“Fate did indeed have a large part in guiding you to certain situations.” Colandria said.
Shade winced. She was right, he didn’t like the answer. “How much is large?”
“I’m not sure I know what you mean by that.” She replied.
“Am I just a puppet?” He asked intently. “Are we all just puppets? Do I have free will? Or am I just doing whatever this fate bullshit wants me to do? Does anybody make their own choices, or is the world just a pre-written book and we’re all just traveling actors acting out a play.”
“Are you looking for another excuse for why you did the things you did?” Ashera cut in with venom. “Hoping you can mark it down as the fates pushed you to do it. How scummy can you…”
Colandria put up her hand, and Asheras mouth closed, not of her own free will. “I’m sorry child, I know you must be boiling with anger, but now is unfortunately not the time for it.” She then again turned her attention back to Shade. “Fate is a difficult thing to explain. It doesn’t control what you do, you’re not a puppet. It doesn’t touch all people either, in fact it doesn’t touch most people. How it actually pushes people to act is different in every situation. I think the easiest way would be to review some of the things you mentioned. Let’s start with the fact that you disappeared for a decade. I have to be honest with you, I was impressed. You hid so well that even I thought you had died. I wasn’t sure how that man in Merellien would have killed you, but when even I couldn’t find you, I became convinced. I think fate also wasn’t sure you were still alive, which is even more impressive. Though, as far as I can tell, fate never touched you before that fateful night you reappeared. Speaking of that fateful night, you being in the same town as Faylen was actually a coincidence. The proof though of you choosing your own actions starts there. The way fate works is it pushes people it thinks will take action into situations where it wants something to be done, maybe someone to be saved. That night, it had pushed another person in the town to save Faylen, but that person, after investigating the hotel, decided not to pursue it. Of their own free will. That’s when you, I believe, felt a large amount of power from somewhere in the town. That was fate. It broke the rules of the world. You shouldn’t have been able to sense it, to feel it. But fate, in an act of desperation, broke the rules in an effort to get someone to save Faylen. I don’t think you realize how big of a deal that really is. Fate had in the past bent rules, but never flat out broken them. I’ll explain a little later why that was such a huge deal, but for now, back on topic. Fate made it so anybody who could manipulate souls would be able to sense the dormant power within Faylens, as long as you weren’t directly connected with her. This of course meant that once you connected with her, you could no longer sense her power, which you of course found out. I believe it did this as none of the people running the auction had the ability to manipulate souls, so it knew if it broke the rules that way, none of the people at the auction would realize how strong she was. It made a gamble, hoping that someone with your natural ability was in town, or at least somewhere relatively nearby. When you went into the auction and bought Faylen, that was of your own free will. Fate didn’t make you do it, it just made a situation where you had the knowledge and ability to do so. As I said, fate, I’m pretty positive, didn’t even know you were still alive either. You should have seen my face when you revealed yourself to Faylen. I’m the goddess of life, I can see everything, and everyone living on the planet, yet you somehow had hidden from me. I can’t stress how impressive that is, and how scary it is for a non-God to be able to pull off such a feat. Continuing on though, fate didn’t push you, from what I can tell, to take her to Aerith and break her curse either. It also didn’t push you to stay and help train her. This is though where I think it did start to sink its claws in you. I’m not sure how it did it, but I believe it pushed you to go to that human village which was overrun by monsters. This is another way of showing you free will. I believe it wanted you to save the dragon that had been enslaved, as you had saved those dragons at the tavern. The fire dragon that you ‘fought’ was actually the last alive in his family’s bloodline. A powerful bloodline. I believe fate wanted you to save him, instead, you killed him. Then went village to village, killing the other enslaved dragons as well.”
“So then why is it still using me then?” Shade asked. “If I’m doing things it doesn’t like, shouldn’t it go push someone else?”
“This answer you also might not like.” She replied. “Fate prefers people who take action. That person who it pushed to save Faylen, but didn’t, from what I can tell, fate hasn’t touched since. While the action you took it most likely didn’t like, at least it was an action. Something it could build off. You’re not a puppet, but you are somewhat similar to a piece on a game board. A piece that controls itself, but still a piece. If you’re playing a game, and nobody makes a move, then nothing happens and nothing moves forward. But if someone makes a move, even one you don’t like or agree with, you can then strategize how to point them to the next move you do want them to make.”
Shade nodded to himself. “You’re saying if I sit around and do-nothing, fate will start to leave me alone?”
