Missteps V.2
Chapter 13 – The Cube
By the time the foursome had returned from scouting, Ander and Kerri had rejoined Lia at the fountain.
Lia tucked the journal into her pack. “How’s it look down there?”
Iados pointed down the hall. “There’s a door at the end that was barred from the outside.” He chuckled. “After both Carric and I failed miserably, Jun lifted the wooden bar off like it was nothing. We didn’t open the door, but I did peep in through a crack at the bottom of the door. Didn’t see any ooze, but I did see furniture.”
Kerri clapped her hands excitedly “Well, what are we waiting for? We know the cube is in there, so let’s finish this.” She moved forward a couple of feet down the hall. Elaine cast a worrying eye over her friend as she walked past. She made note of the puffy eyes and fresh tear tracks.
Elaine jogged to catch up. “Are you ok?” She asked her friend.
Kerri waved her off. “I’m fine, I was just overwhelmed for a minute with all that dust.” Elaine wasn’t reassured.
Carric marched over and walked with his fellow half-elf. “I’m with Kerri, let’s finish up and get out of this depressing place.” He pointed over his shoulder. “I’ll assume that Jun and Iados will of course volunteer to go through the door first.”
Iados scoffed. “How come we have to go through first?”
The ranger held up his bow. “I’m much better long-range.”
“I don’t know, you were pretty good with these swords against the hood bandits.” Jun commented.
Iados's face twisted in confusion. “I don’t remember that.”
“You were unconscious, again.” Carric made sure to emphasize ‘again’. Iados glared.
“That was kind of funny thinking back on it.” Lia tapped her chin. “I come up the road, dragging an unconscious Ander, and there you were on the ground. If we weren’t in the middle of a fight I would have thought you were asleep.”
“You wouldn’t have thought it was very funny if you’d seen the blood pool.” Jun added.
The akudaem growled. “I’ve gotten better at dodging.”
Lia patted him on the back. “We know, and it’s all thanks to the slow dancing you did.”
Iados sighed as they reached the door. “It’s not dancing.” He pulled his club out. “I’ll explain later, let's just kill this thing.”
With a yell, Jun kicked the door open and strode in, his eyes scanning all around looking for the large transparent cube.
As everyone crowded in behind him, they all took a moment to take in the room. It was a large room, probably forty by forty. The corner opposite the door held the remains of several collapsed and melted wooden bookcases. The remains of a desk or table stood a few feet away. The floor itself was absolutely spotless save for a few divots from presumably the acidic creature. In a far corner, were the remains of a circle with runes etched into the stonework. Several of the runes were cracked, and parts of the circle had been rubbed off. On the far wall to their left stood a door.
Elaine was the first to see it. As she’d scanned the room, her light source hit the area around the circle…differently. It seemed to be refracted in a way. Either way, it wasn’t natural. Elaine hissed to her party members and pointed in that direction.
Lia made the first move against it. She knelt and sent green energy straight into the stonework. She felt the roots twist through the solid stone until they were right under where Elaine had said. A loud cracking sound filled the air, as weeds and vines sprang up out of the floor. In a matter of seconds, a twenty foot square of vegetation had captured the cube. As the vines twisted through its body, everyone could see as the acid corroded them. Already the smell of burning vine filled the air as the cube ate through its prison.
With the vines providing an outline, it was easier to get an idea of how massive the ooze was. It stretched itself over a large section of the area, the patch of vines barely large enough to encompass all of it. As the mashed and melted vegetation swam within the creature, it was clearly taller than any of the party members, and just barely stayed under the ceiling’s height of eight foot.
“Hurry and get through the door, I don’t know how long this’ll hold him!” Lia yelled as she moved farther into the room. Kerri, Elaine, Ander, and Carric all rushed past the vine patch. Carric was the closest to it, and with unnatural speed, a sliver of the cube shot out with a squelch and slapped Carric like a whip as he ran past. Carric hissed in pain as the acidic slap cut into his shoulder. Once they reached the door, they were relieved to find that it was unlocked.
Stumbling in, they found an area that could be called a chapel. About four or so pews were set up facing a table that was decorated as an altar with a black tablecloth reaching down to the ground. Candles were set up around the edges, with a metal outline of Zhagra’s symbol sitting on top.
Carric took up a position with his bow at the door. “Start looking for that letter.”
