Jimmy ran out of the liquor store, holding two twelve-packs of beer in his hands. He could hear the shopkeeper behind him, cursing up a blue storm. Jimmy dove through the open passenger door of his car, slid across the seat, and placed the beer behind him, all in one swift move. He gunned the engine and pulled away; the passenger door obediently slammed closed. He laughed openly; damn, he was smooth.

As he got to within two blocks of his apartment, he suddenly found himself surrounded by police cruisers. The cops jumped from their cars and advanced on him with batons. Jimmy smirked; he knew the drill. He held his hands up in the air, fully visible to anyone outside the car. They opened his door and let him exit slowly and deliberately. He stood passively, flaunting an air of arrogance, as the police searched him from top to bottom, finally satisfied he was unarmed. Then, in a flash, they handcuffed him.

“Hey! What’s going on?” Jimmy protested. “You can’t detain me for petty theft! You have to cite and release!”

The police started laughing among themselves. Jimmy’s brow furrowed. “What’s so funny?”

One officer held up a picture to Jimmy. “Is this you, from two days ago?” It showed Jimmy driving back into town. “Sure, what of it?” Then he blanched. “How long has that camera been there?”

The officer pointed to something in the picture. “Don’t you see the sign?” Jimmy squinted. Below the “Welcome To Skeeter” sign was a new one; he hadn’t noticed it before. In the picture, the writing was too small to read. Jimmy scowled. “What of it?”

“Those are the new terms and conditions for living here. Stealing that beer was a violation. You’ve voluntarily given up your permission to live here, and will be expelled immediately.”

Jimmy was aghast. “You can’t do that! I have rights!” Again, the police rolled with laughter. Jimmy smoldered angrily. “What now?”

“You must be thinking of the town of Skeeter. This is the corporation of Skeeter. The local gated-community association bought the town after it defaulted on its debt. The sign you passed explained it all. Guess you should have read it, huh?”

Jimmy steamed. “You can’t do this! I’ll get a lawyer, and beat this rap!” Again, uproarious laughter.

“Just by being here, you waived your right to a jury trial, and agreed to submit to binding arbitration. Of course, we hire the arbitrators, and they only meet here, and you’re not allowed in here, so…”

You could be reading stolen content. Head to the original site for the genuine story.

Jimmy sputtered. “This…this is un-American!”

“The government won’t do anything about this. Skeeter incorporated as a city management firm and a social-media company. These sorts of terms and conditions are extremely common with tech companies. Nothing out of the ordinary at all.”

The officers continued to chuckle. “What about all my stuff?” Jimmy pined weakly.

“Can you honestly say you own any of it? Or was it stolen, like your beer?” Jimmy looked down sullenly. “It’ll be returned to its rightful owners. Anything you actually owned will go towards restitution.”

Jimmy pouted, but could think of nothing. “So, what now?”

The officer grabbed him gently and led him to a squad car. “Now, we escort you out of corporation limits.”

As the squad car pulled away, Jimmy could see the remaining officers making obscene gestures toward him. He slumped in his seat and stared forward vacantly.

He spoke after some time. “How did this all happen?”

The officer looked at Jimmy through the rear-view mirror. “Beg pardon?”

“The takeover. Whatever this crap is.”

The officer snorted. “People like you, that’s how.”

Jimmy sulked. “But nothing like this has happened before. What changed?”

The officer threw back his head as he laughed. “My buddy was in the bar the day it started. He said it was some hotshot law student on break, one of the rich kids in town. The regulars were drowning their sorrows about how bad things have gotten around here. Then he mentions the ‘terms and conditions’ used by tech companies to treat their users any damn way they pleased. One thing leads to another, the beer keeps flowing, and before they knew it, they had a plan! The next day, the town declares bankruptcy, his daddy and his friends buy the place…and the rest is history.”

Jimmy scowled. “Damn rich people,” he muttered.

The officer smirked. “Normally, I’d agree. But it sure makes my job easier.” They neared the town limits; the car began to slow. “That kid’s daddy isn’t stopping there, either. He says this thing is ready to explode nationwide.”

The squad car came to a stop; the officer uncuffed Jimmy and gave him a light shove. “Don’t come back.”

He knelt to look at the sign. The writing was too small to read without a magnifying glass. He wondered if that was legal. Sourly, he realized it was probably authorized by the terms and conditions.

Glumly, Jimmy began walking to the next town. He wondered if there was one.