“Most likely.” She replied. “But that’s the thing, I think you’ve been wondering about this for far longer than you let on. Yet, you’ve still taken action at every turn. And I think fate knows that.”
Shade didn’t reply immediately, trying to determine his next line of questions. He looked around the room a few times while thinking, making a pointed effort not to look at Ashera whose glare he could still feel. Eventually he looked back to Colandria, who was patiently waiting for his next inquiry. “What is fate? No, I guess I should ask, who controls fate? Or is fate its own person?”
This time, she didn’t respond immediately, her face looking like she wasn’t sure how to answer. “This is where we get into why it was such a big deal fate broke the rules of the world. Unfortunately, I don’t have an answer for you. While I and some of the more powerful gods can feel its tugs, can sense it at work, I don’t actually know what it is or who controls it.” She paused again, a bit of apprehension coming over her face. “I’m not really supposed to tell you any of this, but the reason I can’t tell you any of it is one of the reasons I’m surprised by what fate did. As well as one of the reasons why I think Ashera followed you here. Though I’m not sure she still wants to ask you for help after finding out who you were.”
Shade, after making sure not to look her way, rather reluctantly peered over at Ashera, whose mouth was still forced shut, but was glaring at him with pure venom in her unblinking eyes. He then looked back to Colandria. “Go on.”
She sighed, that same anxious, apprehensive look not leaving her normally smile filled face. “This world isn’t the only world in the universe. There are many, many worlds. Millions actually. When you look up in the night sky at the stars, each one of those represents another world. Millions of worlds, with millions of Gods. But there is one ultimate God. The God who created everything, every world and every other God. He also instituted the rules. Rules that some follow to a tee, like crazed zealots. As I told you the last time you were here, the reason I am in this temple locked away was because I broke one of those rules. My punishment was to be locked in this temple for 1000 years of solitude. That ultimate god though, disappeared one day, without a trace. Something you’re quite familiar with doing yourself. Some people thought it was a test for a while, but when you broke into my temple, and God didn’t come down to reclose it and punish me, or you, I became concerned. I started to think he was actually gone. And many others around the universe came to the same conclusion. I always had thought that God created and controlled fate. Or at the very least, programmed it how to work. But when fate went against the rules of the world that God instituted, my mind began to spin. So, I have no answer for you on who or what fate is, and what it ultimately wants.”
Shade once again took a minute to digest the information before asking more questions. “Finding out there’s millions of worlds out there is a lot to take in. Millions of Gods and some ultimate god as well, assuming that it’s all true of course. I’m still confused though, none of that explained what Ashera has to do with any of it. Obviously, fate pushed me towards her. Why did fate push me towards her? What did she want to ask me for help with that fate would also want as well? I assume telling me all that stuff about the gods right after mentioning her wasn’t a mistake. But what could she have to do with the Gods?”
Colandria's previously anxious face turned to a slightly seductive smile, with her voice matching. “I’ve seen the way you’ve stared at me. The way you’ve stared at my parts, or lack thereof. You may think us gods can’t have sex, but that’s not actually true. We can, in our own way. We can also have children as well. But, that’s against the rules. Why God would create something that can have kids, but ban them from doing so, I’m not entirely sure. That doesn’t matter though right now. Two of the gods, who had both come to the conclusion the ultimate God had disappeared, decided to break those rules. About 16 years ago they had a kid. The first ever godling. A child amongst two gods. This of course was a huge deal. Think about the way the world works. When two strong people have children, they tend to be strong themselves. Think about yourself and Faylen. So what do you think this godling is like power wise?"
“Strong.” He said.
“Very.” She replied. “This child though caused havoc within the world of the gods. Some were angry they had her, that the two gods had broken the rules. The zealots amongst the gods. They wanted to kill the child as in their minds that child shouldn’t exist. Some others felt like it was a power play. That the two gods wanted to have a child, hoping that child would be stronger than all the other gods and take its place as the new ultimate god. Others were happy to see the child, like a beacon of hope. Many gods were frustrated with the fact they couldn’t have kids or pursue love. A holy war amongst all the gods of the universe has been on the brink of breaking out for years now. The parents though, in my opinion, had no nefarious intentions. They had just loved each other and wanted to have a child. In an attempt to protect this child in case a war did eventually break out, they hid the child here, on this planet. Why, I don’t know, but they did. Seeing as the child would have no parents on this planet, they left her at an orphanage, the same orphanage as Ashera. They became close friends over the years, but when Ashera fought against, and was taken by hunters, the godling tried to protect her. She touched into powers she didn’t know she had. I’m sure you wouldn’t be surprised to find she couldn’t control them, and ultimately failed to protect Ashera. The hunters though, having witnessed the odd powers, became interested in her, and took her captive as well. Though as I’m sure you can surmise from having not seen her, she was taken to a different base then Ashera. I think fate wants you to save her.”
