"Recording in three, two, one," Gray said,
"What is up everyone!" Sam said, waving at the camera, "I just opened up my very own charity and I just wanted to tell you all about it."
"We at Sam philantropy will be helping people in need all over the world," Sam said, "starting here with the people of Los Angeles!"
"I enjoy doing good deeds," Sam continued, "which is why 100% of the proceeds of this channel will go to charity. So smash that like button, subscribe, and donate to help those in need! To sweeten the deal, I will be picking 100 lucky subscribers to recieve a signed t-shirt!"
"So let's get started! I want to show you all the good we can do together!" Sam said, with a beaming smile.
"Okay cut, that's all for now" Sam said, his smile fading "stop recording."
Gray turned off the camera, and gave Sam a look. "Green, what are you doing?"
"What do you mean?" Sam asked, "A YouTube channel is a great way to raise awareness and funds."
"People are going to think you're a scam artist," Gray said, "You can't just start a charity out of nowhere and expect people to trust you."
"Jeez, Gray. It worked for Mr. Beast," Sam said, "I'm sure it'll work for me. Plus, you said I needed followers, right? This is a great way to do that."
"Well, I guess you're not wrong," Gray said, "But you need to be careful. All sorts of internet crazies are going to be watching you, and if you mess up, they'll turn on you in an instant."
"I'll be fine, I'll be careful enough to not have any scandals," Sam said, "I won't be like those other YouTubers who hire sex offenders or scam their fans with crypto."
"Well, we could always call the Empire's PR department," Gray said, "They could help you with your image should things go south."
"PR department?" Sam asked, "What do they do?"
"They tend to be a bit... aggressive," Gray said, "But they get the job done. They can spin any story in your favor, no matter how bad it is. You could stand in the middle of Main Street and shoot somebody, and you wouldn't lose a single subscriber."
"My god," Sam said, "That's... that's terrifying."
"Sorry, that was hyperbole," Gray said, "nobody in reality would be so gullible, people are smarter than that."
"Oh" Sam said, "What a relief. I was worried for a second there."
"Anyway, I don't think a YouTube channel is really necessary," Gray said, "We can just go out and help people the old-fashioned way. You know, face-to-face, using our powers."
"I don't know," Sam said, "I don't really want to abuse god powers like that. That's a recipe for trouble. What if the government finds out? I wouldn't be able to live here peacefully anymore."
"So you think it's better to broadcast yourself on YouTube?" Gray asked,
"Well, yeah," Sam said, "I mean, nobody believes the stuff on the internet anyway. Everyone will think any magic we do is special effects or AI. So it's safe."
Gray sighed, "Fine, but remember, you're a god now. You'll eventually have to face the music. The people of this world are going to find out about you sooner or later."
"I know, I know," Sam said, "But for now, let's just have some low-key fun."
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Sam and Gray were walking down the street to their next filming location, when they heard a voice calling out to them.
"Young man, can you help me get something to eat?" a lady asked. "Anything will do"
Sam turned to see a lady sitting on the sidewalk, holding a sign that read "Lost my job, need help. God bless." She looked to be in her fifties, with greying hair and a tired expression.
"What do you think, Sam?" Gray asked, "Should we help her?"
The author's tale has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.
"Well, we are on a mission to help people," Sam said, "So why not?"
Handing the lady a twenty dollar bill, Sam said, "Here you go, get yourself something to eat."
"Thank you, what's your name?" the lady asked.
"I'm Sam, and this is Gray," Sam said, "We're gods, and we're here to help."
"Haha, well, bless you both," the lady said, "I'll be sure to pay it forward."
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"Recording in three, two, one," Gray said,
"Toda-" Sam started, before being interrupted by a loud crash.
"What was that?" Gray asked, looking around.
Sam turned to see a car had crashed into a nearby building, sending debris flying everywhere. People were screaming and running away, and the driver was stumbling out of the car, looking dazed.
"Oh shit,"
Sam ran towards the car, with Gray following close behind. The driver was bleeding from a head wound, and looked to be in shock. A woman was trapped under the car, her leg pinned beneath the wheel. She was screaming in pain, and trying to free herself but to no avail.
"Help me!" the woman cried, "Please, help me get out!"
"Okay, okay, just hold on," Sam said, "I'll give it a try."