Ander and Elaine looked around the pews, while Kerri took the altar. As she moved the tablecloth aside, she screamed. Carric rounded on her, bow drawn.
“It’s ok,” Elaine assured the archer as she raced over. “It’s only a body.” As she'd lifted the tablecloth, Kerri had come face to face with a skeleton dressed in a black robe, curled around a wooden box.
“I’m so sorry,” Elaine whispered as she pulled off the skeleton’s fingers in order to reach the box.
Back in the room, the cube slowly but surely inched its way out of the vines. While Lia moved to a position behind it, Jun pulled out his javelins and chucked them at the cube. Iados, in an effort to cover Lia while she moved, had taken to grabbing pieces of strewn wood and throwing them into the mass as well. Each item thrown was just absorbed into the cube with a disgusting sucking sound. They could see the pockets of acid move around within it towards whatever the latest catch was.
“At least we can see it easily.” Iados said as he threw a whole shelf at the creature. Slowly the green vegetation was replaced with brown mush.
Jun threw another javelin. “Until it’s all dissolved anyway.” He could see that they were drawing its attention as it inched slowly in their direction.
Lia tried to lasso the cube back into the thick of the vines. The first vine that snaked out of her fist grabbed onto the cube, but before it could pull the creature back an acidic pocket moved and ate through the vine. On the second try she succeeded in pulling it back a few feet before the vine broke.
Jun glanced over at Carric in the second doorway. “What’s taking so long?” Little by little they could tell that the cube was taking damage as it seemed to shrink, but not enough.
Carric looked over his shoulder. “They’re being bested by a box.”
All three of them were trying to break open the box Elaine had taken off the body. After Ander accidentally hit Elaine’s finger instead of the lock, Carric gave an exasperated sigh and ran over.
"This was supposed to be quick." Carric took the dagger from Ander and broke the lock with one hit of the hilt. Inside was a folded piece of parchment and four gems. Ander quickly grabbed the gems and stuffed them in a pouch. Carric pocketed the parchment.
Iados stuck his head in the doorway. “Hurry up!” He yelled. As quickly as he was there, he was gone. Kerri headed to the door and got there just in time to see the cube reach out and grab onto Iados’s leg as he ran by. With a cry of pain, he tumbled to the ground, the acidic arm burning into his flesh. Jun ran forward and wrenched Iados out of its grasp. Lia stood near the door they’d entered from.
“Is there another way out of the room?” Lia yelled at Kerri. The cube was at the edge of her vines, and obviously its reach made the path to Jun and Iados dangerous.
“I don’t know!” Kerri yelled back, as panic began to creep into her voice. She turned around and found that everyone else was already working on it. Against the far wall was a familiar metal door, and this side had handholds. As she turned back to Lia, Kerri felt a stinging pain around her ankle.
“Shit!” Her ankle was pulled out from under her as the cube pulled her towards it. There was a grunt above her, and Carric’s hand had a tight grip on her upper arm. For a moment the young bard was the rope in a game of tug of war. With a squelch the cube lost its grip on Kerri’s ankle. Carric wasted no time in pulling Kerri back into the room.
“The metal door opened into this room!” Carric yelled out at the others as he watched Jun jam his last javelin into the creature. “We’ll meet you at the fountain!” He slammed the door to the chapel shut. Elaine and Kerri shoved a pew in front of the wooden door.
It took all four of them to pull up on the metal door, and it was a miracle that they were able to jam another pew under it for them to escape. As the four of them ran down the hall they heard the crunch as the pew gave up.
In a full-out run, it wasn’t long before Ander and his short legs started to fall behind. Carric paused and scooped the halfling up on his shoulder as he chased after the girls. As they ran up the illusioned hallway, all of them were too focused on getting back to their party members to be trapped by the illusion. Ander however was caught, and as Carric forcibly pulled him through, a stabbing pain went through his head that caused him to see stars and feel disoriented. Kerri flung open the door and led the way through the shortcut hallway they’d taken nary an hour ago. When they emerged into the main hallway, they saw Jun and Iados anxiously waiting for them while Lia stood on the lip of the fountain as she hurled puffs of gas at the cube to no obvious effect.