Shade looked at Colandria rather confused, with an eyebrow raised. “Ok, But why? I know fate already broke the rules once, but you think fate is taking a side in this apparent universal holy war? Wouldn’t that suggest fate itself believes that this ultimate God is gone for good?”
“No.” She paused. “Well, maybe. As I said, I don’t know who or what fate is, so I can’t rule any of that out. There is an issue closer to home though that I think it wants you to save her for. Merellien, to be specific.”
“What does Merellien have to do with the gods?” He asked, now even more confused.
“The way gods of all specific worlds work, are there’s a pantheon of sorts. A sort of hierarchy. I am the second strongest amongst the gods of this world, only weaker than the god of death. I believe one of the weaker Gods has also come to the conclusion that the ultimate God is gone. I think they are making a powerplay of sorts, trying to take over the world, hoping to increase their own influence.”
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“You think a God is backing Merellien?” He replied surprised, but then nodded to himself a few times. “That would explain how that merchant so easily became king and convinced everyone he had killed me. Religion does wonders for lies and conspiracies. But why would some God do this? Do you become more powerful with more followers, or influence?”
“No.” She replied. “That’s not how it works. Honestly, it’s a childish and silly endeavor. One of an immature, power-hungry person. But it doesn’t change the fact that they are still doing it. And a world-wide war, as you could imagine, would be devastating. Millions would die. I think fate is trying to stop that from happening.”
“You think fate is trying to drag me into this war in order to fight some god? I like to think of myself pretty highly, I don’t think there's many people out there who could kill me, but even I know If I faced anyone of similar power to you, I wouldn’t stand a chance. How would you, and fate, like me to fight this god?”
“You wouldn’t be alone; in this scenario you would have a godling by your side. And when you defeat this god, you do the same thing you always do.”
“Which is what?” He asked.
“Do you know what gods are?” She replied.
“I assume that’s a rhetorical question.” He said rather flatly.
She smiled. “Yes, it was. Gods are just souls. Very powerful souls, but still just souls, the same as what's inside of you. I look like this by choice, but I’m not actually made of water. I choose to look like this because water is the essence of life. Life was born in water, life needs water. Life and water go hand in hand. I can look like whatever I want though.” She then turned into a female looking raging blaze of fire, causing the temperature in the room to increase by a few degrees even in the few seconds she took that form. She then transformed into a female looking tree, her skin becoming bark, arms branches with leaves coming off the ends, while her hair looked like a gigantic piece of broccoli. Then, a female looking cloud, her whole-body white and plush looking, almost like she wasn’t really there. Finally, she returned to her water form. “I could even be a male if I wanted to, but I prefer looking and talking like a female. The point is, I am but a soul. A powerful one, but a soul non the less. A soul that beings like you, could eat.”
Shades eyes widened at the suggestion, then narrowed. “I can only eat the souls of a dead person. In reality though, it’s the body that’s dead, the soul is still alive, which is how I can eat it. If you don’t have a body, and are just a soul, how can I eat it? Unless you’re saying if I wanted to, I could eat your soul right now.”
“That is what I’m saying. Essentially, I don’t have a body protecting my soul. If you managed to pin me down, you could grab and eat my soul. The issue is the pinning down part. Gods are the most powerful beings on the planet, in the universe. As you already said, you wouldn’t stand a chance against me, or even the weaker one I believe is pulling the strings. That’s why you need this godling.”
Shade tapped his chin with his finger a few time thinking. “Do you at least know which god is doing all of this?”
“No, I don’t. I imagine it’s one of the weaker ones, so I would assume its not death. But after that, I have no clue.”
He nodded a few times while taking in all the information again. “So, to be clear, you want me to save some godling, probably help her train in powers I don’t understand, so that we can fight a god and I can eat his soul.”
“Essentially, yes.” She replied casually.
He shook his head and leaned back in his chair. After a few moments, he narrowed his eyes again as he stared at Colandria. “Alright, lets go back a few steps. Ashera asked this before, but you didn’t really answer it. If some god weaker than you is doing this, why don’t you get involved? Why don’t you just destroy Merellien and whichever god is behind them?”
