre in me longs for rest – but we’re still in this dark place and there are two boys in our world waiting for us to come back. At least I hope Amethio is waiting for me.