“Hurry!” Iados yelled as he and Jun started up towards the entrance. Carric passed the halfling off to Iados once they were in range, and he pulled out his bow once again. With Carric bringing up the rear, they all ran up the slippery passage. Thankfully it seemed to be easier going up than it was down, for some. Halfway up Kerri's foot that'd been grabbed by the cube gave up and she fell down. She started to slide back down towards the cube that was only a few feet behind them.
Jun reached out as Kerri slid past him and grabbed her arm. Her shoulder jostled painfully as her descent was abruptly ended, but she was too grateful to complain. With Jun’s help she scrambled up and they burst out in the fading sunlight with everyone else. Elaine and Carric stood at the mine entrance and fired a few more shots each into the creature.
The creature swelled up and filled the entirety of the tunnel, before it burst like a balloon. Ooze and acid mixed with the loose gravel and mud, as it all began to slide down into the mine. The smell of melting stone wafted up out of the passage as those with darkvision saw pools of acid bubble into the ground.
“Quick question,” Iados said as he stood watching the slow descent of the acid into the chamber below. “While you guys were furiously running for your lives, did you stop and grab the chest of money?” Silence descended upon the group for a full minute before Kerri burst out laughing, followed by Elaine.
Jun settled himself down on the muddy ground. “I think that’s a no.” His breath came in ragged breaths and his heartbeat was up. He felt like he was coming down off one of his rages, but he wasn’t.
Lia collapsed on the ground. “Is there a way we can get back in to retrieve the chest?” Iados sat down heavily next to her, and soon everyone was down in one form or another.
Ander had splayed eagle. “Maybe, anyone got some lye or ammonia?”
“I’ve got a bar of lye soap on me.” Carric said, with accompanying cries from Elaine, Kerri, and Jun. “Don’t think we’re gonna find any ammonia though.”
“That’s ok, remind me in the morning to test out the lye bars and see if that’s enough to neutralize the acid in the passages.” Ander’s voice was tired.
Jun stood up. “Hey, don’t fall asleep here, let’s at least make it back to the cave.” The berserker picked up the halfling (who protested only a little bit), and led the party back to the cave they’d used previously.
Jun and Iados volunteered to go find some firewood and they feasted on owlbear meat that night. Afterwards, they all settled in for an early night after a busy day.
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"So, what do you think of Ander's idea?" Jun asked Carric as they sat around the campfire. Everyone else had already turned in even though the sun had just set.
"You mean of joining up as an adventuring party?" Carric broke off some sticks and flung them into the fire. Jun nodded.
"Do you think it's a good idea?"
"It's a better idea then him just going off by himself." Carric gave a small chuckle. "What can I say, I mean, we've all heard the stories of parties going off and finding treasure. Treasure to set them up for the rest of the lives, treasure that made them nobles and knights. Daring deeds that made those groups legends."
"And how many of those legends survived their daring deeds?" Jun countered. "Ander said so himself, there are those who don't adventure because of how many didn't come back."
The ranger shrugged. “Risking death is part of the job description. You have to weigh whether the outcome and reward is worth the risk. I don't see the problem with adventuring for a while at least. In a party this size, we stand a good shot of getting out alive most of the time."
Jun sighed and hung his head, but he had a grin on his face. "You make a good point.” He turned and looked back at his sleeping comrades. “Most everyone seemed able to hold their own, including you.”
"I'm probably the person you have to worry about the least." Carric leaned back and stared up at the cave ceiling. "If we go through with this, let's make a deal: I'll keep an eye on Elaine and Kerri, and you keep Ander out of trouble."
"What about Lia and Iados?"
Carric grinned. “I say we leave it to them to keep each other out of trouble.”
Jun laughed. “Ok, and what if you get into trouble?"
"Then I fully expect you to rally the troops and come get my ass."
"And if I get in trouble?"
"Then I will rally the troops and run the hell away because I don't want to meet anything that can take you down."
Jun howled with laughter, before he stifled it and cast a nervous gaze out at those sleeping. "It's a deal," The two of them shook hands. The rest of the night passed uneventfully.
The next morning, Carric ventured out into the settlement in search of arrows and more salt. While he was gone, everyone else accompanied Ander back to the mine. They ground down the lye soap bars into a powder and set off. Elaine lit up more sticks and handed them out. She wasn't wearing her armor. She'd been convinced by Iados that she might not want to be weighed down as they went down a tunnel full of acidic puddles, just in case.
