How to [Not] Turn Your Classmate into a Frog
It was just a day like any other. I was sitting in biology class, struggling to concentrate on frog anatomy, while Leks, the most annoying guy in school, sitting next to me, had been pestering me with his ridiculous jokes, trying to make me laugh. He was quite handsome and used to girls' attention, but he was driving me up the wall.
«Hey, Alla! Why did the frog take the bus to work?» he whispered to me.
«… Why?» I sighed, rolling my eyes.
«Because his car got toad!»
… O, Gods… Another pun. I hate puns!…
«Hey, Alla! Why is the frog always so happy?»
«… Why?»
«Because he can always eat what bugs him!»
In a fit of irritation, I'd let my witch power slip unintentionally, and before I knew it, Leks had turned into a frog…
I panicked.
Darkness! What have I done!
Before anyone noticed, I stuffed Leks the Frog into my backpack.
«It’s all your stupid jokes!» I whispered to him, but he just croaked something unhelpful in response. «Yea, very funny!»
As the class continued, my mind raced with worry. I had to find a way to reverse the spell before the last bell rang, but I had no clue how I'd even managed it in the first place. What if I couldn't fix it? What if Leks was stuck as a frog forever? Would he get dissected if I just left him here? I could feel my heart pounding in my chest. I tried to focus on the lesson, but every time I glanced at my backpack, I could see Leks's froggy eyes staring back at me, begging for help… Which was only my imagination of course. In reality, he was making a nest for himself out of my notebooks.
After class, I found an empty classroom and flipped through my spell book, searching for counter-spells that could help. With Leks ribbiting softly before me, I tried a series of increasingly bizarre spells, hoping one would work. But each attempt only seemed to make Leks croak louder, hop higher, or change colors – nothing brought him back to human form.
«Ribbit! Ribbit!» Leks croaked, as if trying to offer his own suggestions.
«Seriously, Leks? You think "ribbit" will help?»
I sighed, feeling defeated, with no idea what to do next.
Desperate, I sought out Angela, a senior student and also a witch who I knew could help. As I explained my predicament she erupted in laughter.
«You turned him into a frog? That's hilarious!» she exclaimed, wiping tears from her eyes.
I gave her an unamused glare.
«Fine-fine… Phoa!…» she sighed, regaining her composure, and continued. «Why don't you just kiss him?»
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«What?! I’m serious, Angela! We’re not in a fairy tale!» I retorted. «Besides, even in a fairy tale, it should be done by someone who loves him, and I hate this guy. He's been a pain in my neck all day.»
«Well,» Angela grinned. «I love everyone. I could give him a smooch in your stead.»
I hesitated but stubbornly shook my head.
«There has to be another way,» I said.
«Suit yourself,» she shrugged. «But if you change your mind, my lips are always available!»
«… Thanks…» I said. But "no, thanks", I thought.
I was about to leave when Angela stopped me.
«Or even better…» her eyes gleamed with mischief. «we could trade, you know. I’d give you something valuable for this frog. Like, my enchanted quill, for instance! It can write essays for you. Deal?»
I frowned.
«N-no…» I said, clutching my backpack protectively. «You can't have him as your pet.»
No matter how annoying he was, he was still a human being.
«Okay-okay,» Angela waved. «Relax, no one's stealing your precious frog.»
She chuckled and walked away, and I thought, looking after her, that I shouldn’t put my guards down with her around.
I spent several hours trying more spells and re-reading my spell book again and again. Leks-the-frog offered occasional croaks, which I interpreted as his attempts to help.
«Really, Leks? A joke? Now?» I groaned when he ribbited something that sounded suspiciously like a punchline to one of his jokes.
Finally, I threw my hands up in frustration.
«That's it!» I exclaimed. «I've tried everything except kissing you, and I'm not doing that.»
Leks croaked sadly, as if he understood. I sighed, realizing I was letting my stubbornness stand in the way of helping him. With the final bell drawing closer, I felt the weight of my decision bearing down on me. Leks continued to ribbit, his froggy eyes pleading with me to fix things (my imagination again; he looked like he couldn’t care less). I tried to think of other options, but nothing came to mind. My thoughts wandered to Angela's offer, and I couldn't help but wonder if I'd made a mistake in refusing it. But something about the way she'd acted made me feel uneasy. I shook off my doubts, focusing on the task at hand. It was now or never; I had to make a choice, even if it meant embracing the ridiculous.
«Fine, let's try it! But if it doesn't work – it never happened.»
With time running out, I found a quiet corner of the school, put the frog on the floor and sat on my knees beside it. Then I grabbed the frog and took a deep breath, steeling myself for what was to come.
«Leks, if this doesn't work, I'm really sorry,» I whispered to the frog in my hands.
I could feel my cheeks burning as I pressed my lips to his slimy frog skin. I held my breath, eyes closed, praying for a miracle, and waiting for something, anything, to happen. The seconds ticked by like hours, and I started to think the whole thing had been a colossal fail.
Suddenly, there was a flash and something changed. I opened my eyes and saw Leks’s face in my hands, his green eyes staring back at me, our noses touching. He was half-lying, and I happened to be straddling his abdomen, but that didn’t bother me.
«O, Gods! It worked!» I gasped, staring at him in disbelief.
Leks looked just as shocked, blinking his eyes as if waking from a dream.
«Did you just… kiss me?» he stammered.
I nodded, feeling a mix of relief and embarrassment.
«Yea, I did. It was the only way to break the spell, apparently.»
Leks chuckled.
«Well, that's one way to get a girl to kiss you. Note to self: turning into a frog works!»
As we laughed at the absurdity of the situation, I thought that Leks wasn't that bad after all.
«You know, Leks,» I said, «I'll admit, your jokes are terrible, but they do help lighten the mood sometimes.»
He grinned.
«I'll take that as a compliment. And hey, you're pretty good yourself. We should start a comedy duo, huh?»
I laughed.
«Sure, but I'd rather be a magician pulling you out of the hat.»
Leks chuckled, and I knew we'd found an unexpected friendship. Who would've thought it would start with a terrible joke, a frog, and a kiss?