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Operation Heathrow
Chapter 39: Gear Shopping

Chapter 39: Gear Shopping

After his breakfast, Enno goes back to the jail annex. But without Saronium, whom he knows she doesn’t have a clue about what he’s about to ask them. He goes to the kitchen...

“Concetta, I would like to take some of the practice residue from alcohol magic drills please...” Enno pleads with his cook.

“Milord, I am not sure what the hell you think you’re doing with it!” Concetta retorts a little confused.

“I think these ghosts might want to drink; they would be thirsty by now... I might even distribute it to the other prisoners!”

The lord then takes a jug of magical alcohol for use on the aswarans, or at least so that he can coax them into answering some questions about magical wards and ghost crafters, as well as the cost of these items. Upon arriving at the aswarans’ cell:

“Perhaps you could drink the magical drinks I have brought” the lord tells the captive ghosts.

“I suspect that you have some questions for which the living have no answers!” Marzban babbles in a creepy tone.

“I don’t think I have any real idea of who even builds magical wards, nor how much they cost!” Enno screams at the aswarans. Much less about who crafts ghost loci and loot systems, and at what cost!”

“We might tell you if you give us more than just magic drinks!” Tissaphernes yells at his captor.

“You do understand that your other demands are very expensive and that no bank will lend money for building a haunted park! Are you trying to bankrupt the dominion, or its residents?” Enno’s face turns red while facing the phantom prisoners.

“What do you mean, milord?” Marzban yells at his captor.

“We were already forced to levy taxes on funeral goods and services, repairs of high-end gear and to impose tariffs on imported magical alcohol just to pay for the haunted park! A park that’s only in its early stages of construction!” Enno retorts.

“Perseria thought building two dungeons in its walls would be a good investment; look where it led them!” Ermahgerd keeps yelling.

“Without us, there won’t be a park!” Marzban swiftly reminds him.

“Maybe we can have you equipped with only one weapon apiece, rather than all three as you were in Perserian service. Who wields which weapon depends on what each of you is best at!” Enno makes a first compromise, which he knows will only leave a small dent in the costs. “If any of you is proficient with a saber, I might give one of you a dha if that’s acceptable”

“How is a dha different from the shamshir I used to wield?” Ermahgerd asks his captor.

“Ermahgerd! You’re clearly the best archer among us, why do you ask about sabers?” Marzban scolds his subordinate.

“Because maybe someone here might prefer using sabers to bows or xystons?” Ermahgerd asks his fellow aswarans.

“A dha differs from a shamshir by the shape and size of its guard!” the lord explains to the aswaran prisoners.

Damn, if I thought giving away the dha Bryzax won to these ghosts was a viable cost-saving measure, I am gravely mistaken, Enno realizes that the dha is not to their tastes, judging by their reaction to the offer.

“You want to get through the three stages of construction, our gear needs to meet our specs!” Tissaphernes retorts to Enno.

“Yeah, the guard of a dha is poorly designed and will get us maimed, if not killed!” Marzban starts formulating the specs for his sword.

Hehe: with new gear made according to these specs, we can leave our past in Perseria behind! Marzban starts thinking while the trio starts talking about what they want in more detail out of their gear, beyond tassels for his warhorse’s caparison and lacquer and trim for their armor. Full plate for all 3.

“Let’s back up a bit. Three stages of construction? What role did any of you play during the construction of Perseria’s haunted parks?” Enno asks about their past.

“We were responsible for the security around the city hall’s main plaza while the Giant Garuda was being installed, along with its loot chest system!” Marzban answers his captor.

Bosses are installed? They make me feel like it’s unwise to install bosses before the wards are up! Enno starts sweating, realizing that they need to get started immediately if they want to get the gear ready by installation time.

“Our involvement with the Perserian haunted parks began in the late stages of the construction of the magical wards, the first stage” Tissaphernes adds to his leader’s statements.

“Quiet, Tissaphernes!” Marzban then turns to Enno. “We might be ok with a plain croupiere, since the caparison will cover it in full, but there’s one guild building everything that makes a haunted park, well, a haunted park! They take care of installing wards, then ghosts and finally the loot systems!”

“Before you take me to the guild, I wonder why you insist so much on your gear looking as expensive as possible! Because you, as haunted park bosses, remain fixed in place and, by and large, haunted park users only care about the fights and the loot they yield…” Enno struggles to understand why.

“You put the finger on the reason! If we are going to become haunted park bosses, we may as well wear some of the possible loot ourselves!” Ermahgerd answers the would-be haunted park owner.

Sometimes I feel like I’m dealing with oversized egos, Enno’s head starts spinning, given the list of requirements for the gear. Tissaphernes wants a spear built around a 10-foot wooden pole, with specific primary and secondary spearheads, Ermahgerd wants specific ornaments on the bow limbs, as well as a certain draw strength… He starts feeling like they will need to have Bryzax and Yutolio tour the city alongside them.