There'd been a late-night sprinkling, and that'd been enough to wash some of the larger acid puddles further down the tunnel.
Instead of walking in the mud, everyone walked on the exposed stone as much as possible. The stones were pockmarked from the acid, but they were the clearest acid-free trail they could see.
Ander tested the lye powder on some of the smaller acid puddles first. When the lye hit the acid, the surface fizzled a bit. Cautiously he tapped the solution with a stick. The wizard breathed a sigh of relief when the stick came away clean.
By the time they reached the now-broken fountain they'd found larger puddles of leftover ooze mass and acid. Some of the larger chunks still held the acidic pockets. The whole area had a rancid smell as what was left of the ooze decomposed.
With a small amount of the lye powder, Ander sprinkled it over the nearest acid puddle. The mixture immediately began to bubble and fizz with loud pops. Once it died down, Ander tested the puddle with his stick.
“I think this’ll work.” Ander held up the non-burned stick. “We’ll have to go slow, but we should be able to carve a path to the chest." It took the better part of the next two hours to navigate as straight a shot to the guardroom as possible.
They quickly found that the ooze was a very good vessel for carrying the acid far and wide. As the ooze spread out thin over the floor, the acid ate into the rock and created new cracks in the walls and floor. In a couple of places, the group could see where the larger cracks had compromised the wall integrity. Bits of dirt rained down as the weight of the mountain above bared down.
One of the more prominent places of this damage was the shortcut passage.
"Do we want to risk it?" Ander asked as he eyed the large crack that traveled the height of the wall.
"Not if we don't have to." Jun moved the group down the main hall and through the door that still sat opened. Just inside the door was one of the largest puddles of ooze, since it'd been funneled into one place. Ander used the powder, but he couldn’t be sure how much of it was acid and how much of it was ooze.
Kerri she surveyed the space. "We don’t all have to go in. I'm pretty sure I can jump that easily enough."
Iados had already handed his club to Lia as he stretched. They'd all left the majority of their gear back at the cave. No sense in risking it down here with the acid. Kerri handed her sword to Elaine before she stretched. She sang a quick little song to herself to bolster her confidence.
"We're so close now,
Just a jump and a skip,
To the treasure we found,
In this acidic pit."
Elaine shrugged. "It’s not one of your better ones, but I guess it'll work."
Kerri scoffed. "Let's see you do better."
"And dare to do better than one who's been trained her whole life to perform feats of song and dance, I wouldn’t dare." Elaine smiled sweetly. "But in all seriousness, be careful."
Kerri nodded and turned to Iados. "You or me first?"
"Why don't you let me, that way I can save your butt if you trip." Iados cocked a wicked grin. With a running start the akudaem executed a perfect long jump and cleared the puddle easily. He turned and gestured at Kerri. “Your turn.”
"Here goes nothing." Kerri ran forward and attempted a long jump same as Iados. Her jump was actually smoother than the former pirates, but no one but Iados noticed. She cleared the puddle no problem and stuck the landing.
"That was fun." Kerri told Iados, a huge grin on her face.
"What till you try that on a ship mast during a storm, then it's really fun." Iados laughed. He called out to the group on the other side of the door. "You guys want to toss us a light?" Jun threw one of the sticks and Iados caught it easily. "See you in a minute." The two of them headed off towards the chest.
"See, now if that was Lia, I'd be worried about growing bored." Ander commented as they watched the duo disappear around the corner. Lia rolled her eyes.
The wizard settled himself down an untouched piece of stonework. "So, have any of you thought more about my offer?"
"Carric and I talked about it last night, and we're both of the mind to agree." Jun kept his
eyes on the area around them.
"I have no problem with it. My only other career choice right now is working in a Temple and I don't want that." Elaine shrugged. "I can guess what Kerri's answer is."
Ander waved her off. "She already gave me her answer." He turned to the elf. "Lia?"
"Why not? It's not like I have a life waiting for me back home." Lia sighed and leaned against a wall. A bit of dust filtered down from above and landed on her. "I hope they’re quick, this place doesn't seem like it'll last much longer."
"Which is weird, because dwarves are usually very good builders, especially underground." Ander coughed from the dust.
"One could argue that they weren't exactly motivated to do their best in renovating this place." Elaine eyed the ceiling warily. Suddenly she darted her gaze around them. "What was that?"
"What was what?" Lia asked.
