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McDaonalds | The Road of Fast Food Cultivation!
Chapter 1 - I don't get paid enough for this.

Chapter 1 - I don't get paid enough for this.

As someone who lives in the 21st century, Jacob has done his best to follow YouTube tutorials and succeed in his educational life. He's studied as well as he can in school, he tried hard to be social and finally made some friends, but in life there are two constants.

Work and death.

For Jacob though, these two things may as well be synonymous with one another. Despite all his attempts to better his life, he'd ended up a minimum wageworker at a McDonald's chain - the lowest point of his life if he was being honest.

Working his hands at the mess left on the floor from the busy day today, Jacob toiled to clean up the restaurant and have it looking at least decent before someone ruins it again tomorrow. As his last co-worker left the restaurant, he was left all alone.

The hours passed as he focused on cleaning up and having things in order. He was so focused on it, that he hadn't even taken the time to notice the change of scenery beyond the windows.

"There, that should probably do it. Now I can finally go home." Standing up and stretching his back, Jacob walked towards the door and opened it up with a 'ding!'

What he saw, wasn't exactly the sight he had been expecting.

Is that two fucking moons??

Before he had a chance to process the addition of a new moon, he dragged his eyes to his more immediate surroundings. Buildings arched and glowed with lantern lights as darkness prevailed over the earth. The few people he saw walk past him were dressed in ancient Chinese attire, and were usually accompanied by weapons draped on their waists or backs.

As Jacob looked at them, they in turn looked back at him - looking just as confused by his presence as he was by theirs.

Jacob didn't really know how to make sense of... anything, so he decided to ignore it and switch his brain off, going back inside the restaurant.

What the fuckkkkkkkk...

***

Sitting down in one of the chairs and pressing his palms against his temples, Jacob tried to wrap his head around his current situation.

Alright so number one, we seem to have magically transmigrated to another world. Two, it seems the restaurant came with me. Three, judging by the clothes of the people I saw outside, I'm probably in some kind of cultivation world.

Jacob had a habit of reading trashy Xianxia novels in his spare time, so he wasn't too uninformed regarding the matter of transmigration. He just hadn't expected it to ever happen to him.

Don't people in these kinds of situations get a system or something? Where's my one??

Just as he began to worry over the lack of a golden hand, Jacob heard a pop-up notification sound in his ears. Turning his head upwards, he saw a black window box with the words 'Fast Food Cultivation System' written at the top, and immediately he felt the imminent threat on his life.

"Aren't these windows meant to be blue? What use is a fucking fast food system?! They have sword qi and demons! The hell am I meant to do, throw a burger at them?!?" As Jacob lamented his lowering chance of survivability in this world, the system dinged with another pop-up.

[Congratulations on activating the Fast Food Cultivation System!]

[Strive to teach this world the glory and deliciousness of fast food. Swords may rule the skies, but food rules the heart!]

[Beginner gift package available, accept?]

Jacob spent a few moments questioning whether the system had a screw loose. However, as soon as it popped up, he accepted the beginner gift package notification and rubbed his hands greedily.

"Give me a heaven defying cultivation technique, weapon, treasure or something!" Holding his hopes high, Jacob watched a little animation of a gift box opening in the black screen. Not dissimilar to opening a loot box, all things considered.

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After a little fanfare and a trumpet noise, Jacob looked at his screen and...

[Congratulations! You've earned Restaurant Upgrade Lvl1, Self-Cleaning uniform, and access to the system store!]

I... don't know what I expected, honestly...

Jacob messed around with the system interface for a bit, and eventually ended up at his inventory with 2 items inside. The Restaurant Upgrade Lvl1, and the Self-Cleaning Uniform. Clicking on the Restaurant Upgrade Lvl1, Jacob saw it disappear from his inventory as his surroundings immediately changed.

Before, the restaurant had still been the same dinky fast food chain that had been brought over from Earth. Now though, the tables and chairs were replaced with classy, expensive looking woods - the chairs having some kind of red silk draped over the seats and filled with cotton. Not just the tables and chairs though; the floor had been replaced with some kind of luxurious marbling and everything inside the restaurant just seemed shiny and new, like it wasn't McDonald's at all!

Speaking of that, Jacob noticed a slight change on the menus and logos around the store. The system seemed to have put an extra 'a' in McDonald, making it spell 'McDaonald.'

He couldn't tell if it was a joke, or if the system expected him to comprehend the Dao whilst eating a Big Mac, but either way it was entertaining.

Looking around the restaurant, Jacob could hardly believe that it was the same fast food store that he had been barely scraping by in for the past few years. Everything looked sparkly, fresh and new.

"Well, I can certainly praise you for doing a good job, system!" He smiled a bit at the redecoration. Despite everything kind throwing curveballs at him today, it was nice to see the store in a clean state - Jacob had always tried to make it as clean as possible, but the customers always ruined things.

[The system thanks you for the praise.]

"Oh wait, you're sentient? That's both cool and weirdly invasive. What if you watch me when I bathe?"

[The system tells it's host that it has no concept of gender. Even if it did, you wouldn't be worth watching.]

"Hey!"

***

Walking around the store, Jacob was still incredibly pleased with the job the system had done. Not a spot of dust to be seen, and not a stain in sight.

"System? I was wondering something," Jacob spoke inquisitively. "Where exactly am I supposed to sleep?"

[...]

"Did.... did you seriously forget?"

[The system realizes that it has made a small error. Developing an addition to your Restaurant Upgrade Lvl1.]

"Wait wait, you can make mistakes?!" Jacob sighed hard and put his face into his hands for what may have been one time too many today. "I'm so fucked."

[The system informs the host that it too is new to it's job, and is simply following a given directive to spread fast food culture in this world. Sleep... is now being added to said directive.]

"Don't forget my general health, please!"

This time, the system didn't respond and simply created an addition into the restaurant. What was before a single-floored fast food chain, now contained a second floor with stairs leading upwards. Upon inspection Jacob found: a bathroom, a bedroom, a shower, and even an extra room that could be repurposed for whatever he might think of. Once again, he couldn't help but praise the system on its interior decoration aesthetics.

Suddenly feeling the wear and tear of the day lean into him, Jacob decided it was time to get a bit of sleep and crawled into his bedroom, wrapping up cosy in bed as he thought back on the day he'd just had.

I really don't get paid enough for this.

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