Abby did not want to go to Ryan's basketball game. All she wanted to do was stay HOME. Lila had insisted it would be good for her to get out. Whatever, like watching stupid boys run up and down a court would make her forget EVERYTHING. The instant she walked into the gym a wall of noise hit her like gut punch. Music blared over the loudspeakers. God why did people always have to have music? She liked SILENCE. Couldn't people gather without trying to destroy their eardrums? Cheerleaders were dancing to the horrible music. Cathy, Ryan's ex-girlfriend was among them and so was her friend Dewanda. The girls were really shaking their butts and boobs. A hundred years ago they would have been arrested for lewd behavior but now it was just what girls did to support the team. Ahead of her, David pushed through the crowd. To Abby’s amazement, he was wearing actual shoes, black high top chucks. Had his flip flops finally died? She also noticed, his sweatshirt did not have a single stain on hit and his jeans well, they were ripped out in the knees, still this was fine attire for David.

At the bleachers David stopped. He glanced back at Abby. Another thing she did not like, well hated were the bleachers.They were the kind that folded up against the wall. Always she imagined them snapping shut and crushing her to death. Yeah, it was going to be a fun evening. David found a seat near the top. When she sat down beside him he said, "If this thing closes we will be safe up here." He grinned at her. How did he know about her stupid phobia? Too often David defied all logic.

Down below, she saw Ryan shooting warm up baskets. She sighed. He was cute. Too cute for his own good. Things were still weird between them but less awkward. In time, hopefully, they would be back to being friends like they had always been. She saw him glance up into the bleachers. David waved at him and he waved back. A big smile lit his face when he saw her. It was not a smile of infatuation, but love, the kind of love they had always shared. It was good to have him smile like that at her again. Abby raised her hand and waved too.

The game started. Ryan was not first string, he was only a sophomore. Half way through the game he finally got to play. Near the doors, Abby saw Hugh. He had gotten off in time to see Ryan play. The game proceeded. Basketball made more sense than football did, at least to Abby. There was a really cute boy on the opposing team with red hair and every time he made a basket she secretly cheered for him. Finally the game was over, they had won, yay. David and Abby made their way down to the floor. When they reached Hugh he said, "Let's get home."

David asked, "What about Ryan?"

"He has a ride." Hugh glanced at Abby. His eyes were bright. He had a secret and from the look in his eyes it was a good one. They made their way through the crowd and out to Hugh's truck. The gym was a short drive to their house. Turning down their street, Abby saw Grammy's car in the driveway. She was home! Hopefully for the whole night. As soon as Hugh stopped the truck the drive, Abby leapt out of it and ran across the street to her front door. It wasn't locked. She stepped inside. The house was quiet. Though, the Christmas tree lights were on in the living room, there was not any Christmas music playing. She walked into the front room. Grammy sat on the piano bench. Cradled in her hands was something. She lifted one hand and her wiped her eyes with it. Slowly she turned and looked up at Abby. "Hello Sweet Heart."

Abby went to her and hugged her. “Are you staying here tonight?”

“Yes, Chester’s doctor sent me home. Said I needed to rest. So, here I am."

Grammy trembled when Abby let go of her. Abby asked, “You okay?"

Grammy nodded. "Just thinking that's all."

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"About what?"

Grammy showed Abby what she was holding. It was the little porcelain Mary from the Christmas crèche. In a faltering voice she said, "I just realized tonight that she knows what I'm going through."

Was Grammy loosing it? Porcelain figurines didn’t have feelings.

Grammy got up from the piano and went into the dining room. She put Mary back beside baby Jesus on the table. For several silent moments she stared at the fat little porcelain baby then her eyes traveled to the baby picture of Chester on the hall wall. In a low voice she said, "Mary had to watch her son die too."

Abby said, "I wish you didn't."

Grammy turned and looked at Abby. The twinkling lights on the tree colored the room red and then blue. She said, "I'm grateful I can."

"Why?"

"I love my son. I couldn't bear finding out he had died without me there. I can't take away his pain or this damned illness, but I can walk with him through it.” Softly she added, “I'm thankful he has given me the opportunity to do so."

"Opportunity?"

"It's something I can't explain. Someday when you have your own children you will understand."

Abby wasn't sure she ever wanted to understand. She reached for Grammy's hand. Grammy laced her fingers through Abby's.

"It's late," she said. "I'd like to tuck you in tonight if you don't mind."

"Okay." Abby followed Grammy up the stairs.

*

Abby stood in the living room waiting. In a few minutes she and Grammy would be going to the Christmas Eve service at their church. She picked up the baby Jesus from the crèche and rubbed his chubby tummy and looked at the picture of Chester on the hall wall. There was a resemblance. Chester was still in the hospital. Though no one said it out loud, Abby knew he was never coming home.

Grammy came into the room. She was wearing a navy satin dress with tiny rhinestones on it that looked like stars. Her eyes scrutinized Abby. Self consciously, Abby smoothed out her stiff green taffeta skirt. Grammy said, "Twirl." Like a little girl, she spun around, for her grandmother's examination. Grammy smiled. "You look like a picture."

"Thanks, so do you."

Grammy smirked and said, "An old picture, that’s for sure.”

Abby shook her head. “No, a beautiful picture."

“Thanks honey.”

Abby put baby Jesus back in his place. God had named Jesus, but she had no idea who named her. She asked, "Who named me?"

"What?”

“You heard me.”

Grammy’s face flushed, and she said, “I heard you and I am the one who named you."

This was not a surprise, Abby had not even dared to hope Chester or Susan had named her. "Why did you choose Abigail?"

"I chose Abigail because it means the joy of the father." Grammy noticed Abby's frown, but continued, "My son had just left home. I didn't know where he was and yet I cradled part of him in my arms. I prayed one day he would come home to you."

A knot formed in Abby’s throat. She said, "So it is true. You did keep me because I was his."

"Of course I kept you because you were Chester's, but you aren’t just a part of Chester, you are also a part of me and…” she paused, before she said, “Grandy. The best part. I couldn't give you up.” Her voice grew very soft, “And just like I prayed and believed when I named you, you do bring joy to Chester. His eyes shine, when you walk into his room. He loves you."

"He has never told me so."

"Sometimes love flows like a silent stream between two people. Both are aware of its presence whether they speak of it or not. Do you believe that?”

Deep down, Abby did. Chester didn’t love her like she wanted to be loved or like she had hoped to be loved. Still, she had to admit, it felt like love. The kind of love Chester could give. Unable to say it out loud, Abby just nodded her head.

Grammy gave her a quick hug, then said, “Come on, we need to get a move on. You know how much I hate getting stuck on the back row.”

Abby did. They grabbed their coats and rushed out into the cold night.