“Because meeting all their requirements will mean the lead time is rather long, Bryzax, I feel like we need to escort the ghosts to various artisans in the city. They’re combat veterans though, and typically more experienced soldiers tend to have more refined tastes in gear. However, be warned: as future bosses of the haunted park, they are going to be equipped almost from scratch, except for the reins, saddle and spurs. Yutolio, take Tissaphernes in a tour of the city, Bryzax, you take Ermahgerd”

“Why, milord, do you have us babysit ghosts while they are out shopping?” Yutolio asks his liege lord, furrowing a brow.

“We can’t leave ghosts unattended, lest they vandalize the town! And one separate armorer for the horse as well as another one for the wearer!” Enno then goes to an armorer.

Joy… I really wonder what went through their minds, while the armorer takes a draft of what Marzban’s suit of armor will look like, Enno is left wondering about the cost of that suit of armor. For some reason the armorer doesn’t seem fazed by Marzban’s ghostly aspect.

Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.

Once Marzban is done telling him about the motif and lacquer pattern, alongside the plume, Enno is about to hear the true cost of this ghost’s suit of armor.

“How much for the armor?” Enno asks for the price.

“That will run thirty-five thousand gold” the armorer gives him the quote.

“For that price, it better be fit for a wuzurgan or else!” Marzban shouts, leaving the armorer without a clue of what a wuzurgan is, other than maybe being a name for some high position. And yet he keeps begging the armorer. “But I MUST have that suit of armor!”

I guess, I have no choice but to accept that outfitting 3 knights in full doesn’t even start to cover the baseline cost of getting the park built! And Marzban claimed that, for 35k gold, he could get a suit of plate fit for what he called a wuzurgan? What the hell are wuzurgans in Perserian society? If, like aswaran, wuzurgan was a Perserian term, of course… Enno sighs before he asks about the payment schedule.

“How much of it must be paid when?” Enno asks, believing that knowing what a wuzurgan is may well be secondary for the time being.

“Twenty percent now, the rest at completion! And that will be done in two to three fortnights!” the armorer tells him.

Enno turns to the ghost. “Is it realistic to get magical wards built around a quarry in two to three fortnights? No other structural work required!”

“I can’t say, really! But, if it takes that long to get the armor the way I want it, I accept the park won’t be completed in three fortnights! I know the life of a haunted park boss is harsh” Marzban answers his captor.

And not the least because you can’t build a loot system if your loot isn’t ready, Marzban reflects on what the lead time for the loot means for him. And for the park.

“I believe the population will accept the construction of the park will take a while, so long as there is actual work being made towards it!” Enno tells the ghost, before Ermahgerd arrives at that armorer.

“Sir, since we ride three identical ghost war horses, is it possible to just have all the peytrals with the same yellow tassels? And really, three identical bardings?” Ermahgerd asks his leader.

“Just let me lacquer my horse’s shaffron and crinet! The caparison will cover the rest, except for the front of the peytral!” Marzban instructs his subordinate about the barding.

“How much will we save by doing so? Also, how long will it take to make the three bardings?” Enno asks the second ghost about the timeframe.

“About three to four fortnights. The horse armorer offered to make three bardings for the cost of two. And that comes out to thirty thousand apiece!”

Damn, these aswarans really are spendthrifts of the worst kind! But they know that building a haunted park isn’t quick. They spend a fortune on horse armor even though their horses won’t be lootable! Bryzax overhears the aswaran in his care talk about the cost of horse armor.

“This grivpanvar accepted but you need to accept before this offer goes in effect!” Ermahgerd insists on Marzban accepting the horse armorer’s offer, knowing Tissaphernes accepted it.

“Wait a minute, what’s a grivpanvar? What’s a wuzurgan? I have the feeling that I will hear these terms until your installation!” Enno asks the lead aswaran.

“I’ll tell you once we have finished commissioning all the gear we need!” Marzban then turns to his subordinates. “Ermahgerd, get to the bowyer, Tissaphernes, go get what passes for a xyston here! And then I will have the same barding as you do, yellow tassels and all!”

“Enough! If you want this kind of gear, borrow the money for it at the bank!” Enno’s face turns red, ulcerated by the expenses these ghosts are making. “I will not let you spend any money from Kaeshana’s treasury for that!”

“On my honor as a Kaeshanian grivpanvar, I will borrow all the required gold to outfit all three of us by any means necessary!” Tissaphernes swears by the gear he plans on putting as collateral.

In old Perserian society, combat skill alone wasn’t enough to make it to the most elite units. Back there, expensive gear was a marker of eliteness. This was a rude awakening to the realities of Kaeshanian society, where people didn’t set expectations in battle based, even partially, on the apparent cost of one’s gear, Ermahgerd reflects on this whole experience of shopping among the living.

