~
Lucy’s POV
I am
Happy
And satisfied
I have never been like this my entire life
Either I am happy but I know I can be happier
Or I am satisfied because things can’t get any better but sad because I know that these are the best things in my life and they aren’t even making me happy
Now I am both
Now I am in love
I am happy and satisfied with my love
Days are going by swiftly
It’s December now
It’s really cold here
But my body’s always warm
It’s true that I have had two boyfriends before
But I have never been in love
It’s my first time
Exams are going to take place soon
But even that has a plus side
I can study with Andy
It’s less study than staring
Like now
That face, I want to kiss it
Well, I can, I am his girlfriend after all
But
It’s been 3 months since we are going out
And we haven’t even held hands properly
It’s depressing
I should make him aware of this
“Hey, Andy I want to talk about our relationship”
“Can’t we talk about the third law of motion”
“That can wait”
“Okay, let’s talk”
“Don’t you think we should increase our pace?”
“What do you mean?”
“The pace at which our relationship advance”
“You mean that, Oh”
“Yeah, we haven’t even held hands properly”
“You have got a point there”
“So what should we do?”
“Let’s start now”
He reached out his hand and I immediately took it
Warm
Soft
Strong
Thin
Slender
I was sitting beside him in our room
Miles was in the library with Sara
I bet they are doing something like this
I shifted a little closer towards Andy
Now my leg is touching his
I leaned over a little
He didn’t move a muscle
I am truly, eternally, blissfully happy
~
Andy’s POV
I am with Miles now, in our room
He wanted to talk about something important
Lucy was with Sara currently
Lucy
That has a good ring to it
Yesterday I felt surprisingly happy when I held her hand
It was warm, soft, and smooth
It’s a good hand
I think I do like her
Not just as a friend but as a girlfriend
I think I know now how Miles feels about Sara
Until now, I only viewed her as a friend but yesterday, I couldn’t
I want to spend more time with her
I used to think love was illogical
Still do
But
Sometimes it’s the very essence of illogical things that make logical things possible to exist
That’s a good line I should write it down
I want to be with her
Let’s just get things over here
“What is that you want to talk about?
“Lucy’s past”
Huh?
There was an unspoken rule that ensured our friendship
DON’T TALK ABOUT LUCY’S PAST
Although I haven’t asked her straight about it
But she always seems to get uncomfortable when she knows her past is where the conversations is going
Like that night
She leaked that she wasn’t a virgin
I was really surprised because she has turned 16 this year
We did a little party
She was 15 before that, I am pretty sure the age of consent in the U.S.A is 16
So did she do it even though she was underaged?
Now that’s a story I want to listen to
Maybe I will, I am her boyfriend after all
“What about her past?”
“I know why she is hiding it”
“I thought we weren’t supposed to—“
“You want to know it or not”
He handed me a diary
I opened the page which was bookmarked
June 15th
Today I pick my niece up from the airport. Her name is Lucy. I married her mother’s sister. So I am her relative but not by blood. She has gone through some tragic events in her life. She lost her mother when she was small. Her father is dead because of her or at least that’s what she thinks. It was heart attack. She was shouting at him as he breathed his last breath. I took her under my wing. I did that because either it was me or her aunt who refused to do it. Now I plan to make her join my school. Some change in environment might cure her mentally.
...
She lost her mother
She lost her father
She is an orphan
So that is her past
What?!
How can my cute girlfriend be an orphan?
She can’t smile if she is depressed
Or was she hiding it
From whom?
From me?
Why would she possibly do so?
“What is this?”
“Diary of Principal J”
“Is it true?”
“Yes”
“W-why, Why did she”
“THAT’S WHAT I WANT TO KNOW!!!”He shouted
His face is red and his voice is cracking
I have never seen him this angry
“Even though we were friends she didn’t trust us," He said in a voice that said let me cry “Or was I wrong about us being friends!”
The truth is he is a sensitive guy
He doesn’t take things like these well
I was with him when his uncle died
When he received the news on phone he cried for hours and didn’t eat for two days
I had to force him to eat it
“You are making a bigger deal out of this,” I said
“OH! Yeah, What about you?! You two are dating. She said she loves you but what kind of love is this when you don’t know that your lover is an orphan”.
“We are high-scholars. We can’t even spell love”
At this point, I lost him
He sat on his bed with his back facing me, hugging his knees and...
He cried
It reminded me how he cried when his uncle died
Suddenly the door opened
And someone who shouldn’t be here entered
~
Lucy’s POV
I entered our room
I was thinking I will tease Miles about the kiss he courageously gave on the cheeks of Sara
I thought they will be in the same position they were supposed to be
Miles doing questions of some textbook and Andy on his laptop
I thought I had to steal Andy for sometime
That I will be holding his hand on the roof
That I might get the lucky and long-desired kiss on my cheek
But
But I guess I got ahead of myself
They weren’t in the position they were supposed to be in
Miles was at the corner of his bed and Andy standing in the middle with a diary
It was a purple-colored diary
I recognized it at first glance
No, It couldn’t possibly be that
Of course, it would explain why Miles is tucked in the corner of the room sniffing
And why Andy is having a horrifying disappointed look on his face
It can’t possibly be that
It just can’t
Please! I beg you god don’t make it that
Please!
“Hey, what a-are you guys doing”
“You did not have to hide it” Andy spoke silently
No
NO
NO!!!
“What?”
“That you are an orphan”
These words pierced my heart as my deepest fears became true
Them knowing
I am doomed
“Why?
Why do you guys have to know?”
Without realizing I said it
Tears started forming in my eyes
I ran
Andy’s POV
I ran after here
If you come across this story on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.
“Wait!”
