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Operation Heathrow
Chapter 45: Ghost Installation

Chapter 45: Ghost Installation

For the next three fortnights, the three aswarans keep terrorizing Kaeshana’s residents by just how brutal they can be when using their repaired rack. Which can no longer be called a rack and pinion since the pinions were replaced by static winches. And gear progressively came to the ghosts as their gear gets finished.

On the day their executioner license expires, Enno and Bryzax come to the executioner’s home, with the ghosts wearing that expensive armor they bought a while ago:

“Gentlemen, your executioner license has expired. Any proceeds from torture, death surcharges and executions will be used to repay your debts first and then to pay for any remaining haunted park costs!” Enno warns his ghosts. “How does it feel to finally wear such expensive plate armor?”

“Finally! We got what we were denied in life! If we are to fight for all eternity as a haunted park boss...” Marzban is interrupted by the lord’s herald.

“You were crafted, you’re not natural ghosts! Natural ghosts might have unfinished business in life, but as aswarans in Upper Perseria, you never did anything other than fight adventurers!” Bryzax retorts.

“Perseria’s city council called us trash, and treated us as such. A little better than the neyze-daran, but...” Marzban gets interrupted once again by human interlocutors.

“Neyze-daran?” a confused Enno asks. “What are they? Some sort of soldier that was seemingly treated as second-class?”

“Ghost light infantry. They are the ones who gave Perserian ghost troops a bad name: they were the ones who used the residents of the city as meat shields in the park!” Ermahgerd answers his overlord. “What I was getting at was that even though you might not be much better than the Perserian city council, at least you understood what value we bring”

“Something’s not right: the city’s residents rebelled against the city council because of its inability to maintain public safety in the wake of the city’s neglect of haunted park maintenance. But wouldn’t some neyze-daran seek support among the living rebels? Or other disgruntled ghost elements of the army? What would the neyze-daran hope to achieve by using the city’s residents as meat shields?” Bryzax asks them, his head spinning.

“Not really, the living rebels called for a total disbanding of the ghost army, while the neyze-daran mutineers only wanted a better treatment of ghost soldiers!” Tissaphernes answers the herald.

“I’m sure better understanding the context of your time in Perserian service is interesting, but we need to go to the Haunted Park Construction Guild. We need to get them through the loot system!”

Once the population realized that the haunted park is a reality, I needed to be cautious about squeezing the population. For now, the items being taxed and tariffed are mostly luxury, sin-based or otherwise related to haunted parks, Enno starts dreading the amount of money it will cost to finish the park’s construction. Having spent six hundred and twelve thousand gold, this sum only paid for a little over three-quarters of the wards and the first boss. How much had the last two bosses cost me?

He starts sweating as the five load all the weapons that will drop from the park, and wearing the templates for the armor people will come to their park to loot. Marzban’s hand and a half sword, which, despite its size, can still be wielded with one hand, as well as his heater shield, Tissaphernes’ long halberd, Ermahgerd’s recurve bow, Seloniel’s axe, Janick’s mace… all of which must be handled with care.

“And even with the repairs, I feel like you fit in much more seamlessly within living society than… neyze-daran would!” Bryzax comments on their ghosts’ socialization.

“These repairs were only aimed at making us different from our original aswaran mold within the confines of a haunted park” Marzban responds.

Once the carpet is laden with the park’s loot, they fly off, once again, to the Haunted Park Construction Guild, carrying an arsenal of weapons so many people who don’t go to haunted parks would only dream of.

Upon arriving at the Guild’s HQ, Enno knocks on the door of the guild’s compound at high noon. Here it seems the person who opens them is, well, Mardonion.

“If it isn’t Enno! What brings you here today?” Mardonion asks him.

“Now that the loot is finalized, we would like to start working on the loot system, as well as finalize the bosses that use the other pieces the aswarans don’t wear” Enno answers.

“Speaking of the loot system, you do realize that each boss has its own chest? So loot systems are cheapest when you are on a bring-your-own-loot pricing”

“Bring-your-own-loot?” Bryzax asks the quartermaster.

“It’s cheaper to install loot chests when you already have the items of what is called a loot table beforehand, rather than having to craft them from scratch”

For example, the Caladon Bog’s operators had us use otherworldly designs for loot, and it cost them more than they would have liked, Mardonion reminisces about his involvement in past haunted parks.

“Please follow me to the guild master’s room. He will tell you what the final bill for the last two bosses and the loot system is”

Joy… I must come up with 282,000 gold just for a park with two bosses and no loot. Yet, the loot is what makes a haunted park worthwhile. I wonder if the Guild accepts financing. If it doesn’t, then I will be forced to borrow for other purposes banks will deem acceptable, and then divert the funds towards the park! Enno starts sweating after Mardonion mentions billing matters.

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So, even though, on previous trips to the guild’s headquarters, they never set foot in the guild master’s inner sanctum, the guild’s master eagerly awaits the lord’s visit.

“I have brought the remaining pieces of loot that will be in my park. I wonder how much will the last two bosses cost, and the loot systems”

“Thank goodness for the loot! While it’s pretty ornate, you didn’t sacrifice practicality, unlike some of the otherworldly designs!” the GM exclaims, with the quartermaster laying down the loot on the floor.

“I guess, my ghosts about to be installed know their weapons... Then again I expect nothing less from aswarans”

“Let’s see: the electricity-stealing dragon, which is now ready for installation...” the GM gets interrupted by the herald.

