From my earliest memory, I've always been inferior to my kin. No matter how I tried, I was always weaker, slower and less talented. No, I never had any talent to begin with.

As the youngest of my eleven brothers and sisters, I envied all their blessed gifts, including my sister Chiyoko who is scarcely older than I. And standing at the top as a shining beacon, the embodiment of all a Kobold can be, is my honoured father. If I were born to any other family... I would have long been discarded. The only reason I am here now is entirely due the grace of my father and the love of my mother.

... I am truly wretched. Despite being blessed with such a wonderful and kind family, I find myself consumed with jealousy. As each of my siblings came to age, each contributed to the Nomura clan in great ways. But as I grew to adulthood, I was not disillusioned by such dreams. All I could ever hope to be was an aid, and yet I was too afraid of becoming a burden. So, I lived my childhood looking forward to becoming a stepping stone.

But even that small wish was denied, as I realised the depth of my incompetence...

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"Big brother! Why are you leaving mealtime so soon?"

"Geh! O-oh, hello Hachirou. I didn't see you there. I was just, um, planning to skip today's lunch to tend to the ill."

"While that is a noble deed, big brother, why do you have a travelling bag slung over your shoulder?"

"Errr, this is... Sigh, please keep this a secret from the others, little brother, but I plan to find a human trader... on my own."

"Wha-! But father strongly forbid you from doing that! We're already preparing an expedition..."

"We don't have a choice, Hachirou! Our mother is dying! If I leave with the others, we will lose too much time."

As he says this, he is already preparing to depart, but I grasp onto his sleeve in protest.

Indeed, big brother Hayate was the fastest kobold in our branch by leaps and bounds, and he had experience dealing with humans. At the time, he was certainly our best option, but even so... I knew he was wrong.

"Please Hayate, at least take Big Sis with you! If it's our sister, then you won't lose too much time!"

"I'm sorry Hachirou, but Chiyoko is barely seven years of age. I plan to run through the nights and traverse the highlands

without rest. As talented as she may be, it will be too much to ask of her small body. Besides, have you seen how shy she was around Mr Duwick? She would faint if she met half a dozen humans."

He ends with a hollow laugh in an attempt to ease my tension, and while doing so, continues to walk away from my outstretched hands.

I remember. I remember how dearly I wished to join him instead, and yet I was all too aware of my own weakness. I cursed my own inability to offer anything to aid him, or suggest anything to stop him. But in that desperate moment, I still had one more chance.

"I-if you go Big Bro, I'll cry for the others!"

"Wha-!"

He hastily rushes back to cover my mouth, but it's not enough to stop me. If I make enough of a ruckus, father and the rest will surely notice and put an end to his departure. My brother gives a heavy sigh before slowly releasing his grip.

I thought I had stopped him. I thought I had finally done something right for my family. But with my own hands, I stole that future and plunged the entire clan into sorrow...

"Listen Hachirou, I need to do this. I would never live with myself if I knew there was a better way, and this is the best way."

"But what if something goes wrong? What if you have an accident or..."

"Don't worry, my brother. I promise I will be back."

No, don't listen to him!

"Besides, with the hunting party following my tracks, the journey home will be a lot smoother."

Please, I'm begging you...

"H-hayate..."

"Look, I know you're only worried about my wellbeing, and I know if I do this everyone else will be worried too. But I want to make everyone happy, and I know it is possible. So please Hachirou..."

No, no...!

"... believe in me. I will surely save our family."

NOOOOO!!!

"... I believe in you, Big Bro Hayate. But when you get back, I want you to try my latest recipe, okay?"

"Good grief, the only ones who can stomach your food is mother and yourself. I have no idea how you can enjoy each other's cooking. Still... I want to enjoy a meal with the whole family too."

"Y-yeah... ah... "

"Now, now, we agreed. No crying, right?"

My brother embraces me in his arms and strokes my back. Once my sobs quieten, he lets go and says, "See you later, Hachirou." I watch Hayate activate his skills and take off to the hills. Watching his sturdy form disappear in the distance, I feel a sense of relief.

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I was such a fool...

"Please mother, stay with us! Big brother Hayate will return soon, a-and then..."

"It's... alright... my little Hachirou... I'm not... afraid. I'm... at peace..."

"H-hana..."

"My dear... even you? Do not... cry... *Cough* I wish... to cherish my remaining time... surrounded by... your smiles..."

"I-I know, I know Hana. We're smiling, so please... keep watching us smile."

"Giggle, Takashi... even now... you're too cunning..."

Five days have passed, and there is no sign of Hayate or the hunting party. We've been sending Shikigami every day, and yet there is no response. Where are you big brother? Are you still searching for a trader?

"*Wheeze*... Ha... chirou?"

"I'm here mother!"

"When... I pass... I'll be sure... to return. Even through... another's eyes... I want to see everyone... be well... *Cough, cough*!"

"Take it easy, Hana! Here, have a dri-"

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Mother's hand rests on his arm. Father's eyes widen for an instant before closing in acceptance. That one look of resignation destroyed all hope inside me. With nothing left, I try my best to answer her wishes.