"I thought I heard something, it sounded like water." Elaine started to get worried. "How close to the mine was that underground river?"
"Close enough to be diverted. Stay here." Jun left the group and headed back down the hallway. He disappeared around the corner as he went down the shortcut.
"Hey guys, you mind hurrying up?" Ander called down towards Iados and Kerri. Jun reappeared from the shortcut.
"It's not coming from there," He continued down towards the fountain.
"You guys ready to catch?" A voice said from the doorway. Looking back, Iados and Kerri stood on the other side with the chest between them.
"Not quite, Elaine thinks she heard water and Jun went to go check it out." Lia explained. "How heavy is it?"
"Heavy enough, just move out of the way." Iados and Kerri began swinging the chest. "When I say 'Go', move." Iados began to count. He paused. “Real quick, when I say ‘move out of the way’, it’s because I don’t want anyone trying to catch this. Ok?”
Lia rolled her eyes. “Just throw the damn thing.”
The akudaem grinned. “Alright. 1, 2, 3, go!" The two of them hurled the chest over the puddle, but the angle was bad. The chest hit the side of the doorframe and burst apart at the seams. Money pieces flew everywhere.
"What the hell?" Jun roared, having arrived back just in time to watch the chest shatter.
Iados sheepishly raised his hand. "Sorry, my bad."
Jun just took a deep breath. "Lia, you and Elaine go get some bags to put the money into, I highly doubt all of it is going to fit in our pockets. The rest of us will start picking it up." Lia and Elaine ran off to follow Jun's instructions.
Elaine stopped for a second and looked back. "Oh, did you find anything?"
"There's some water bubbling up from the fountain. Everything else looked stable enough." Jun explained. Elaine nodded and ran off.
It took the girls about twenty or so minutes to come back with an emptied pack and a blanket.
Lia handed the blanket to Jun. "Best we could do, sorry." She tossed the pack to Iados. The throw was a little short, but Iados was able to reach out enough to just save it from the puddle.
"How bad's the loss?" Elaine looked at the large stacks of coin around Ander.
"Not as bad as it could have been. As long as the coins didn't fall in the acid pools, they seem to be alright. The ooze itself doesn't seem to hurt them." Ander gingerly picked up a gold piece and added it to the pile.
"Did you see Carric?" Jun finished messing with the blanket. Using some creative folds and knots, he was able to make quite a large bag out of it.
Lia nodded as she picked up a coin pile. "He was getting the last of the owlbear meat and hide ready for transport. We explained what had happened and he just laughed."
"We would have brought his blanket as well but he was already using it to hold the owlbear hide." Elaine winced as she accidentally touched acid instead of ooze.
Ander looked up. "Oh yeah, Iados, are you in or out with the adventuring party?"
"In!" Iados yelled back.
"Alright, let's finish this up so we can be done with this stupid mine." Ander had a renewed vigor as he fished out coins.
An hour later they'd managed to save as many coins as possible. Ander estimated that they'd lost roughly a fourth of their haul, but overall it could have been worse. By this point though, dust and dirt had started to fall with alarming regularity from the ceiling, and looks up showed that a fissure had formed. It originated from the shortcut hall and was spreading fast.
Iados easily lobbed the full pack over to Jun, and then backed up for a long jump. This time he didn't have a good start and landed in the puddle. As soon as his left foot hit the ground, he yelled in pain and jumped away as fast as he could.
"Iados!" Elaine and Lia yelled together as they crouched down next to him. His boot had the whole bottom missing as the acid ate through it to his flesh. Elaine took what was left of the lye and sprinkled some of it on Iados's foot.
Elaine shook her head. "We need to get him out of here before I can do anything more. I don't want to waste a healing spell until I get a better look at it." She and Lia helped Iados stand on one foot.
Jun turned back to the half-elf still waiting on the other side of the puddle. "Your turn Kerri." When he saw Kerri’s white face, he smiled reassuringly. "You'll be fine, just jump like you did before and you'll make it."
Kerri gave a big gulp and nodded. She took quite a few steps back, and then ran. Gracefully she cleared the puddle and stuck the landing.
"See, nothing to it." Jun patted her on the shoulder before he went and slung Iados over his shoulder.
