Paul mused to himself that this was the second time in recent months he’d found himself in a hotel room with a knife pressed to his throat. He’d been guarding Tamamo, but the convenience store bought coffee had worn off somewhere around four in the morning, and he’d drifted off.
Despite reassurances from Inari that it would be a day before Tamamo roused, he’d been woken up in the grey pre-dawn light by the cold sensation of metal against his adam’s apple. Evidently Tamamo had recovered more swiftly than Inari had promised. Paul glanced to the heap of blankets next to the bed. The tip of Inari’s nose peeking out reassured him that she was well… but he wasn’t about to get any help. Inari was a heavy sleeper at the best of times and she’d been almost asleep on her feet by the time he’d made his way back to the hotel room.
Paul sighed, and studied Tamamo. She had both hands on the knife, and her arms were already trembling, and sweat was beading on her brow. Gently he took hold of the knife tip, noting in passing it was one of those touristy souvenir penknives, and with one hand he slowly moved the knife away from his throat. He could feel her resisting, but even in his own exhausted state, it was feeble at best.
“A word of advice, if you’re going to kill someone, it’s best to pick a knife that isn’t dull, and do it quickly before they wake up.”
Paul shoved Tamamo, barely exerting any strength, but nonetheless rocking her back on her heels from where she was crouched on the edge of bed, sending her tumbling back against the pillows. She swore in what sounded like ancient Japanese, and yanked the blanket up around herself until only her face was showing.
As he studied her, Paul realised that she didn’t seem to be all ‘there’. Her eyes were glassy and staring, and not tracking his movements. It was if she was seeing something other than the nondescript corporate bland hotel room and himself.
Heaving a sigh as he belatedly realised the obvious. Paul muttered sarcastically to himself.
“Well, of course the ancient demonic kitsune suffers from PTSD and night terrors… what else?!”
Slowly and carefully, so as not to trigger her again, Paul reached into the drawer of the night-stand and took out the cheap ceramic incense burner and complimentary incense provided by the hotel.
Tamamo flinched and buried herself deeper into her blanket cave as he lit the incense stick and blew out the small flame. Moments later the smell of sandalwood filled the air. Paul could see Tamamo’s shivers subsiding, but she made no move to emerge from her den.
Moving carefully he took out the snacks from their suitcase, including the inevitable fried tofu that Inari insisted on, and laid them along the edge of the bed. After a moment a small, white hand slid out from under the edge of the blanket and quickly grabbed the ‘offerings’.
Paul sat back in the bedside chair, and listened to the sounds of dainty but rapid nibbling. After a few moments he remarked to the heaped blankets.
“You know… the plan was to just talk to you. I don’t know if you’ll believe me, but I actually don’t want to hurt you.”
“Liar!”
“You do know you’re talking to Inari’s Herald, right? Not allowed to lie in my official capacity.”
“Mother of deceit and her outsider lying lackey!”
Paul snorted, amused despite himself.
“Oh come on, is that best insult you can come up with? Still, it’s been a rough few days for you, I should make allowances.”
For a few moments a confused and distrustful tension filled the air, and then in a voice dripping with skepticism and distrust, Tamamo asked.
“What do you want?”
Paul chuckled.
“Funny, I was going to ask you the same thing. The hotel kitchen will be open for breakfast soon… and since I doubt you’re up to walking, I was going to ask what you’d like me order for you from room service.”
Paul could almost feel the confusion growing, as Tamamo showed her face from under her ‘fort’, distrust warring hunger, but curiosity and confusion were evident as well.
“Food?”
“Yes, bacon and eggs maybe?”
Tamamo opened her mouth, and then shook her head.
“No, it’s a trick!”
She dived back under the covers, leaving just a narrow slit of darkness with two golden eyes burning with hatred and suspicion showing. Paul inwardly sighed, almost, he thought.
“Well, I’m hungry. If there’s anything special you’d like to order, now would be the time.”
“No!”
Paul shrugged and picked up the phone for room service. It wasn’t long before there was knock at the door. Paul was careful to make sure that his back wasn’t entirely to the room, and he was between the bed and doorway as he took care of the delivery.
Tamamo’s nose appeared as he took the covers off what the hotel called a ‘full English’ breakfast. He studied that for a moment, then shoveled half the scrambled eggs and most of the bacon onto a side plate, and placed that within easy reach of Tamamo.
