Chapter 22

“No,” I replied flatly, watching him pick dust clumps out of his hair. “Only you would think it’s funny to freak out the whole house by hiding under Loris’s bed.”

I rolled away and sat up so I could start undoing my shoes.

“Oh? If I recall you were the one who had the staff shrieking two days in a row because you couldn’t be bothered to sleep in the bed.”

Lunch would be ready in a little bit, and my stomach was already rumbling. I scowled at him and pointedly took off my shoes, dropping them just shy of hitting him in the head.

“Oy!” he batted at my feet. “There’s a better place to do that!”

I grinned and pulled off my socks as well, letting them fall directly onto his face. With a squeal of disgust he rolled out from under the bed and shot to his feet.

“Repulsive! That’s just- ugh!”

Then apparently he caught sight of my feet and went quiet again.

“What? You’ve never seen toes before?”

“Not incomplete sets, no. So how did they-?”

“They froze off,” I shrugged. “Or fell off. I wasn’t awake when they went missing. Chelsey Lynwood had just shot me in the back.”

Bentley suddenly grinned, “Not shot ‘Loris’ in the back?” He gave a cry of triumph.“Ha! I knew you couldn’t be as idiotic as you pretended!”

I grumbled as I jumped off the bed and started pulling off my jacket and clothes.

“There’s a better place to do that!” Bentley cried, pointing towards the closet. I thought about flashing him out of spite, but there was something so ridiculous about his down turned mouth and earnest eyes that I just snorted and went to the closet. Besides, there was something else I wanted to check out.

I hadn’t really given my closet much notice while pulling clothes out of it. There was a door then three walls, about three good paces each with shelves and bars with funny wire frames to hang clothes on. All total it looked to be about the size of a smaller Plainsman’s wagon. It was still more clothes than I had ever seen worn by the entire tribe. I shoved my arms between the hanging garments and began feeling along the wall to my left. There was nothing unusual about its flat surface that I could find. I continued down to the end.

“I think that bronze drawstring blouse would look very fetching under that leather vest paired with the paisley pants, right over there.”

I jumped. Bentley was standing in the doorway.

“Get out!” I hissed.

“What? I’m just helping you dress for dinner!”

“OUT!”

In a flurry he disappeared. I stared at the armful of clothes I was elbow deep in. Why did it bother me if Bentley saw me out of my clothes? I shook my head.

“It’s the one just to the right of where you are.”

“OUT!” I bellowed, whirling around.

It was just Bentley’s arm poking inside the door pointing to my right. I could hear my teeth squeak as they ground together. I grabbed the orangish shirt he was pointing to.

“Not that one. That’s pumpkin. The next one.”

“What?!” I stared at his hand then reached out and grabbed the next one.

“Yes! That one!” He gave me the thumbs up. I sneered and stuck my thumb up at him as well. “And then that vest and those pants. Oh! And that hat! Definitely that hat! The one with feathers!”

Mechanically, I moved around the closet picking up the garments Bentley suggested then paused. There was silence from outside of the closet as well. After a second, just as I’d guessed, Bentley’s head peaked around the corner.

“Well? Have you tried them on yet?”

I was ready with a fistful of shoes.

“OUT! No looking while Loris is changing!”

“I wasn’t-!”

“No looking! No eyes! No face! No hands! No voice! Go sit on the bed!”

“But! But!”

One shoe clipped the frame of the closet dangerously close to Bentley’s face. He vanished like a mole. And after a few seconds I heard the bed frame squeak.

I finished my exploration of the back and right wall, still finding nothing, then changed into the new outfit. The vest wasn’t too tight and the pants, though wildly decorated, were fuzzy and comfortable. On the back of the closet door was a mirror. The girl I saw there stared suspiciously at me, her eyes narrowing to take in my braided hair, my washed face, my stitched garments and my bare feet, sans three toes. She was not afraid. After a second her expression relaxed.

“This too we can learn to do,” I told her.

“What?” I heard Bentley and had to smother an aggravated growl.