Sam grabbed the car and tried to lift it with all his might, expecting it to be heavy. But to his surprise, the car was launched into the air, and landed a few feet away with a loud crash.
The onlookers in the street gasped, and Sam turned to see Gray smirk at him.
"Oops," Sam said sheepishly, before running to the woman's side.
"Are you okay?" Sam asked,
"Thank you - FUCK that hurts - so much," the woman said, "I think my leg is broken."
"Um, I'm not a doctor," Sam said, "quick, someone call an ambulance!"
"No need," Gray said, "I got this."
Gray took out her arbitration device, and began to type in a series of numbers. She then placed the device by the woman's leg, before taking a step back.
"Oh no, not that," Sam said, recognizing the device, "You're not going to-"
But it was too late. The ground began to shake, and darkness swept over the street. Familiar eyes-not-stars blinked open, and a presence filled the air.
The crowd went silent, not a single person daring to move amidst the terrifying weight of the void.
Then as quickly as it had come, the darkness vanished, and the street returned to normal.
"All good as new," Gray said with a smile
Indeed, the leg was now perfectly fine, with no sign of injury at all. The woman stood up, testing her weight on it, with a look of disbelief on her face.
With a nod of thanks, she walked away, leaving Sam and Gray alone in the street, with the crowd gawking at them in awe. Nothing but sirens could be heard in the distance, the paramedics on their way.
"Uh, Gray," Sam said, "maybe don't invoke eldritch horrors in public next time?"
"Hey, it worked, didn't it?" Gray said, "Besides, it's not like anyone will remember it. They'll just think it was a miracle."
Sam shook his head, "Crazy motherfucker."
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"It's too bad we didn't get that on camera," Sam said, "That would have been great for the channel."
"Well, it looks like we didn't have to" Gray said, pointing to the bar's television screen, sipping a pina colada.
The news was showing footage of the car crash, as taken by a bystander's phone. "Real life superheros?" the headline read, "Mysterious duo saves car crash victim with magic?"
Sam and Gray watched as the footage showed the car being catapulted into the air, and returning to the ground with a crash.
"I didn't mean to do that!" Sam huffed, "Gray what the hell? When did you give me super strength?"
"Ah, well you see," Gray said, "when I made your body, I may have added a feature or two. You know, just in case."
"You didn't tell me! What if someone got hurt?" Sam said, "What if I accidentally killed someone?"
"Well, I kind of forgot," Gray said, "and it only activates in stressful situations, like when you're in danger or someone else is, so I didn't think it would be a problem. Thinking of it, it's not the first time you've used it. What about the time you fought that mugger?"
"No, that was different," Sam said, before pausing, "Wait, now that you mention it, I did tear out a god's throat with my bare hands. That was weird."
"See, it's not so bad," Gray said, "It saved your life, and now it saved someone else's."
Sam glared at her, "What else did you add?" Sam asked, "Do I have laser eyes? Can I fly?"
"Are you kidding?" Gray said, "I'm not that crazy. Lasers are too impractical, whatcha going to do if someone holds up a mirror? And flying? Really? You'd need wings for that, and I'm not going to give you wings. You'd look ridiculous."
Sam sighed, "I guess you're right. I just wish you'd told me about it before."
"Sorry," Gray said, "I'll be more careful next time. I promise."
The two of them sat in silence, watching the rest of the news report. The footage showed witnesses being interviewed, and reporters speculating on the identity of the mysterious duo. Suprisingly, there was no mention of the eldritch void that had been summoned to heal the woman's leg. Everyone seemed to have forgotten about it.
"Hey, aren't you those guys?" the bartender asked, "The ones on the news?"
Sam and Gray looked at each other, before nodding.
"No way!" the bartender said, "That's amazing! How did you do it?"
Just as Sam was about to answer, the bartender's eyes widened, and he pointed to the television screen.
"This just in!" the news anchor said, "The mysterious duo has been found! We bring you live to the scene!"
Sam and Gray turned to see a news van pulling up outside the bar, and a reporter stepping out with a camera crew in tow.
"Shit" Sam said, he turned around to see a patron filming them with their phone.
"You snitch!" Sam shouted, before running towards the back door.
"Sam wait!" Gray shouted, running after him.
The two of them burst out of the bar, and ran down the street, with the news crew hot on their heels.