Joe’s dreams were not restful. Filled with binding tubes and masked physicians as he was being shackled into a hospital bed. He kept trying to tell the faceless hospital workers he did not need them anymore, that he was healthy, and that he could heal better than they ever could. No matter how loud he shouted, the shadowy clinicians either would not or could not hear him. They kept coming with needles and IV bags full of poison. He would shrug one off but three more took their place. He pushed them off and tried to run but the hospital blankets entwined his ankles, tripping him. He fell face-first onto the linoleum floor; the pain in his nose snapped him awake.
He was in a dark room. So dark he could not see his hand in front of his face. There was no ambient light coming from street lamps or illuminated business signs. Joe had never seen such complete darkness before. He grasped the covers tightly. In his hands were not industrially woven hospital blankets, instead, he could feel a hand-stitched quilt. At that moment it all came back to him. He remembered dying and Hawking, Rhiley and Buck, the Dellhams and Crowfield. He knew where he was.
He let out a sigh that chased the last of the nightmare away. When he reached up to rub away the phantom pain in his nose, he winced when his fingers found real pain. He lightly tapped the sore spot on his nose and found a small cut. Becoming aware of his body he felt something by his neck. He reached and found a hard round object. Realizing he had the ability to create light, Joe picked a spot on the floor and cast [Heart Fire]. He then looked at the object, which turned out to be a large pebble.
“Good. You’re awake,” declared a voice from the window. “We need to talk.”
Startled, Joe turned to see the slight, sinister gnome perched on his windowsill. “Kaid? What time is it?”
“How the hell would I know? It’s after nightfall and before dawn.”
“Right. Clocks. Probably not very common here.”
“No dung. Are you really awake? If you are going to keep babbling nonsense, I have another rock.”
“Do you use a sling?”
“No,” the prowler stated with clearly growing frustration.
“Then why do you have pebbles?”
“Because I figured you were going to be asleep. So I picked up some from the yard. What’s your point?”
“I’m trying to figure out just how big of a jackass you are? You went out of your way to grab a couple of rocks to hit me in the face with instead of just giving me a nudge awake.”
“I’ve almost gotten stabbed doing that once. Rocks are safer,” Kaid stated smugly.
“For you!” Joe barked louder than he intended to in the house full of sleeping people. He lowered his voice again but removed none of the irritation from it. “Get out, Kaid. I am not listening to some jerk who bounces stones off my face in the middle of the night,” As he began to roll away from the little hoodlum, the unwanted visitor spoke sincerely for the first time since Joe had met him.
“I know how you can help Missus Dellham.”
Joe sighed. He really wanted to stick to his guns and ignore the self-absorbed guttersnipe, but the image of Rhiley popped into his head. And Sarsa. And Konren and Nella. He knew he was trapped. “Fine,” he huffed rolling onto his back. Joe stared at the flickering lights on the ceiling, pointedly not looking at Kaid. “I’m not going to punish the Dellhams because you’re an ass. That being said, you seriously need to work on your people skills. How do we help her?”
“We need to go see Granny Growlbee. I’m sure she could brew something for the wound but I think it would be better if she taught you the magic to do it. She probably won’t make a cure for Missus Dellham and Missus Dellham definitely won’t take anything she knew was made by Granny.
“Why?” Joe asked.
“Because the Growlbees and the Haydalls, Missus Dellham’s kin, have been feuding for generations. I don’t know what it was over. At this point, I would bet half of them don’t remember the original reason either. I figure it don’t much matter. Sometimes a feud becomes a thing all of its own and the reasons it started ain’t really important any more.”
Joe looked over and saw Kaid had entered the room. The gnome was testing the flames burning brightly on the woven rug. “Why would Granny Growlbee teach me her spells?”
“Cause she owes me a favor,” Kaid said looking up with one arm extended into the [Heart Fire].
“And why are you spending your favor with the Witch of Brandy something or other on getting me more magic?”
“Rhiley is really mad at me,” Kaid uttered quietly. “I don’t have many friends. Rhy might be the best one I got.”
“What a shocker! Can’t imagine why?”
Kaid scowled at the healer but continued on. “Like I said, I don’t have enough friends to have one of them mad at me. How was I supposed to know that such an obvious rube had done him a good turn?”
“And if I hadn’t helped Buck and Sarsa, I was fair game?” Joe asked weightily.