“Sorry, Mister Grivpanvar, but no bank will lend money to a ghost! You will need a living co-signer to even take out a loan!” Yutolio warns Tissaphernes, who instead scours the city in search of a living co-signer to take out the loan for the sum he believes is necessary to equip all three ghosts for haunted park duty.

“I can’t believe Tissaphernes: on the one hand, he’s willing to cut a deal to get us horse barding for cheaper. On the other hand, he mortgaged us to the hilt!” Ermahgerd tries to prevent his fellow aswaran from terrorizing the city, and chases him around.

Who, other than a beggar, would co-sign to get a loan for someone they don’t know? Yutolio is left puzzled by the ghosts’ actions and their despair to get their hands on that sort of high-end gear.

“I guess, I need to get the weapons for my fellow aswarans because they are so busy elsewhere in the city!” Marzban sighs as he’s taken to the nearest weaponsmith by his captor.

But because the weaponsmith didn’t deal in bows, Marzban only deals with Tissaphernes’ polearm, as befits a grivpanvar, and his own sword. Speaking of which, both weapons are to have ornamentations and engravings at various places: the halberd’s head and the fuller for the polearm and the sword respectively. And these two weapons could be obtained for a fraction of the price of even one suit of plate armor.

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Meanwhile, Tissaphernes backs a beggar into a corner, with the ghost being increasingly insistent towards the beggar:

“I need your help! Now!” Tissaphernes yells at the beggar in a creepy tone, while he has yet to explain what he wants of the beggar.

“What can I possibly be of use to you for?” the beggar asks the aswaran about what purpose the ghost has for him.

“I need someone to sign a bank loan for me! I can’t legally sign a loan on my own!”

“What can a ghost possibly want to borrow money for?”

“That is not for you to know! All you need to know is that I need someone to sign the loan, and I might even give you some gold for that favor!”

“What happens if I don’t?” the beggar asks, unsure of whether he should do it.

“You will die in the streets!” Tissaphernes screams in a creepy voice.

“Anything to get me out of the streets! I can’t even afford to go on an apprenticeship!” the beggar trembles, hoping to get by on the scraps of this loan.

What the beggar doesn’t realize is that, by being a co-signer on the loan for our gear is really a poisoned gift, Tissaphernes starts thinking about how much cash to give him out of the loan money because he feels that, for all the torment he might have inflicted on the beggar, at least he should follow through on his promise to the beggar. And give the beggar enough money to rent a room somewhere in the city, as well as enough money to buy a basic set of tools for the trade of his choice, along with the apprenticeship fee.

As the trembling beggar goes to the Bank of the Frontier’s Kaeshana branch, he starts dashing towards the bank branch when he feels like Ermahgerd is hot on his tail. Who doesn’t look very happy to see the trio’s grivpanvar get to the bank with a beggar in tow.

“What is the meaning of this? You dragged this beggar to the bank? Kicking and screaming?” Ermahgerd scolds the grivpanvar.

“His Lordship suddenly decided that he won’t spend any of his money on getting him our gear! How are we going to pay for it?” Tissaphernes raises his voice.

“What?” the archer aswaran can’t hide his surprise at Enno’s actions. “I thought he was a money-pincher, but not to that extent!”

The beggar then flees from the feud between the two aswarans. “Look at what you did to the beggar!” the grivpanvar points to the fleeing beggar. “We can’t simply steal the gear from these artisans three fortnights from now! And you ruined that beggar’s life!”

The quarrel degenerates. “What did you plan to do with him anyway?”

“I could have used some money from the loan to jumpstart his way out of the streets!”

In the meantime, the pair realize this was not going to work, at least not for the time being. The pair feel like they have no choice but to go in and maybe frighten the bankers into lending them money without a living co-signer.

“The ghosts! Run!” a banker shouts at his other employees, hiding and trembling under furniture, while he looks at the two ghosts getting to the teller window.

“We only want to borrow money! We had unfinished business in life, and we need to borrow money to complete it!” Tissaphernes states them in a creepy voice.

“How much money are you… talking?” a trembling banker asks the would-be lender. “What are you putting as collateral?”

“I would like to borrow a quarter of a million gold, so we can commission new gear that we’re putting as collateral!” the creepiness of the voice makes the bankers uncomfortable.

The banker hands over a standard form indenture contract for the loan they’re about to take out from the Bank of the Frontier, and the ghosts sigh when the banker’s fear gets the better of him. They borrow at a 10% yearly rate.

Even when Marzban commissions three caparisons for a few thousand gold, and, with the gold in hand, they proceed to pay everyone they commissioned weapons from, with some gold left over to commission a bow for Ermahgerd and a shield for Marzban to go with his sword.