“Goblins!” Yelled a drunk Ghimli slamming his empty cup on the table.
“Fine…” Amanda said, letting the Kobold contract to the side.
“So Goblins it is. We should take a rest until the morning. This doesn’t look far from the city.” I said, letting my first and only cup of ale rest on the table and getting up to pay our bill.
The waitress was bent over the counter flirting with the bartender, she perked up when she saw me and started fiddling with her tail.
“Hey, sweety, what can I do for you?” She asked touching my arm.
“I just want to close our tab, please.” I tried to ignore her advances.
“Oh, come on, there’s so much meat for you, why close so soon? Or…” She leaned close and her breast touched my chest while she whispered in my ears “do you want to go to bed?”
I felt the shivers down my spine and I could feel Amanda’s eyes on the back of my head. “Just the tab, please.”
“Your loss, honey.” she winked.
We found our room shortly after, it was a simple bunk room with a couple of two-story beds for each of us, between the beds there was a bucket of water and an empty bucket, the smell on the empty bucket was really strong and pungent and almost made Bea gag when she looked close.
“If any of you dares to use this bucket in the middle of the night, you’re dead! You hear me?” Bea said pointing at the bucket with a dagger and at us with another.
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Ghimli
Sleep didn’t come to me easily, I shuffled in my bed trying to get used to my new size and with my feet dangling out of the frame. Doc was kind enough to let me use the top bunk, so my feet didn’t touch the ground, but every move that Doc made, it was a kick on the shin.
When I finally was able to catch a wink, I felt my soul being sucked into another realm. I found myself in the center of a stone room with multiple statues around me, and a strong spotlight on me. My vision took a bit to long to get used to the brightness and I could see that some statues had the same spotlight on them. I leapt from my platform to inspect them closely.
The first one I saw was right in front of me, it was a 20-something-year-old man with metal shoulder pads and a helm held under his arm, at his feet it was a plaque.
Yondor - God of War and Justice
The sculpture was amazing, the details of the veins on his neck, and the scars all through his torso were pure perfection. It looked like Yondor was frozen in time and presented in front of me. At his side, there was another statue, the face looked the same, but the scars were on different spots. "Twins…" I thought, and the name on his feet confirmed it.
Vongor - God of War and Lies
A few statues down there was another spotlight shining at an older woman, her face was soft and the wrinkles gave her a kind expression. She wore a simple robe with some kind of detailed embroidery at every seam. I read her name.
Orghana - Goddess of Knowledge
I bowed gently and followed for the next lighted statue.
Gridor - God of Battles
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A tall man in his prime 30’s held a joyful expression on his face with a large smile, the eyes showing the glee and satisfaction of the fight. His leather armor was torn in some places, showing that this specific representation was made right after a battle and the skull pressed under his feet confirmed my hypotheses.
At the size of my own torso, the skull was missing defined features, I couldn’t see what kind of creature was that, but it was twice the size of Gridor’s upper body. I felt a link when my face made the same expression on the statue’s face, but there was one last statue to see.
A middle-aged man was sitting on a large chair, holding a pipe at his mouth and a book in the other hand, a chain drooped at his neck holding a ring. I felt that I’ve already seen this figure, but I couldn’t put my finger on it, until I’ve read the plaque underneath.
Tolkeen - God of Language and Arcana
“I Believe that this is too much for Fan Service… They transformed Tolkien into a deity?” I shook my head in disappointment.
I mean, I love the guy, If I knew how to write back when the movies came out, I probably wouldn’t put an ‘h’ on my name and be just like the dwarf, and it was too late when I read the books, the spelling had already caught on.
I made my way back to Grindor, looked straight into his face and smiled back at him, his eyes shifted to look at me, the smile broadened and the layer of stone flecking at his feet.
“Finally, a warrior worthy of my blessing!” his voice thundered over the room, and one by one the spotlight faded, except from Tolkeen and Orghana. “Tell me, noble adventurer, what is your name?”
“An…Andre.”
“Andre. Why thou chose thus name? It’s not the name that shows me. Do you want to fool a God?” He sounded more annoyed than angry.
“Not at all!” I defended myself. “My name is Andre, my real name, I mean. But everyone calls me Ghimli”
“Now the name matches the face. Tell me, Ghimli, do you have any relationship with Tolkeen? I recall that this is close to one of his son’s name.”
“No, Sir. He’s a known person in my universe, he wrote these books and I took my favorite character as a nickname.”
“Fair enough. It’s a common tradition across all universes to name their sons in homage to gods. So, Ghimli, may I stop with formalities?”
“I…I guess?”
“Fucking Finally! Do you know how much brain strength I need to speak like that? I’m a fighter, not a writer. If you want someone to talk all fancy, you should pick Tolkeen.” Grindor said sitting cross-legged and kicking the skull to roll into the ground. “So, how do you want to be called?”
“The way you like, your holiness.”
"Holiness is the whore that… I’ll let this one slide, you’re new at this and it’s the first time we met. I’ll call you Andre, it’ll be confusing referring you as Ghimli when speaking with Tolkeen
“Let me introduce myself formally, I am called Grindor, I ascended to godhood due to my prowess in battle and achieving the highest level a mortal could reach. Do you have any questions? I always found it easier to answer questions than trying to explain all.”
“Some, Grindor…” I scratched my head. “For start, what do I need to do now that you’re my… Patron? God? Patronus?”
“Fight.” He answered with a large grin. “My domain is battle, and I saw the fire of battle inside your soul, that’s why I applied to be your patron. It’s rare to see outsiders inside the Pantheon, and one with this much fire… Usually our followers are born into faith, and having the opportunity to see your desires, past and futures, is rare.”
“Fight… That’s something I can do. And what kind of powers came with our… patronage?”
“At first, the basic Cleric spells. Cure wounds, Bless… Every battlefield needs a healer and, different from the snake oil sellers, you can actually heal. My main focus is battle magic, but I can pull some strings and grant you something outside my range. Just don’t make it a habit because, if this were your path, you would have chosen that deity.”
“Gotcha. And, this kind of talk, is it common?”
“Very. You just need the materials and do a ritual to commune with me. It’s hard to pull off at the start, but give some time and it’ll come naturally.” The light around the room started to fade, closing in on where we were sitting. “That’s our time, Andre. I’m glad to be your patron, now, back to the formalities.”
He stood his hand in my direction and I clasped in a handshake. I felt a burn on the back of my hand, it wasn’t pain, but something similar to a tattoo.
A symbol of a boar head appeared in the back of my hand, the eye that was visible was closed and what looked like a scar crossing all around that side of its face.
“This is my symbol” Grindor spoke, while fading. “It represents the resilience of a wild boar and the joy of a good battle, and, most of all, being victorious!”
I woke up in my bed right after Grindor’s last words, the itch on my hand still lingering, like a fresh scab, and the symbol was less visible on my dark green skin. I reached for the ceiling looking at the back of my hand, admiring the details of the new tattoo.
“Why are you grinning like an idiot over there, Andre?” Bea asked me, washing her face on the bucket.
“Nothing” I answered. “Just felt a divine touch.”