“What Loris to do with you!” I yelled back then stepped out of my closet. Bentley had indeed planted himself on my bed. He was lolling on his stomach, legs kicked up behind him like he was enjoying an evening in front of the campfire. He eyed me. The corners of his mouth twitched a few times until he let himself break into a full grin as he swiveled back to a sitting positon.

“Yes. That will do. Much more Adéle Blanc-Sec, less Princess Sarah. That will do nicely, I do believe.”

“Bentley shouldn’t believe all he sees.”

He rolled his eyes, “Oh come on! Not that again! Look we’ve established that you can speak like a well-heeled human being. Why won’t you just talk like one already?”

I crossed my arms and leaned against the wall.

“What does Bentley want?”

Bentley’s features brightened then softened into that damnable angelic face again. I swear, his skin turned translucent and glowed as his cheeks pinkened.

“To help you.”

“Bull plop.”

Bentley put a hand to his chest, face suddenly struck with grief. I had to admit, he was definitely Pilosa’s child.

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“Loris! That’s so mean!” He coughed delicately. “I’ve just been considering some of what you pointed out on your last visit.”

“That Loris is here to replace you?”

He nodded vehemently.

“Yes, yes. Of course. You raised several good points.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really. You show a very logical, calculating mind,” he had the gall to grin, “not unlike me. I have to admit, I really thought you’d just be another rug to our cousins. I won’t admit it often, Loris, I may have underestimated you.”

“Is Bentley trying to flatter Loris?”

His eyes widened, “Not at all! What? Don’t you think you are capable of making people rethink their prior assessments? Don’t you think more people than I underestimate just what you’re capable of?”

I hesitated. Bentley nodded.

“Being underestimated is not necessarily a problem if all you’re planning to do is skirt under the watch, so to say. But if you ever want to achieve anything noteworthy for yourself, say a permanent place in New Castle where you never have to look over your shoulder again, then at some point you will need to learn not just how to blend, but how to impress.”

It only took me a couple strides to cross the room to stare down my nose at Bentley. He stared serenely back, smug prat.

“What makes you think Loris hasn’t already found her place at New Castle? Mother likes Loris. Granddame Caitlyn accepts Loris. Even cousins tolerate Loris. What makes Bentley think Loris wants anything else?”

“Pshaw!”

Yes, he actually said that.

“Seriously, Loris, I saw you the other night with that Jinkins chap. What’s his name? Tokay? Toupee? Toucan?”

“Trochi,” I answered flatly. “Trochi Jenkins.”

“You don’t have the wrong idea, allying yourself with other Wardensans who could support your position. But please, Loris, you’re an attractive enough option. You can do better.”

I was curious.

“Better than what?”

Bentley tried to keep a straight face, but the tips of his ears suddenly flushed bright red.

“Come now, there’s no need to banter about it. I know Crane saw you, so certainly she said something.”

I shrugged, “Crane asked if Loris had a good night watching Mumsy sing. I said yes then went to bed.”

Bentley sputtered, “What?! She didn’t say anything about you-about you-“

“About Loris what?”

“You were snogging!” Bentley fairly exploded.

“What? When?”

“Just right there! In front of the house last night!” Bentley’s voice went up an octave. “I saw you! I saw him lean in, and, well, like a hat hides anything! You kissed Trochi Jinkins! He’s way too old for you! He’s like, sixteen. He’s not even originally a Wardensan you know. He’s a Test in. Big surprise for everyone, you know, but everyone suspects the Jinkins are just a bunny farm for the Jenkins anyway.”

I stared at Bentley, his arms crossed, ears burning, short legs kicking away furiously off the edge of my bed.

“Wait. What did Bentley just say?”

He shrugged and pretended to look at something on the far wall.

“That Trochi Jinkins only gets to be called a Wardensan because-“

“No not that. The other thing about the-the”

Bentley looked back at me accusingly and spat it like the word offended him.

“The kiss? Yes, I saw that from my bedroom window.”

The tightness in my chest and the burning in my face returned.

“Stop! Bentley is making Loris sick!”

I waved my arms in the air then flung myself on the bed, jarring Bentley who protested then moved over so he could cross his arms and scowl at me again.

“Imagine how I feel.”

