“I’m glad you’re waking up, Ms. Swift.” A steady voice said as Claire slowly came to.

“Wah? How’d you know…?” Her voice was cracked and as she talked she realized that she was parched, her throat needing all kinds of water.

“EKG and Heart Monitor. Standard procedures, I assure you. In these sorts of situations we simply must keep an eye on all signs of your health and mental state.” As he talked she opened her eyes, looking up into the eyes of a doctor in a white coat. Seeing her open her eyes he leaned over with a cup. “Here, drink some water. You must be parched.”

“Situation?” She asked, taking the cup. She couldn’t help but notice that her hand was cuffed to the bed in a leather cuff. This was no simple hospital. “I wouldn’t call it a situation.”

“You have been in a coma for a week since your attempt on your own life.” The doctor said, “I don’t know what else you might call it, but this is not that simple. We must monitor you.” Her heart rate quickened, and she could hear her heart monitor go along with it. It was easy to see the doctor as well.

“Look.” She said, breathing in and then out. “I didn’t try to jump off a building, or even slit my wrists. I just took a few too many pills.” She said, trying to plead with her own sanity.

“You’re right.” He said simply. “But you must realise, that overdose is one of the simplest forms of suicide, and the most common epidemic among young women like yourself. Still, you have to be kept in a facility.”

Claire sighed. In all honesty it was fair. She hadn’t tried those other ways not because they were more likely to be permanent, but because they were scarier. She was scared of heights, and even her self harm scars were light and fading because she just didn’t have the compulsion to cut deep.

“I will see you again in a few hours. Then on a daily basis until you are released. I hope you recover quickly.” The doctor said, quickly turning around and walking out the door. There was a gap between her and him, it wasn’t that he didn’t care but he acted aloof to her. She wondered why.

“Don’t mind him.” A nurse said, walking over. “He’s a bit of a grumpy pants, but he’s great at heart. He just… doesn’t like getting attached. He’s lost too many patients.”

Claire shrugged. “Thank you, I don’t know why, but I’m invested in all of you around me. I guess maybe it’s how alone you feel, when you’re so close to death.”

“Alone? I suppose everyone has their own experience.” The nurse said. “Here, your father said you might need this.” She handed Claire a book, it was a copy of Edgar Allan Poe’s poems. A little bit ironic of a gift, or perhaps her father’s attempt at a dark joke. In either case, she was happy to see it.

“Thank you.” She said as the nurse smiled and walked away.

“You’ll be eating in a few hours, that’s when the intravenous feeding will run out effectively. We’ll start you on non solid foods.

Claire opened the old book to her favorite poem, Eldorado, which had always given her hope for the future.

Gaily bedight,

A gallant knight,

In sunshine and in shadow,

Had journeyed long,

Singing a song,

In search of Eldorado.

She smiled as she looked at those words, a slight twitch in the corner of her mouth. It was easy enough for her to lose herself reading and re-reading those words.

Stolen novel; please report.

But he grew old—

This knight so bold—

And o’er his heart a shadow—

Fell as he found

No spot of ground

That looked like Eldorado.

When the Nurse came back, Claire mindlessly ate what she was given. It was red jello and beef broth, gross but simple, and she was able to ignore it as she read.

And, as his strength

Failed him at length,

He met a pilgrim shadow—

‘Shadow,’ said he,

‘Where can it be—

This land of Eldorado?’

There was an irony in this choice of poem, as it was written a year before Poe’s death. Claire had done research, trying to get closer to her distant father. While it was commonly heald that he didn’t commit suicide, he had attempted to do so just around when he wrote this poem. An Opiod overdose, a part of her felt like it was poetic…

‘Over the Mountains

Of the Moon,

Down the Valley of the Shadow,

Ride, boldly ride,’

The shade replied,—

‘If you seek for Eldorado!’

Claire sighed as she sat there, when the doctor came back. “I… this is hell.” She said.

“Well, you are not safe to be left alone. Your father has paid for you to be put up in a state of the art facility. You will be transferred tomorrow.”

“Oh. Back in the grippy socks I go, I suppose.” Claire said, her voice croaking from lack of water. The nurse hurried to hand her another cup of water to clear it up.

---

In the morning Claire was ushered out of the hospital and taken to a new facility in a white car. She’d hoped she’d get a yard, one of those fancy type places celebrities did rehab at, but instead she found herself in a warehouse district of Santa Barbra. They pulled her up and took her, arms in their hands.

After three days passed Claire was ushered out of the hospital into a car and taken to the new facility. It was worse than Claire had feared, at least the last place she’d been sent had a yard and other nice things to do. This facility was instead right in the middle of Brooklyn, and in one of the ungentrified areas near DUMBO. She was brought from the car into a large warehouse looking building and taken to the front desk.

The receptionist didn’t look like the normal sort of receptionist that these facilities had, instead looking much younger and less depressed. She had bright pink dyed hair and an undercut. “Hello, can I get the patient’s name please?” Claire watched as her information was transferred from the staff with her to the receptionist. “Alright, right this way.” After a few minutes Claire was taken deeper into the facility and into a room. It was small and there wasn’t anything but a weird looking pod and a chair. “Please, sit, the doctor will be with you shortly.” Claire did as she was instructed and waited for the doctor.

“Hello Ms. Swift.” A man said as he came in. He didn’t look like the psychiatrist type, he was wearing a hoodie and jeans. “Let me cut to the chase. Your new therapy.” He patted the pod thing.

“A Machine? I don’t know what this could be. Are you going to lock me in there? What is this, the twenties? This seems barbaric!” Clair said, trying to get indigent. However, a wave of depression softened her emotions.

“Yes and no. It’s a VR capsule.” THe main paused for a second. “Just a second, I forgot to give you my name. Rodgers, Dr Rodgers. Anyway, you will be placed in the VR capsule and experience the fullness of life while the machine learns about your depressive episodes. When your brain is properly mapped we should be able to help you!”

“Ah. So I’ll be put in what, some kind of video game hospital? This seems so arbitrary, so contrived.”

“Not quite. You are going to be getting early access to Plastikos, a game that is launching soon.”

“How in the world did you swing that?”

“A lot of money… and a sponsorship from the company. We are testing the bounds of their technology, this unit is something they’ve worked on for years, and helping to develop medical applications for the pods. It’s a win win for everyone.”

“I don’t suppose I have a choice, do I?”

“Well, we would prefer you choose to go in under your own volition, but you are currently a ward of your father. He signed the papers already.”

Clair sighed and nodded. “Fine. Put me in. I’ll deal with the consequences.” She laughed a tiny bit. “Can’t be worse than the real world.”