That dammed mage just threw massive fireballs at my house! I spotted the two idiots with my surveillance system, so I prepared my upgraded LED to give them a warm welcome. However, they gave me an even warmer present. The two spells smash against my walls, causing a burst of superheated steam to erupt. I can feel the heat from here! My walls are not going to survive another attack!

What should I do? There's no going back if I shoot them, but it is-

A loud explosion makes my ears ring. As if it wasn't enough, the front of my house burns down when the next burst of fireballs hits.

"There you are!" a crazed Nicole shouts as arcs of golden flames come out of her hands. I can't help but gulp, am I going to survive this?

"Listen, we can-" I'm interrupted by having a fireball thrown into my face. I thank my foresight that made me buy magical armor, or I would be dead right now. Instead, I barely felt a bit of heat. "I know you are angry, but-" Once again, Nicole doesn't listen as she keeps pelting me with increasingly stronger fireballs.

A tear comes out of my eyes before dissipating into steam when I glance at my couch. Or rather a pile of ash that once was my couch.

Fuck, I liked that couch. It was expensive too.

"I will turn you into ash! Die!" the mage shouts as she switches to lightning spells. I duck to avoid a zap of purple electricity that smashes into my TV, thus making the expensive device melt.

Okay, that's enough. Even Mary looks like she's a bit scared. I need to calm her down if we want to talk this through. I grab my shotgun and put my rifle on my back. With any luck, her shield will endure the first burst. I switch the weapon to buckshot and pull the trigger. A loud, deafening noise similar to what a gun mounted on a fighter jet should make echoes.

I can barely hear anything since firing the gun is just that loud, but I don't care. Being shot thousands of times should calm her down. Hopefully. Repeated noises of glass breaking keep reaching my ears. I sincerely hope that I didn't hit any neighbors, but I keep firing regardless.

"Stop!" a faint voice reaches my ears, "STOP!" it's way louder this time, unnaturally so. I stop firing, and the dust caused by our fight clears out. I cough some dust, and my eyes are irritated. My driveway, if I can even call it that, looks like a massive meteor crashed into it.

The two sisters are at the center of that crater, they are both on one knee and panting like they've run several marathons at once.

"M-Maybe I did go overboard," Nicole mutters. My jaw drops as I glance at my house, which is missing most of its front.

"You call that a BIT overboard!" I shout back. The mage glares at me and narrows her eyes.

"Maybe I have more energy left in me," she grimaces as she tries to get up.

"Don't. Please." Mary grabs the hand of her sister. I raise an eyebrow; I would have never expected Mary to be the reasonable one here.

"B-but," Nicole mutters. "Why are you acting like that after what he did to us?"

"Seeing you so enraged took me out of my stupor. Look around you!" Mary asks, and Nicole glances over the destroyed surroundings.

"Shit," she says while slamming the ground with one of her fists.

"I hate him beyond anything. Trust me." Mary glares at me with anger before focusing back on her sister. "But is our vendetta worth getting fired from the Agency? Is it worth making our family disappointed in us? I don't want to throw away everything we have worked so hard to accomplish for some random idiot."

"I'm still here, you know," I interject.

"And I wish you would drop dead, but we can't have everything we want. Now shut up." Mary replies. "Nicole, let's do what we came here to do; Maybe we'll be able to get our money back."

I scratch the back of my head, "About that. I have no way of reimbursing you. Not that I intend to. You attacked me, so I defended myself. And you destroyed my home! I am the one who should be asking for reimbursement!" I yell back as I aim my gun towards them.

"Let's stop pretending for a moment, it's getting on my nerves," Nicole says as she dusts herself off after getting up. "We detected a hint of Mana here, and we know your house lit up."

I click my tongue, did my preparations bring them here? They also somehow sensed my MageLight.

Does that mean that I would have been fine if I didn't do anything?

"Considering what we know about you, it's obvious that you are a member of the magical world. Now tell me your name." The woman says as she grits her teeth. Her disheveled appearance makes it hard to take her seriously, but I still have her in my sights in case something goes wrong.

"And why should I tell you anything? Do you think that you can come barging into my home and destroy everything without repercussion? Eat shit! I'm not telling you anything. Now get off what remains of my lawn." I say back. Who do these people think they are? They attack and almost kill me afterward because they are mad that I didn't let them turn me into a vegetable.

Royal Road is the home of this novel. Visit there to read the original and support the author.

Fuck these people, wizard or not. I'm not going to back down and let them do whatever they want with me.

"Who the fuck do you think you are?" Nicole shouts back, "Do you have any idea of who I am?"

I straighten my stance and discreetly switch my gun to slugs. If Nicole wants to fight then I'm unleashing everything. "I have no idea, and I don't care. I have no intention of bending the knee to some random bitch drunk on authority. Now get the fuck out."

"Everyone, calm down!" Mary shouts. "We have nothing to gain from fighting." She makes a meaningful glance towards her sister, who clicks her tongue and back down.

"We detected Mana, and we know it came from you." The woman says, "So don't play coy, pay your fine and tell us who you are. Then you will follow us so we can handle the matter regarding what you stole from us."

I can't believe my ears. Do they realize that they are in no position to negotiate? Are these two brain-damaged?

"Let me summarize. You attacked me and tried to fry my brain for no reason. Then you barged into my home and tried to murder me, multiple times I might add, and destroyed my property. Now you think you have any sort of authority to order me around." I say with a sneer.

