“Exhale and push all the air out of your lungs,” Hall was guiding Cass through drawing magic for the first time. “Then breathe deeply and imagine energy gathering in your chest, flowing from the air to your blood to your heart.”
Cass was sitting cross legged across from Hall, her eyes closed and following his instructions. Despite normally be anxious around Hall, she found this exercise very relaxing. And as it went on she began to feel something building in her chest, it she had to describe how it felt… It was like her heart was racing, even though it was not. Hall had warned her of this feeling, and she struggled to control her breathing and heart rate. Even though the feeling was not actually her heart, it would cause her heartbeat to increase, and it would interfere with her concentration at first.
“Good,” Hall said encouragingly, he was holding one of her hands and had her move onto the next step. “Now imagine that power flowing through your blood to your hand.”
Cass obeyed, and Hall drew the power out of her through his own hand. Learning magic was dangerous, holding all that energy in a human body would be dangerous without practice. But practicing itself risked losing control, so a more learned mage would guide a student through the process and draw the excess energy from them.
Cass could not help but gasp, “This feels…”
“A feeling of euphoria is normal at first,” Hall’s tone was gentle, it confused Cass but she let it go for now. “The feeling of energy moving through your body can feel wonderful, but many amateur mages lose control at this stage, distracted by the feeling. But you will not, you would rather be rewarded than punished, yes?”
Cass had been losing control, unsure how to handle a ‘good’ feeling. She had almost no experience in controlling happy emotions, but Hall’s last statement injected fear into her. She did not want to experience his magic again, and that fear helped her resist the energy that flowed through her.
Hall continued to speak, explaining the process as he went. “Despite how it feels, the power is actually flowing from your blood rather than the air itself. Mana does gather from the atmosphere into a mage’s blood, but the process occurs through the skin and the eyes and not through the breath. This process is much slower than the rate at which a mage can expend mana, so you will need to use your magic and gain an understanding of how much mana you have.”
Hall paused for a moment, than said ruefully, “Although that applies less to you than most magic users. The Glyph of Absorption was meant to power other glyphs without the need for a mage, and as a result, you draw mana far faster than a normal human mage. Still, you have limits, and you must be aware of them.”
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Hall took her other hand, instructing her to pour her energy through both hands to exhaust her power and find her limits. But Cass became distracted, her eyes were closed but she knew she was blushing slightly when Hall had taken both her hands. But why? Cass told herself that it was just that she had never held anyone’s hands before, but she worried about her own thinking that she had this reaction to a man who tortured her so much. Still, he was not all bad, as long as she did not make mistakes…
“Cass,” Hall said sharply.
Cass realized she was losing control, the distraction had disrupted her thinking and meditation. She could not control her breathing anymore, and she became more and more panicked. She felt the power inside her start to burn, and then Hall grabbed her hands more forcefully and she heard a crackling sound as he ripped the power out of her.
Cass collapsed on the floor, gasping for air. Feeling both exhausted and aching, a far cry from the pleasure of earlier. Opening her eyes, she flinched seeing Hall’s angry and disappointed face.
“I expected more from you,” Hall sighed. “Losing control like that, if I had not drawn the energy from you it would have consumed you.”
Cass noticed burn marks on Hall’s hands, this training was dangerous for the teacher as well it seemed. “I-I am sorry, m-my lord…” She could barely breathe, but she forced out her apology. Cass was confused as to why she actually felt bad about it, “I was distracted, I will not let it happen again.”
“We are at the end of our time today anyway,” Hall said standing up, and waving the guards forward to pick Cass up. “But losing control like that… It is dangerous, it can kill a mage easily. I think you need some encouragement to avoid that.”
Cass’s eyes widened and tears came to her eyes, she had almost made it through the day… She begged Hall not to use his magic, knowing full well that he would not listen. But to her surprise, Hall actually agreed.
What had Hall done to her, that she was earnestly thanking him for calling for a whip? Cass’s emotions were in chaos, she knew Hall was evil, but he was not totally so. And it was messing with her head. She barely noticed being stripped to the waist and shackled to the cold wall and was only brought back to reality by the first stroke of the whip.
“Clearly I am too attached to you,” Hall mused. “I really had planned to test my magic on you, I will have to find another subject now perhaps.”
“Th-thank you, Lord Hall.” Why did she mean that? Why was Cass thanking this bastard? Cass realized that the fear she had felt before was hardly real fear, but real terror found her when she felt that staying here might cause her to lose her mind! Something was bending inside her, and she was afraid it would simply break one day.
Fifteen strokes later, Cass was hanging slack in the shackles, trembling against the stone. Hall took her down and helped her with her tunic, before ordering the guards to take her back to her room. Cass was not thinking clearly, nearly delirious, but this was the first time Hall had bothered to have her covered before having her sent back. Why was she so grateful for that?