I closed my eyes. It was time to enact plan: 'Pretend You're Not There', or 'PYNT' for short.

The rustle of weapons rang out, and someone spoke. "Hey! Who the fuck are you?"

Trying to trick me I see, but too bad, I won't fall for it. Because I'm not here. Act like air, think like air, be air. Air can't answer so neither can I.

Someone whispered. "Is he dead?"

To which someone responded. "How the hell should I know."

The person who I assume was Derrick, raised his voice. "Last chance. Get up now or die where you lay."

Nice try, Derrick, but you can't catch this old fox. I know all your tricks, and I won't fall for them.

I heard Derrick whispering "Hey, Ian. Go check if he's breathing."

"No way, go check yourself."

"Go check or you'll be standing watch for an entire week."

"Fine, fine! Just back me up if something happens."

I could hear Ian closing in on nothing, because I am nothing, and nothing is there, therfore nothing is nowhere.

His shuffling feet got closer and closer.

I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here, go away. I'm not here, go away. I'm not here, go away! Okay, fine, I'm here.

It seemed like Ian was about to speak, but got startled by my cheetah like reflexes. I sprang up and sprinted away, causing him to fall on his butt.

'Don't think, and just run' I thought to myself, which made me think even harder. I ran in a zig zag pattern, to make sure I didn't get any boo boos on my leg again.

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I could hear them running behind me, way further back this time. Seems like they got a real scare when nothing became something, and it ran away.

As I ran along, I could finally see the light at the end of the tunnel. Or rather the cave, and there was no light, because it was dark.

W-what is this feeling? Is this what they call hope? A hope for a new and better tomorrow? The hope of a new dawn?

As hope filled my entire being, I felt something fly straight by my ear. Cold sweat drenched my back. That was an arrow wasn't it?

Focus! Keep your head in the game, or rather, keep your head down.

Derrick yelling made me look backwards. "Sherman stop him! Sherman!"

As I turned my head forwards, I could see a man blocking the exit with a big sword. Then I could see my own body from high above, as it ran along for another 2 steps before falling limp to the ground, headless.

"Huh? What the fuck?" As I came to, that was the first thing I heard. I found myself lying on the cold hard ground in what seemed to be a dimly lit cave.

I muttered with tears pouring down my face. "Sherman, you fucking asshole."

After that, I lost count of how many times I died. It didn't even hurt that much anymore. After getting beheaded, mutilated, and beaten to death a couple of times, it just becomes a part of your life, or death in this case. Like eating breakfast, or brushing your teeth.

I even ended up learning the names of the the last two men, they are named Bran and Jordy. I don't know much about them, they don't talk much. Honestly, I wouldn't be surpised if they were named henchman #1, and henchman #2.

I feel like I've really gotten to know the rest of the boys. We have Derrick, the piece of shit, who seems to be the top dog. Elric the beheader, who likes to chop my head off. Sherman, the guardian, destroyer of hope. Ian, the wuss, who's real fun to spook. He's also pretty good with a bow. And last but not least, Niles, the nice one.

Niles is a real good guy. He always makes it quick and painless, and tells me comforting words before ending my life. I'm pretty sure we could have been friends in another situation. We could have gone fishing or something.

Like I said, I've tried most of the things I could think of to escape my current predicament, and none have worked very well so far. The time I pretended to be a mind reader, and told them their names, and what they would say next, was a fun one. It gave them a real shock.

In the end, all I'm left with is my final option. It's really simple actually.

Murder.

I just have to kill them all.

I've never killed anyone before. The closest I've gotten is when I pushed someone down the stairs. It was an accident, I swear. Hitting them with something sharp should do the trick. It works fine on me after all.

Anyway, let's get this show on the road. I spoke to the man who was currently hoisting a sword above his head, standing over me. "Okay, Elric, I'm ready. Let 'er rip!"