We're all monsters. Some just show it less than others– Senseless

Sen returned to his rather simple home after the incident. It wasn’t too far from where the monster was killed and captured, which was a good and bad thing. The good was that he got to escape rather quickly. The bad was he was becoming quite unnerved by how many monster attacks there had been around his area.

He was concerned about his family’s safety when they needed to run errands outside, which was ironic coming from him. After all, he was the only one in his family who didn’t have a Super Sense to defend himself.

His mother and sister both had Touch as their Super Sense, so if they were in danger, at least he knew they could make it out alive, which wasn’t the case for him. But still, he wasn’t worried about his own safety, practically never, which should be the opposite since his, quote-unquote, "disability." He didn’t know why he took so little concern for himself; it felt like he would naturally figure it out. It truly sounded like he had a god complex or something. I should probably be careful; I don’t want to die before I find him...

“I’m home!” Sen exclaimed, slipping off his shoes with a sigh of relief and placing them in their organized spot.

“Ah! Welcome back home, Senju dear!” a gentle voice greeted him at the entrance of his home.

“Thank you, Mrs. Mika.” Sen bowed his head respectfully to the elderly lady. The bright older woman was not his mother but his family’s servant, which was definitely a luxury to many, but by all means, his family was nowhere near rich or wealthy. His family was barely able to afford their accommodations.

“I have dinner set on the table whenever you’re free. Oh, and your sister should be coming home soon, too,” Mrs. Mika informed him.

Sen gave a nod to Mrs. Mika, appreciative of her hard work. She began working for his family when his mother fell ill not so long ago. She was now recovering from her illness, which had been cured thanks to the advancements in technology over the years. Although, even after the successful operation, doctors still suggested she should take it easy, which was one of the reasons why they decided to hire a servant to cook and clean, something he himself didn’t have the time to do as much as he wanted.

Which would be a surprise to many. People often told him he looked cold, so they took it upon themselves to label him as an ungrateful, edgy teenager. But in truth, he was far from it. He valued his family a lot and didn’t want to be one of those edgy middle schoolers who disliked everyone just because, well, they thought it was cool. He was far from that; he didn’t specifically try to hide his emotions just for the sake of attention. Sen just didn’t find things amusing like others did.

It was the same concept with interacting with other people. He didn’t show enthusiasm because, well, he didn’t find them worth talking to. He didn’t understand why people had a hard time understanding such a concept. But then again, he wasn’t too surprised by their incompetence to understand something outside their individual understandings.

After all, people were too focused on creating their own delusional fairy tales to cope with their misfortunes. The majority of people his age were wasting their lives away behind a computer, fearing the world, being depressed, and shut-in. At least he was glad not to be tainted by such degeneracy.

Feeling a bit rushed to make it to dinner time, he took a quick shower and got into his fresh sleeping attire. He contemplated brushing his teeth before eating but decided to do it after. He didn’t want to brush his teeth twice. He always overthought small, individual, mundane things to the best of his capability. It was a curse and a gift at the same time. He didn’t quite like that aspect of himself, but it was unavoidable.

Heading downstairs, he heard faint reporting noises coming from the TV. He guessed the news station was turned on by Mika.

“Oh dear…” she gasped.

“What’s wrong, Mrs. Mika?” he asked, joining her in the living room.

“It seems there was a monster attack not so long ago near us. It took the life of a five-year-old boy. I hope you were safe when coming home from school today,” her voice croaked with concern. Well, I was safe, but definitely closer than I should have been. He was reluctant to respond to her question truthfully, so he just gave her a vague response.

“Ah, that’s unfortunate. The family must be grieving greatly.”

“Indeed, I couldn’t imagine being killed by a monster,” she shivered. “Well, I’m sixty years old, so I guess I should be careful when going out. Especially since my ‘Hearing’ has been decreasing quite a bit.”

Her Super Sense ‘decreasing’ was still a hundred times better than Sen’s normal hearing. She was still far safer than he was.

“Oh, Mika! The food looks splendid!” a cheerful tone thanked the servant.

Sen turned around to meet the bright remark. The person entering the living room was his mother, Jen Ano. Her face was smooth regardless of age, and her bright attitude was always apparent day in and day out. She had long, silky white hair coupled with perfect ocean-blue eyes. Everyone said he and his sister looked identical to her, but in personality, he was the polar opposite of his mother. His sister, Hana, had definitely taken after her mother's persona, along with her short temper. Even though his mother was always cheerful and mostly composed, when she got mad, it was a very big deal. People with Touch often had the same problem with being short-tempered. They used their fists more than their brains when sudden impulses came over them. While Sen, on the other hand, wasn’t too sure where his personality came from. He guessed he took after his father.

