“What are you saying, mate? Like this?”

“No, like this. Look, it’s been five freaking times already. How are you still not getting it?” Stories was at his wits end. The brute was literally allergic to learning new things. The materialisation of divine abilities as a tangible force was, in his mind at least, supposed to come naturally to every God. It was simple to carry out. Just redirect the natural flow of energy to pool in the palms of your hands, then push it out. Easy peasy.

But Survival seemed to not understand it at all, even with a step-by-step demonstration. Instead of the expected glow that came when divine energy took on physical form, the giant was just slapping the air with outstretched palms – like he was trying to swat at a fly. Stories dropped his arms to his sides in defeat.

“Don’t you have a huge bubble of aura covering a whole damned planet? Just do THAT, but WITH YOUR HANDS.”

“That’s different, mate. That’s like… like opening an umbrella. And that’s not difficult. What you’re asking me to do though, now that’s a whole different beast. You’re basically asking me to sweat on command, mate! Or maybe you just aren’t explaining it well enough.”

“NOT WELL ENOU- If I couldn’t explain something I LITERALLY CAME UP WITH, there wouldn’t BE this experiment in the first place! MATE.“

“What seems to be the problem now?” Order came up to the two bickering idiots, Leffy in tow. The elf curiously examined his surroundings. They were still in the Breezy Plains, yes, but a large square of the grass carpeting the ground had been covered by a sheet of some sort of flimsy, crinkly see-through material. Elves had never seen plastic before, of course, so he marvelled at the material – like the hide of some legendary beast had been laid out in front of his eyes. Gods sure do hunt some strange animals, he thought. Wonder if they’d let me try some of its flesh after the whole blessing ritual’s done.

Of course, it wasn’t that he was that awed by the plastic tarp. For all its novelty, it was just a shiny substitute for animal hide, after all. No, he was only busying himself with admiring the material to keep himself from asking the burning question he really wanted to ask. Specifically being why the so-called deity that had come to them with such grand promises was currently conversing with thin air and gesturing wildly as if there was someone standing in front of her. He didn’t think the lady was crazy, but the way she was now shouting at some unseen apparition and drawing circles in the air with an angry finger certainly didn’t help her case.

Leffy slowly distanced himself from Order, pretending to crouch down and feel the plastic while still throwing sideways glances her way. Yep, now she was flinging punches at that invisible something. And yelling some more. Definitely a few leaves short of a branch.

“…like that! Understood? Do it once for me. Yes. Yes. Ok. Good. Ok, elf boy, you can come over now.”

Oh, she was done. Leffy obediently got up from the plastic sheet and slowly ambled over, looking around for the person that she was talking to before. Nope, there was no one there. Ugh, was this whole thing some delusion by a mad elf mutant? He really wanted to get some superpowers – like learning how to turn himself into a bear or something.

“Stand there. Yes, right there. Alright, God of Survival. From the top.” Another God? Leffy’s head shot up at the sudden reveal of Order’s conversation partner, and he scanned the vicinity looking for a place where another God might be hiding, waiting to spring out and join them for this ceremony. He didn’t have to search for long, though, as he felt his waist heat up – like it was being smothered by a thick swaddling of deer fur.

Leffy looked down – and almost fell backwards on his bum in shock. Well, he couldn’t have fallen down even if he tried, as he was now supported by two large, disembodied hands that had appeared from seemingly nowhere. The humongous pair of appendages suspended in mid-air clasped his waist firmly, like one did when holding a panicked bird that had just been shot out of the sky. Well, he thought nervously. Guess she wasn’t crazy.

“Hold the position for five minutes. Five. It’s what worked before, so there’s no need to alter the duration.” Order badgered the invisible God. Apparently there was at least another God present with them – one that was gripping his sides with warm hands. Leffy tried to keep still and not act like he was terrified at this new development - because he absolutely was. The massive hands on his waist could easily apply just a tad more pressure and squeeze - and that would be curtains for the young male elf.

Order seemed to notice Leffy’s anxiety, and smiled thinly.

“Won’t be long now.” She reassured him. Until you blow up or melt into a sludge, Order thought to herself. Still, the infusion looked promising. Circulation was good. The mortal wasn’t in pain, as far as she could tell. She consulted her mental clock. Four and a half… Five.

“Ok, you can stop now, God of Survival.” The hands vanished, and Leffy collapsed onto the ground a moment later, his feet wobbly with adrenaline. Order immediately went to his side, probing his tummy with cold digits.

“Any pain or discomfort? How do you feel?”

Leffy weakly raised his right hand. “…no, it was just… I’m fine. Didn’t expect those hands… but I’m fine.” Order pried open his left eyelid with two fingers to examine his pupil. “No alteration to ocular receptors, so that wasn’t part of the effects conferred. Or perhaps it may still take some time…”

Order stopped muttering for a moment to address Leffy.

“Well done. I’ll bring over your friend and your sister to stay with you for a couple of hours, and if everything is fine, we should see the results of the blessing soon.” She turned to leave, wiping off her fingers with a cloth she’d produced from the pouch on her waist. So far, so good.

