There was much to be done before Karla, Rye, and Sam could ascend the mountain. It wasn’t something you just went and did after half a day of debate; it required proper preparation and a little bit of training. The first half of the training part was already done, the second would take place further up the mountain, as they were planning on acclimating themselves on a basecamp half a day’s walk away. Elia was planning to accompany them at least that far, in case anything or anybody tried to get the jump on them.
Those would-be ascenders were going over logistics outside, while inside, Elia’s students lounged about in a post-marathon stupor. Elia had decided to up her regimen’s difficulty, and that meant anybody who ran too slow would catch a pebble to the face. They had been bruised black and blue before taking a drink.
But yes, back to boon business. The loss of a conjured gauntlet stung, but it had felt right at that moment. Elia wasn’t going to ascend the mountain, and those who did needed every card stacked in their favor.
And now, I have an open slot. And a whole lotta shards.
Shard count: [Common] x235, [Uncommon] x78, [Rare] x19, [Epic] x5
Elia was a bit of a hoarder, but it was paying off. No more thoughts about whether she might need a shard or two to barter for higher ones later, no more needing to always have a dozen rolls backed up in case she got into a death loop. Paranoia was often a burden, but today, it would become a boon to the people that meant the most to her.
And if they didn’t want it, well, she could always toss the kittens a bone.
Rather, a boon.
Elia cackled. She fused the shards and rolled the first of her commons.
You have gained a divine boon: Scissor hands [Common]
“Pretty bad for a start,” she said as her hands turned into scissors. “But I’ve got shards, baby. Keep ‘em rolling, gimme all sixes!”
***
You have gained a divine boon: Always open [Uncommon]
Elia leaned back, inspecting the twenty-sixth boon she had rolled. First the commons, and now the last of the uncommons had gone into the divine gacha machine. None of them were the run-savers she had hoped for. Her disappointment was threatening to spill over.
[Spirit] Always open [Uncommon]
You are impossible to keep out of places. Be it windows, doors, or manholes, no threshold can prevent your passage. You are alarmed to secret passages as well as mundane ones. Some specially warded places require a strong spirit to overcome in this manner. Can not be turned off.
“Does anybody want… the ability to open all doors, anywhere at any time?”
She was met with silence.
“Not all at once,” she mumbled, massaging her brow. Taking in so many boons and then giving them away, either to people, or in sacrifice to the Valti statuette, which doubled as a mini altar, was having a disorienting effect on Elia. It couldn’t be healthy, but everyone had to make their sacrifices. “Come on, you won’t ever need to learn lockpicking. It’s really finicky and takes a long time. No? Alright then, guess I’ll sacrifice it to whoever.”
She was already clasping the figurine when Hannah promptly stood up and closed her hand around it as well. “I’ll take it.”
“Finally.”
They did the whole dance. Hannah looked slightly disoriented after taking in the boon.
A boon has been offered. A sacrifice has been made.
“There,” Elia said, patting her on the back. “I keep on telling Rye it’s better to have all your slots filled out, just in case, but does she ever do anything with her third slot? Nooo, she is happy with the ones she has and besides, she’s waiting for the perfect boon.”
“That seems… not optimal.”
“Exactly! You know what’s up, Hannah, you’re one of the good ones.”
“… But I’m also not going to learn magic because the genius is going on a quest.”
Elia flinched. “We have tomes and scrolls back home. You can work with that, right?”
Hannah sighed. “Yeah. Sure.”
Great. Now I feel bad. Wait, why should I, I just gave her a boon! Actually, since I would have thrown it in the trash anyways, I am not just feeding her my scraps? Gah, this social crap sucks!
“Alright-o!” Elia swung to her feet. “It is time. Who wants to see me roll not one, but two rare boons?”
Everyone perked up at that. They had seen Elia go through common shards like popcorn, and they had always known that uncommon didn’t just exist, but that an uncommon boon was attainable. A rare though? Well, it was in the name, and Elia felt just that little bit smug about being able to roll two.
Once they had all huddled a bit closer, she combined eight shards into a die and threw it.
The world around her went dark, as if focusing solely on her. But, well, she knew the drill, and let the die do its little dance.
It fell on her toe and was moments away from finishing on a blue sign of two intertwined spearheads. Then it fell on a green, as if poked by an invisible hand. When Elia could move again, she was absolutely livid.
You have gained a divine boon: Greater Wind Immunity [Uncommon]
[Body] Greater Wind Immunity [Uncommon] [Empty Socket x3]
You are immovable, by the wind that is. No atmospheric pressure can harm you, no gust can knock you off a ledge. The storm-calling magic of the scale-feathered sky-serpents will find in you its inimical foe, and yet they will find a way to harm you.