By the time he’d polished off the sausages with fried egg and beans… which he had to admit, weren’t half bad, Tamamo had emerged fully and was sitting up in bed nibbling on buttered toast after demolishing all bar a few stray molecules of the bacon and eggs he’d given her.
They’d eaten in silence, but he’d noticed that her eyes were focused and clear now… although still full of hooded misgivings.
After a few moments Paul asked.
“Feeling more ‘here’ now?”
Tamamo glared at him. Paul sighed, and without looking directly at her remarked.
“It’s called Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I recognise the symptoms from having worked with refugees and combat veterans. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, you’re not broken or weak if that’s what you’re thinking. It’s actually a way for the mind to try and process terrible experiences bit by bit... but sometimes it gets hung up. Things will remind you of what happened and the memories will overwhelm you, making it seem like you’re back there and then. But that’s ok in a way. It’s possible to create more positive associations.. er.. calming and happy thoughts and experiences, things that will slowly overwrite and defuse the trigger...what sets it off...until little by little it blunts the keen edges of the memory. I can help if you’ll let me.”
“Why would you help me?”
Paul smiled wryly.
“Because I suffer from it as well, so I know what it’s like intimately. If I can lessen someone else’s pain than I will do my utmost to do so. I know what it’s like, and I don’t want anyone else to suffer the same way.”
Tamamo bristled, quite literally.
“You can’t possibly know how I’ve suffered!”
“Nope.. probably not. But I’ve seen more than my fair share of war zones, and likewise you can’t know what it was like for me to watch the love of my life slowly dying in my arms, the bleeding inside her skull destroying everything she is… was, and not able to do a damn thing about it, until she drew her last breath and left me alone, stranded miles away from anywhere up a mountain in the killing cold of an unforgiving dawn, and with all the reasons to carry on living cooling in my arms.”
Tamamo stilled, staring at Paul’s twisted smile, grief shining through it like the razors edge of a candy-coloured switch-blade knife in a dark alley. She sighed, shaking her head slowly.
“I’m sorry…”
“It’s ok. We all have our own stories. Some of which are tales of woe. My pain isn’t your pain.. but still there’s enough similarities that maybe we can help each other.”
She chuckled bitterly, shaking her head.
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“Inari has a poet for a Herald… imagine.”
“Author actually, I write books. Trust me, you don’t want to read my poetry. So.. what were you trying to achieve?”
Tamamo sighed.
“It doesn’t matter now… I’m defeated even before I’ve begun.”
Paul shrugged.
“Not necessarily. Look, I don’t know much about you, but what I do know if looked at another way, could be construed as you trying to do good as much as anything.”
Tamamo laughed bitterly.
“Me? Doing good? I’m the evil demon hearted Kitsune, I seduce men and drive them mad, making them my play-things. Maybe I’ll seduce you and steal you away from Inari’s bed into mine instead.”
Paul grinned lopsidedly.
“Yeah.. good luck with that. Inari’s been trying to seduce me too, to no avail. And honestly the whole ‘Rwar! Fear me!’ thing is getting old. You’re not the first yokai that’s tried it, and it didn’t work then either. Come to think of it, turns out that particular vengeful ghost was actually a pretty nice girl under it all, just been treated really badly and was acting out. All it took was a bit of politeness and feeding her her comfort food. The spider demon woman wasn’t half bad once I got to know her either. Inherited some very fucked up ideas from her mother, but to her credit, she’s trying to overcome her bigoted upbringing. So.. yeah.. cut it with the scary monster act Tamamo, you’re not fooling me.”
Tamamo blinked, staring at him is disbelief.
“You… you’re a very odd Onmyouji !”
“A.. what?”
Tamamo frowned, her lips moving silently as she considered her words. Paul had no idea what magic she’d worked to learn modern Japanese, but evidently some translations it struggled with.
“A sorcerer? A master of the Five Elemental arts and commander of spirits.”
Paul laughed.
“Nope, not one of those. I just talk to people… for a fairly broad definition of people that is. But yes, I apparently accidentally bound Aimi-chan to me, so I guess that last bit is true. And yeah, I dabble a bit in magic, trying to learn how to make it work after I figured out how to bring it back.”
Tamamo’s eyes went wide, and she sat up, wincing as abused muscles protested, but still leaning forward on her knees as she urgently demanded.
“So it was you who brought it back! How? Tell me what rite or secret magic you used!”
Paul laughed.