“See! You get it,” Kaid said with a surprised affirmation.
“Not what I meant. Never mind. So you’ll introduce me to Granny Growlbee and cash in your favor. You think she will give us a Cure Disease spell for it?”
“Knowing Granny, she will likely tack on something to the deal but, basically, yeah.”
“Like what? I’m not giving a chunk of my soul to some bog witch.”
“She’s a lake witch, not a swamp hag. I’m sure it will just be doing her a favor. I’ll be back here in the morning. Make sure you are ready. Oh and Rhiley can’t come. His mom would gnaw a log if she found out we took him to see a Growlbee. I’d get your rest if I was you. It’s a long walk.”
“I was resting,” Joe began but the shadow in the window vanished before he could say more. “Well this does not seem like a horrible debacle in the making,” he finished to himself. Laying back down, Joe tried to fall back asleep but ended up staring at the [Heart Fire] flames for a very long time. He kept trying to get himself excited about the prospect of going on his first adventure. Unfortunately, thoughts regarding his traveling companion shriveled that joy into nuggets of anxiety and irritation. Joe could not help but chase those spiraling thoughts around in his head for quite a while until he finally managed to nod back off to sleep once more.
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“So what are your skills?” Kaid asked after a couple of hours into their hike towards Brandy Mere. He had shown up late in the morning. Joe had risen with the Dellhams. Joe didn’t mind mornings but between the interrupted sleep and the fact that a farmer’s morning started before dawn, Joe was definitely dragging. Thankfully [Efferous Endurance] was better than espresso. A couple of boosts to his stamina and he had the energy to spare. They had set off from the farm, leaving behind a very distraught Rhiley, when the sun was a quarter of the way up the blue sky.
“Direct healing,” Joe replied to Kaid’s question. “A heal over time. Some assess skills. An endurance boost I’m using right now. I, also have staff and parry but I haven’t had a chance to level either of them up yet.”
“So you have no offense or defense? Your one combat talent is dying slowly. How have you survived this long?”
“I got here yesterday! One frickin’ day, Kaid. Not even a whole day. Give me a break.”
“Well, then we are going to have to play into your one strength. Don’t die. Oh yeah, don’t run either.”
“Wait? What?”
“I have a plan. Trust me,” the gnome’s voice whispered from the shadows.
Kaid Ward has invited you to join his party. Accept / Decline?
Joe looked around, but Kaid was nowhere in sight. He accepted the prompt but doing so didn’t give him any idea where the little man had vanished to. Joe was standing all alone on the trail. Joe heard a slight rustling off to his right but a moment later the bushes to his left shook as well. Joe tried to take up what he thought might be a defensive stance with his staff but to be honest he had no idea what he was doing. When a short spear was hurled from the bushes at him all he could do was try to duck. Unsuccessfully. The spear pierced his shoulder sending a shockwave of pain through his body.
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A Maru-Clan Goblin has injured you. You have suffered 12% of your Hit Points.
Suddenly this became far too real. Joe stared at the length of wood sticking out of his flesh in shock. His mind needed a second to process the assault before it kicked back on again. Yanking out the weapon, Joe slapped a heal onto the wound. Between his 10 ranks in Healing Touch and the bonus from [Survivalist], the magic was more than strong enough to heal him back to full health. Even so, Joe realized that he was in trouble. The shock of injuries was not something one actually experienced with dice or a joystick. In games, you took your wounds and soldiered on, marking off health but not being much affected by its loss. In most games, as long as you had at least one hitpoint you were just as functional as if you had them all. This was not a game.
Where the spear had struck was no longer bleeding but his shoulder still felt stiff and throbbed with a dull ache. Joe had been in pain for most of his adult life and so thought he should have a fairly high pain tolerance. He quickly became aware he was not prepared for the sickening agony of being impaled. He focused back on the world around him to see the next spear already heading for him. He batted it away with his quarterstaff, earning him his first defensive skill level.
Your skill [Parry] has increased to rank 1.
If it had just been just that simple, Joe might have been ok. Unfortunately, these goblins were clever. As he knocked the spear out of the air, another one was hurled from behind him. The second javelin lanced into his leg. Joe swore loudly and with great vehemence but kept his focus this time. He marshaled all the tricks he had learned to deal with pain and paid attention to his one job, not dying. He wished running was an option. Goblins typically were little runts. He should be able to outrun them. ‘Why am I trusting Kaid again?’