Watch out for lightning, and flights of hubris.
“Fucking bullshit.”
“What? What did you get?” Nathan asked.
“A bad roll.” Erik snorted. “It’s a dice, what did you expect?”
“Fucking, shut up. It took me a year to gather these stupid blue shards,” Elia growled and grumbled. There was something particularly ‘fuck you’ about the way the dice had shifted. If she were any less mistrusting, she would have chalked it up to bad luck. But luck had nothing to do with it. The game of life was rigged and when in doubt, the house always came out on top. “The gods hate me. I don’t owe them shit, they owe me! I sacrificed tons of boons, doesn’t that count for something, you pricks?”
She rolled another rare bone dice. It bounced quite traitorously. Out of the million or so sides flickering in green, blue, and purple, it landed on the single rarest color.
You have gained a divine boon: Milk to Cheese [Common]
[Soul] Milk to Cheese [Common]
Milk in a radius around you turns into cheese. Scales with Flow.
“FUCK!”
***
Rye was feeling ‘pumped’ as they said, strung like a bow and ready to be flung off to new horizons.
A few days had passed in training and gauging everyone’s strengths and weaknesses. Rye herself had gone through a few obstacle courses that were murder on her mechanical knees. The team-building exercises were the things she had looked forward to the most. Now, it was time for the group of would-be ascenders to start their hike for real.
Frey was, as it turned out, a knowledgeable character and meticulous sort of planner. They had everything, from extra water bottles to bundles of rope and cold-weather gear. They were climbing the tallest mountain in the world after all, and it would only get colder until they passed the sea of clouds. After that, they’d be closer to the sun and therefore warmer.
It’s a weird kind of logic. Why the sudden shift?
It didn’t matter, only that they had to get there and they had to be reasonably quick. Rye worried, but over the last few hours all her worries had gone up in smoke. She turned in place, until she met the eyes of her favorite person in the whole world. At her beckoning, Sam leaned down, and they kissed, deeply.
“Love you.”
“Love you too, bean,” Sam replied with a dopey smile.
They separated, which was when they noticed their two onlookers. Karla was holding Elia’s hand while Elia was crushing hers.
“H-hey, um, hi,” Elia stuttered. Elia never stuttered. She also didn’t fidget or jump from one foot to the other. “I was just wondering, weren’t you guys planning to leave an hour ago?”
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Rye nodded. “There’s been a slight delay. Some of our rations have spontaneously turned into Gouda.”
Elia quite immediately turned to tears. She turned away of course, but everyone could see she was using Karla’s backpack as a handkerchief.
“Is everything alright?” Sam asked.
Karla shook her head, patting the inconsolable girl on her head. “She gets a lil’ bit emotional after consuming milk-products.”
“I don’t… I’m not crying over that, alright? I’m just a little bit worried. After the thing with Sam I made this whole plan of surprising you with the best of the boons, but now I can’t because… well, what’s done is done.” She pinched the bridge of her nose and breathed out heavily. “Woo, there we go. Think calm, supportive thoughts. I’m a good friend. The best. I’m ok now, I think.”
Rye smiled as a bit of that strength of character returned to her face. That was the Elia she knew, fighting against everyone, even herself. “Hey, it’s alright. If you want to come with us, that can be arranged. Didn’t you want to deliver your complaints to the gods personally?”
“Yeah,” Elia sniffled. “But, well, I’d have to leave these four squirts behind.” She gestured at the assembled students, to much protest on their side. “I’m not letting anyone go through what I had to. And if I did kill a god, I’d do more harm than good, I think. If their shard went missing or flat-out broke, it would be terrible for so, so many people. So yeah, none of that. I might not be able to come with you on your grand adventure, but I’ll follow along until the basecamp, and cheer you on the rest of the way. Go Team Awesome. Wooh!”
“Wooh!” Karla woohed.
There’s something she isn’t telling us. Elia’s wavering, but between what ends?
“And that’s not all. I’ve got some tasty treats for all of you.” She twirled her trusty backpack – a modest, practical thing – and rummaged around in it for a minute before coming up with a set of trinkets. “First, a neat little bracelet for Sam.”
The grey-ish ring she took out was barely adorned, but if she knew Elia, then it was as practical as it was lacking in bling. Sam put it on. It meshed nicely, even adjusting in some minor magical manner around her gauntlet.
Rye thought it was nice. She was totally not scheming on what kind of much better and cooler bracelet she was going to buy for Sam later.
“I shall cherish it like a… if you don’t mind me asking, what does it do?” Sam asked.
“Try flexing your hand.”