Colandria, in response, slowly looked around her mostly empty dungeon like abode. “Why do you think even with the doors open, I stay inside here? Why would you think I refuse to leave?”
Shade considered the question. He went over in his mind everything she had told him so far. “You’re still afraid that this ultimate god will return, aren’t you?”
“Exactly.” She responded. “It may be selfish, and you may think I’m, selfish, but that’s the way it is. The ‘ultimate’ God was never one to take half measures. If he ever does come back and finds out about whatever god is doing this, he would surely kill them. And if I got directly involved, even if it was to stop another god from breaking the rules, the ultimate god would likely kill me, saying that it is not for me to play God so to speak. That’s one of the reasons I think this holy war hasn’t broken out yet. I believe the zealots are afraid to break the rules they hold so dear in fear of the ultimate gods return.”
Shade narrowed his eyes even more at this response, his voice becoming accusatory. “So, you want others to risk their lives for you, when you’re not willing to risk your life yourself?”
“Yes.” She responded. “Like I said, if you want to think I’m selfish, I wouldn’t blame you. But you have to remember, I am a god. Time flows differently for me you could say. A hundred years, a thousand years, that seems like forever for most. But for me, its nothing. I wouldn’t be happy if Merellien won, if they killed millions, but ultimately if they did, it wouldn’t change much for me. Rulers come; rulers go. Kingdoms rise, kingdoms fall. Honestly, the only reason I’m even interested in getting in the middle of this at all is the fact I think a fellow god is behind it. And the fact some of the other gods seem to be getting more involved than me. I want to stop this before they get themselves in trouble if the ultimate god ever does come back.”
“You mean like Rivas?” He responded.
“Yes.” She said. “Quick on the uptake, another the reason I like you. As you saw in Alessandria, Rivas has been blessing people who complete his ‘trials’. Giving them unnatural powers, powers they wouldn’t have access to normally. Like Gaelin, a wolf, gaining wings and the ability to fly. This isn’t that out of the ordinary, Gods have blessed people in the past, you might know of them as ‘heroes’. Gods though typically only bless one person at a time, and usually only one every hundred years or so at most. As you saw, he’s blessed far more than one person. Now, there are no official rules about how many people you could bless, but if the ultimate God decided he was doing this to counter Merellien, that would be breaking a rule. And like I said, there is no jury, no trial. If God finds you guilty, you’re guilty. I like Rivas, I used to get along with him quite well before I was trapped inside here. I would hate to see him killed for trying to stop some other god’s folly.”
“Does that mean we can cross Rivas off the list of Gods behind Merellien?” He asked.
“I don’t believe Rivas is the god behind Merellien either. But I can’t say for sure, he could be playing both sides. We won’t know until someone confronts Merellien directly.” Silence then broke out between the pair for a few minutes. Shade once again considering what she had told him, and her waiting for more questions, letting him silently ponder the situation. His face went through a myriad of rapid emotions, before finally settling on confusion. Colandria, noticing this, decided to break the silence. “You seem confused by something, what is your concern?”
“How much does fate know about people, their personalities, history, things like that?” He asked.
“As I said, I don’t actually know what it is, or how it works. It might know everything; it might know nothing. Are you still wondering about why it seems to be choosing you?”
“Yes.” He replied. “I understand what you said about it wanting people who take action, but I’m a lot like you. I’m extremely powerful, yet extremely wary of dying. Honor is bullshit, dying gains you nothing. You think I don’t know kingdoms rise and fall? I ran away from a kingdom, and might have caused it to fall. I would debate otherwise, but that’s not the point. I have taken action recently, but that’s because I’m really strong, and I know I’m really strong. There aren’t many people who could kill me. I haven’t taken action in any situation where my life was actually on the line.”
She smiled at him. “I don’t believe that’s true. You rushed to save Vestelle, not knowing who or what would be there. You went to take on an entire base of hunters, not knowing who would be there either. Then when you got there, you were told the leader was some strong rainbow winged fairy with the power of thousands of dragons being pumped into him, and yet you didn’t leave, you didn’t falter, you took them head on. Sure, it turned out that the leader was some fat, lazy noble who had no clue what to do with his power, but you didn’t know that. Alexis even showed up at one point. He’s one of the few people I believe you genuinely think could give you real issues in a fight. He was also there with another person, someone with a power you’d never seen before. If they both took you on at the same time, you would have been in big trouble. Yet, after breaking her power, and having the opportunity to run, you didn’t. You were willing to fight to the death. Fighting Alexis to the death for some old grudge might not be honorable, but you haven’t been nearly as allergic to deadly situations as you seem to wish to tell yourself.”