The group headed off, and carefully made their way around the fountain. It was impossible to miss the new cracks that had developed both on the ceiling and on the remains of the fountain. Water gurgled out of the cracks in the spilled onto the floor. It mixed with the remaining ooze and acid. Even moving fast, it was impossible to avoid the acid now. Thankfully the water managed to dilute the acid, so that even though everyone's boots took the brunt of the acidic sludge, none of it penetrated to their flesh. They’d all have to get new boots.
Heading back up the passage, the extra moisture in the tunnel had caused the mud, dirt, and rocks to shift. Ander, Elaine, and Kerri all managed to stumble on the slippery surface. Elaine and Ander avoided any of the acid, but Kerri wasn't so lucky.
Her right knee landed in a small puddle and she screamed. When she fell over, her face hit the ground and her ear landed in a different puddle. Her scream was cut short as she passed out, face still in the acid.
Lia rushed over and pulled her out. As soon as Elaine reached her, she pumped her highest healing spell into her friend. The two women saw the faint glimmer of the magic as it wrapped itself around her burned knee and ear. Kerri came to groggy consciousness, but still needed Lia and Elaine’s help to get out of the tunnel.
The six of them were a messy sight when they finally got back to their camp. Carric had owlbear skewers cooking around the fire, as he salted and divided what was left of the meat. He’d managed to wrangle a few extra days of rations out for everyone.
"What happened?" Carric cried as he stood up and helped Kerri. Elaine and Lia set about laying out Iados' and Kerri's bed rolls and the two patients were deposited on them.
"Acid," Ander grunted, as he struggled to carry the large blanket of coins by himself.
Elaine dug into her pack and pulled out her medicinal kit. Ander gave her some extra medical supplies that he had as well. Over the course of the next hour, Elaine was able to create a salve that she slathered onto the injuries. Iados's foot retained a small scar, but had no lasting damage. It was the same with Kerri's knee.
As long as Kerri used the salve every day for a while, the burns on her ear and face around the ear would heal evenly and not scar. The actual ear though was a different story. As Elaine applied the salve to it, the top half of the half-elf’s slightly pointed ear tore off. There was very little blood, and virtually no pain. Using a small knife Elaine was able to make the tear smooth so it would heal clean and straight.
"How's your hearing?" Elaine asked as she bandaged the top of the ear.
Kerri hummed a little ditty first before she answered. “Seems fine.” Elaine sighed in relief.
“I think we should stay here for another day before we head out, to give you two time to heal fully before heading back to Rocklyn." Lia suggested from her place next to Iados.
The akudaem sat up against a wall, his foot elevated on a bedroll. "No complaints from me, I'd rather start my new life as an adventurer on the right foot." He grinned at his own pun. There were a few groans in response.
"Actually, about the adventuring party," Jun started.
Ander stood up. "Don't tell me you're chickening out? We need you, you're the muscle!"
Jun held up a hand and smiled. "Thanks, but I was just going to say that I need a bit of time before I start up. There's a place I've been meaning to go and I think now's a good time before we start this."
"Where are you headed?" Carric had his knife out and he whittled some arrow shafts. His search of the settlement had turned up a few arrowheads.
"The Silver Rise Mountains outside Dayur. There's some people I need to meet up there." Jun admitted.
Ander sat back down. "Then I'll go with you." He pulled out the circumluci and put it in his lap. He still had a command word to find for it. "I've actually got some business in Dayur, and to be honest we need to get certified before we just run off and pick up jobs."
"How about this then,” Carric said. “Since there's actually someone I want to talk to as well, let's take some time and get our affairs in order. How long is it gonna take for certification to come through?"
Ander shrugged. "It could take anywhere from a week to several months."
"Ok, how about we meet up in three months then?" No one had any objections to Carric's suggestion.
"We can meet up in Esterwill at the monastery." Iados offered. "They're used to having people crash there, so if we have to wait a bit longer for approval we can just stay there."
"Sounds as good an idea as any." Lia pulled out the journal again as she settled more comfortably against the wall.
The ranger smiled. "Alright then, we've got a plan. We'll head out tomorrow, go our separate ways, and meet up in Esterwill in three months' time." He laughed. “Also, to celebrate our new group, I’ll waive the rest of everyone’s guide fee.” Everyone laughed.
Iados looked over at the halfling as the light ball started to rise and hover above the short man. "What kind of info will be the Circle be needing anyway? Does a past in piracy disqualify you?”