Mary opens and closes her mouth a few times before exhaling loudly, "Fuck this." She says before slamming her staff on the ground.

Blue energy forms into a ball at the top of her staff, "I suggest you listen to her," Nicole says with a smirk. "Or an unfortunate accident might wipe out everything in the Veil." She says as she hands a few Mana Crystals to her sister, who crushes them in her hands. The crushed rocks produce arcs of energy that the spell absorbs.

I can't help but gulp. This thing looks like it could level the entire neighborhood. I focus on the spell, and the Object Editor comes up.

***Warning! Unknown parameters detected! Cannot Edit Object! Universal Interface Level ??? recommended! ***

Fuck me. Of course, the price-gouging MERTICORE would fuck me over in a time like this. This time, it doesn't even show me the level of the Interface that I would need, so I can only guess that it's way beyond what I can afford. Can I somehow edit Mary to save myself?

***Warning! Cannot edit this category of Objects!***

Well, it was worth a try. At least, I know I can’t edit people now. It’s a shame, it would have really helped.

How could I minimize the impact of the spell then? Shooting her might work, but it could also release an explosion of Mana that would destroy everything in its surroundings. It would also anger that stupid Agency even more and-

Wait a minute. Those two mentally deficient wizards work for some sort of Agency! I doubt they would condone the destruction of an entire 'Regular' neighborhood. That's the term these magical sorts use for- well, for regular people. Very imaginative, I know.

Maybe I can bluff my way into stopping them by threatening to report to their supervisor? I only have that option left if I want to defuse the situation. Is my life hinging on the fact that an agency staffed by egotistical wizards cares about collateral damages? Yes, it is.

It seems that I'm terrible at making decisions.

"Wait a fucking second!" I shout as I pull out the granite slab that once belonged to Nicole. "Stop this spell right now, or I'm going to call your fucking supervisor!" I say as I wave around the device. Do I even know if these two have a supervisor? No, I don't. But it's my only ticket out of this situation without angering that Central Magic Agency.

The sisters freeze up when I mention their supervisor. I can barely contain my grin; it looks like the threat of unemployment is far greater than been turned into a vaguely human-shaped pile of red paste.

Man, the economy in the magical world must be in the gutter. I almost feel bad for the sisters now.

Who am I kidding? I don't.

Nicole clicks her tongue, "And what of it? Do you think I care? Do you think we care?" she says as she gestures at the destroyed landscape that surrounds them.

Okay, so they might be slightly afraid of losing their job but not enough to not commit something akin to a war-crime.

"What about your family then? Will the great Farsight family be happy that you two are causing havoc and destruction because things didn't go your way? Are you an eight-year-old child throwing a tantrum?" I bluff again. I sincerely hope that she has some family members in her contact list, or I'm fucked.

"Don't ever mention my family again, filth!" Nicole spits on the ground. "If you know the weight of our name, then you know that our offer is extremely generous considering the circumstances."

Shit, so it looks like I was right. These two idiots are from a powerful family who probably has a ton of influence. It means that a minor incident such as burning me alive will be covered-up without anyone noticing.

"Come with us, and give me my fucking Credits back!" Nicole and Mary shout in unison.

I freeze in place. They did all of this bullshit for some money that their supposedly rich family could replace with a snap of their fingers? That's- I don't have words to describe how stupid the situation is. Did they make so much mess just for their pocket money?

"You know what, I'll come with you," I say to the two idiots. "But I'll lodge a formal complaint about your idiotic actions. Maybe you didn't notice, but I recorded everything up to now." That isn't a complete lie. My surveillance system did record everything until the point where they destroyed most of my home. "And don't think about sweeping this under the rug or shooting me in a dark alley. I have systems in place, and the recording will be released to every news outlet if something happens to me." I waggle my finger in the air like a scolding parent.

Now, will they believe my bullshit? Or is the Farsight family so influential that they control every media in the magical world? I guess time will tell.

Mary and Nicole exchange a glance after clicking their tongue, "Will you come with us? Maybe we can work something out."

I nod, "Of course I will."

Good old-fashioned backroom deals. Works in every world it seems.

"Ahem," Mary says with a wry smile. "Sorry to interrupt, but I might have slightly surcharged the Mana in this spell."

Nicole's face turns pale. "Fuck", she mutters.

I raise an eyebrow, "Is that bad?"

"We never actually planned on using that spell," Nicole reveals. Somehow, I doubt her words. Maybe she's acting more reasonable because she thinks I'm recording her? "But there is the slight issue that Mary can't cancel it now."

"You're telling me that no matter what, this magical bomb will have to go off," I say after taking a deep breath.

I should have seen that coming. These idiots are so incompetent it's a miracle that they survived for so long.

"You're going to destroy my home no matter what." I take another deep breath. Don't let anger take control, don't ruin it. I know that I have virtually infinite money now, but losing everything because these two couldn't act like reasonable adults is a hard pill to swallow.

"Y-You should prepare your defenses. Like right now. My control is slipping, and I can't hold much longer," Mary says with her sweat-covered face.

Of fucking course.

"There will be consequences!" I grumble, but my words are drowned out by the loudest explosion I ever heard.

A bright flash engulfs the entire area, but it's nothing compared to the power of my anger as the blast sweeps over me.

I fucking hate wizards.