“No magic rites needed. I used science… frankly, I’m not even sure I can do magic directly myself. But I do know how to ink Talismans, and how to create a mana generator...ah, that’s a device that turns electricity into raw magical power.”
Tamamo’s arms gave out, causing her to flop unceremoniously onto her stomach with a surprised huff.
“No magic? Just this.. science thing… Izumi said that’s the understanding of how the world works but… I don’t get it?!”
Paul shrugged.
“Well… with almost all the magic gone I was able to trace where the last little bit of it was coming from under Inari’s mountain. From observing that I was able to study how the natural processes created it, and then duplicated those on a much more powerful scale using technology to copy what nature was doing. That’s all… I still don’t really understand how, or rather why, it works the way it does. But I’ve managed to figure out some of how to do stuff with it, just by poking at it and seeing what happens.”
Tamamo stared at Paul for moment, then rolled over on to her back, grinning up at him.
“You reinvented being a Onmyouji. And solved a puzzle that has been vexing the best of them for a thousand years.”
“Well to be fair, I did have an advantage. When magic was everywhere, it was impossible to know where it was coming from, and without knowing that there was no way anyone would be able to work out how it was being created, because you have to observe the process up close to get it.”
Tamamo chuckled, then sighed to herself.
“If I had only known before…”
“About that...what were you trying to do?”
Tamamo shrugged slightly.
“Hide, mostly.. work my way into a position of influence over someone important.”
“Ah, the usual... then what?”
Again she shrugged.
“I don’t know. It would depend. Free the oppressed. Izumi said there is this thing called a glass roof? Something to do with making sure women don’t get too powerful.”
“Oh! Glass ceiling … which isn’t an actual physical thing, just in case you thought that.”
Judging by her rueful expression, Tamamo had thought that. Paul smiled slightly and carried on.
“Ok, well...I’m doing a bit of shaking things up myself. There’s this thing called human rights… basically a sort of contract between the rulers and ruled, guaranteeing fair treatment. Well, I got the Emperor to agree to extended human rights to cover yokai. Actually, we will probably have to call it something else, but essentially they have the same rights and legal protections as everyone else. That’s just for starters, I’ve got some vague notions about other things I can do to improve life for everyone.”
Paul glanced down, and found Tamamo’s unblinking gaze staring up at him.
“Um… yeah… I mean if you want to go all out for women’s equality, be my guest, but using some other method rather than seducing people. That’s kind of sleazy and a bit degrading for you I’d imagine.”
“I.. you...what?”
Paul sighed, reflecting he did seem to get that reaction a lot lately.
“Ok. Which part did you get lost on?”
“All of it! You managed to persuade the emperor to change the law, so yokai are treated the same as humans?!”
“Well… yes… although it might have something to do with the Emperor being a Ryu.”
“I knew that! I mean The Imperial family line has always been. It didn’t make a difference then, why should it now?”
Paul shrugged.
“Different Emperor, different attitude. He’s actually a pretty decent bloke...ah, which reminds me. I really need to call him and tell him you don’t pose a threat...er… you don’t do you? I mean, I’d much rather we were both on the same side you know. But I’m planning on shaking up the social order somewhat.. just.. my way, not yours.”
Tamamo stared at Paul for a moment.
“Call the emperor... on your phone?!”
“Yes… we kind of need to be able to do that in order to work together. He genuinely wants to make the world, well, Japan anyway, a better place. So, he’s got me on speed dial same as I’ve got him… we talk you know, bounce ideas off each other… ”
Tamamao’s eyes looked like they were about to fall out of her face, they were so wide. Paul sighed.
“Look, it’s not that big a deal. It all came about because there was this group of monster hunters going around eliminating yokai because of some crackpot notion that they were holding the country back from progress, but neither of us had any idea who they were, or how far into government they’d wormed their way. So he needed someone from the outside who he could trust, and I needed someone who could get stuff done that I could trust...and I see I’m just making this worse. Just… don’t think about it too hard, ok? You’ll get used to the madness after a bit!”
Tamamo slowly nodded,
“Uhhh...huhhh… Forgive me if I misdoubt that. But...yes, I think I want to be on ‘your side’ if you’ll have me. If only because I want to study your ways. You have done much.. much more than I could imagine.”
Paul shrugged.
“Right place at the right time… after which it was just a case of hang on for dear life and a lot of frantic improvisation! Hm, and speaking of time. His Imperial Majesty is probably sitting down to breakfast about now. I should call him and let him know you’re ok.”
