Min Jun

Work kept me so busy, it kept my mind off of Juniper. I figured I would be able to talk to Juniper after the audition, as Saturday finally came. We had only exchanged a series of text messages throughout the week. I kept the texts short and sweet. I just wanted to be focused on what I needed to do for the audition. I know I should’ve talked to Juniper, there is so much I need to say but I don’t know if she would understand. However, Samantha was happy I told her about the audition. She said she would come and cheer me on. After my conversation with Jin and Mindi, I saw what had to be done and I needed to set things right. I really hope Juniper doesn’t hate me after this. I really want to keep her in my life.

Juniper

I received a text from Min Jun asking if the audition was still going to happen. He didn’t even ask about what happened on New Year’s Eve. He hasn’t spoken to me or according to Taehyung by way of Se-ra, he hasn’t been the same. They say he has been a little withdrawn and antisocial. I needed to talk to him. We needed to get this out in the open. I wanted to talk to him and figure this out together. I don’t know if I could keeping going on if this is how she plays. She wants him badly. I care for him, but this past week has told me that I wasn’t ready for someone like her. She really wants Min Jun, even if it is just for the spotlight. She can have it, I have no problem staying in the background. I decided to call him, I needed to hear his voice, I needed him to talk to me.

“Hello?” He answered. He sounded like he was being bothered.

“Hi Min Jun, it’s Juniper.” I said, just in case he forgot what I sounded like.

“I know it’s you.” He said coldly.

“You have a minute?” I asked.

“Sure, wassup?” He replied.

“Can we meet to talk about what happened?” I asked. I heard him sigh, he may not be ready to talk about it.

“Uh, I don’t have time to talk for the next few days. Can we talk at the audition?” He asked.

“Sure. I answered.” I hesitated. There was one question I needed to ask him.

“Min Jun?”

“Yes?” He answered.

“Do you?” I asked. He knew exactly what I meant. He hesitated before answering. I’m not really sure if he would answer.

“Do you?” He replied, turning it around on me.

“That’s not answering my question.” I smiled. There was hope, or at least I was hoping it was.

“I know. You didn’t answer mine either.” He stated. Was he avoiding the question?

“Ok. I see. Ok, well I’ll let you go. Bye.” I hung up the phone. I didn’t want him to answer the question anymore for fear that he may answer it differently than before. If this was meant to be, then it will happen; I will have no choice to live with whatever decision.

He didn’t give me anything to go on, he made no mention of the incident and it seems as though he’s not trying to say anything about it. It worries me to be honest. I don’t know what he is thinking and it makes me want to ask a bunch of questions.

This content has been misappropriated from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

“Chanel, what the fuck am I to do?” I said while I was getting ready to head over to the studio.

“Talk to him. Tell him what’s up, be real.” She said. I’ve been trying to, but it’s like he has closed off. Usually I would talk to him every day, but this has been damn near an entire week.

“I’m gonna just let this ride. I don’t know what the fuck to do. I’ve never been in this position before and I have nothing more to give. I’m gonna lay all of my cards out on the table, I’m tired of this shit.” I said. I was tired, I was ready to move forward. I’ve been in the waiting pattern before and that shit is tiring.

Chanel met me over at the studio around 5 pm. The place was packed with people, they were here to see the idol group as well as see the competition. The entertainment company decided to make a series out of the auditions for the new choreographer, so it was a whole big production. I knew fans would show up, however I just didn’t expect so many. I saw a few fans with signage that had pictures of Min Jun and I. I smiled, I felt the love from people I didn’t know. They saw the love between Min Jun and I. I know it’s still there, but he would need to give me some kind of indication that he still wants me, because ‘m so unsure and I don’t see it now.

I had made my way up to the studio and over to Sara and Alex. They were surprised at how big the production was, considering they were a small dance studio. I guess I didn’t explain how elaborate it would be, but I figured they would know since it was a major Kpop Idol group, so I assumed they would know it would be a bit over the top. Min Jun came over to me while I was talking to Sara.

“Hey you.” He said walking over to me. He had a look of uncertainty. I turned towards him and opened my arms.

“Good to see you.” I said as he walked into my arms. We held each other for a moment and then stepped away from each other.

“I didn’t expect it to be this huge. You didn’t tell me that it would be this big of a deal.” He said looking nervous.

“I thought when I told you that it was for a popular group that you would understand how big it would be. I figured, you of all people would know that.” I said. He smiled and looked at me. That smile made me melt.

“You are correct. You got me there.” He said looking around. People were taking pics of everything that was going on. He took my hand and pulled me over to the side, away from the front lines. We found a dark corner in the hallway to have a quick chat.

“I know I haven’t been the best person in the past few days. I’ve been trying to figure things out.” Min Jun said, looking down caressing my hand.

“I get it. I have been thinking as well. I don’t know how to say this but, I don’t think I’m built for this.” I said. I was throwing in the towel. I didn’t want to have to compete to be with my boyfriend because his ex can’t deal with the fact that they are no more. His face dropped. He looked as if he had lost his best friend.

“What?” He said looking worried.

“I don’t want to have to compete for you. Look where it’s gotten me. Everything looks bad and I have no words to explain that shit that you have seen. I don’t know what happened that night and I know you’ve seen the pictures. I don’t want to have to look over my shoulders, always waiting for the other shoe to drop anymore.”

“You won’t have to anymore. Can you trust me? Please, don’t make up your mind right now. There is something I need to tell you. I have something you will want to hear.” He begged.

“Trust is the part I’m having a hard time with right now.” I said. His face froze as if he was slapped.

“Don’t worry, you are not the only one.” He said, looking at me directly. I felt his stare, I felt his pain. He was hurt.

“Why are you doing this?” I asked. “Why are you going through the motions?”

“You already know why Juniper, I don’t have to tell you. You already know the answer.” I did. I saw my glimmer of hope, no matter how small it was, it was there.

“I’ll talk to you later. The audition is about to start. Good luck.” I said. He walked over and planted a nice, deep kiss on my lips. It felt so damn good, I felt my panties get suddenly wet between my thighs. It’s shit like that that makes me want to rethink breaking up.