Novels2Search

94 - Acceptance

Theo walked the pins and needles out of his legs as he left the park. Jenny had slept like stone until sunset, not even waking when he shifted around every now and then. The grass around where they sat was noticeably taller and unkempt than its surroundings, and he was sure more than one Natureborn had come around to see what he’d been doing.

It had been a different experience to The Woods. It was a lot less intense, and the mana it could take before it was saturated was a mere fraction. However, it was a lot more pleasant and interesting, which he chalked up to the variety of plants and roots he could reach, unlike The Woods which were effectively a single super-entity.

The fact that there was a pretty girl napping in his lap certainly didn’t hurt either.

Once she woke, Jenny had rushed off, explaining that she had to be home by dinner. Theo twinged a little, but didn’t show it. It was the second time she had mentioned family, after that comment about her father.

She probably thought he was uncomfortable thanks to the whole ‘rather be free and alone’ thing when he was right there, but that was only partially the reason.

Family was a funny thing to someone who’d never had a proper one. Alan would probably be the closest he had. He didn’t resent anyone with a family, but sometimes he thought about what it’d be like, to have parents to give guidance and feed you.

Theo shook his head, clearing his head of those thoughts. He could continue those ruminations at night after a few drinks.

For now, as he walked through the gates of the inner ring, he learned that a clear head often meant paying attention to one’s surroundings, and Theo’s surroundings had a certain feeling to them.

People were warier. The guards were vigilant and actually on duty, silent and keeping a keen eye on everyone passing by the gate they stood next to. That silence extended to the general public, as people even tried to avoid breathing loudly.

There was an urgency in movement. Nobody in the streets wandered or ambled, all rushing to their destination as fast as they could, alternating between head-down and eyes darting around like a sheep grazing when it knows a wolf is around.

It was a paranoid city, where Theo almost felt the weight of a thousand eyeballs on the back of his head, not because of anything he did to stand out, but merely because everyone was constantly aware of everyone else.

The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.

And even though he walked at a more sedate pace, Theo admitted that he too was engaging in similar behaviour.

He switched between Owl’s Eyes, Dog’s Nose, and Bat’s Ears, cycling between them to stay as alert as possible. It was disorienting, like emerging into the summer sun at noon after sleeping off a hangover, then returning to the darkness just long enough for your vision to adjust, then doing it all over again.

But with three senses.

Maybe The Woods had felt safe. Maybe the park and the Colleges had. But Theo definitely didn’t feel safe now.

Every corner could hide another spy.

Theo couldn’t help but replay the moment when the one they almost captured cut his own hand off with no hesitation. If they couldn’t win with four on one, there was no chance he could do anything besides run if they attacked him now.

His heartrate spiked with every alley, and he soon found himself walking almost in the centre of the road, far away from everyone else (and most importantly, any potential ambushers).

This continued until he reached the Commerce district.

It was eerie.

Worse than people keeping an eye on you as they walked by, was to interrupt a staring match of silent stall keepers, who all swivel their heads in your direction at almost the same time.

In stalls filled with food and novelty, bright toys and supplies, normally animated people almost became wooden puppets, and the strings that held their heads in place were looser than they should be.

That was the worst part. The fact was these were people he’d seen arguing and laughing and smiling. This was the first time he’d seen them silent and afraid.

He was unsettled, to say the least. Some broke eye contact to look more around them, while others kept staring as he walked past, trying to do his best to give all the stalls as wide a berth as possible in the cramped street.

They looked around as if being aware and knowing what was around them would save them from danger. Theo almost wished he could bring himself to believe that too, but once more his mind went straight to the severed hand stuck to the wall as vibrant blood leaked out of severed arteries, pink gristle jelly shimmering in torchlight.

Theo sighed.

He gave up.

He let his body relax, stopped feeding mana to any internal magic, and slowed down.

If he was going to go, if there was nothing he could do to truly make a difference, then any vigilance would have no impact on what would happen if spies suddenly paralysed him and dragged him into an alley.

Sure, he could try to put up a fight, and maybe get the attention of people in the area, but he knew that unless he was at the Guild of Magic or extremely lucky, there was no way any bystanders could change the outcome. Especially once the toxin kicked in.

He could go out fighting, but that didn’t change the fact that he would indeed go out.

It was liberating, Theo realised, to accept that sometimes he could have done his best and it wasn’t enough.

He felt like he could breathe a little easier. The crushing pressure that had forced his body in on itself released, as he found his back straightening and shoulders un-hunching.

While the stalls hadn’t ostensibly changed in the moments since his revelation, the eerie feeling of everyone watching suddenly felt like envy at his lack of worry.

There was almost a spring in his step, as he made his way to the Glass Stopper.