Paul took out his phone, and after entering his pin, pressed the button of an anonymous contact, with a small dragon icon next to it.
“Good Morning sir… yes, it’s me. I thought I’d better call you to bring you up to speed, as I promised. The bad news is, Tamamo-no-Mae is indeed real and had indeed escaped. The good news is she’s not as bad as she’s made out to be, more of an activist than a terrorist, and she’s amiable to working with, rather than against. We’ve reached an agreement I think.. oh… Ok hang on a moment.”
Paul cupped his hand over the phone.
“He wants to talk to you directly… you ok with that?”
“He wants to talk to me! Of course, how could I say no?!”
Paul shrugged.
“He asked not ordered. That means you have a choice.”
Tamamo stared wild eyed at Paul for a moment, then held out her hand silently asking for the phone. Paul spoke into it.
“Ok, she’ll speak to you sir.. handing you over.”
Tamamo took the small slab of glass and metal as if it would suddenly turn into a venomous snake and bite her. Holding it up to her ear, she found to her horror that her mind went blank… then a dry male voice spoke to her.
“Before you panic Tamamo-no-Mae might I suggest we forgo the usual formalities. It’s far too early in the morning for it, and by the time the proper rituals are observed my breakfast will have gone cold. Is that agreeable to you?”
“Ah.. yes your Imperial majesty, Emperor by divine..”
“Please… just sir will do. Otherwise we’ll be at this all day.”
Tamamao gripped the phone as if it was her life-line, the rushing sound of her blood loud in her ears as she felt like her world was dissolving….
“Ah… yes.. sir. As you command.”
“Hmm. Paul-san tells me you are not as the legends say...is he right?”
“I… don’t know the legends..sir. I do not harbour ill-will to your Imperial.. to your rule, not specifically...I..haven’t been here long enough to form an opinion of it.”
“I see. I trust Paul-sans judgement, as chaotic as he might be at times, he has good intentions. If he says you can be trusted enough to work with, then that is good enough for me. Please, do not prove us both wrong.”
“N..no! Sir. I will serve as best I can, It.. I… I have never been in accord with one such as yourself...sir. I promise, I will not disappoint you if you do not betray me.”
“Then that is good enough. You may hand the phone back to Paul-san.”
Wordlessly Tamamo handed the phone back, dizzy from the rush of events overturning her world, she missed the brief conversation Paul had until he put the phone away.
“Well… I think you’d better get some rest. You look as though you’re about to faint. Probably the result of suddenly finding yourself in rather rarefied heights…”
“Hmm.. yes. Is that.. how you normally speak to him?”
“Well, yes… unless of course there’s other members of the government in hearing range. Then it’s all formal and so on. Personally, I think he likes having someone he can just chat normally to. We even talk sports sometimes. He’s a baseball fan, I tease him cricket’s better.. You know, just two men talking shit. Poor guy doesn’t get to do that with anyone else. I’d imagine it’s a bit lonely being Emperor.”
Tamamo just closed her eyes and scrubbed at her face with her palms.
“He is the Emperor!”
“I know...and he’s also just someone who enjoys a good beer and a baseball match.”
“How can you just say that?!”
Paul shrugged.
“Because it’s true. Look, Inari said I see things differently. I see people, as people. Ok, yes he’s the Emperor, and a Ryu or dragon.. but he’s also a person, not some symbol of state or something. He’s a bloke, who likes doing normal things like everyone else. This is true of all yokai. They’re more alike, than unalike, mostly. That’s the key point to all this. They are people who do people like things. We all eat, sleep and shit the same way.”
Tamamo found herself nodding slowly, trying to see the world Paul’s way, were yokai and humans were all the same, more or less…
Her philosophical musing were brought short by a rather urgent sensation. Swinging her legs over the edge of the bed she tried to stand, and found herself in Paul’s arms as her knees buckled and she pitched forward.
“Whoa, steady. What’s wrong?”
“Ah… you know you said we all eat, sleep and do the rest the same? Well, I’ve slept, eaten and now I think you’re about to find out if the rest is true, because I don’t think I can walk even a short distance.”
Paul’s face reddened.
“Oh… right. Ok, I’ll help. I’ve done worse before now. But lets not mention this to Inari when she wakes up.”
“Agreed! But can we hurry please!”