He left the spear alone for the moment and dropped a [Heart Fire] at his back. He knew the flames were harmless but hoped it would deter his attackers from charging up behind him and running him through. It also might save his life again. He scanned the bushes while he prepared for another double attack. He faked a grab at the spear stuck in his leg; sure enough, another pair of spears were launched at him. This time Joe hopped hard to the left out of the way of both missiles. He made sure to keep his weight on the unimpaled limb. He really did not want to know what jumping on his wounded leg would feel like. As soon as he had his balance he pulled out the spear and healed again with his [Healing Touch].
He limped back to the magical fire, feeling the warm aura ease the lingering soreness. Around him, figures began to push out of the brush on the sides of the road. Either his enemy had run out of missiles or they had determined that hurling spears from cover was not going to win the fight. Seven small green-skinned humanoids stepped out onto the trail. They had the classic goblin appearance, big ears and sharp jagged teeth, crude weapons, and tattered scrap armor. Hawking popped a message box to the edge of his vision but Joe dismissed it. He did not need the distraction right at that minute. Brandishing his staff, Joe tried to keep them at bay or at least where he could see all of them.
The biggest of the goblins looked around as if counting and barked a command at the nearby bushes but nothing happened. Maybe a couple had run off. In both games and folklore, goblins were rarely ever brave. The boss grunted and stalked closer to Joe. He had a long knife that looked like it had been sharpened far too many times. The little brute lunged and Joe swept the staff in an arc, successfully blocking the attack and cracking the goblin leader in the arm. Another pop-up appeared at the same time a slice of pain plunged in and out of his lower back.
“Not now, Hawking. I’m REALLY busy here.”
The goblins’ main trick seemed to be coordinated attacks. Like a pack of wolves, one would harry the prey while another would do damage. Joe’s limited combat skills did not have any good answers to this problem. The only thing going for him is the goblins' attacks only inflicted minor wounds. Their spears were little more than sharpened sticks and their blades were a mix of broken swords and discarded kitchen utensils. As long as he could keep the six little monsters from tackling him, he had a decent chance of surviving this encounter.
Over the next minute, he healed the stabs and cuts, blocking as many as he could. His new armor turned some of the grazing blows into scratches but even better, his parry really started to improve. His first block had been just about all luck. After non-stop attacks from the five little bastards he now was consciously interposing the hard wooden rod effectively. He still had not figured out how to attack yet but it was amazing how the skill’s improvement was actually making him block more effectively.
He used [Healing Touch] every couple of wounds and even burned an [Efferous Endurance] to make sure he didn’t slow down. So far his mana was holding. If Joe did not have [Mystic] and [Survivalist] he would have been in far worse danger. He could heal as fast as they could hurt him. He was covered in blood, his new armor would take hours to repair and pretty much every inch of his legs and torso was in agony, but he was pretty sure he could outlast the four remaining goblins.
Joe hopped over the fire. This put the pack of goblins in front of him. As they circled around the flames, Joe healed himself again quickly. It was at that moment the little brigands suddenly realized they were only three in number instead of seven. They looked around, growling hostilely. They glared at Joe, trying to figure out what he had done but they knew that Joe had not touched any of them. The trio looked perplexed until a dagger flipped from the underbrush and embedded itself squarely in the middle of a goblin's forehead. The creature crumpled to the roadway leaving just the big goblin and one last shrimpy thug. They started to back away from the point where the dagger was thrown. As the goblin with a spear was about to back into the bushes, it suddenly stiffened and let out a gurgle. The short marauder fell forward onto its face revealing two deadly lacerations on either side of its spine.
“Do you want the boss?” Kaid’s malicious voice asked, unseen from the shadows.
“Want him for what?” Joe replied, still very frazzled. A disappointed sigh slipped out of the concealing brush, followed by a pair of daggers that slammed into the neck of the goblin boss. As the green mugger keeled over, Kaid stepped out of the foliage onto the trail.
“I was right. You make a good distraction. The girly shouting and shrieking really kept their focus on you.”
“Screw you, Kaid. You couldn’t have clued me in on the plan before using me as bait?”
“Would anything else have worked any better?”
“We could have run. I could have carried you if your stubby little legs are even shorter than theirs.”
“They were just goblins. Why waste easy kills?”
“Because getting stabbed really sucks. Getting stabbed a lot really sucks a lot!”