Not that I got to know him too much, he thought bleakly. He clutched his fists at the thought of his father.

“AHHHH, I’m so goddamn tired!” an exasperated voice entered the front door.

“You came just in time for dinner, Hana,” his mother smiled brightly.

“THANK GOD! I’M STARVING!” Hana cried.

His sister had returned home from her part-time job as a waitress. She was saving up money for her own reasons. Hana was two years older than he was and had just graduated from high school a few weeks ago. She was mostly kind to him. ‘Mostly’ was due to the fact she would manhandle him like a rag doll. Although she didn’t do it intentionally, her fits of anger did get strenuous, but needless to say, she was a kind sister.

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“Hey Senju!” Hana realized he was present. “How was school today?” She jumped and embraced him. Her arms were wrapped tightly around him to the point he felt lightheaded. Not this again.

“C-could you not squeeze so hard,” Sen gasped for air.

“Oops, my bad. Sorry, Senju.” She released her grip, leaving him breathless. Her blue eyes sparkled mischievously while she pulled her long white hair into a ponytail. Mom and her really do look alike, he realized. They were almost a carbon copy of each other.

...

"Thank you for the meal!" they all said in unison by the dining table. Today Mrs. Mika prepared a simple but large dinner for them. Grilled fish with a side of caramelized carrots and shallots, perfectly smooth and rich miso soup to wash it down, and of course, white rice on the side to bring all the dishes together. Mika also went even further and prepared some pudding as a dessert.

"This looks so goooood!!!" Hana lavished, licking her rose-luscious lips with anticipation.

"Now, now, don’t hold back. Dig in!" Mika pressed them, a smile of gratification on her face.

"Don’t mind if we do!" Jen accepted the food with gratitude. "Oh, Mika, you’re not eating?"

"Oh no, thank you, dear, but I already made my dinner prior to this one."

"Well then, if you still haven’t had enough, please sit with us. We won’t be able to finish everything ourselves."

Mrs. Mika gave his mother a small bow in appreciation for the offer. While they started to eat, their servant walked over to the couch and switched the channel to the TV, enjoying her rest.

Sen took the first bite. The flavors were simple but rich and juicy. Taking a bite of the fish, he was pleasantly surprised that it was perfectly tender and sweet. It wasn’t fishy at all. Standard white fish were naturally less pungent than others, but taking that away, it was still impressive how well-cooked the meat was.

It took a moderately advanced individual to cook meat at the exact temperature and time. He was no stranger to cooking either; he was confident in saying he was well acquainted with the practice. And as someone who knew the difficulty of learning the strenuous process, he was impressed. The servant had been helping them for a few months already, maybe even close to a year, but yet she didn’t cease to impress his delicate tongue.

"Delicious!!!" Hana gasped in comfort. "I just can’t get enough of this!"

"Indeed so. Well done, Mika, you truly are such a big help," his mother chimed in.

"Ho, ho, I’m glad you like it. It wasn’t anything special after all."

"AW DON’T BE MODEST!" Hana exclaimed. "This is truly amazing, Mrs. Mika!"

Small talk, he sighed. He agreed with them, but the small talk conversation irked him for some reason. He was far from being mad, it just seemed pointless to him. Some people enjoyed overly inducive gratification, while he mostly exchanged a few words and carried on. Maybe he was weird for not liking that, he supposed. Hey, as long as it doesn’t involve me being a part of a useless conversation, then I guess I shouldn’t be complaining—

“So, Sen, tomorrow is your birthday. Have anything planned?”

Of course, God works in mysterious ways. His mother decided to chime in when he was in the middle of thankfully not being a part of meaningless chatting. And it was a conversation he dreaded the most. My birthday. He was really hoping they might have forgotten his “very special day,” which he wished, but alas, it seemed they unfortunately remembered. He simply hated being in the center of attention. And on which day was everyone obligated to specifically cater to a person? Yes, it was their birthday.

“Uh, not so sure. I still have school tomorrow, so I'll plan on something afterward, I guess.” School, at this point, was going to be his safe haven on the promised ‘doomsday.’