She isn’t listening
I think she is heading toward the roof
I chased her for a while and sure enough, the roof was where she stopped
She sat down looking toward the evening sun which was about to set
“You didn’t have to hide it ‘you know?”
She began to cry
I sat down beside her
“Hey, I don’t want to see my pretty girlfriend cry”
As gently As I could I withdraw her wet hand from her cheeks and hold it
“Do you want to talk?”
“A-Aren’t you a(sniff)-angry?”
“I am sure you must have had your reasons” T-Thanks”
“Now, do you want to talk?”
“Yes”
And I listened to her talk
Lucy’s POV
The truth is I lost my mother when I was four
After her death, my father burned down everything that made him remember her
The only thing he didn’t burn was me
He started avoiding me
Even though he lost his wife he should pay attention to his daughter
So I started doing things that would get him to notice me
Notice my existence
Notice that I am there
I took his car without permission and crashed it into our fence
He didn’t notice me
I abused in front of the principal
He didn’t notice me
I got into a fight
He didn’t notice me
I stole jewelry from a teacher
He didn’t notice me
I failed every exam
He didn’t notice me
Now I give up
Nothing can be done
But my friends do notice me
Why do I need my father when I have my friends?
In it was a boy named Zach
He asked me out and I said yes
At a party in one of my senior’s house
We drank alcohol and got ourselves drunk
That night we slept together
That morning when I woke up
I had someone notice me
He asked me how I slept
He ate breakfast with me
He noticed me
Now I had someone who notices me
Surely I won’t let him go
We made sleeping together a habit
Even though we knew perfectly well that we were under-aged
Even though I just stood still for most of the part
Even though I never enjoyed it
But he notices me
He doesn’t ignore me
At our school prom
We did the same thing
But we were caught going into the bathroom together
My dad got called to the principal’s office
When we arrived home he spoke
He spoke!
He noticed!
That was supposed to be something which I should be happy about but
But it doesn’t feel that way
Why?
I should be happy about it. I waited for it for years
But
Then, why?
Then why does it feels so wrong
“Why are you doing this to me Lucy?!, Even after your mom died—“
“Mom is dead for 10 years dad! , For 10 whole years. You must have been over it by now”
“Your mom was the only thing which brought me happiness in this world”
“Then what am I to you?”
“You are nothing but a disgrace, you don’t deserve any life. It should have been you who died that night but no! You lived and my beloved wife died”
“OH! Then why didn’t you kill me, you would have done me a huge favor. I am sure death would have been better than this life that I am living and...Papa! Papa wake up Papa! PAPA! SOMEBODY HELP!! ANYBODY PLEASE! HELP!”
The ambulance arrived after sometime
Somehow, deep inside my heart
I knew
I knew that he was dead
But
But I held onto the thought that they would, through some way or the other, bring him back to life
Because
Because if he was dead
Then I will be tormented for my whole life
They carried him on a stretcher and I never left his side
But we finally separated at the operation theatre
In just a doctor comes to me and says the word I already know
“I am sorry”
I fall down on my knees covering my face with hands, crying
I killed him
I killed him
I KILLED HIM
I cried for what seemed like an eternity
“Lucy!”
Somebody is calling me
I look up to find my uncle
“I learned what happened from your neighbor, I am sorry and, I want you to know it wasn’t your fault”
You don’t know.
It was my fault
“It’s lucky I was in town. Let’s get you something to eat”
That was how I became an orphan and a killer on the same night
After that, it was decided that I will join my uncle’s school this session
It doesn’t matter what’s to come
My life is already over
I am dead
~
Andy’s POV
As I listened to her talk
I found out how little I know about her as a person
To me, she seemed a stranger foolishly disclosing her heart to its own content
She was practically a stranger to me a minute ago
I never knew that she was in so much pain
I never even bothered to ask her
No
That is not right
I didn’t ask her because I thought she didn’t want to talk about it
Was that the right thing to do?
Is the pain she is experiencing now worse than the pain she could have experienced instead
No, no good thinking hypothetically
It’s illogical
I have to comfort her now
“Hey, you did the right thing”
“Not telling my friends that I was an orphan was the right thing to do”
“I am sure you had your reasons”
“The only reason I had was that I didn’t want you to be sorry for me”
“I am sorry”
“See that’s exactly what I am talking about”
“No, I am sorry because you were neglected that much in your life”
I held out my hand and she took it
In fact, she squeezed it really tight
Then she leaned over me, resting her head on my shoulder
“I am sorry that I didn’t tell you before”
“And I want you to know that it wasn’t your fault”
“... If you don’t mind I really don’t want to talk about it”
“If you don’t talk then emotions will build up inside of your heart”
“You are right”
“So?”
“I still think it was partially my fault but, they said it was a stroke”
I laughed
Partially, that’s an improvement
“So what do you plan on doing with Mad Miles”
I picture a Miles weeping in the corner of the room
Then me forcing him to eat something
“I never knew that he would be so angry”
“You still don’t know him enough. But I won’t blame you for not being at he time his uncle died”
“What did he do?”
“He didn’t eat for two days, cried the whole time, I had to force him to eat something”
“Is it that bad?” she said with a worried face
“Yeah”
Her shoulders dropped down
She looked very sad
“Don’t blame yourself for this”
“Then I won’t have anyone to blame this on”
“ Maybe there is no one to blame this on, maybe sometimes you don’t have anything to blame”
“...”
“Blame it on me then. Blame it all on me”
She blushed lightly
Then she drew closer and kissed me
That came out of nowhere
But I don’t seem to mind it
Soft
Her lips are so soft
Then something weird happened
HER TONGUE TOUCHED MY LIPS!!!
“Ugh”