"Mummy... is really lucky, don't... you think, Hachirou...? Liv... ing for so long... A big family... Such kind children... I never... thought... not even... my dreams..."

"H-hana?"

"Mum?"

"I'm so tired. It's... getting dark and... cold. The night... I can't... see the stars."

"B-but mum, it's still... it's a cloudy night."

"Hana, here. Take our hands. Do you feel warmer now?"

"It is... you're so warm... so gentle... Hachi... you've grown... big. Mummy is... slee... now. Don't... stay... too..."

"I-I know mum. I'll... I'll tell Chiyoko... and Hayate as well..."

"R-rest easy, honey... I-I'll join you later... I need to put the kids to bed first. Good night, my dearest Hana..."

As a cloud hangs over the noon sun, we each give mother her last goodnight kiss.

The next morning, we are heralded of the hunting party's return. Father and I refused to send a black Shikigami, so we left to tell them in person. But without a single word, both sides realise the truth... The expression on Chiyoko's face resounded with our own.

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"Gasp!"

... Another dream? No, it's another reminder.

I find myself waking before dawn, drenched in cold sweat. For six days, six times I have awoken in the same manner from the same memory, and it all started after my most recent failure.

I should never have agreed to watch over our branch, even for a single day. The disappearance of the children was entirely my responsibility, and it goes to show how incompetent I truly am. I feel this latest disappointment is just another reminder of that very fact.

I sit on my futon for a few minutes, trying to calm my nerves.

It's no good. I can't go back to sleep in this state. I need some fresh air.

I leave my tent and quietly make my way to the cauldron where I reheat last night's meal. As I stir the contents, my heart begins to calm.

As always, I must make myself scarce. In doing so, I won't ruin anything, and even if I do, at least it won't affect my family.

After all, my existence is inconsequential, and I should remain that way.

But why was I born like this? Father taught us that the World Stream reincarnates every living being with intention, so why am I so useless?

No, it may be possible I've already served my purpose. Because two years since I made that tragic mistake, I was given a chance for redemption.

"Oh, hello Hachirou. It's nice to see you up and about so early."

While I leave the soup to simmer, I redirect my attention to Enbos.

"Good morning, Enbos. I see you are reading my father's spell book once more."

"And I see you're preparing breakfast. Um, would you like my help?"

"Please, pay me no mind. I'd rather not interrupt your diligent studies. It is truly admirable."

"Yes, but..."

Though he tries to continue the conversation, he finds nothing to say. Instead, he sits beside me while I return to my task. You really are a compassionate soul, Enbos. I don't deserve your company, and yet you still try, just as Hayate would.

He is the spitting image of my brother. Though their origins differ vastly, their spirits are inexplicably similar. From the day he saved my life, I was drawn to his kindness which he so easily takes for granted.

Yes, my life up to this point could have been for his sake. To introduce him to my father, to teach him our ways and our language, it is more than I ever deserve. After living with us for six months, the entire branch has finally recognised your heart. Though my sister tries to deny it, her softer tone does not escape my ears.

As I bring the soup to a boil, Enbos is suddenly approached by Yuki, Izumi, Shou and Kaito.

"Good morning Big Bro Enbos, Big Bro Hachi!"

"Oh, hey kids. What are you doing so early in the morning?"

"Aren't you glad?"

"Huh?"

"Aren't you glad we got your arm back?"

"Sure, but what has that got to do with now?"

"Well, we decided that as a reward..."

"... you have to play with us for the entire day!"

"Oh, and if you don't, we'll tell Big Sis a ve~ry interesting story."

"You little punks! This is blackmail!"

"Eh? Blackmail?"

"Ne-never mind what I said, Hachirou."

While I may not know how the children earned your favour, I'm sure you would have obliged regardless. That is just the kind of person you are.

"Also... Big Bro Hachi?"

"Yes?"

"We're sorry we left without telling you!" apologises the four children as they each offer me a bow.

"I-It's alright. It was entirely my fault, not yours..."

"Like hell it is! What do you mean without telling? You should be apologising for leaving at all!"

"Now, now, it's alright. But before you play with Big Bro Enbos for the whole day, would you like some breakfast?"

"... Did you cook it, Big Bro Hachi?"

"Regrettably, this is last night's..."

"Yay!"

"We'll be back with our bowls!" they declare before hastily retreating out of sight.

"... Seriously, those ungrateful little-"

"Enbos, would you mind signalling the others?"

"O-oh, okay."

As I watch his thin form approach the whistle, only to realise the folly of his ways and ask a waking neighbour, I feel a sense of relief.

He's slowly spending less time with me, just as I intended. Now that everybody accepts him, they will offer more than I ever could, especially once we reach the mountain branch.

Come to think of it, I managed to achieve my childhood goal. All I need to do now is to fade back into obscurity.

That night, I return to my futon and let myself drift into the darkness.

No more memories... No more dreams...

Just peace within this everlasting shadow.