“Really? If you miss one day, I think you’ll be fine. I’m sure your teachers will understand. Your scores are off the charts, one day won’t hurt them,” Hana reassured.

No, I don’t care about my test scores at all. It’s an excuse to minimize how much I celebrate my birthday, was what Sen wanted to say, but instead it came out–

“I’m aware, but I want to be consistent with my school work,” Sen blatantly lied. He could probably skip a few grades and still be an A+ student. He wasn’t the least bit worried about his academic life.

“You’re so mature and responsible. You remind me so much of your father when he was your age. In fact, sixteen was around the age I met him in high school—”

“Mother,” Sen interrupted, a sharp screech escaping his dining knife, “let’s not talk about him, now.”

His mother blinked in confusion. Her gaze lowered as if she was scolded by a teacher.

This wasn’t something he wanted to discuss over dinner. Especially coming from someone who’d lied to him. Hana nervously observed the sudden tension that was escalating on the dinner table.

“Uh, er, on another note, you won’t believe what happened at work today. A guy came up to me and said—”

“Sen, you should let it go. How long are you going to be running from the truth that your father is dead,” his mother muttered under her breath. Hana opened her mouth, realizing the inevitable outcome of the argument.

“Hm, is that so?” Sen probed calmly. “I don’t think that’s the case. Since you’re so cautious saying anything about him,” Regardless of his sharp words, he didn’t raise his tone. It remained flat and composed. He didn’t want to argue with his mother. He also had no ill intent or feelings about her either. But there was one thing he couldn’t let slide, and that was misinformation...

...

His father, Yami Huya, had died when he was around four (or so his mother said at least). Over the years, as he grew older, he found flaws in his mother’s speech when she would mention him or reluctance. She told him to get over it, yet she was so hesitant to say any information regarding him. And to make his suspicion even more concrete, his mother never once visited the grave of her so-called deceased husband. They never once held a funeral or wake for his body, and the so-called cause of death that inevitably claimed his father was apparently a car accident. After his death, his mother then changed his legal last name to hers, which was Ano. Not to mention, he has done his own due diligence and searched every possible information outlet or record of his father, but they all lead to the same conclusion: everything was wiped clean.

No, he simply couldn’t believe that was true. He simply couldn’t ignore all the connections he had compiled over the years of research. To say he put countless hours into the investigation of his father’s death would be an understatement. He went to the depths of the internet, the dark web, the deep web, but every last bit of information had already ceased to exist.

There was something his mother was hiding from him, and he was going to find it out. This was his ambition.

I’m going to find my father, either dead or alive. His eyes glowed with a familiar blue light that could only be described as pure power and confidence.

Both his sister and mother, and even his servant, grew silent. The aura that oozed out of Sen made them freeze with sudden fear.

For that split second, Sen seemed to lose control of himself, then swiftly came back. Sen had felt this when he was sparring with his sensei. At that moment, he went completely blank and acted on his sudden impulse. Maybe he was looking too much into it, after all, he always had a problem with overthinking things.

He glanced at his family; they looked petrified. Like they saw a ghost just now. He wasn’t so sure why, but they seemed frozen in a sudden state of fear. Soon, though, they gradually came back to their usual self and started finishing their meal Mrs. Mika made for them.

“Uh, well then, to change the subject, Hana, are you going to participate in this year's Knight Exams?” Mika sought to change the topic in hopes of de-escalating the tension.

“O-oh, y-yes, I think I will. I promised myself after high school that I would participate and see how things went. I have Touch, and I want to be more skilled at it,” Hana, still trying to regain her composure, replied.

Sen guessed she would try out to become a Knight sooner or later. It was probably for the best she did in order for her to master the art of her Super Sense.

Sen, of course, had no intention of joining because he simply couldn’t. In retrospect, there weren’t any rules directly stating you needed a Super Sense to join because of how rare senseless people like himself were. It still was very dangerous for him to get involved. Again, being at the center of attention was something he despised.

This line of thought gave him a sudden realization. She must be participating too, huh…

Sen had a certain friend whom he had been acquainted with for a long time. And it so happened that she and Hana would be participating in the Knight exams together.

“Thank you for the meal.” Sen stood up with his plate and neatly placed it in the dishwasher. While doing so, he noticed his mother's unnerved expression. He doubted she was hurt by his words; he hadn’t said anything horrible. The expression she was holding was something else. From the human psychology books he would read, he realized that it was the expression of guilt.