She did and a disk of metal plates sprung out of the ether, forming a concentric ring of interlocking plates. It was a round shield, but one that was distinctly magical.
Shrewd lock-plate shield
A bracelet that conjures plates of metal in the form of a flexible shield. Many a castle can easily be taken by a handful of shrewd individuals. It is best if they are not weighed down, or catch an arrow on their ascent.
Consumes a small amount of reservoir to activate. Consumes a great amount of reservoir to repair damage.
“It does take some reservoir to summon and de-summon the metal, but it weighs barely anything. Believe you me, a metal shield is nice until you have to carry it around all day.” Elia commented, already pulling the next item out of her bag. “And next, for Rye, a handy wand and charm combo!”
Rye looked down at the charm, and it was nothing special. Just a cracked opaline rock set in a wooden brooch. The craftsmanship was nice though, the wood carved to resemble a pillow of leaves that complemented her flowy dress.
Pond charm
A handheld charm favored by the smallfolk of the forest. Can hold a moderate amount of reservoir for later use.
Look at you, Elia, you’ve gained a taste for fashion. So… unlike you.
Then she looked at the wand, and a little bit of that notion died again. It was made of stone and shaped like a hand on a stick. The hand was balled into a fist, and the index was stretched out, pointing forward. Rye turned it this way and that. Was this an elaborate prank? No, by the look on Elia’s face –somewhere between mischievously proud, and proudly mischievous – this was really what she thought a good present looked like. She booped it, giving some extra information.
Viln Wand
A stone wand carved in the likeness of a calcified Vili hand. The five fingers represent the hand that crafted their people, but the emblem of a raven remains as a reminder of their true allegiance.
Greatly increases casting speed.
“It’s a bit odd-looking.” Rye swished the pointer-wand back and forth. “But I like the weight to it. Did you add the wristband yourself?”
“It’s Velcro. I thought it would be good tokeep you from losing it and then having to cast with your arm. You can probably use it as a club in a pinch, too” Elia commented with a wry smile.
She put a lot of thought into this. And a lot of souls, likely. Gods, I bet she got a terrible deal, but she’s a good soul at heart.
“This will come in handy. Thanks.”
That compliment alone to make Elia happily bob in place, her previous outburst all but forgotten.
I’m not just going to get her house back. I am going to get her a second house, with a pool and a garage. In case she wants a carriage, or one of those Otto-mobiles.
“And lastly, for Karla, a stick.”
She pulled out a red, perfectly cylindrical rod. Karla looked unusually happy. “Is this what I think it is?”
“A stick?” Rye asked.
“More like a rod actually.”
“And it’s red! I love it I love it I love it!” Karla hugged her girlfriend, casually suplexing her off the ground.
Elia laughed and for a moment, Rye really did believe that she was having fun, that she had come to accept that her part ended right at the start. However, Rye had a feeling that she was up to something. Elia was cunning and pessimistic, and what made that combination so annoying was that very often, she was right to be paranoid. And what more, she did not trust Frey.
Perhaps she would be proven right. Perhaps.
But until then she was looking to be all sunshine and rainbows.
“Alright, all goodies are got, let’s beat this fuckin’ mountain.”
***
To truly ascend the mountain, the first step required them to reach the base camp some five hundred meters up. The only path was an old, abandoned one. It narrowed right where the risk of plummeting to one's death was greatest, and was seldomly wide enough for two people. Once they were at the base camp, that was when the trials would begin.
Rye was already feeling plenty challenged. Oh yes, the mountainside had so many beautiful shelfs of colored stone running through it, and there were so many flowers and bushes that she had never seen before, it was like she had entered another world. They weren’t even up to the snowline yet, and the wind was fresh without stinging against her stone skin.
But everyone was moving fast, and what was an easy jump for them was a difficult hurdle for her.
It’s because of my short legs. I should have asked Kasimir to make me taller.
She flinched as suddenly a massive impact shook the stone right next to her. Her [Threat music] played a jarring tune she had failed to notice, as it was already fading out. When she blinked her eyes open, Brod was rubbing a towel over his goo-covered fist. She looked to her right, where a mixture between a centipede and a moray eel was embedded into the wall, splattered right above the hole it had probably come out of.
It looked just big enough to swallow her head whole.
“Careful,” the giant said. “Acid.”
Rye flicked a fistful of hissing fluid off her face, and he did the same with his fist.
I totally missed that.
“Are you…”
“Ok?” He sniffed, then showed how the skin on his hand healed in seconds. “Giant.”
“Oh.” She turned to Sam, who was trying to hide that she had just been caught out as well.
She wants to be my protector, even though I don’t really need it. But I appreciate the thought. I’ll have to console her later.