One down, two to go.

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“So what d’ya think the blessing is gonna be? Maybe we’ll grow another set of arms. Or we’ll get the legs of a deer. Ooh, or maybe we’ll get to pick!” Barkly was always the talkative one in any group he was in. Always yakking on about some new exploit he’d gone on.

Treen didn’t much like him. Elves were supposed to be calm and collected; not boisterous and loud. In stark contrast, however, Leffy held the braggart in high regard, always listening with rapt attention as the senior elf spun enthralling tales of adventure and triumph.

Probably because none of his other seniors would entertain him with unrealistic stories like that, Treen supposed. Which is how elves should act. Foolishly following in the footsteps of some fairytale hero you look up to would only lead to one’s demise.

She responded to Barkly’s fantasy with how she truly felt.

“I don’t really care.” Treen proclaimed airily. “Elves don’t need some sort of ambiguous blessing to survive; we’ve already done so for centuries without a guiding hand to keep us away from danger or shower us with protection.”

“Then why are you still here then, miss High-and-Mighty? I mean, I’m here because I want to get some cool new claws to show off to Blossom. Oh, right, you don’t know yet: yeah, I’m dating Blossom now. Was a whole thing while you two were out tracking.”

Treen sighed. Barkly wouldn’t understand – he was one of those carefree spirits that took things as they came.

“If you must know, I’m here for Leffy. He’s still young; this so-called blessing might hurt him rather than help him. Even if he gets stronger because of it - what if it goes to his head? What if he tries to hunt a bear alone? I don’t want to see another one of my brethren-“Treen swallowed to suppress the ball of worry that had crawled up her throat. “Die.”

Barkly laced his hands behind his head and leaned against a nearby tree. “What, are you still going on about that freak accident? It’s been ages! Besides, it was his fault for going in the den during hibernation season. Any good elf would tell you that that’s number one on the list of things not to do if you value your life.”

That was the true reason behind Treen’s coddling of her younger brother.

Four decades back she’d seen an elf, no older than Leffy at the time, succumb to heavy wounds inflicted on his body after he’d wandered into a bear den for god knows what reason. It could have been a dare, or he might have been curious; the cause didn’t matter to Treen. What mattered was the consequences of his jaunt. Miraculously, the elf had made his way back to the foot of the elven treehouses, before collapsing there, slowly sputtering in pain and trickling lifeblood into the soil. His family had found him there half a day later, but it was already too late. The claw marks on his body… the way chunks of flesh had been torn from his face… Treen shuddered as she recalled the gruesome sight.

“Oh, don’t be such a pansy – I’m sure it’ll be fine! It’s just one tiny girl, right? If it comes down to it, there’s three of us and one of her! It’ll be a cinch to overpower and tie her up.” Treen glared at him. He was treating this event too flippantly – like it was a game of treeball. There were no other sentient beings in the world that the elves knew of – the appearance of this stranger at this particular time might be an omen of something worse to come. Maybe there was some advanced civilisation developing outside of their notice, slowly gathering strength and resources over the ages, and now they were ready to conquer all other races that lived around them. That would certainly make more sense than a God descending from the heavens to bestow blessings onto lowly mortals.

But before she could make known her concerns, the white lady had returned. “Finally,” Barkly got up from his relaxed lean, rubbing his hands with excitement. “It’s gonna be our turn now.”

“The blessing was a success, as I expected it to be. Please follow me, and we’ll begin the ritual.” Order caught herself before she spoke any further.

No, what was the point of infusing each elf one by one? They needed a separate sample group; someone that would receive the infusion via transmission rather than direct injection.

“...apologies, miss Treen. I failed to mention this before, but as you’re related to young Leffy, the ritual won’t work as well for you until he manifests the true effects of the blessing.”

Treen waved her hand dismissively.

“I don’t care about that. I can meet with him, right? You’re not going to say something like if I touch him he’s going to explode or something?” Order nodded in the affirmative, and the elf girl breathed a sigh of relief.

“Well, I’m certainly not related to Leffy by blood. Bring on the blessings!” Barkly crowed as he swaggered over to the God’s side, who merely turned and began to saunter back the way she came.

Treen still wasn’t convinced that the God of Order and Knowledge was doing this out of the kindness of her heart. If she truly wanted to help the elven tribe, why bless them in this fashion? Wouldn’t the gift of knowledge, like that God of Greed had granted to them in the past, be more useful in this situation? Knowing how to subjugate the wild animals of their world and keeping them as livestock might have a greater beneficial impact than growing a pair of wings or being able to punch animals slightly harder.

She couldn’t help but flash back to that sight of the dead elf, bloodied and battered, an eyeball hanging from its socket, two fingers completely bitten off. That’s what been bothering me, Treen thought. This is the exact same as that time.

They were standing at the mouth of a bear’s den - and walking in would seal their fate for good.

But with her brother and her acquaintance already within the grasp of the danger that lay before them, all Treen could do was follow in their footsteps.

And pray that they’d all make it back alive.