Silence then broke out between the pair again, this time for much longer. Ten minutes went by, twenty, then thirty. Shade spent the time mumbling to himself, looking around the room, sighing, leaning forward like he was going to say something, then not saying anything and leaning back again. Finally, he looked somberly over at Ashera, who was still staring at him with murder in her eyes. “Does any of it really matter though?” he said softly.
“What do you mean?” Colandria responded.
“Look at the way she’s looking at me. Like I’m the biggest piece of shit in the world. And she’s not wrong for looking at me that way. Let’s say I save this godling, train them, kill whatever God is behind this and save the world. A fucking hero. Would that really change the way people view me? Or would I just go back to being the black devil. Feared and hated. Ostracized from society. Drinking his sorrows away in human form in some back-alley taverns.”
Her smile slowly turned into a somber frown. “I think you know the answer to that.”
He nodded as he turned back to her, he did know. His history was never going to change, no matter what he did going forward. “But what about for dragons in general? Not all are like me. This is now the second time in merely a century that dragons have been persecuted. Is this just the new reality? That we’re going to have to fight all the time for our freedoms, or else fall to extinction?”
“Maybe.” She replied softly. “Racism and fear aren’t something that will ever go away, no matter how much people hope they do. There will always be those in the world who hate dragons, and wish to see them dead. And there will always be those in the world who will use that hatred to fuel their own power grabs. With that in mind, there is a clear way I can see dragons not having to worry about that, at least as much.”
“We take over the world.” He replied.
She shook her head though. “No, not the entire world. I wouldn’t want that, just as I don't want Merellien taking over the world either. But, let’s say dragons unified and formed a kingdom. An entire kingdom of dragons wouldn’t be something a lot of people would want to mess with. Dragons right now are easy pickings because of how individualized they are. But if somebody unified them and brought them together to form one kingdom, there safety would be all but guaranteed. I’ve even heard rumors of ruins up in the north that could be cleaned up and turned into a kingdom, should someone wish to do it.”
Shade sighed rather loudly. “Its like I’m speaking with Aerith. You’re not going to try to start a harem for me, are you?”
Colandria giggled. “No, I’m not. I must say, I was rather surprised when you turned her offer down. Maybe you are changing, at least a little. But whether it be me, Aerith, Gaelin or Alexis. All of us have different reasons for wishing your involvement, but the end goal is all the same. Merellien must fail. Right now, they are slowly taking out one of their biggest obstacles, dragons. Everyone knows how strong dragons are, everyone also knows how individualistic they are as well. Merellien is using that to take them out. If a majority of dragons either die or are enslaved, it makes taking over the world that much easier. That’s why having someone unify dragons is of upmost importance.”
He shook his head with a frustrated frown as an irritated anger began to consume him. “But why me? Why does it have to be me? Because I’m an Endross? What about my father, sister, brother? There are many Endross’, why me?”
“Because Mozan choose you.”
He let out a mock sarcastic laugh. “So? Have you forgotten? More than half the kingdom didn’t give two shits that Mozan had chosen me. There was going to be a civil war before I left, and there still was one after. Mozan choosing me meant nothing to anyone then, and it still means nothing now.”
She shook her head in response. “I don’t believe that’s true. You were but a child back then. Many thought you were too young, naïve, weak. Nobody would think that now. Everyone knows of the black devil. Everyone knows of the things you’ve done, heinous or righteous. Nobody would dare question your power.” She floated over to him, put her arms on the arms of the chair he was sitting in and got right in his face, her own face taking on a serious look as she stared into his anger filled eyes. “Since you’ve reappeared, I’ve been watching you intently. You know, and I know, that you’ve been running from your past for a long time. Trying to forget what you’ve done, who you’ve become. But whether it be reuniting with Aerith, Vestelle, Gaelin, Alexis or even your own daughter, you’ve been slowly forced to face this past. Forced to remember, recall the memories of things you’ve long wished to forget. The world though doesn’t have time for you to slowly come to grips with what you’ve done, and who you are. Time is running out on dragons, on the godling and on the world as we know it. It’s time for your running to end. It's time for you to face where it all began. It's time for Valvath Endross to return.”