“Is the electricity-stealing dragon the third boss of the park?” Bryzax asks him.

“Yes, the electricity-stealing dragon is actually the cheapest boss despite its massive size. The liches are the size of, well, you. It proved cheaper to get Janick to appear only after the electricity-stealing dragon’s death than to get a fourth loot chest, but even then, even with the bring-your-own-loot discount, the loot systems are still a quarter of a million gold for three chests”

“Stop speaking in riddles: I want the price of the last two bosses!” Enno feels his blood boiling because of the GM not giving him a complete financial picture yet.

“The electricity-stealing dragon comes in at one hundred nine thousand gold, but Janick already cost us three hundred fourteen thousand gold, and we haven’t finalized the adds’ gear yet” the GM explains to him while he reaches for the rest of the financial records.

So I still have at least 955,000 gold to pay until the park is considered paid off. If I had all the gold earned by my aswarans go towards paying for the haunted park, I will barely dent into the cost of building the park! I repaid their debts, and the population will be relieved that the aswarans will no longer terrorize the city, Enno ponders how he will pay for the haunted park, what he believes is the pride of the realm.

“Mardonion mentioned the background music, along with the liches’ voice acting. How much did it cost?” the lord asks.

“Concetta cost you a thousand gold, as did Seloniel’s voice actress, and the musicians recording the park’s BGM cost three thousand gold!”

“Ugh... Why is it that milord wanted BGM or voice acting?” Bryzax asks him.

To this, he draws a blank. He is left wondering what means he has at his disposal that he didn’t already use. Perhaps taxing the banks... They already charge origination fees, and other fees for issuing bills of exchange and transporting money, not to mention interest. It’s my last fiscal lever left that I could use without infuriating the population any further.

“Music and voice acting was a mere pittance compared to the cost of the ghosts. Speaking of ghosts, where are your three aswarans?” the GM asks the two men, wondering where their ghosts went.

“They are just outside the guild’s premises” Enno answers.

“The time has come for their installation within the park, milord!”

It appears that the trio of aswarans is still outside the guild’s monastery. Still waiting on the gear to be committed to the magical loot chests’ memory, after which point they can be returned to their original owners.

“I’m questioning whether your ghosts really are haunted park ghosts. They feel much more like natural ghosts, which is perhaps why it feels like these repairs are much more limited in scope than you initially hoped for” the GM comments on the three aswarans being a little deranged.

“What do you mean, we aren’t haunted park ghosts? Enno spared us so that we could haunt a park!” Ermahgerd asks.

“Unless, perhaps, the failure of the magical wards of Perseria’s haunted parks resulted in these parks’ ghosts gaining some agency upon exiting the confines of the park they were installed in! And maybe even compromise these ghosts’ subsequent installation in a different park!” He turns to the living. “We’re diving into the unknown here: we shall see how the installation turns out”

After the gear these ghosts commissioned has been committed to the memory of the magical chests about to be installed in the haunted park, they ride the carpet, with the GM riding another carpet along with the team tasked with installing the bosses.

When they arrive at the quarry where the bosses are to be installed, for some reason, there seems to be a handful of other ghosts. They bear no apparent relationship with the other three bosses, but appear to wear lamellar armor of Perserian origin, along with a recurve bow, an oval pavise and either a spear or a shamshir. And triangular beards.

“Before you go out and be installed as a boss of this haunted park, we would love to see you one last time. In life, we fought the Perserian rebels in the upper city” the kamandaran ghost starts weeping as the three aswarans take out their phantom horses from what they call their horse pockets.

“Quiet! This is not how anusiya should behave! We daylami suffered heavy losses as rebels stormed the upper city through the sewers!” a daylami soldier, wielding a shamshir, then turns to the aswarans. “Where were you when the gyan-avspar were getting killed?”

“Traitors! You betrayed your Perserian heritage by becoming haunted park bosses in Kaeshanian service!” the second daylami, wielding a xyston, throws shade at the bosses.

“At least Kaeshana allowed us to do whatever we wanted to prisoners, and get whatever gear we desired!” Tissaphernes retorts to the ghost footmen.

“You fancy yourselves pushtigban, but your behavior is unworthy of such! You’re no better than ordinary kamandaran, paighan or neyze-daran!” the pikeman daylami taunts the three aswarans.

“What are these ghosts doing here? As far as I can make out, these ghosts seem to be calling names among each other based on soldier types, but I don’t understand anything beyond aswarans being heavy cavalry and neyze-daran being light infantry!” Bryzax laments.

Between kamandaran, anusiya, daylami, gyan-avspar, paighan and pushtigban, I can’t make heads of anything! Enno’s head is spinning as the three aswarans ride their ghost warhorses into position, where they will be expected to haunt the quarry, and fight parties for all eternity. Or at least until the haunted park closes.

When their loci are in position in the room where the three aswarans will be, the crews draw magical lines on the ground, marking the limits of what the so-called rooms will be. Beyond which the boss can’t get out once operational as a boss. Barring malfunctions of the magical wards of course.

Once the ghost-proofing invisible walls are built, then can the loci of the bosses, and, if applicable, be placed onto the ground where they will appear at the start of the fight.

In the end, the three aswarans look majestic in all that finery they outfitted their warhorses with, along with themselves, and their gear.

“Farewell, aswarans. May your lives as a haunted park boss prove better than your life among the living!” Enno prays for the three ghosts who tormented the population of Kaeshana until now.

“I guess, we gave our best Parthian shots!” the kamandaran deadpans the living, before vanishing.