I glared, “Loris did not kiss Trochi Jenkins. Trochi was whispering in Loris’s ear and probably didn’t want snoops to listen in.”

One of Bentley’s eyebrows went up.

“Snooping? By watching you through a window?”

“Yes!”

I knew Jack Gimlet could do it. He sniffed out a whole conspiracy against Chief Ortega at one of the plains meet-ups with other caravans just by watching the mouths of the women in the other camp move.

I shook my head.

“Loris did not, and would not, smoosh faces with Trochi,” I paused, “Not that he doesn’t have a nice face for smooshing.”

Bentley snorted, and I went on.

“No! Trochi helped Loris get away from Owls, and from Gimlet. So Loris invited Trochi to the birthday party Pilosa’s throwing.”

“You invited him to the party?!” There went the octaves and Bentley’s arms back in the air again. “I almost wish you’d kissed him!”

I scowled and stuck my foot out, giving him a rough shove off the bed. Bentley grabbed the rail and swung around.

“Hey! I’m just looking out for you!” he rubbed his bottom. “Although, that would explain why Crane didn’t get after you. Hmmm, surely she can’t approve of-“ he paused and stared at the ceiling muttering as though doing calculations then looked back at me and grinned. “Ah ha!”

“What?”

Bentley nodded to himself, “And did you happen to meet anyone else while you were out causing the type of scandal mother seems to live on?”

I shrugged.

“Loris met plenty of others. There were other Jinkins and Giada with the long braids. Uncle Parissi and Owls. Although, Loris was trying really hard not to meet any Owls.”

Bentley nodded eyes half-closed.

“I see. I see. So that’s what Crane is up to. You’ll be wanting these then.”

Bentley reached inside his vest and pulled out a thick stack of letters. I stared at them and Bentley for a few seconds, just long enough for Bentley to start getting uncomfortable.

“I didn’t take them if that’s what you’re implying. I found them. In Abbi’s waste bin, curiously enough. The, ah, seal on a few of them was already broken, so I took the liberty of investigating their contents to verify their intent.”

“What?”

The color burned all the way up Bentley’s face this time.

“I wasn’t really snooping! Look, it’s all a good Second would do anyways. I tried to put the wax back like it was, but I couldn’t reproduce the seal on one, so I figured it would be better just to come clean.”

He shoved the letters towards me again. Hesitatingly, I took the stack and flipped them over. As far as I could tell, they looked perfectly fine. I turned one over. There was a silvery blob of wax on one side with a gear shape pressed into it. I slid my finger under the flap and popped the envelope open. Upon extracting the paper inside, it was exactly as I feared. I couldn’t understand a single word.

“Oh yes, Beka Thurman! Now she’s an ally I would recommend having. A female Thaumaturgist of all things. Very sharp. Very practical. Did you know she aced her exams the first time she took them?”

I nodded, “Yes, Loris was there.”

Bentley paused for a moment, “Oh yes, that’s right. Purgatory.” He shook his head. “Anyway it sounds like she’s having a great first semester at Uni, fitting right in, misses her workshop since she had to leave some projects behind. She, ah, inquired about a chap named ‘Moron’. That had me curious until I remembered you mentioning him. I found one of his letters in there too. Finnias Treadgold Wiglaf the Ninth. Goodness, what a mouthful! I, ah, took the liberty of replying to Beka for you since she sounded so concerned about a few matters. I, ah, hope you don’t mind.”

That startled me so much I dropped the stack.

“You what?!”

“I replied to her for you. She wrote back fairly promptly too, which tells me she is definitely eager to maintain contact with you. Smart girl. Every Thaumaturgist dreams of having a matron going through Uni. Did you know they already have her working on gear boxes? It sounds like she might be involved in the locomotion department or something. She couldn’t say much, but I thought it sounded fascinating. ”

I stared at the pile of writing, eyes swimming, hands getting clammy. All that was in there? That one sheet of paper? I shook my head.

“Why are you telling Loris this?”

Bentley beamed back at me. I could tell he’d been waiting for this moment. His eyes fairly shone.

“Because I have decided to become your Second, and together we will make New Castle truly the beacon on the hill!”