Minho’s POV:

After I woke up, I just lay there, to spent to do anything. What if Newt wasn’t okay? Time passed slowly and quickly at the same time. I was hungry but not hungry. I was cold but I was warm. I was dead but not dead. Finnaily, Finnaily, I heard footsteps, but then I saw Gally’s face, my hopes died.

“What do you want?”

Gally looked sheepish. Huh, I’d never seen him look like that before. . .

“Well, I, I just wanted to say. . .”

Gally was fidgeting with his hands

“I just wanted to say I’m sorry about, you know, what I said. It’s not been easy since I’ve been stung. . .”

I don’t know what I was thinking, but I jumped up and hugged Gally. Maybe my brain had been fried from all the traumatic stuff. Gally just kind of stood there, while I squeezed him. After a couple seconds, Gally pushed me off looking embarrassed

“Why?”

“I don’t know.”

I had some brain issues for sure now. There Newt was, possibly dead, and I was here hugging Gally, for no reason. That reminded me

“How’s Newt?”

I wanted and didn’t want to hear the answer. Like when you need to know something but don't necessarily want to know in case it's bad.

“Well, that's what Alby told me to tell you. Newt’s ready to be visited by now. I think he really needs you.”

Without saying another word I bolted towards the med-jack hut. I mean, I felt kind of bad for just leaving Gally there, but come on. I was just about to bolt inside the med-jack hut’s entrance, when a hand caught me by the arm. My momentum nearly pulled my arm out of its socket. I turned and saw Alby there, still holding on to my arm.

“Ow, Alby, come on.”

Alby let go of my arm, but gave me a look that said if I ran in, I would die.

“Okay, what is it?”

I grabbed my arm and started vigorously rubbing it. Good think I was already at the shucking med-jack hut, because Alby might have broken my arm. Alby’s face looked slightly grave. I paled

“D-Did he die?”

Alby looked surprised, then chuckled

“What? No, no he didn’t. It’s something else. You know he broke his leg?”

“I thought so”

“Well, it’s broken. . . forever.”

“What does that mean?”

“Well, he’ll have a limp, and he won’t be able to run without being in pain.”

“So, so he can’t be a runner anymore?”

“I’m afraid he can’t. . . ”

I don't shucking care! I mean, like, duh, I did care. I cared about it more than anything in the world. I cared about Newt more than anything in the world! But, right now, all I wanted to do was go see him. . .

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“Why are you telling me this?”

“Because I just told Newt, and I didn’t want you to accidentally mention running, and upset him.”

Good point. I would never want to do that.

“Good that, can I go in now?”

Alby nodded, and I bolted through the door and to Newt. He was on the upper floor, and I skipped three steps at a time trying to get there. When I entered his door, I saw him lying on the makeshift bed, and I ran over to him. I hugged him. I kissed him. I started crying.

“Newt, oh, Newt, I thought you were gone!”

Newt just looked at me

“If I had done it right I would be.”

My heart broke all over again.

“Why didn’t you tell me? Why?”

Newt’s voice was deadpan

“Because I was being stupid.”

“Newt, you are never stupid. Never.”

“I was so stupid It didn't even work. . .”

I brushed his hair out of his eyes

“And who says that's a bad thing?”

“Me. I do.”

“Newt, you got a second chance to live, use it.”

Newt’s mouth was twitching downward

“I-I don’t deserve it Minho. I d-don’t deserve it. . .”

I grabbed his hand.

“Newt. Look at me.”

Newt lifted his face and looked at me. I saw dry tear streaks and red eyes. Oh god Newt. I could only imagine what you're feeling right now.

“Newt, if any one has ever deserved anything, you deserve to live.”

Newt’s words and breaths were shaky

“N-No I don't Min, I don't.”

“Newt you have never done anything to make you not deserve life.”

“I couldn't find a way out. So I let the gladers down.”

“Sweetie, no one has. That's not your fault.”

“I couldn’t keep the runners from dying. I let them down.”

“They knew that was a possibility. You didn’t let them down.”

Newt’s eyes brimmed with tears

“I tried to leave you. I let you down.”

Tears were falling from my cheeks now, onto the dusty wood floor.

“Newt, honey. You can never let me down. It was my fault. I should have helped you.”

Now he knows. Now he’ll hate me.

“Min, this isn’t your fault. If anything, I don’t deserve you, not the other way around.”

“Newt, baby, you deserve everything you want and more.”

Newt managed a very small smile.

“Well. . . right now I want you.”

I climbed into the makeshift bed next to him.

“Of course. I’ll never leave you again.”

Newt didn’t say he wouldn’t leave me. He didn’t say he wouldn’t try again.

“Newt, promise me you won’t do it again.”

“I-I-I”

“Please, Newt.”

“I’ll try, I’ll try as hard as I shucking can.”

Good enough for now.

Newt’s POV:

I knew what Minho wanted to hear. That I wouldn’t do that again. But, I couldn’t promise that. Not to myself, not to Minho, not to anyone. Would it be better right now if I was dead? Then what I had done caught up to me. Maybe the fact that Minho had actually acknowledged it, instead of ignoring what I had actually done. The fall came back to me. The feeling of weightlessness. The crack of the concrete and my leg. The sadness and happiness of seeing Minho after I jumped. I was shaking. No tears left to cry. Minho was still next to me, and started rubbing my back.

“Newt, baby, it’ll all be-”

Why did he stop? Instead, he snuggled closer to me, and brushed his leg with mine. I gasp a sharp inhale of breath before recoiling from Minho. Minho noticed, and immediately moved back, not touching my leg. I turned to Minho.

“M-Min, I’m sorry, I-I didn’t mean to recoil-”

He grabbed my cheeks and forced me to look at him.

“Newt, Newt sweetie. Not everything is your fault. You don’t have to apologize for me touching your leg.”

My breath had become unsteady as I tried to keep it together.

“I-I know, Min. I just, just can’t help it-”

On the word it, my voice broke and I stopped, biting my lip to keep from crying.

“S-Sometimes I just c-can’t help it. S-Sometimes I j-just think everything is m-my fault, a-and I can’t reason w-with my b-brain. . .”

I was shaking harder now, and wrapped my arms around myself to try to stifle it. It didn’t work. Minho forced me down and wrapped a blanket around me. Then he put his extra blanket on me too.

“Min, you need this. . .”

It got cold at night.

“Not when I have you.”

Why was he so nice? I didn’t deserve him. . .