She perked her ears and made sure to listen closer to her [Threat music].
Now, where is…
Elia was not where she had expected. She was right at the front, talking animatedly with Frey the giantess. As she picked up her pace, Rye couldn’t help but overhear a few snippets.
“… in the case of a rockslide?”
“We have rockshields, which are like those rainshields of yours, but stronger.”
“Does it work against large, rock-shaped birds?”
“Yes.”
“And what about dragons?”
Dragons!? Should I be worried?
“Dragons won’t be bothering us on our path. They are few, and the young ones are obvious in their passing. We will not cross their paths.”
“So, you’re calculating your odds huh.” The wind picked up, and Rye missed a part of the conversation as she had to focus on her footing. “I sure hope there aren’t any nuts or seeds in these rations. We found out Karla’s allergic a month ago.”
Ah. It’s just Elia being Elia. No need to worry; leave being paranoid to the paranoid.
She sighed, a bit of tension leaving her body.
“No nuts. Hand on my heart.” Frey the giantess made a motion to stop. “We are here. Base camp one.”
Rye peeked around the throng of fellows up front. She didn’t see a lot, and what Elia said next described everything she had to say.
“It’s not much,” Elia said. “A nice flat surface, wind-shielded. Some moth-eaten tents. A fireplace.”
The giantess frowned. Without saying another word, she combed through the abandoned base camp, tearing away tent-covers and kicking over piles of backpacks. The others looked at each other, then followed along like a line of uncertain ducklings.
The frontmost people froze and once more, Rye lamented her short height. She had to squeeze around the half-circle of onlookers. Perhaps if she had been paying some more attention she would have been expecting a body, but up until this point, their trek on this mountain had been devoid of life and unlife alike.
It was a thin body, but it was obviously fresh, only days old. They were once a man, or perhaps a woman, it was hard to tell. Their skull was shattered and roots wound their way out of it like locks of hair. The cavity where the brain was supposed to be was filled with a smattering of wild, colorful flowers.
The corpse was smiling, gaze lost in a happy few last moments.
Someone threw up. Karla covered one of her student’s eyes. Sam had an odd expression about her, one mixed with fear and recognition. Rye squeezed her hand in assurance, then stepped forward.
“Don’t touch them.” The giantess Frey held an arm up, then looked to the toppled bags and backpacks. “This is a Haeggis bloom. Their seeds are easily mistaken for other edible plants. When ingested, the seeds burrow into soft organs, then sprout.”
“That’s… awful,” Rye said.
“Are they mixed in with the other rations?” Elia asked, gesturing to their stocks. “Can’t eat those. You should burn them then.”
Sam shook her head. “That will spread the pollen. It makes you see and feel things. Honestly, the best way to avoid this is to always have an expert herbalist accompany your foragers…”
“But Irena went missing last week in a tar-man raid,” Cesare said. “She was good with plants, and had a boon for it, too.”
“Can we even make the climb without the rations?” Rye asked. “We’re undead, but you didn’t pack them for fun, did you?”
“Of course not,” Frey said. “A lack of food can be deadly even for undead. Once you remember the taste, going without for weeks or a month can turn you insane.”
A bunch of eyes went to Elia.
“Can confirm, it’s terrible for morale.”
The giantess chewed her lip.
“We move to another place further uphill. There we stop, acclimate, and forage. But we move quickly, and make a shelter,” she said, looking up, “before the snow drops.”
Sam nodded. “Winter comes fast in these parts.”
“How fast?” Rye asked.
She followed her girlfriend's gaze upwards at what she had initially thought was a dark cloud stealing the light from above them. At first, her mind couldn’t make sense of it as the world was momentarily encased in darkness. Then, she punched a perfectly Rye-shaped hole in the literal blanket of snow as it smothered the surrounding hills with a deafening soft fwoomph.
“Oh.” Rye said. “That fast.”
“Will this impede our progress?” Sam asked. “Surely, you can’t expect us to ascend with this much snow?”
The giantess shrugged. “It is just snow. It will hide our sound. And we need to move sooner rather than later, and reach the second basecamp before it melts. We stay for a few days, then go.” He turned to Elia, who was frowning at all the discarded gear. “Ah, but for you, I recommend you stay. From here on, the real trials begin. I won’t endanger your pups, and neither will you, yes?”
Elia grumbled as she wiped the snow off her hair. “Fine. But you better keep your promises.”
The giantess nodded. "I have never lied. Not once. And we are staying for a while yet. Who knows, maybe you can find a way to improve our plan for the way up?"
Elia looked out, no doubt smelling trouble and dragons. "Maybe. Just maybe."