“Oh suck it up. You’re not dead. But seriously, I would work on that lame parry of yours if I were you.”
“I really don’t like you.”
“Yeah yeah. Everyone starts that way and then they realize how good I am and I grow on them. How about this, I’ll split the loot with you even though you didn’t do much?’
“I would like to see you take that kind of damage without me.”
“I wouldn’t have taken any damage. With or without you,” Kaid replied with a galling smugness. “You loot these guys. I’ll take care of the ones I got in the trees.”
“There were more?”
“Yeah you got lucky you never had to face all ten of them. You can thank me later. Go get looting before the bodies disappear.”
First things first. Joe looked at the notifications from Hawking.
Your skill [Parry] has increased to rank 5.
Your skill [Staff Expertise] has increased to rank 3.
Your skill [Healing Touch] has increased to rank 12.
Your skill [Assess Creature] has increased to rank 6.
Your skill [Efferous Endurance] has increased to rank 3.
Achievement: You have survived your first combat. Your conduct has awarded you the following choice of Traits:
[Glutton for Punishment]: Just how many times are you going to let them hit you? +10% to combat evasion skills
[Pacifist]: It is a hard road to always stay your hand. +70% to support abilities. *Note this trait will be lost if you willingly inflict physical harm on another being.
The [Pacifist] bonus was huge. So good that he considered it. On the other hand, Joe knew that he would eventually want to be able to play solo at times. He would want to be able to explore this world by himself. The thought of having to be forever in need of a partner or team, especially with Kaid as the current example, gave him indigestion. +10% to parry and dodge type skills was still very good, so Joe chose [Glutton for Punishment].
[Glutton for Punishment] synergizes with [Punching-Bag]. [Punching-Bag] now has a 10% chance of spontaneously activating and the health threshold increases to 6%.
Joe perked up at that new piece of information. Traits having chains that could improve the effectiveness of earlier Traits was a nice mechanic. Finished with his windows, Joe turned to the battlefield to start looting. Looking down at the dead child-sized body at his feet, Joe felt a shudder run up his spine. In his head, he knew they were vicious goblins but his heart and stomach were not so rational. The last thing he wanted to do was start manhandling the smelly blood-soaked corpses. He knew that looting corpses was a core mechanic of every RPG since the beginning of time, but double-clicking a corpse and doing it by hand are two totally different things. Joe blew out a breath of air and stepped up to the closest bloody body. He noticed the corpse had a slight glow to it.
You have permission to loot Maru-Clan Goblin. Do you wish to loot the body?
“Does that mean I don’t have to touch it? Will it loot everything or just valuables?”
The Loot function will provide you with processed valuables appropriate to the creature being looted. These items will not necessarily be the items the creature has in its possession. Do you wish to loot the body?
‘Hell yeah,’ Joe thought joyfully to Hawking. Instantly the body vanished and was replaced with a glowing mote much like the one that had appeared when he had saved Buck. Instead of being almost white, this shimmering orb was red. Joe touched the light and it popped. Thankfully instead of spraying everywhere, the coins and materials swooped through the air and slipped into his new backpack.
You have acquired 6 copper pennies, 1 bronze bit, and 2 silver quin.
You have acquired a knot of goblin hair and two leather scraps.
Your skill [Coin Catcher] has increased to rank 1.
Joe hesitantly looked into his backpack. He really hoped he was not going to find two bloody chunks of goblin hide and a ball of oily black hair. Happily, that was not the case. The leather was neither goblin flesh nor was it part of the little thug's armor. It was a square bundle, about eight inches in length and width and roughly three inches thick. The packet was made up of clean leather pieces bound by leather thongs. The hair too was not a greasy mat. It was almost like a ball of course black thread. It seemed the loot he received was a synthetic representation, not actual body parts or possessions.
He moved to the next five smaller goblins picking up another handful of pennies and a few more bits and quin. He found five more leather scraps and two more hairballs. He also looted three goblin teeth, a jar of very weak poison called Oil of Illness, and something called a Star-Iron Pendant. The pendant was nothing more than a gray metallic nugget that had a hole drilled through it for the leather thong. Lastly, he moved to the goblin boss.
You have looted Maru-Clan Goblin Boss.
You have acquired 8 bronze bits, 3 silver quin, and 4 gold pieces.
You have acquired one [Keen Knife], and one common Goblin card.